Chapter 1

“Damn it, Michelle, I told you time and again not to move my things! It’s hard enough being out on the streets trying to protect the city without having to come home and deal with this shit!”

“I’m sorry, Alan,” Michelle pleaded, her voice a hoarse whisper. She knew the look in his eye. He was all out of forgiveness tonight.

“What’s sorry going to do to give me my time back?” Alan shouted, getting right into Michelle’s face. She could smell him now, the scent of tobacco and a hint of fast food; she could feel the heat of his breath on her cheek as he shouted. She would be in real trouble when he began to grit his teeth.

“Just…just tell me what you’re looking for. I can help you find it!”

But it was too late for compromise. It always seemed too late for compromise.

Michelle cried out in pain as Alan’s fist met her cheek and she felt a sudden jolt of alarm. One of her back teeth had cracked the last time and now it had shattered completely. Alan didn’t seem to notice though, nor would he care if he did. Michelle held her head in her hands as the blows continued, until he felt satisfied and pulled away.

“I told you this a million times,” he said. “Don’t move my stuff.”

But not moving his stuff meant that they lived in a filthy home, because God forbid the man ever pick up after himself. She just couldn’t bring herself to live like a pig anymore. Every time she cleaned, she was punished for it. But that wasn’t all she was punished for, not by a long shot. Even things he seemed to exaggerate and imagine got her into hot water. All because Alan was the chief of police and he felt like he could get away with murder- even in his own home.

She tried once before to report Alan for domestic abuse. She had the bruises to prove it and had gone, her hands shaking the whole time, to the police station, where an incredulous man took her statement. He left for a few moments before returning with Alan, of all people, and they sat down together.

“My buddy here says you like to make up stories when you don’t get your own way,” the man, whose tag read Officer Graham, said.

Alan grinned at her the whole time.

“She’s a compulsive liar, really. Lies about things she doesn’t even need to lie about. She’s willing to hit herself hard enough to bruise and then try to make me look bad for it!”

Alan knew just what to say to make her sound insane and it seemed the harder she fought, the easier it was for him to entrap her. Graham knew the truth though. She knew he did. He just wasn’t willing to risk his promotion to help her. Or maybe some archaic part of him felt it was justified to hit a woman to keep her in line. No matter who she spoke to in the station, Alan always managed to show up and turn Michelle’s words against her. And that was that.

“Bring me my fucking bootlaces,” Alan growled down at Michelle, who was hunched on the floor, trembling as she attempted not to cry. Alan hated it when she cried. The consequences weren’t worth it.

Michelle listened to his heavy footfalls disappearing into the living room and waited a few moments before standing up. She walked steadily to the bathroom and cleaned the blood off her face, purposefully avoiding her reflection in the mirror. Things just couldn’t get any worse.

 

***
 

That weekend, Michelle was tending to her plants, the only hobby she had that Alan hadn’t tried to destroy, when the phone rang. Something about it gave her a chill and she frowned, giving one final mist to her peace lily before heading to the phone. At first, she thought that maybe Alan had been injured in the line of duty, which upset her regardless of the fact that he was abusive. Some part of her still cared about the asshole. However, when she answered, the deep, gravelly voice that inhaled and then said, “Hey kid,” made the goosebumps stand up on her arm.

“Is that you, Blade?” Michelle whispered. If Blade was calling her, it could mean nothing good.

“Yep,” he said, trying to be as cheerful as possible. But she could tell he wasn’t happy. “I have some bad news, Michie. Your dad had a thing with his heart last night. He didn’t make it.”

“What?!”

Michelle slumped down to the floor and closed her eyes. Of course, she had known this was a possibility. He had been sick a long time and had lived a good, long life. But the news still shocked her deeply and a small well of grief began to pool in her eyes.

“I’m sorry, kid. I didn’t want you to get some bullshit call from the police. People who didn’t know or really care about him, you know? He was my best friend. He’d have wanted it this way.”

“Well…what do we do?” Michelle asked, totally distressed. “I’ve never planned a funeral.”

“Relax and take it easy, all right? The MC is taking care of everything. You don’t have to lift a finger. We’re going to have the funeral Tuesday. How does that sound?”

“Tuesday,” Michelle repeated, her tears falling silently down her face as she listened numbly to Blade’s comforting voice. “I think my husband has a work thing but I will be there.”

“All right,” Blade said, his deep voice reassuring. “I’ll come pick you up, all right? It’s kind of a private spot that people on four wheels would normally have a hard time getting to.”

Michelle smiled despite herself. Of course, it was.

“Okay,” she whispered. “Thanks.”

“Yup. You hang in there, all right? Everything’s going to be fine.”

Michelle hung up, the calm, soothing voice of Blade still echoing in her mind. Everything was going to be fine. As long as she could manage to get Alan’s approval to leave for the funeral, then yes, it would. The idea of him saying no made her breath catch in her throat and Michelle had to close her eyes to try to ward away the panic. Alan would say yes. He could be terrible but he was an honor-bound man. Blade was right. Everything would be fine.

Chapter 2

Blade grinned privately to himself as young blonde mothers with small blonde children, all dressed in ugly pastel colors and golden jewelry, eyed him with suspicion. He had loosened the muffler on his bike, a tradition at his MC that made funerals a festive occasion. It was a little like the way soldiers got a salute with guns. Warriors of the MC got sent off with the pure sound of their bikes. It was beautiful, in a way.

But these suburban housewives clearly thought that it was rude for a dirty biker to be coming out this way and he wound through the obnoxious streets of the little stuck-up neighborhood, sensing the women’s eyes glued upon him. They were either waiting to see where he was going so they could file an official complaint against the neighbor who was bringing in such a trashy element, or they were drinking him in, their repressed little housewife hearts atwitter with the freedom a man like Blade represented.

He laughed out loud to himself as he finally found the driveway of Michie’s house. He dismounted the motorcycle and strutted to the front porch, scowling at the ugly welcome mat and the golden trim of the doorbell. Who would have thought the daughter of the most sensible man he’d ever known would grow up to have such bad taste?

“Blade!”

All of the thoughts were driven out of his head when she opened the door. He was shocked by the beautiful woman standing before him. He hadn’t seen Michie since she was a young girl, before she went off to live with her mother and apparently became brainwashed by this yuppie suburbia. He had to tear his thoughts away and fight hard against the attraction he felt when Michelle threw her arms around him and began crying against his chest.

“Hey, it’s going to be fine, kid,” he said, suddenly remembering what he was there for. Zeke had died, leaving his daughter practically an orphan. As far as he’d heard, Bernice had taken off with a man halfway across the world and never contacted Michie. It was a rough break for the girl. Always had been.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” Michelle said, pulling away and beaming up at him. Blade’s heart hammered unwelcomely. She was fucking flawless. He’d never seen a woman so captivating. Everything about her was perfect, except…

“What the hell happened to your face?” Blade growled, his eyes homing in on the deep gash that was healing above her eyebrow.

Michelle suddenly looked ashamed or scared, maybe, and shook her head.

“Nothing,” she laughed. “I’m fine.”

“Like hell! It looks like somebody beat the hell out of you!”

Michelle laughed unconvincingly. “You’ve always been so dramatic. Really, it’s nothing to be overprotective about.”

“Whatever,” Blade grumbled. It was going to be a long ride. He would have time to get the truth out of her.

“We should probably get going,” Michelle said, clearly anxious to change the subject.

If she thought that he was going to give up so easily though, she had another thing coming. Still, the girl was right. It was time to get out of there. The last thing he wanted was to be the cause of delay in the celebration of his best friend’s life.

“Yep,” Blade said, looking around at the over-the-top neighborhood and its small collection of nosey housewives with a nod. “Let’s get the hell out of here.”

 

***

 

The funeral was just as hard as Blade had expected it would be, but he was shocked by Michelle’s strength. It wasn’t that she was hiding her emotions; she cried as much as anybody. But she had proud eyes, and the tears that fell from them were justified and didn’t change the expression on her serious, beautiful face.

Still, Blade couldn’t keep his eyes from wandering back to the worrisome gash over her eyes. Something was going on and he knew already that he didn’t like what it was. Zeke had told him that the man his daughter married was a pig and a controlling one at that. Blade knew from experience that some men wearing the uniform allowed it to corrupt them and from what he’d heard, Michie’s husband didn’t like her associating with her family. He called Zeke a delinquent and swore that if he found out Michelle had been associating with them, he would want nothing to do with her.

At the reception, Blade decided it was time to confront Michelle about her injury again. She was laughing with the president of the MC about some of her father’s crazy antics, when Blade butted into the conversation.

“You see Michie’s shiner, there, Snake?” he asked, pointing at the gash on Michelle’s head. Since Blade had pointed it out, she had done her best to cover it up with makeup. Now Blade wondered what else she could possibly be hiding. Bruises? Come to think of it her cheek was a little swollen...or had she just been crying a lot?

“Shit, kid! What happened to you?!” Snake exclaimed.

“It’s a mystery, boss,” Blade said, staring at Michelle, who quickly clamped her mouth shut and looked away from the two older men staring her down.

Snake was about 60 but just as rough as ever. He caught Blade’s eye and Blade felt better immediately. He knew that Snake was going to help him get the truth out of her, no matter what it took.

“It’s really nothing. I’m just such a klutz.”

Nothing out of her mouth sounded true. In fact, Blade had seen Michelle as a child. She was one of the most graceful and athletic kids he’d ever met.

“Bullshit, Michie. Come on. Tell us what really happened. We’re here for you!”

Suddenly, the composure that Michelle seemed to have been holding for the funeral cracked and she dropped her head into her hands, her delicate shoulders quaking.

“Ah, hell,” Blade grumbled, grabbing Michelle into a warm bear hug. “Just let it all out, kid. I’ve got you.”

Snake shifted uncomfortably – it was rare that the MC was faced with the tears of a young damsel, after all – while Blade caressed her hair and looked at Snake over Michelle’s head. Whatever was going on was bad. He knew it in the pit of his stomach. And as Zeke’s best friend and successor as VP of the club, it was his job to prevent her from being hurt. By anyone.

Finally, Michelle took a deep, shuddering breath and pulled away from Blade’s arms, wiping her face with a handkerchief. Her tears helped to smudge away some of the makeup and Blade cringed.

“Shit!” Snake exclaimed. Her face was black and blue. Michelle sighed deeply.

“All right,” she said quietly. “I’ll talk. But not here.”

Blade nodded. As long as Michelle was going to tell him what was really going on, he’d have gone to the moon. He waited impatiently for the reception to finish. Whatever was happening with her, he was going to fix it. For Zeke.

Chapter 3

Michelle dreaded the end of the reception. It not only meant that she was going to be confronted by Blade, once again, about what had happened to her face, but she was also going to be doomed to go back home to Alan, who hadn’t agreed at all to let her attend her father’s funeral. He thought her father had been a good for nothing creep, a criminal with a cold heart, but she knew the truth. Her father was a better man than Alan would ever be.

“All right kid,” Blade said, standing beside Snake as they ushered the last of the guests outside of the reception hall. “Let’s hear it.”

Michelle sighed and gazed at the broad wooden building where the reception had been held. It was actually more like a huge cabin in the woods, beside a vast lake where she had spent her childhood daydreaming about the day she would finally have a life of her own. Michelle could remember going there as a child and enjoying every second of it. But that was before her father had been deemed an unfit parent (by her mother and eventually by the courts because of his involvement in the MC) and she had been forced into the city to live with a mother who was hardly there.

“Snake! We need you at the MC. Something’s going down with the Gremlins,” said one of the club members rushing back toward the hall.

“Those annoying little bastards,” Snake grumbled, pursing his lips apologetically at Michelle. “They sure chose the right name.”

“Thank you for everything,” Michelle said, hugging Snake tightly.

“Your father was a great man,” Snake said with a respectful nod. “He deserves the best.”

Suddenly it was just Michelle and Blade standing outside the cabin as twilight began to fall over the quiet forest. The loud rumble of motorcycle engines dispersed into the distance and Michelle took a wavering breath.

“What is it?” Blade asked, his handsome, weathered face concerned.

“Can we maybe go for a ride or something? I don’t feel comfortable talking here.”

“Sure,” Blade said, walking to his bike. Michelle watched him, her eyes taking in Blade’s broad, muscular body, and his long salt-and-pepper hair, tied behind his head. He had dressed up in his best leather for the event, a jacket she had seen only one other time in her life, when attending Snake’s daughter’s wedding.

Blade turned, his blue eyes piercing through her. This wasn’t the kind of person who liked playing games or beating around the bush. He was a man through and through, and the thought sent a forbidden thrill coursing through Michelle’s body. He was strong, protective, loyal, and of course, stupidly handsome. What would Blade do if he found out the truth about Alan? She didn’t want Blade to get in trouble with the police. Not for her sake.

“Let’s go, kid.”

“I’m not a kid anymore,” Michelle said with a laugh, trying to push the thoughts away. Yes, Blade was handsome. But he was also 45 years old. A 20-year age gap was just creepy. What was she thinking?

“Whatever,” Blade said, laughing softly and mounting his bike. “Where are we off to?”

“The docks,” Michelle decided. “I want to see the world the way I used to before I’m forced to go back.”

“Hm…”

Blade considered this for a moment and waited for Michelle to mount the motorcycle. The feeling of his warm, strong body pressed so closely against hers sent a thrill coursing all throughout her, to the point where she dropped her hand from his shoulders in an effort to make it stop. Blade caught her eye from the rearview mirror and all she saw in his rugged reflection was concern. She would have to tell him the truth. He would demand nothing less, no matter what the cost to her, or to Alan, might be.

“Here we are, Michie,” Blade said, false cheerfulness in his tone. He was trying to lighten the mood, to treat her like a happy, oblivious little kid. As if her home life wasn’t in shambles and her father hadn’t just died. It was insulting in a way. But at the same time, she was grateful. He was trying to act like everything was normal- as if things really were going to be all right. But she saw no way that could possibly be the case.

“Thanks,” Michelle said, avoiding Blade’s eyes as he helped her off the bike. His strong hand engulfed her own entirely and she had to fight another forbidden sensation of longing away. It was absurd. She had never felt this strongly toward anybody before. Not even her own husband. It was probably just the grief getting to her. She shouldn’t pay those feelings any mind.

They walked silently to the docks, where the sun was just beginning to set off in the horizon. It was absolutely beautiful and both were lost in their own thoughts for a few moments as they watched the sky begin to change colors, from light blue to vibrant pinks and oranges. It would be like this for about another half an hour, and then they would be left in the dark.

“Want to sit down?” Blade asked, leading Michelle to a makeshift bench at the end of the dock. It was all so familiar. She remembered when the wood had been new. Now it was aged and had suffered the elements. It looked all the more charming for it, really.

“Thank you,” Michelle said, sitting down quietly. It was nice to have a few moments of peace, without the hum of conversation in the air, or the prospect of Alan coming home angry hovering over her shoulders. Sure, he would be angry when she went back that night. There was no avoiding it. He hadn’t wanted her to pay her respects to her father. Michelle had been wrong about him. The other half of her tooth had been knocked out of place when she had insisted she go and she was afraid of what might happen when she finally returned to a husband who had been defied.

“So are you going to tell me what happened to that pretty face of yours or are you going to make me guess?” Blade finally asked, sitting down on the bench beside her.

Michelle closed her eyes, trying to ignore the hot tears that were welling up inside of them once again. It was odd; it was her father’s funeral, but she felt like she was crying just as much about the idea of going back home to her husband after having one more intoxicating taste of the life she used to have.

“It’s just hard to talk about,” Michelle said, her voice hushed. In truth, she had never spoken of Alan’s abuse in depth. Not once in their six years of marriage, especially after the way the people at the police station had received her.

“My husband,” Michelle finally whispered. “He hurts me.”

It had started out innocently enough, with apologies and vows to be a better man, but as time wore on, he forgot that he was the one doing wrong and blamed every little problem in his life on Michelle. She wasn’t sure where she could turn.

“That son of a bitch!” Blade growled, getting to his feet immediately. “I’ll tear his dick off!”

“Please,” Michelle said, reaching out to touch Blade’s arm. Every muscle in it was flexed as if he were ready to go in for the kill. It was touching in a way. And sexy. “That’s not helping.”

“Not yet,” Blade growled. But he sat back down beside Michelle and grew quiet, allowing her to speak once again.

“It’s happened for a long time,” Michelle said. “I tried to file a report about it but the police just think I’m Alan’s crazy wife. They either don’t believe a word out of my mouth or they just don’t care. They look out for themselves and each other. Like it’s some kind of club, and not a group of men trusted to protect and serve those who are wronged.”

“Sick little fucks,” Blade grumbled, shaking his head in disgust. “They don’t know what real power is, so they make it up for themselves. Haven’t you tried to leave? The guy just isn’t worth it!”

“I tried to run away once,“ Michelle admitted. “But Alan found me right away. He’s everywhere. He probably knows exactly what I’m doing right now. I don’t know what all he’s got bugged. The only reason he’s not here right now is because he knows the MC is dangerous. He needs to make sure he’s safe and protected, you know?”

Blade scoffed, but nodded. “I get you, kid. So you’re stuck.”

“I’m very stuck,” Michelle said, taking in another wavering breath. She had thought it would be torturous to speak about Alan’s abuse. It had been nearly impossible with the men at the police station, but sitting on the dock in the peaceful twilight with Blade, it actually felt good to get it off her chest. Comforting.

“Why did you ever marry a prick like that in the first place?” Blade asked, chuckling humorlessly. “Did he put on a good show?”

“Yeah,” Michelle said, a little smile on her lips. Alan had been so charming at first. He appeared to be everything she had ever wanted in a partner. He was driven and dedicated and generous…but it had all been an act to lure her in.

“Well you’ve got to be careful with guys, Michie. Go for the ones who don’t beat around the bush. Who refuse to bullshit. To an honorable man, that’s a fuckin’ philosophy! They’d rather die than lie to a woman, let alone put hands on her! Leave that piece of shit and find someone who always tells the truth.”

“Like you?” Michelle asked, half-teasing. “I know it takes a huge python tattoo like yours down the arm to inform me that I’ve picked a winner.”

The tattoo was actually pretty sexy though and she wished she hadn’t brought attention to it. Blade’s sparkling blue eyes caught hers and he grinned, but said nothing.

“I wish I’d never married him,” Michelle admitted suddenly. “I’m afraid to go home.”

“Well, you don’t have to worry about that anymore,” Blade said decidedly, standing up and offering Michelle his hand.

“What do you mean?” Michelle asked, furrowing her eyebrows in confusion and taking Blade’s hand.

“Like hell I’m going to take you home after everything you told me!”

“Well where are we going then?” Michelle asked, her heart filling with fear. If she didn’t return back to Alan, she would be in serious trouble.

“You’re coming with me. Back to the MC. It was your home once and it will be your home again.”

Michelle’s eyes widened. The MC! Alan would never step foot there. They were the only men strong enough, with a tense enough history with the police department that Michelle would be safe with. Why hadn’t she thought of that before?

“Unless…you have a problem with that?” Blade said, his face sparkling. She knew that even if she did have a problem with that, Blade would get his way sooner or later. It would save them both some time to just submit now.

“No,” Michelle said, relief flooding her breast for the first time in years. “It’s no problem at all.”

Chapter 4

When Blade burst through the doorway of the MC, all chatter died down and all eyes turned to Michelle, who walked meekly in behind him.

“Everybody, Michelle’s had a hard break and she’s going to be staying with us for a while. No fuckin’ funny stuff with her, I swear to God or you’ll pay! This is Zeke’s little girl, you got it?!”

The room was suddenly alive with activity as the bikers lounging about the bar raised their glasses and cheered, shouting welcomes to Michelle, who acknowledged them wearily.

“Come on, kid. I’ll show you to your room.”

Michelle seemed relieved to hear this and followed Blade up a long, winding staircase that Michelle remembered fondly and down a long hallway to the door in the back.

“Snake and his old lady moved out of here ages ago, so we have a room vacant. The rest of the guys have their own places. It was just your dad and me who lived up here at the end. I’m going to miss him.”

Blade cleared his throat. It was hard to be emotional about a thing like this, but he and Zeke had known each other since they were shithead teenagers, causing trouble down in town. It had been awe-inspiring for them to meet Snake, 15 years older than them and goal-oriented. The man was downright organized and it took no time at all for the three of them to get the most well-respected MC in the area started: The Pythons.

“I’m going to miss him, too.”

“You know, he talked about you all the time. You were his pride and joy,” Blade said, remembering his conversations with Zeke fondly. It made him feel a little bit misty-eyed though and he cleared his throat quickly. “When you’re ready, I’ll have you go through his things. His room is the same one it’s always been. Everything in Snake’s old room should be fresh and clean but I’ll bring in new sheets just in case. You never know with these fuckin’ animals.”

Michelle blushed and looked down at the ground and Blade cringed. He always managed to say too much. But to his surprise, Michelle laughed.

“I appreciate it,” she said, finally looking back up at him. Blade was caught in her eyes, she looked neither like her father nor her mother. She was completely unique. Her eyes were a dazzling emerald, with flecks of gold that seemed to dance when she smiled, and her auburn hair cascaded in waves down her back as if she were some kind of supermodel or something. It was ridiculous.

“Well, whatever we can do for you, we’re going to do it. Not just for you, but for Zeke. It’s what he would have wanted.”

Michelle looked down at the ground again. This time Blade knew he’d struck a nerve. Maybe he should just let the poor girl get settled in before trying to run his damn mouth at her.

“Blade?”

Blade paused as he turned away from her and looked over his shoulder just in time to catch her eye.

“Yeah, kid?”

“Thank you,” she said, her beautiful gaze boring into his and making him feel frozen in place, right there in the fuckin’ hallway. “I really appreciate everything you’re doing.”

“Don’t mention it,” he managed to say and walked briskly down the hall.

***
 

That night, Blade laid awake, anger burning in his chest. What kind of good for nothing so-called man laid his hands on a woman? Let alone a beautiful, delicate little rose like Michie? He had half a mind to leave right then and there to take care of the piece of shit once and for all.

But he wasn’t safe outside of MC turf. The relationship that the bikers had with the local police department was a rocky one and if either was caught outside of their turf, everybody knew what would happen. The pigs would get slaughtered, and the bikers would get tazed, cuffed, and thrown in the slammer without any real charges to file against them. Needless to say, there was a lot of tension between the two organizations.

The MC did its best to operate outside the law but that could only happen if both groups respected the line in the sand. Speeding into suburbia to pummel a rogue, woman-beating cop would definitely get him into some hot water. He was going to have to play it smart, especially if he wanted to stick around long enough to make sure that Michelle got back on her feet. He owed it to her, for her father’s sake.

When Blade finally managed to fall asleep that night, his dreams were haunted by images of Zeke, telling him to keep his daughter safe. Those dreams ended eventually and paved the way for dreams that he would rather die than to let into his mind. Dreams of Michelle lying beside him in his own bed, half naked and grinning at him; her perfect body just barely revealed to him beneath the satiny sheets.

Blade woke up in a cold sweat, furious at himself.

“Get a fuckin’ life, you pervert!” he hissed to himself in the mirror when he got up to relieve himself. The past few days had been unbelievable. He was probably just coping with his grief in a shitty way.

“Blade, what are you doing up?” Jackal asked, drying one of the big beer glasses from behind the bar. Many of the men in the MC had left and gone home for the night, leaving only a few stragglers too drunk to make the trip back home.

“Couldn’t sleep,” Blade grunted, sitting heavily at one of the bar stools. “Give me the hardest thing we’ve got.”

“Of course,” Jackal said, sliding Blade a shot.

Blade took it quickly and felt the warmth of the liquor work its way inside of him. He couldn’t let himself get carried away. Michelle was vulnerable. She’d just lost her father. Having dirty old man thoughts right now was the last thing he should be doing. She was in trouble. She needed their help- Blade’s protection. How would he be able to perform properly if all he could think about was how sexy she was? Besides that, she was practically just a kid. It was wrong, pure and simple.

“I couldn’t sleep either,” Michelle said softly from behind him. Blade nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound of her voice, soft and almost sensual near his ear.

He turned to Michelle and raised an eyebrow. She had changed clothes, he noticed, and was wearing a black t-shirt with the Python’s logo on it. It was way too big on her and the way it dwarfed her body, falling lightly over her perfect breasts was maddening.

“Where’d you get the shirt?” Blade asked, tearing his eyes away and demanding another drink from Jackal.

“I found it in the room. It’s clean. I’m tired of wearing that dress.”

Blade nodded. He had never understood women’s fashion. What was the point in being uncomfortable all day just to look good? Still, he had never complained about seeing a good-looking woman flaunting her body.

“Don’t blame you for that,” Blade said, avoiding her eyes to take another shot. “Dresses never fit me right.”

Michelle was quiet for a moment before bursting out in a beautiful pale of laughter and Blade grinned at her. It was nice to see her smile. Really nice, actually. Her entire beautiful face was lit up brightly like fireworks on the Fourth of July.

“I’m sure you’d look better in a dress than I ever could,” Michelle said as her laughter died down. “I swear…”

“I doubt it,” Blade said darkly, uncomfortable about the way he was once again forced to remember the girl’s body. Was it really possible Michelle had no idea how attractive she was? It seemed like a sin.

“Listen,” Michelle said, sitting up in the bar stool beside Blade and sighing deeply.

“Uh oh,” Blade mumbled. “That’s a lecture breath.”

Michelle laughed again and slapped his shoulder playfully. “Stop it! I’m trying to be serious.”

Blade raised his eyebrow and gestured for her to continue, and Michelle rolled her eyes at him. Why was it so much fun speaking to this girl? Shouldn’t they both be in their own rooms right now, stuck in an endless cycle of grief? It would almost make him feel better to be crying over Zeke right now as opposed to practically flirting with his best friend’s child. It was wrong.

“I just kept listening for you to get up and, I don’t know, go teach Alan a lesson or something,” Michelle finally said miserably. She had washed all her makeup off sometime during the night, so her face, no matter how radiant, still looked battered. Just hearing Alan’s name made him furious all over again.

“What’s wrong with teaching that piece of shit a lesson?” Blake growled.

“I just don’t think I could live with myself if anything happened to you…on my account,” Michelle said quietly. “It was keeping me up all night, worrying that you were going to do something rash that might ruin your life or affect the MC.”

“Trust me, sweetheart, I wouldn’t do anything to negatively impact the MC. Not even on your account.”

Michelle seemed both relieved and maybe a little offended, and sighed. “Good. I don’t want you to confront Alan about this. He’s the chief of police, you know? It could go down badly for you if you tried to say or do anything.”

“That stupid bastard is the chief?” Blade exclaimed. “What the hell?”

Michelle laughed again and shook her head. “I know. It’s fucked up.”

“It’s a little more than fucked up, kid. The more you tell me the harder it is for me to stay put!”

When Blade saw Michelle’s face fall, he sighed heavily. “But don’t worry. I’m not going to do anything rash. I’m not as stupid as I look.”

“You don’t look stupid,” Michelle said, her intoxicating eyes serious upon him.

“That’s beside the point,” Blade laughed, trying to shake off the intensity of his attraction toward her. She was a young woman. Married to the chief of the pigs, no less. And his best friend’s daughter. How much more trouble could he ask for? He couldn’t find more if he was looking for it!

“I’m serious though,” Michelle said. “I’m worried about you. I don’t think I could handle it if I lost another person in my life…except maybe Alan.”

“Don’t worry about a thing, sweetheart. You just stay put here and nobody would dare touch you. Even if Alan knew right where you were, you know those chicken shit police aren’t going to do anything about it. They mind their own affairs and we keep to ourselves. It’s the way it is.”

“I don’t know,” Michelle sighed. “I just have a bad feeling about this.”

Blade put his hand over Michelle’s and smiled as soothingly as he could muster.

“Nothing is going to happen to you, Michie. Not while I’m around.”

Michelle searched his eyes and he grinned again. It would be easier to make her laugh than it would to acknowledge that she cared for him, even if it was just leftover care from childhood. In fact, that kind of made it worse. It reminded him that he could just as easily be her dad. This feeling he had was sick, really. He would have to be careful with it.

Michelle shook her head and smiled.

“All right,” she finally said. “I trust you.”

Blade smiled painfully at her, secretly watching her as she got up from the stool and headed back upstairs to sleep. She trusted him. That meant that no matter what, he wouldn’t take advantage of that trust. He would treat her with nothing but the utmost respect and that would be the end of it.

Chapter 5

“Breakfast!”

Michelle sat up groggily, her heart lurching. Had she overslept? Alan liked to have his breakfast at 5am sharp, before he left for work.

But when she opened her eyes, the unfamiliar interior of what used to be Snake’s room jogged her memory. She hadn’t slept at home with Alan that night. She had stayed overnight at the MC, too terrified to go back home and face what would ultimately be the beating of her life.

“Come on, Sleeping Beauty!”

“I’m up,” Michelle called weakly. She was tired and a little bit embarrassed about facing the next day. Her father had been laid to rest and now, here she was, lingering in a club full of rowdy men and women. She wasn’t up for seeing too many people. But the MC had a shared kitchen and living space upstairs, and most of the usual patrons knew better than to disturb the VP in his quarters. It would probably be fine.

Michelle showered quickly and pulled on another fresh, white shirt pulled from the drawers at the MC. Snake had apparently left a lot of clothes behind when he’d moved, luckily for her. The idea of wearing the same dress every day was daunting. It was tied to the memories of her father’s funeral and to Alan. She’d just as soon burn it than wear it again.

“About time, kid,” Blade mumbled when Michelle walked into the kitchen, where the smell of pancakes and eggs wafted tantalizingly in the air. She’d forgotten what it was like to have someone cook for her. It was nice. Really nice.

“Come on then, don’t just stand there. Sit down and eat.”

Blade stood and pulled a chair out for her and Michelle sat down, looking down at the table in awe. It was the same hand-crafted wooden table that she remembered watching her father and Blade build together when she was just a little girl. The seats were the same orange chairs that looked like they belonged in a different time, though now they were worn with age. Still, they’d been treated well, and as she sat down in the seat, she closed her eyes at the familiar feeling of the soft cushion. She was home.

“So I thought today maybe we could go and get you some clothes, you know?” Blade said, striding to the refrigerator and bringing back a pitcher of orange juice. “That way you don’t have to keep wearing Snake’s old cast offs.”

“I don’t mind the cast offs,” Michelle said with a small laugh.

“Still, it would be better for you to have a few changes of clothes, you know?”

“Yeah,” Michelle said, watching Blade’s strong hands as he poured her a glass of orange juice. She felt warm inside suddenly and all of the anxiety she’d been feeling the night before, and the worry about disappointing Alan when she woke up, had melted away. She was where she belonged and she felt fucking good there. How could she have stayed away for so long?

“How did you sleep?” Blade asked, sitting down at the table across from her and digging into the food on his plate.

“I don’t know,” Michelle admitted. “It was really strange to wake up here. I thought…”

Blade stopped chewing for a moment and studied her closely. It made her feel nervous.

“It’s not important,” Michelle said with a small laugh. “It’s just strange.”

Blade nodded and resumed his meal. “It’s a big adjustment for sure,” he said. “It’s going to take some time for everybody. But I swear to god, the first guy who gets wise with you, you remember what your dad and I used to say.”

Michelle laughed.

“You told me to kick him in the dick and run,” she said. “But that never did me much good.”

“Right, because you forgot the last part. We told you to kick him in the dick and run upstairs so your dad or I could take care of the rest. You left home and got with a shitty guy, too far away from us to protect you. It’s not your fault that this bad shit happened to you but from now on you’re going to have to shape up and start making smart choices about the way you spend your time.”

Michelle looked sulkily down at her plate. It didn’t feel great to be lectured but she knew that Blade was right. She had to be better about looking out for herself from now on. It was important for everybody involved. If she didn’t and the MC had to risk its neck to protect her, then it could be seriously dangerous.

“Anyway, I have a bunch of business to tend to up here today, so I thought maybe you and Snake’s old lady could go to town together. She’s a tough broad, man. Keeps a switchblade up her sleeve. Don’t want to tick her off.”

Blade chuckled and shook his head and Michelle felt a twinge of nervousness.

“I thought you were going to come with me,” she said, her heart tremoring. Blade had promised to protect her. But how was he going to do that sitting all the way back at the MC while he had her run to town?

“You can’t live with this kind of fear in your life, kid,” Blade said, shaking his head. “Besides, shopping is girl stuff. I’m not going to know what to do with myself in there! Spare me.”

Michelle sighed nervously and Blade pursed his lips.

“Look, if it makes you feel any better, Snake’s old lady doesn’t go anywhere Snake ain’t there to protect her, you know what I mean? We take care of our women here. He’ll probably be out in the truck smokin’ a cigarette the whole time. Can’t get much safer than an escort by the president of the MC, you know what I’m saying?”

“Fine,” Michelle mumbled. Still, she was disappointed somehow. The idea of shopping with Blade had somehow gotten her hopes up. Spending the day with him, doing something as innocent as clothes shopping…it was adorably domestic in a way.

“Look, it’s going to be fine,” Blade assured her, smiling in that charming way he had that made her want to forget her troubles and laugh despite herself. “Jo is really good with that knife. And I think the two of you will get along pretty nicely.”

“All right,” Michelle sighed. She was done being irritated about it. “But I don’t have any money.”

Blade laughed heartily at the declaration and Michelle frowned.

“What?” she asked. “What’s so funny?”

“The thing about being a Python is you don’t need much money,” Blade said, stressing the sentence meaningfully. “The club’s got you. Jo will tell them how it is.”

“You mean we’re stealing?” Michelle asked, a little nauseated by the thought.

“Fuck no we’re not stealing,” Blade exclaimed, looking at her as if she were stupid. “It’s an exchange, princess. We take care of the riffraff coming through here that the cops ignore. You know, the real sleazebags. Organized crime lords trying to get all the little rebellious babies hooked on hard drugs. We get rid of them and the people in town take care of us. It’s an arrangement.”

Michelle considered this briefly. It was true. She had heard Alan speaking to his friends on several occasions about the money they received from the crime lords to overlook their shady activities in the area. He spoke in front of her about all kinds of horrible things, knowing that even if she tried to report him, he would be able to discredit her with a single word. It was infuriating. If the police couldn’t be counted on to protect the vulnerable people in the community, then the MC could. It gave her a sudden surge of pride and she smiled at Blade.

“When are we leaving?” she asked.

“As soon as you’re done with your damn breakfast,” Blade said. “Jo and Snake are waiting outside.”

Chapter 6

Blade watched Michelle leave and sighed heavily. It had been hard to see her so disappointed, but the last thing he wanted to do was go shopping for clothes when he had so much work to do. The dues were being collected that day and it was his job to make sure that every member of the MC paid and contributed their paperwork. It was just easier that way.

The work was tedious but it gave his mind a good escape from the haunting thoughts of Zeke and the frustrating attraction he felt toward his best friend’s daughter. It was probably just his grief creeping up on him. It was probably some sick game his mind was playing. He missed his buddy, and was trying to get close to him in any way he could. It would make sense why he would have such agonizing dreams about the girl. It didn’t have to mean anything.

Blade shook his head and sighed. He wasn’t going to let it get to him. There were more important things to worry about. He submerged himself in his work until Jackal poked his head into Blade’s office, gritting his teeth apologetically.

“Blade man, there’s someone on the phone. Says he’s looking for Michelle. I thought I’d ask you what the fuck to do about that.”

Blade groaned. “Send the call to me. I’ll take care of it.”

“Right,” Jackal said with a nod. When the office phone rang, Blade picked it up.

“Is this Alan?” he asked tersely.

“Yes, actually, it is Alan Waters, chief of the Glendale police department. To whom am I speaking, please?”

Blade grinned. “That doesn’t matter too much, little buddy.”

Alan laughed, an unpleasant, on-the-brink-of-insanity kind of sound, and Blade raised his eyebrow. He was dealing with a nutter.

“This is concerning my wife, so I think I have the right to know who I’m speaking to!”

“Actually, no woman, whether your wife or not, belongs to you. Your rights in this case are pretty limited, I would say.”

“If you don’t want to deal with the legal repercussions of withholding information from a police officer, by god, I’ll- “

“You’re not going to do anything, slick. You and your little sideshow aren’t going to step foot on Python turf, and you and I both know it.”

“Where the hell is Michelle?!” Alan demanded. “I have a right to know where my wife is at all times! She’s -”

“Listen boy,” Blade said. He’d had just about enough of listening to the piece of shit speaking. “All you need to know is that Michelle is safe and sound right where she belongs. Much safer than she would ever be with someone like you. They ought to lock you up and throw away the key.”

“If you don’t tell me where she is, you piece of shit, I’m coming over there myself!” Alan cried, his voice on the verge of hysteria.

“Whoo, I’d like to see you try. You’d be doing me a favor. See, I promised the little lady I’d go easy on you. Maybe delay justice a little bit longer and hope that karma does its job with you since she’d feel too upset if I did anything to get myself in harm’s way. But damn, you just solved both of our problems! When can I expect you?”

“Grah!” Alan growled. The phone slammed down and Blade chuckled. Some men just didn’t have it in them to fight and that was the sad truth. Those were the kinds of men who took their power in other ways. Like hitting innocent women and acting like the world wasn’t fair simply because they weren’t able to suck on their mama’s tit anymore.

Real men didn’t need coddling, and if Alan was telling the truth and he was going to try to come up to the MC to claim what he thought was his, then he was going to have another thing coming. And Blade would have the time of his life giving it to him.

***

“Blade!”

Michelle’s voice tore Blade out of the drab accounting booklets on his desk and he raised an eyebrow at her.

“What do you think?” Jo asked, following in the office behind Michelle. Jo held her arms out like a girl from a gameshow and presented Michelle in one of her new outfits. Michelle twirled and laughed, the most care-free he had seen her act since she’d arrived. He’d known sending her out with Jo would be a good idea. The old girl may have been about Blade’s age, but she knew how to have fun.

“It looks nice,” Blade said, smiling at Michelle. He looked back down at his papers quickly, practically able to feel the disappointment rolling from Michelle’s direction. He was nothing but a big let-down that day. But if he stared too long at her, then everybody in the room would know exactly what he was thinking. Michelle looked fucking incredible. The shirt she’d chosen was clinging to the lean muscles of her young body, awakening desires in him he’d thought had been long gone, dead and buried in fact. So why were they coming back now, of all times?

“Did you have fun?” Blade asked, before either of the women had a chance to confront him about his opinion.

Michelle’s face brightened again.

“Yeah, it was great! I haven’t had a day like that in a long time. No men, no rules…it was really amazing. Thank you, Jo!”

Michelle turned to Jo, who beamed and embraced her tightly.

“It’s no problem at all, honey. Any time you want to hang out with me, you just give me a call. It was great to finally meet you. Zeke talked about you like you were heaven on Earth.”

Michelle smiled sadly and left the room, carrying two huge shopping bags of clothes to put away.

“What the hell was that about?” Jo demanded.

Blade sighed.

“Here we go,” he mumbled.

“Damn right, here we go! That girl looked incredible! And here you are, all fatherly and polite, like, ‘that looks nice.’ The hell has gotten into you?”

Blade glared at Jo and her face suddenly broke out into a big smile.

“I get it!” She exclaimed. “I see what’s going on here! God, it’s so obvious!”

“Jo,” Blade warned. But the woman was already on the scent and he knew there was no way he would be able to get her off it again.

“You like her,” she said in a hushed whisper. Blade cringed and shook his head emphatically.

“She’s my best friend’s kid! That’s wicked wrong!” he growled.

“Blade, it’s perfectly normal! Nothing to be ashamed of. Human nature, after all. Your protective instincts kicking in, a sexy young woman all up in your business. Don’t be embarrassed!”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Blade snapped. He was holding onto his temper by a thread. The only reason he didn’t tear her a new one was because if he did, there was a chance Michelle might overhear.

“Whatever you say, man,” Jo said, chuckling to herself. “I’ll keep your secret. For now. But you mark my words, there will come a time for you to be honest with yourself. And when that day comes, you should know now that you have my blessing. She’s a sweet girl.”

Blade’s hands trembled with rage. He could have strangled Jo, speaking of things that weren’t her business to speak of.

“I don’t need your blessing!” Blade spat. “If I needed anybody’s blessing, it would be Zeke’s. I’m not going to be some creepy old man running after a younger woman like that! She’s my best friend’s daughter, Jo. Don’t be gross.”

“Right,” Jo said, backing out of the room. “Well you’re 45, not an old man. Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

“Get out of here! Can’t you see I’m busy?”

Jo grinned and closed the door, leaving Blade feeling more riled than he had been since the phone call with Alan earlier that day. Why wouldn’t anybody let him have some peace?!

He got back to work, muttering under his breath about how nosy Jo was. But in a way, it did make him feel a little bit better. She had said that his feelings were natural. He didn’t know how other people might feel about the situation but it was nice to have an opinion on the table besides his own. Maybe it wasn’t the end of the world if he was attracted to Michelle. The worst thing in the world, he decided, would be to act on it.

Chapter 7

Michelle woke up early the next day, feeling more refreshed and optimistic than she had since she was a child. It had done her wonders to be away from Alan, even just for a few hours, among people who treated her like a person, not like an indentured servant. She had almost forgotten that other people could be kind and caring. She’d come to expect everybody to treat her as poorly as Alan had.

Again, she heard a soft knock on the bedroom door and Blade’s deep, soothing voice summoning her to breakfast.

“Coming,” she said. She hopped in the shower, re-playing the events of the day before. Jo had been thrilled to take her out for an afternoon on the town, lavishing her with a delicious meal in the diner that Michelle’s father used to frequent, and joyously offering her opinion on clothing and everything else under the sun.

Jo was a kind, free-spirited woman with a foul mouth and a golden heart. A rare breed, especially in a place like the suburban neighborhood that Alan had insisted they move to. Michelle had had enough of fake people in her life. It was refreshing to be around these honest, outspoken people again. They felt like family.

When she emerged, Blade was already sitting in the kitchen and he smiled quickly at her.

“Thought maybe sausage and biscuits would suit the day more,” he said, taking a sip of his coffee.

“It looks incredible,” Michelle said, taking her seat. He didn’t stand up to greet her today, or to pull the chair out for her. Although she didn’t expect that kind of treatment, it seemed odd, somehow. As if he were forcing himself not to be overly polite.

“It’s my grandmother’s recipe. Don’t tell me if you don’t like it or she’ll probably roll around in her grave.”

Blade was going to laugh, but then a serious, pained look creased his chiseled features.

“Death is hard,” Michelle said, reaching across the table and gripping his hand. They sat like that for a moment before Blade cleared his throat and pulled his hand away quickly.

“We get used to doing hard things,” Blade said, shoveling a big forkful of biscuit into his mouth. “It’s what makes humans such amazing creatures. At least, the ones who are willing to own up to their own bullshit.”

Michelle nodded. She couldn’t see Alan ever getting used to doing something he didn’t want to do. In fact, he was a spoiled brat, and would rather destroy something than fail at it. Like that time with the puzzle she had gotten him for Christmas…that had been a disaster.

They ate the rest of their meal in silence and were just about to get ready to clean up when a commotion downstairs brought Blade to his feet.

“I demand to see her!” Alan was shouting. “I need to see my wife!”

Michelle grew faint at the sound of his voice and Blade scowled.

“You stay up here, kid,” he said darkly. “I’ll handle this.”

Michelle trembled and put her head in her hands. She had been stupid enough to think that she would be safe from Alan here at the MC. But, of course, he would get the entire police station to raid the place. That was the kind of asshole he was. She shouldn’t have let herself get comfortable here. She was going to pay dearly for the two days of freedom she had indulged in. Michelle swallowed hard, her hands shaking fiercely with terror. Why had she agreed to go to her father’s funeral?

“What do you think you’re doing, little man?” Blade shouted. “If you know what’s good for you, you’re going to get the hell out of here!”

Michelle cringed, but she knew she couldn’t let Blade fight her battles. She would just go home with Alan and pretend the whole thing had never happened.

“I just…I need to know that she’s all right!” Alan said desperately. “I want to see her.”

“You’re not going to see anything ever again, where you’re going,” Blade threatened.

“Stop!” Michelle cried.

“Aw hell, Michie! I told you to stay upstairs!”

Michelle descended the staircase quickly and looked Alan squarely in the eyes.

“Alan, you need to leave. These men are going to hurt you if you don’t.”

She backed away from Alan and raised her voice so that everybody in the MC could hear her.

“I don’t want any of you laying a hand on my husband. Do you understand me?!”

“Michie!”

She glared sternly at Blade, who clamped his mouth shut unhappily. She was doing it to protect them. If any of them laid a hand on the chief of police, it would be the end of the line for them all.

“Leave, Alan,” Michelle warned.

“Come with me!” Alan exclaimed. “You belong with me! Not in this bar full of pathetic thugs!”

“Listen to what I’m saying to you,” Michelle said, her voice quavering. “I am going to file for divorce. I’m not your wife, Alan. I’m nothing to you. And I’m not coming home. Now you can be a man about this and respect my wishes, or you can be a coward. But I have to tell you, the men in here don’t think too highly of cowards. It would take a lot more than my pretty words to hold them off if they set their mind to something.”

Alan glowered, looking helplessly around the room for some way he might gain the upper hand. Even if he had every squad car in the city outside the MC, he had no grounds to take her away and he knew it. He had come here as a spoiled brat wanting to take back what he thought was his, but now that she had challenged him, he would feel that his manhood was on the line. Was he going to act like a spoiled little bitch in front of an entire gang of bikers? Even Alan wasn’t that stupid.

“You’re all going to pay for this,” Alan said, his voice quavering. He didn’t look at any of the bikers. He was talking only to Michelle. She was going to be the one he punished. He probably didn’t give a damn about the MC, as long as he was able to put his wife in his place.

Alan turned away from her and stomped out the door and Michelle sank back against the wall, sighing heavily. He had been ballsy to come in there and try to order these men around like that, but that only served to show what a fucking lunatic he was.

“Are you all right, Michie?”

Blade’s strong, comforting voice suddenly enveloped her and she felt her body become weightless as Blade’s well-muscled arms scooped her up against his broad chest. She was carried up the stairs and laid down gently in the nearest bed, in Blade’s bed, and a cool cloth was applied to her forehead.

“It’s going to be fine,” Blade whispered, his voice deep and soothing in the cool, darkness of the bedroom. It smelled like him, and Michelle suddenly had the urge to hold him close, or be held by him, and never let go again.

 

***
 

Michelle woke up with a start. She hadn’t realized that she’d fallen asleep and panic welled inside of her. She had been dreaming that she was falling down a long, spiraling hole, with no end in sight. It was exactly the way she had always felt with Alan.

“That little slime ball really did a number on you, didn’t he?”

She was surprised by the deep rumble of Blade’s voice in the darkness.

“Could I have some water, please?” she asked. She didn’t want to answer the question, to acknowledge all of the ways that Alan had harmed her over the years. Some things he’d done might never stop hurting her, really. It would be impossible for her to feel like she once was.

“Of course,” Blade said, moving quietly through the room. A few moments later he returned to her side with a glass of cool water and she sipped it gratefully.

“What happened?” Michelle asked. She had fainted a few times before but usually only after a beating. This time had been different. Unnerving.

“I reckon you weren’t quite ready to see that ugly mug of his again,” Blade said with a wry chuckle. “Decided to go and pass out on us so you wouldn’t have to look at it anymore.”

Michelle laughed weakly.

“That’s a very scientific theory,” she said.

“Hey, they call me Blade, not Beaker,” he said, laughing quietly.

They were quiet for a moment and Michelle took the opportunity to study Blade’s form in the darkness. He was so well put together. Everything in the room was neat and organized. Even his beard was trimmed meticulously. The man knew how to take care of himself. And, apparently, he knew how to take care of her, too.

“Do you think he’ll come back?” Michelle asked. She couldn’t bear the thought of leaving the MC again. Especially not now that she had just started feeling comfortable here. The idea of going back with Alan made her feel nearly mad with apprehension.

“Nah,” Blade chuckled. “Not if he values his life. Did you see his face?!”

Michelle laughed despite herself. Alan had always been quite the coward. He liked to pretend he was a big bad alpha male, but when it came down to it, he was just an insecure little boy. At first it had been a quality that had endeared Alan to her, ironically enough. Now though, it had nearly been her end.

“I’m serious though. I don’t want any of you taking needless risks. You stay on your turf and he should stay on his. If anything happened to Alan because of me, they would crack down so hard on this place it would make your heads spin.”

Blade shrugged.

“We’ll see about that,” he said. “But it isn’t happening now, so don’t worry so much about it, got me? Just try to work on feeling better.”

He bent down and kissed her on the forehead, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. The soft warmth of his lips and the scraping of Blade’s mustache against her skin instantly set Michelle ablaze. The man was just trying to be fatherly, but somehow, the innocent little gesture had reminded her of just how much she had wanted Blade. From the moment she’d seen him standing on her porch to the moment he had stepped up for her against her husband, all she’d wanted to do was to feel more of the forbidden desires his body might have to offer.

“I should really get back to my own room,” she said quickly, locking eyes with Blade. His eyes were dark, almost tortured. Or maybe she was imagining it.

“Right,” he said, moving out of the way so that she could stand up from his bed.

She didn’t want to leave. The masculine smell of the room, the smell of Blade himself, was tantalizingly comforting. It was like being in front of a campfire on a warm summer day. But she couldn’t be trusted with her feelings. If she allowed herself to be drawn in, they would both regret it. Not only was she married, but it was a horrific thought to be so drawn to her father’s best friend. The man was far, far older than she was. It just wasn’t right. In fact, her father would probably be furious at the both of them for it.

Besides, there was no way that Blade was interested in her. He had known her since she was a child. All she would ever be was a kid to him. How would he ever see her as a grown woman? It wouldn’t work. It was all just too creepy to even consider.

“Do you want me to walk you to your room?” Blade asked, his voice tight with concern. “I could bring you some dinner, if you want.”

“No, it’s all right,” Michelle said quietly. “I’m feeling much better. Thank you though.”

She swallowed hard. She would just have to work harder to fight her feelings for Blade, that was all. She couldn’t let the grief win out. There was no way that she would ever be able to have a healthy relationship with Blade, was there? They were from two different worlds, and he would probably always see her as a child. It was time to accept it and put her crush behind her, once and for all.
 

Chapter 8

“Blade, you might want to come out here…”

Blade sighed and pushed his chair away from his desk.

“The hell are you interrupting me for? I’m almost done. Do you have any idea how goddamn drab doing this paperwork can be?”

Jackal shrugged and Blade continued grumbling as Jackal led him to the windows.

“Look outside,” Jackal said.

“Aw Christ!” Blade growled. “What the fuck!?”

Three police cars were parked outside the MC, each of them with their lights flashing red and blue. A small collection of bikers was gathered out front, smoking cigarettes and watching the cars suspiciously, but nobody seemed to dare to move, whether biker or cop.

“Should we go out there and see what they want?”

“Nah, ignore them. The stupid fuck trying to control Michie probably sent them here to try and psych us out. Don’t tell her about this.”

“Too late,” Jackal said, nodding out the window. Blade looked again and cursed loudly.

“That woman is going to be the fuckin death of me!”

Before Jackal could respond, Blade was tearing down the staircase after Michelle, who was strutting confidently through the group of bikers and heading toward the police cruisers.

“And just what in the hell do you think you’re doing?” Blade growled, gripping Michelle’s arm in his hand and pulling her back.

“I’m going to tell them to get the hell out of here and mind their own business!” Michelle exclaimed. “They’re really pushing it!”

“If you step foot near any of those fuckin’ cars, I swear to god…”

“Let go of me!” Michelle exclaimed, pulling her arm away from Blade. He suddenly felt foolish. What was he trying to do by manhandling her like that? It was a good way to get her riled up after the trauma she’d experienced with her loser husband.

“Look, I’m sorry. But if you go near them, those assholes are probably going to apprehend you or some shit.”

“I haven’t done anything wrong,” Michelle insisted. “They can’t take me for anything.”

Blade raised an eyebrow at her and Michelle’s fire wavered.

“You know as well as I do how crooked these shitheads can be. Why don’t we just go back inside and pretend that they’re not even here. What we’re doing right now isn’t going to help anything. It’s just giving them a shit show to laugh about. It would be far crueler to bore them to death, don’t you think?”

Michelle’s chin jutted defiantly toward the cruisers and Blade sighed. He wasn’t getting through to her. The woman was livid and she had every right to be.

“You know that Alan jerk is probably just sending a few of his friends to keep tabs on you and look out for anything they can try to use against us in court. They’re sneaky bastards. They know that if they stepped foot outside of their little cars, they’d be torn apart for daring to show their faces here. Otherwise they would have come out and grabbed you by now, brought you back to your husband kicking and screaming. They don’t care about you!”

Michelle’s shoulders grew heavy and she turned to face Blade, her features deflated and sad.

“I know they don’t care about me. Do you know how many times I’ve tried to report Alan to the guy in the middle car? He just takes my statement and then brings Alan in so they can make fun of how hysterical and insane I am.”

“They’re all going to pay for this, kid, but we have to give it some time. We’re working out a way to extract you from that guy’s grip completely. Trust me. The MC is powerful. We know a suit or two. But it’s going to be a process, all right?”

Michelle furrowed her brow but nodded, scowling at the ground.

“Let’s get the hell inside so they get their filthy eyes off you. They don’t know how lucky they are I don’t give them what they have coming right now.”

Michelle sighed and leaned against Blade’s shoulder as he led her inside. It felt like the most natural thing in the world for them to do and Blade swallowed hard. Why was it so damn easy for him to feel this way? This was a young girl, half his age. His friend’s child! He was practically like an uncle, right?

No, Blade realized. Actually, he had only seen Michelle a handful of times when she was young. Mostly he had been busy trying to find his feet, traveling the countryside on his bike and seeing all there was to see. He heard bits and pieces about her, enough to know a few little things, and had been there on some special occasions, like birthdays.

Yes, he had seen the girl a few times when she was a child, but mostly he’d heard about her. He wasn’t an uncle so much as an impartial observer in her life. Truth was, he was uncomfortable around children and preferred adult conversation.

The thought made him feel a little bit better as he led Michelle up the stairs, unable to tear his eyes away from the form-fitting skirt and blouse Jo had picked out for her. The woman may well be a goddess for all Blade was concerned, and when you messed with a goddess, the universe had a way of putting you in your place.

“All right then,” Blade said once they reached the common room upstairs. He led Michelle to the couch and they sat down together. “Let’s talk some sense. I know you’re worried, but I’ve got a plan here that will make sure that you’re safe. All right? You listening?”

Michelle nodded glumly and Blade cleared his throat.

“I didn’t want to tell you because I thought it would get your hopes up and we’re not sure whether it’s a sure thing or not, but I have a friend who’s a lawyer. He lives in California, we met when I was traveling the countryside in my 20s.”

“It’s hard to imagine you in your 20s,” Michelle said with a quiet laugh.

Blade pursed his lips at her. “Watch it, kid.”

Michelle’s eyes danced and once again he was trapped within them, a slave to his agonizing desires, but he was able to fight through it and get his mind back on track.

“What kind of lawyer is your friend?” Michelle asked.

“He’s mostly into business law, but he knows quite a few people who could help out in a situation like this. Get the divorce papers arranged and notarized quickly. And, probably, get you the majority of this piece of shit’s money.”

Michelle exhaled in disbelief. “That sounds impossible.”

“It’s not,” Blade said, looking seriously into her eyes. “You’re just too used to bad things happening. But you’re with me now. Try to have some faith in the MC. We’re here for you.”

Michelle shook her head and fell back against the couch, looking up at the ceiling with tears in her beautiful eyes.

“I can’t believe any of this is actually happening,” she whispered. “It’s all felt like such a nightmare. This is the first time I’ve felt safe since I was a kid.”

“Bikers tend to have that effect on people,” Blade teased. “At least, the people that they like.”

Michelle laughed and sat up, peering into Blade’s eyes. She put her soft, gentle hand over his and squeezed it.

“Thank you for everything,” she said, her face radiant with gratitude. “I think you might very well be saving my life.”

Blade swallowed hard and shook his head. “That’s a bit of an exaggeration, I think. But you can always count on the MC. I know Alan probably had his own idea about things, but he’s about to find out just how wrong he’s been.”

The two studied each other and the air between them seemed to crackle with life. Blade had waited all his life to meet a woman who could put him under her spell, but nowhere, in all of the country, did he find a person like that. Not until he saw Michelle. It was wrong. He knew it was wrong. She probably didn’t even feel the same way about him.

But the energy between them was impossible to deny. The thought that maybe, just maybe, she might reciprocate these intense feelings, was enough to inspire the man in him to act. He shoved away all thoughts of right and wrong, and surrendered to the moment. And the moment was fucking sweet.

Michelle gasped in surprise and pleasure as Blade’s mouth suddenly pressed against hers, and he felt her body surrendering beneath his touch. He gripped her close to him, the feeling of her breasts pressed firmly against his torso sending a wave of fire to his loins. She moaned when she felt the hard mound of his cock against her, and they broke away from the kiss, both of them breathing heavily.

“Fuck,” Blade said, cringing. Zeke was probably rolling over in his grave right about now. “I’m sorry.”

He stood up quickly from the couch and retreated from the room, leaving Michelle, gasping and hot, behind him.

Chapter 9

Michelle’s entire body was trembling after the brief rapture of the kiss, and she felt like if she stood up now, she would just end up falling over.

She put her head in her hands and closed her eyes, replaying the overpowering ecstasy of Blade’s lips – his entire body – again and again. But when she opened her eyes again, tempted to follow him into his bedroom, she felt suddenly sick inside. Wasn’t it wrong of her to be feeling like this? The man was twice her age. Her father’s friend.

And even if those things weren’t important factors, wouldn’t it be impossible to overlook the fact that she was getting a divorce? What if she was just feeling vulnerable and using Blade as a rebound? And who was to say he was going to take Michelle seriously anyway? Wasn’t her father always saying how Blade wasn’t the type to settle down? He was a man who was always looking for his roots, her father had said. And that was why he was gone most of the time she was growing up.

Finally, Michelle steadied her breathing enough to walk shakily back to her own bedroom. She sat down on the bed, unsure of whether to smile or cry. This whole thing was a complete disaster. The police were sitting outside, just waiting for her, or anybody at the MC, to fuck up, and she was just making matters worse. She was giving in to the forbidden feelings she had been feeling toward Blade ever since he had shown up on her doorstep. There were so many reasons why this was wrong. She couldn’t just succumb to something that would ultimately turn out to be another horrible mistake. The last thing Michelle could live with was another life like the one she’d had with Alan. Enough was enough.

Michelle sighed and opened the drawer in her end table, taking out the small slip of paper that Jo had scribbled her phone number onto. She swallowed nervously, then used the big rotary phone down the hall to dial. Jo picked up on the first ring.

“Yes?” she asked tersely. “You’re interrupting my shows.”

“Sorry,” Michelle said. She was about to hang up, when Jo’s voice lightened up.

“Oh, it’s you! How are you, honey?” Jo didn’t wait for a reply before she continued speaking. “You would love this – there’s a woman who can’t decide between her ex and her sister’s husband. It’s drama central!”

“That sounds interesting,” Michelle said, chuckling despite herself. She probably would never choose to watch a show like that on her own, but she was sure that watching it with Jo would make it even more entertaining.

“You should come over!” Jo exclaimed. “Jackal called over here a while ago talking about the damn cop cars outside the MC. It’s quiet here. Snake and I could pick you up out back if you’d like a break.”

“Actually, that sounds amazing,” Michelle said, grateful beyond words for the option to leave. If she had to face Blade again, she didn’t know what she would do. It was better to be safe.

“Great! Snake will be there in about 10 minutes. I think I’ll stay here so I can catch you up on what’s going on.”

Michelle laughed. “That sounds perfect.”

Michelle hung up, debating whether or not she should risk going to tell Blade that she was leaving. He would definitely freak out if she just disappeared, especially with the cops waiting outside the MC, but she just couldn’t bring herself to face him again.

She grabbed her jacket and packed a bag with a change of clothes in it, just in case Jo decided it would be fun for her to stay the night, and then headed downstairs to the bar area.

“Jackal!” she hissed.

He frowned before he realized who was calling him and then sat down the glass he was drying and came over to her.

“What’s up, kiddo?”

“Could you let Blade know that Snake is picking me up? Jo wanted to hang out and I don’t really feel comfortable here with…you know.”

Jackal’s face lit up with understanding and he nodded.

“Sure thing! Do you want me to walk you out?”

“If you would,” Michelle said gratefully. Who knew what might be lurking behind the MC.

Jackal abandoned his post at the bar and headed to the back door, his hand hovering over the handle of a knife in the back of his belt as he pushed it open. He hesitated, searching the area with his eyes before relaxing his shoulders.

“Should be fine,” he said, leading Michelle outside. “But I’ll wait here with you just in case. As far as I know, this is like our secret getaway area, the pigs don’t know it’s here.”

Michelle laughed quietly. Why would they know it? It looked like a pile of old motorcycle parts and garbage. Who would want to be back there on purpose? But Michelle soon saw the genius of it. The door was concealed by a small collection of tires mounted to the door, that made it look like it was just another part of the dumping grounds. And when Snake approached, only then did she see the thin pathway leading out.

“This shit’s ridiculous,” Snake grumbled, stopping in front of Jackal to speak with him. “You make sure nobody does anything more than act like angels, you get me?”

Jackal nodded. “No problem, boss.”

“Ready then, young’un?” Snake asked, turning to Michelle. She nodded, and he turned away, back down the path from which he’d come.

They emerged out on a dark dirt road, hidden by thick forest. Snake had brought the truck again, probably hoping not to call too much attention to himself with the police staking out the MC. Michelle climbed in, grateful that she wouldn’t have to hang around the MC any longer. Who knew whether or not Alan would show up? She hadn’t taken it too well the last time he had.

If she saw him today, it would be even worse. Michelle was almost afraid that he would be able to smell Blade’s scent upon her, as if he were nothing more than a wild, possessive dog trying to drag his mate back to the den. It was scary, really, how off-balance Alan managed to make her feel. She thought all kinds of irrational things when he was there. Blamed herself for things that never were and never would be her fault.

“You all right?” Snake asked, glancing over at Michelle.

Snake was a tall, quiet, dignified man. He was surprisingly skinny to be the president of an MC, and seemed to be the type of leader who demanded respect despite maybe not being quite as physically intimidating as the rest of the men. He had been lean and strong when Michelle was a child, and although age had worn away his muscles, it had done nothing to touch his fierce attitude.

“I’m fine,” Michelle sighed. “Just thinking about Alan.”

Snake scoffed. “That ain’t his name anymore. Around me you’re to refer to him as ‘pigmeat.’”

Michelle laughed. “Why not bacon?”

Snake looked at her as if she were crazy. “I like bacon!”

She grinned and they finished the stretch of road out in silence, until they came upon a small wooden house with two pristine motorcycles parked in front of it.

“Home sweet home,” Snake mumbled, turning off the engine and walking to the door.

Michelle followed uncertainly. It was strange to be so far away from the MC after everything that had happened. In a way, she wished she had never left. The thought that she wouldn’t be able to turn to Blade should she need anything made her uncomfortable. He was the one who seemed most eager to protect her, to solve her problems. He was the one she wanted most of all…

But no. Both of them knew that it couldn’t possibly be. It was wrong.

“Michelle!” Jo exclaimed, suddenly pushing the thoughts of Blade out of her mind.

“Hi!” Michelle said as she was whisked into an enthusiastic hug.

“I’ve been takin’ notes on this show here for you,” Jo said, tugging her hand and leading her into the small, cozy living room area. “Let’s get you caught up.”

 

***
 

Snake had gone to bed, leaving Jo and Michelle up late in the living room. Just as Michelle had suspected, Jo had a way of making even the most mundane and unbelievable of shows convincing and entertaining, and she had been enjoying herself thoroughly.

“Something’s on your mind,” Jo said suddenly, looking pensively at Michelle.

“What?” Michelle asked, smiling innocently. The truth was that she had been thinking about Blade again. The softness of his lips, the contrast of his scratchy beard against her skin… but she was also thinking about how it just wasn’t meant to be.

“Don’t play me for a fool girl,” Jo said with a chuckle. “I know things. Good at reading people. Me and Snake are alike that way.”

Michelle sighed and leaned back against the couch. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Have you ever done something you know you shouldn’t?”

Jo cackled. “Look at me!”

Michelle grinned and nodded. “I just don’t want to do something for the wrong reasons, you know? And there’s so much going on…”

“Listen,” Jo said calmly. “There are times in life when you have to make a decision. Do you want to live according to everybody else’s rules or do you want to live by the rules that make you happy?”

Michelle sighed. “But it’s complicated. I don’t want to hurt anyone…or be hurt…”

Jo chuckled. “Living in fear ain’t the way to do things. The people in the MC know that to live life freely, you have to take what you want and don’t make any compromises. Not for anyone. And especially not for those people out there who think they know how you should be living your life. Chances are, most of the time, people like that are only out to control other people into becoming more like them.”

“What about breaking your own rules?” Michelle sighed. “There are just some things that are better left alone, right?”

“Well, that ain’t for me to say,” Jo said with a shrug. “You have to decide which rules to follow and which rules to break. Just don’t go being a jackass about it, thinking because society has a special way of doing things that you have to do things that way too, you know? Some things just don’t matter so much. It’s all on the surface. If a surface issue is causing you to turn away from a great thing that’s right in front of your face, then there isn’t any help for ya.”

Michelle was quiet as she considered this. Was age really just a surface thing? And was it possible that what she was feeling toward Blade was more than just a fleeing fancy? There was a certain wisdom in the idea of only living for yourself and taking what you wanted, but what she wanted seemed so…dangerous.

“What if what you want will hurt you in the end?” Michelle asked finally.

Jo smiled wistfully.

“Some of the most beautiful things in life come with a little bit of risk. You know, me and Snake met when I was about your age. We’ve been together ever since. It was scary at first, wondering if being with an older man was really a good idea. But we’ve been going strong ever since. He’s over 60 now! And I like to think I help keep him young.”

Michelle studied Jo as if seeing her for the first time. Sure, she had known that Jo and Snake had an age difference, but seeing them together had never felt odd or wrong. They were natural together. And it was true. Jo’s lively spirit seemed to make Snake’s life all the better, even if she was in her 40s and he in his 60s. Suddenly, Michelle felt a lot better about the situation with Blade. Not completely absolved, but better.

“Thanks, Jo,” Michelle said, smiling warmly at her new friend. It was almost as if Jo knew exactly what was going on and had been burning all night with the perfect advice to give her. But Jo was wise enough not to pry into detail.

They spent the rest of the night chatting and laughing together until they couldn’t keep their eyes open any longer, and finally went to sleep.

Chapter 10

Blade woke up the next morning and peered through the blinds. The pigs had switched shifts sometime during the night. Now, two new cop cars were parked outside the MC, just waiting for their chance to bust someone.

Jackal had come in the night before to inform him that Snake had taken Michelle away and he had been flooded with relief. Having that woman so damn close to him was making him nearly lose his mind. There was nothing honorable about wanting to fuck his best friend’s daughter. He just couldn’t bring himself to accept it, and having her dangling in front of his face, clearly wanting it just as badly as he did, could have made that night into something he would regret for the rest of his life.

“Hey.”

The blood rushed to his thighs at the sound of Michelle’s voice coming unexpectedly from behind him, and Blade whipped around, unable to fight the fire that consumed him in her presence.

“Hey,” he said, as casually as he could muster. But that didn’t take away the fact that he had spent the rest of the night in agony over his longing for her body. It had been so close…right within his reach. And doing the right thing had been one of the hardest things he had ever done in his life. But he would do it for Zeke. He had to. Besides, she was just a kid.

“The police are still outside?” Michelle asked, coming up close beside him to peer out the window. She sighed when she saw the new cars. “I wonder how long they’re going to do this.”

“Probably until things are settled between you and the pigfucker,” Blade said, turning away from the window and taking a few healthy steps away from Michelle. The smell of her was starting to drive him up the wall. Maybe it would be better if she had stayed at Snake’s house a little longer. She was like a drug that hadn’t completely worked itself out of his system yet.

“I don’t know if that will ever happen,” Michelle sighed. “He thinks he owns me or something. He’s got all of them convinced I’m some kind of lunatic and he’s the only person who is willing to take care of me.”

“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard,” Blade scoffed. “Any man would be insane not to want to take care of you. And the real fuckin’ crazy one is him. Any of those pigs out there had any common sense in their skulls, they would know it, too!”

Michelle looked down at her hands, a smile playing on her lips.

“You always know what to say to make me feel better,” she said quietly.

Blade shifted uncomfortably. He should probably leave the room now. It was too damn painful to be so close to her with all of these idiotic thoughts flying around in his head like this.

“Actually, I don’t know shit,” Blade said, suddenly irritated. He didn’t want to be around her. Didn’t she get that? He was trying so hard to keep his shit under control. The idea of her just willingly seeking him out was infuriating.

“What do you mean?” Michelle asked, her eyes turning to him. He was caught once again in her gaze, feeling like a deer in headlights. Could she see through him, or was he just imagining it? Either way, it was time to take control of the situation again. He had let things go too far.

“I mean I don’t think we should be doing this right now!” Blade growled. “Do you have any idea…”

He trailed off. He wasn’t going to look weak in front of her. Tell her how goddamn hard he had to work to keep his hands to himself and not give in to his impulses every time she looked at him. That would just give her more power over the situation than he would know how to deal with. He owed it to his friend to be the mature one in the situation. To act like a fuckin’ adult and know what was right.

“We’re not doing anything,” Michelle said, glowering and walking slowly toward him. She stopped close to his body and whispered into his ear. “And I think maybe that’s the problem.”

Blade growled, his body engulfed in fire as the tickle of her breath brushed against his earlobes. His cock was instantly hard and he glared down at Michelle, who was eyeing him curiously.

“We’re adults,” she said. “I’ve been thinking. Maybe if we just get it out of the way, then it won’t bother us like this anymore. You can go back to living your life and I can go back to living mine, you know?”

No, Blade didn’t know. Because it wasn’t just her body he wanted. It was the way being with her made him feel. Like he was worthy again.

“That doesn’t sound like a good idea,” Blade said, fighting against his every impulse.

“It’s not,” Michelle agreed, pulling away from him. “I’m sorry. Just ignore what I said.”

Ignore what she said? As she headed out of the room, Blade’s body filled with a combination of fury and longing. How the hell could he just ignore what she said?

Before he could stop himself, he was gripping Michelle by the arms, whipping her around to face him. Her eyes widened, whether in fear or surprise he couldn’t tell, and suddenly he was dipping in to the forbidden fruit, tasting the sweetness of her lips. He closed his eyes, letting his body and his hands take the reins as he surrendered to the forbidden passions inside of him.

Michelle gasped softly, her body trembling beneath his touch, and he knew that there would be no going back this time. He was on his way to hell.

He lifted Michelle in the air, pressing her middle firmly against his groin so that her weight would rest on his aching member, and she moaned quietly as she felt the physical testament to his longing against her. Everything happened in a blur as his lips devoured every inch of the flesh exposed by Michelle’s blouse and he continued to taste her as he carried her carefully from the common room and into his bedroom.

Blade dropped her onto the bed, his loins alive with longing. Michelle’s eyes caught his in the dim light of the bedroom, and Blade growled, tearing her blouse open and letting his hands fall down the milky slopes of her breasts. She closed her eyes, her chest rising and falling rapidly as Blade dropped his lips down over her perky pink nipple and gave it a tug.

This seemed to awaken a beast inside of her and Michelle bucked her hips against him, opening her eyes and fumbling with the belt of his jeans. When she managed to finally tug them open, Blade’s cock was released from its prison and Michelle pursed her lips.

Pleasure electrified him as she ran her long, delicate fingers along his shaft, sending him into action. He stripped off the rest of their clothes, dropping fervent kisses along the perfection of her smooth body. Michelle responded to each and he plunged himself suddenly inside of her.

The cry of ecstasy that escaped her lips made his cock swell inside the silken walls of her sex, and she gripped his shoulders tightly as he began to unleash the power that had been pent up inside of him for so long. It was probably wrong. He knew it. But it felt too right.

He studied Michelle’s beautiful face as he released his repressed rage inside her body. She was absolutely perfect in his eyes, and another torrent of fierce longing electrified him. He thrust powerfully inside of her, gritting his teeth as he tried desperately to rid himself of the feeling that what he was doing was wrong. He had waited so long to feel her beneath him. And now that she was there, he dreaded for the feeling to end. Because he knew that when it was over, he would probably never be able to see himself, or Michelle for that matter, the same way again.

Chapter 11

Michelle gasped in pleasure as Blade halted his hips and gazed down at her. The stillness of his cock inside of her sent unexpected thrills throughout her body as the muscles inside of her contracted around him, and she writhed on the bed, anxious to feel him moving again.

But when she looked up at him, the look on his face was haunted.

“What is it?” she whispered, reaching up to touch his cheek. Blade flinched away from her touch and he refused to look her in the eyes.

“It’s not right,” he grumbled. “I’m taking advantage.”

A bubble of laughter burst from Michelle, surprising them both.

“Only we can decide what’s right for us,” Michelle said, trying her hand at Jo’s philosophy. “It’s going to be all right. Unless you leave me hanging like this. Then you’re going to regret it.”

Blade grinned down at her, his face glowing. Was that adoration she caught in his eyes? But he had averted them far too quickly for her to tell, and suddenly his soft lips were hot against her flesh once again, and her breath was caught in her throat as he slowly, almost lovingly, moved his lips along her skin. They left fire in their wake, and she closed her eyes tightly, overwhelmed by the sudden explosion that erupted deep inside her loins. No man had ever made her feel this way before, and suddenly, his cock seemed to know exactly where to go.

The inferno inside of her was stoked by the friction of Blade’s member, and Michelle breathed heavily as, again and again, he brought more fuel to the fire. Soon, every nerve in her body was bursting with the explosive rapture of Blade’s body, and she threw her head back, a deep groan resonating from her throat.

She could almost feel Blade grinning down at her as he moved his body on top of her, the warm comfort of his broad muscles enveloping her as he moved his body expertly until she couldn’t hold back any longer.

“Fuck,” Michelle breathed as Blade quickened the pace of his hips, letting out a little growl as he felt her body tense up beneath him. She was on the edge of the most powerful feeling she’d ever had, and she was almost too scared to give in to it.

But running away wasn’t an option and Blade buried his lips in the nape of her neck, the contrasting feeling of his soft lips and the stubble of his beard sending her over the edge, into an earth-shattering climax. She shuddered beneath him as he moaned appreciatively, speeding up the rocking of his hips until there wasn’t a thought in her head anymore – just the pure sensation of her climax.

The power was intensified when a sudden explosion of heat erupted inside of her and Blade groaned deeply in her ear, his cock fierce as he emptied every last drop of his own orgasm into her body. He emptied himself completely inside of her, prolonging her orgasm until they were both completely spent.

Blade slowly pulled out of her body and rolled onto his back beside her, staring at the ceiling, his broad chest heaving powerfully as he seemed to consider what they had just done together.

Without a word, he rose from the bed and disappeared into the small bathroom connected to the room. Michelle took the sound of the shower running as her cue to go, and left to her own room without another word.

***

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Michelle asked Jo as they spread a red and white checkered tablecloth over a picnic table in front of the MC.

“I think it’s a great idea!” Jo exclaimed. “What’s more all-American than a barbeque for the Fourth of July?”

“But the cops are still out there,” Michelle said under her breath, nodding toward the single police car posted outside of the MC.

“All the more reason to show them that we have just as much of a right to freedom as they do, don’t you think?”

Michelle smiled and nodded. “I guess so.”

The grill was smoking heavily, with Jackal manning the hotdogs and hamburgers, and the yard was a bustle of activity as burly bikers came and went, some with beers in their hands, others with bags of potato chips or bottles of ketchup. It was kind of cute, in a way. It was probably the most normal thing that had happened since she’d arrived at the MC.

Michelle’s heart lurched suddenly when she spied Blade in the doorway, overlooking the scene with an unidentifiable look in his eye. He took a swig of the glass beer bottle sweating in his hands and then disappeared back inside the MC.

“Everything all right there, Michelle?” Jo asked, an annoyingly knowing lilt in her voice.

“Perfect,” Michelle said brightly. Jo laughed to herself and Michelle’s insides seemed to shrivel.

In truth, it had been nearly two weeks since her tryst with Blade, and he hadn’t looked at or spoken to her since then, except maybe to be polite or grumble for her to pass the salt. He was still making breakfast for them both, but he ate his in the common room and left hers on the table. There were no more good morning knocks on her bedroom door, and she had never felt more miserably lonely in all of her life.

“Who’s got the plates?” Jackal shouted.

A few men mumbled and supplied Jackal with the necessary tools to serve the first round of burgers and hot dogs, and soon the picnic tables were full of burly Pythons and the women who loved them as they ate their meals, enjoying themselves pointedly in front of the pathetic asshole in the cop car who was stationed to keep an eye on them.

“Michelle, come on and get something to eat, girl!” Jackal called. “Let’s show these pigs you’re not here against your will.”

Michelle smiled and walked over to the grill. She was feeling really hungry, especially after working all morning with Jo on the preparations for the barbeque. Jackal gave her a plate with both a hamburger and a hotdog on it, and she filled her plate before sitting back down with Jo.

“So how are things going out here, anyway?” Jo asked as they started eating. “I know things are probably stressful with these clowns watching over your every move.”

“It’s not that bad,” Michelle said dismissively. “I’ve started being able to ignore them. Now instead of thinking of Alan – “

Jo raised a stern eyebrow at her and Michelle laughed.

“I mean pigmeat,” she corrected herself. “I just think about how pathetic he is to feel like he has to keep tabs on me like this and pick a fight with a powerful as hell MC.”

“That’s the truth!” Jo exclaimed, holding her beer up for a cheers. Michelle smiled and reciprocated it, grateful that even without Blade being on speaking terms with her, she was still able to find a friend among the MC.

“I don’t know what I would do without you guys,” Michelle said, biting into her hot dog. “It’s been so hard…”

A sudden wave of nausea overwhelmed Michelle, and she frowned and stood up with her hand over her mouth.

“Are you all right?” Jo asked, rushing to Michelle’s side.

Michelle nodded, but retched again, and ran from the yard and locked herself in the upstairs bathroom, where she proceeded to get very sick.

She finished and washed her face, looking at herself in the mirror. What was that all about? She must have eaten something strange. But she ate the same thing everybody else at the MC ate. Maybe just a bug.

“Are you all right?”

A confusing mixture of feelings overwhelmed her when she stepped out of the bathroom and nearly bumped into Blade’s broad body. He was standing just outside the door, concern etched all over his face.

“I’ll be fine,” Michelle said, shooting a faltering smile at him. “It’s probably just a stomach bug.”

“Hm…” he said. The way he was looking at her made her uncomfortable. Not just because it brought back the memory of his lips all over her body, but because it seemed that he didn’t quite believe her.

“Michelle!”

Jo’s voice echoed up the staircase and Blade’s face took on the quality of someone who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He quickly retreated back into the common room, just as Jo rounded the top of the staircase like a bat out of hell.

“I’m fine!” Michelle insisted as Jo forced a glass of cool water into her hands and placed a damp towel over her forehead. Her concern was truly touching, but the truth was, she felt completely fine now. As if whatever the bug had been had been expelled from her body immediately.

“Well we’re not going to be taking any chances with you, ya hear me? What would Zeke say?”

Michelle smiled sadly at the ground. She had been close to her father, calling him in secret every chance she got, but she had never gathered up the courage to go back to the MC to visit. They were so controversial, and Alan, being the chief of police, had a lot to say about Michelle’s family. It had just been easier not to go out to see him.

Zeke had risked his freedom to come and see her, though, and every month he would go downtown and meet her for lunch on the days that Alan thought she was grocery shopping while he was at work. It always had to be a very secretive affair, but it was one she now treasured. She just couldn’t believe she had let such a horrible man rob her of time with her family.

“I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, Jo,” Michelle said, allowing Jo to lead her to her bedroom and lay her down. “It’s been difficult for me.”

“Well there’s no need to worry about that, M. You’re with us now.”

Michelle smiled. She wished she had really earned her place in the MC. Sure, her father had been a Python, and it was so comforting to be there under the biker’s protection, but was she a Python? Or just a burden?

At first, she had felt like the MC was her home again, especially when things with Blade had been going well. But now that they could barely stand in the same room with each other for longer than three minutes without it getting awkward, the MC just felt empty and lonely.

“All right,” Jo said with a kind smile. “You drink that right up and get some rest. Come down if you’re feeling better. We’re doing some fireworks tonight. I’ll come check on you to see how you feel.”

“That sounds great,” Michelle said quietly.

Jo winked at her and left the room, leaving Michelle in bed feeling more alone than ever.

Chapter 12

Blade woke up early. There would be a lot of cleaning up to do after the celebration the night before. He had been worried sick about Michelle, but when she’d finally emerged from her bedroom, she looked as healthy as ever.

They had stood beside each other under the dark night sky, gazing up at the fireworks in silence. The presence of her body so close to his made him want to run away, but he was too worried to leave her side. He would be there if anything happened to her.

Fortunately, nothing did, and just as the fireworks were coming to a close, Michelle gripped his hand tightly in hers.

“I don’t want things to be so strange between us,” she whispered. “It’s tearing me apart.”

Blade had grimaced and pulled his hand away, but she was only speaking the same thing he had been feeling. It felt awful for them to be on such distant terms. Even if Zeke hadn’t wanted them to get together, he would have liked this less. He was such a family-oriented man. The last thing he’d want was an estrangement.

And so, Blade had decided that he would clean up the place and then make breakfast for Michelle, and actually eat it with her, just like old times. Maybe from there they would be able to figure out just what in the hell they were doing.

Blade crossed the hallway, heading to the kitchen, but a strange rustling sound halted him in his footsteps. The sound was coming from Zeke’s room. Nobody had been in there since his friend had passed away and Blade had been designated to find the perfect suit in Zeke’s closet for his burial.

The hackles on the back of his neck stood up as he thought about the police cars that had begun setting up shop outside of the MC. If they thought they were going to pull a fast one over on him, then they had another thing coming.

Blade crept forward silently, relying on the stealth training he’d received early on in his life from his own father who had been in the army and had wanted to make sure his boy could survive in any situation. If the damn pigs were looking for some incriminating information, they sure as hell weren’t going to find it in a dead man’s room.

He reached into his back pocket, his hands tensed over his knife, and burst through Zeke’s door.

“What the hell?!”

Blade jumped back in surprise at the sound of Michelle’s voice and she stood up glaring at him as if he were the most barbaric human being on the face of the Earth. And he might very well have been, for all he knew, because Michelle’s face was stained with tears. She had been looking through her father’s belongings, probably all night long from the looks of it.

“I’m sorry,” Blade mumbled, pocketing his knife and leaning against the door with a heavy sigh. “I thought you were the cops or something. You know the MC has a lot of enemies. You can’t be too careful. Especially with a lady like yourself sleeping just a door away.”

Michelle pursed her lips at him. “It’s all right,” she said. “I don’t think I want to be alone right now anyway.”

“Well better my company than the pigs,” Blade said, false cheerfulness slipping into his voice. The truth was, he was uncomfortable as hell. Death and feelings just weren’t really his thing. And he knew that death would be the biggest thing on Michelle’s mind. What if he said the wrong thing? The last thing he wanted to do was make matters worse with her.

“Did you know my dad listened to bluegrass?” Michelle said, changing the subject with a little smile. “I had no idea. I thought it was just a guilty pleasure for me. I guess I got it from him.”

“I’m sure the two of you are more alike than you know. I always got the impression that he thought you two would be the best of friends under the right circumstances. Family stuff is tough though.”

Michelle nodded. “I chose the wrong family.”

Blade grimaced. It was clear she was blaming herself for not spending enough time with her father before the end came, but from what he’d seen, it was better she hide in a hole than risk being touched by that cowardly son of a bitch she’d married.

“I don’t think you had much of a choice in the matter. People like the pigfucker are sneaky bastards, you know? They win you over with all this charm and pomp, make you feel better than you ever have before. Until they twist it all around on you. It’s not your fault. It’s his. And your dad understood you had to live your life. He was proud of you, in fact, for doing what needed to be done to keep your head above water.”

“I don’t feel like it was enough,” Michelle sighed. “I wish I could have seen him just one last time.”

“Wishing doesn’t help anything,” Blade said dismissively. “I have a thousand wishes, but you know what I get when I waste time on whining about them? A fuckin’ headache.”

Michelle scoffed. “You don’t wish you could talk to him one last time?”

Blade raised an eyebrow. “Your dad and I were best friends because both of us live in the now, Michie. We don’t waste our time on propriety and custom and all the other bullshit that makes hoity-toity people feel like they’ve got some semblance of control over their lives. He and I both knew that we were free, and the only thing that had any power over us was when our time came. And his did. He’s at peace with that and I think we should be too.”

Michelle considered this for a moment, before looking up at Blade with tears shimmering in her eyes.

“Do you think he would be mad at us? For what we’ve done?”

Blade sighed deeply. This feeling thing was just getting worse and worse. Maybe this was why he had never settled down before now.

“I’m not sure. Not mad at you, exactly. Me, probably,” Blade said, laughing softly. Michelle laughed, too, and Blade felt his whole body relax a little bit. Everything was all right in the world if Michelle was smiling.

“Maybe we can just start over,” Michelle said finally, standing up resolutely. “We can be friends and just friends. I think he’d like that.”

“Oh yeah?” Blade said, studying Michelle closely. God, she was beautiful. He’d never met a woman anything like her. it seemed like it was impossible to bring her down. Even after surviving being married to the biggest douche bag on the planet and going through her dead dad’s things, she managed to find the courage to smile. He was in awe, really.

“Yes. What do you think?” Michelle asked.

Blade grinned, relief flooding through him. It was exactly what he had been hoping for. It would give him a chance to redeem himself and prove to the both of them that he wasn’t just a piece of shit who was taking advantage of a vulnerable young woman. He was an honorable man. That’s what he would want Zeke to remember. And if his buddy was looking down on them at any point, he’d want him to be proud, not horrified or ashamed.

“All right,” he said, taking her hand in his and giving it a decisive pump. “Friends.”

***
 

“Listen up everybody!”

The MC suddenly grew quiet as Jo burst through the doors, a smile stretched across her face from ear to ear.

“I want you to say hello to my cousin Brett. He’s from out of town and will be visiting for a few weeks. I want you all to treat him like one of the family, you got it?”

A slender young man walked into the bar, smiling timidly. He didn’t look quite like he belonged there, but he wasn’t exactly out of place, either. He had defined muscle, that was true, and his clothes were casual, but neat. There was something about him that Blade didn’t like very much, though what it was difficult to place. Maybe he would figure it out once he got to know him more.

“Hi, everybody,” Brett said, his smile going from timid to charming in about half a second flat.

Blade watched, his heart surging with fury, as Brett and Michelle caught eyes. Maybe that’s why he hadn’t liked the guy. He was around Michie’s age. And that meant the possibility of competition.

Blade shook his head. He wasn’t supposed to be thinking of Michelle like that anymore. She wasn’t some woman he could just up and claim like that. She had her own life to live, and it had to be one that she would be able to live with, just like Blade. And that meant not getting involved with an older biker man, and maybe, just maybe, following up on the strange sparks that seemed to be flying as Brett and Michelle fell into an easy conversation.

Blade growled inwardly and left the room, heading upstairs as quickly as he could so that he wouldn’t have to see any more of the MC’s newest playboy in action. Little piece of shit, walking in like he owned the place.

But he was Jo’s family, which meant that, in a way, he was Blade’s family, too. That was just great. He had enough issues with the family he already had.

Blade sighed. It really wasn’t any of his business. He had made a promise to himself, and a deal with Michelle, not to get invested in her any longer. That meant not giving a shit whether or not the pretty boy in the crisp civvies was trying to get into Michelle’s pants or not. What man that age with a single cell in his brain wouldn’t?

It really wasn’t his place to care anymore though. Michelle was an adult and she was going to just have to learn to take care of herself. Even if that meant learning the hard way not to engage in conversation with ill-intentioned pretty boys.

Chapter 13

“Jo has told me a lot about you already,” Brett said, shooting Michelle an apologetic smile. “So please forgive me if I seem presumptuous.”

“What exactly has Jo told you?” Michelle said with a strained laugh. She didn’t want to sound as uncomfortable as the idea made her feel, for Jo’s sake more than for Brett’s, but she couldn’t help it. She really wasn’t ready to date again, and if this was Jo’s attempt at match-making, she was pretty far off.

It wasn’t that Brett was unattractive. On the contrary, he was handsome, charming, and very well-groomed. But those were all qualities that had initially attracted her to Alan, and if she was going to date anybody again in her life, she would know better than to be lured in by those physical things too soon.

“Well, that really might be best discussed another time,” Brett said, smiling sympathetically. Suddenly, Michelle felt foolish. Jo had been blabbing her entire life’s story to this guy. It was painfully obvious.

“So she is trying to set me up,” Michelle said, more to herself than to Brett.

“What?” Brett asked with a delighted chuckle. “No, actually that wouldn’t work.”

“What do you mean?” Michelle asked, suddenly very confused. If it wasn’t a set up, then why had Brett taken such a keen interest in her?

“Actually, I’m already taken,” Brett said. “And my boyfriend wouldn’t like it very much if I decided to follow Jo up on the offer to meet the potential ‘woman of my dreams.’”

“What?!” Michelle exclaimed. “What are you doing here then? These big goons would eat you alive if they knew!”

Brett smiled thinly. “I rather hope they wouldn’t. And if you could just keep this our little secret, then I would surely owe you one.”

“Of course,” Michelle said with a sigh. “So why did Jo want us to talk then? Doesn’t she know you’re gay?”

Brett laughed. “She knew before my parents did. The girl of my dreams thing was just a joke. Actually, there is something rather unfortunate that we have in common. But it might not be appropriate to discuss it in such a…busy…area. Would you like to join me for a walk?”

Blade suddenly appeared on the stairs, giving Brett a death look. Michelle frowned in confusion, and then realized with a sudden jolt of clarity, that Blade was jealous. But it wasn’t a good idea for them to be feeling this way, and if he was still jealous, that meant that he might still have feelings for her. Feelings Michelle just couldn’t deal with right now.

“I would love to go on a walk with you,” Michelle said. It was her least confusing option right now. if she didn’t go, she would have to go back upstairs with Blade again and risk having feelings, or maybe even a conversation that she just shouldn’t be having right now.

“Great!”

Michelle felt a twinge of guilt as Brett laced his arm in hers and the death look from Blade seemed to burn straight through their backs as they headed out the door. Blade would have no idea that she and Brett were never going to end up together, but if he was already going back on his deal with her, then maybe he deserved to feel a little bit uncomfortable. Right?

“I just love the smell of the fresh air,” Brett said with a grin, taking a glance at the side of the MC. There were two police cars parked there that day, and he looked away quickly. “I haven’t been out to the country in ages.”

“Yeah, it can be a nice little getaway sometimes,” Michelle agreed.

“It feels like just yesterday I was a kid, running up and down mountains like this without having a care in the world. I’d give anything to have that time back again.”

“You make it sound like you’re a hundred years old!” Michelle said, laughing.

Brett grinned at her. “I’m really not, but I do feel a lot older than I am, for a lot of reasons.”

“Like what?” Michelle asked, suddenly intrigued.

“Well, although some of them are personal, I assume that is why Jo wanted us to meet,” Brett said, dancing around the subject.

They rounded the bend and came upon a comfortable hiking trail.

“Would you like to?” Brett asked, offering his hand out.

“Of course,” Michelle said. She had hiked the trail once with Jo before. It was a beautiful, serene little place. It would do her some good to spend some time somewhere peaceful.

“I’m afraid I have been in your position,” Brett said abruptly, once they were a safe distance away from the road.

“What do you mean?” Michelle asked. ”What position?”

“When I first started dating, I guess I didn’t have very good taste in men. The one I did find was very, very cruel. I ended up a victim of domestic abuse for a little over four years.”

“Oh my god,” Michelle gasped. It was almost worse to hear about someone else going through it than it had been to deal with it herself. “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine, now,” Brett said. “But it took some time. I think Jo just wanted to introduce us because she thought it would be good for the two of us to have someone to talk to. Of course, it’s a very difficult thing to talk about, so feel free to keep your silence as well. I don’t want you to feel pressured or anything.”

Michelle sighed. It was a heavy subject, that was for sure.

“I’m not even sure it’s really over,” Michelle admitted. “I keep expecting him to find some other way around the law. Instead of just convincing all of his buddies that I’m a basket case and that he’s the only one who can keep me in line, maybe he would actually manage to get one of them into the MC, or come himself and steal me back to that house…”

Michelle’s voice broke and Brett put his arm around her quickly.

“It doesn’t feel like it’s over yet because in a way it’s not. He’s still trying to torture you the only way he knows how. And he will until somebody puts him in his place.”

“Well nobody here can do that,” Michelle said miserably. “You don’t just beat the shit out of the chief of police without going to jail. Or worse. The police are trying to dig up all the dirt they possibly can so that they could all be convicted, just for helping me get away from that asshole!”

Brett pursed his lips, sighing deeply. “It’s a tricky situation. Jo has filled me in, some. But I promise you, it does get better. And she told me that the vice president of the MC has been in touch with a really good lawyer to fight on your defense. That’s worth something. It really is.”

Michelle nodded. “I just wish it was over already,” she sighed. “It has been dragging on for so long now.”

Brett nodded. “It’s going to be all right.”

A sudden pang of nausea welled up inside of Michelle and she halted abruptly on the trail.

“What is it?” Brett asked. “Are you all right?”

“I think I’m going to be sick,” Michelle said miserably, running a little bit off the trail and bending over into the bushes to vomit.

It was just like what had happened during the picnic for the Fourth  of July. Except that this time, she had a witness. When Michelle was finished, she rinsed her mouth out with the bottle of water she had been holding when she left the bar and headed back to find Brett.

“I’m so sorry,” she mumbled when she finally managed her way back onto the trail. “I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately.”

“Maybe you’re pregnant,” Brett joked.

Michelle froze and the smile faded from Brett’s face.

“…which is totally fine if you are! There are a lot of options for you to consider. You can raise the baby, or not, without your husband’s help!”

Michelle shook her head, silencing Brett, who was now terribly flustered.

“Can I tell you a secret? And you have to promise not to tell anybody else. Especially Jo!”

“Of course,” Brett said, frowning seriously.

Michelle studied him, using an old trick that her father had taught her to determine whether or not she would be able to trust him. When she felt comfortable that he was telling the truth, she sighed.

“If I’m pregnant, the baby wouldn’t belong to my husband,” Michelle whispered. “It would belong to Blade.”

***
Michelle spent the rest of the night locked in her bedroom. Brett had promised to take a trip to the pharmacy in town to buy Michelle a pregnancy test, but he wouldn’t be able to bring it until the next day.

She agonized over whether or not she should tell Blade exactly what was going on, but what would it mean to him? If she was just a problem that he was trying to get rid of, then he might not even claim the child as his own. He might think that she was pregnant with Alan’s child or demand a paternity test.

Michelle knew for a fact, though, that she had refused to sleep with Alan for the past six months. He didn’t seem to care all that much and bragged every once in a while about the new forensics officer who had picked him up on his offer of steamy office sex, in the hopes of making her jealous. It was just another way to pick a fight with her, really, but she had learned better by then than to question anything that Alan did.

This time, there was nobody to turn to. Brett was doing what he could for her, but she still didn’t feel quite comfortable telling him everything that was on her mind about it. He was kind, and very helpful, sure, but Michelle liked to deal with her problems on her own. Asking anybody for help had always been a mistake, and her father had raised her to be independent. No, she would have to deal with this situation with Blade by herself. Whether she liked it or not.

Michelle stood up from her bed and walked cautiously out of the room, her hands trembling as she made the trek toward Blade’s door. The truth had a way of coming out and she would just have to try and trust that he would be a man about it.

But when she knocked, there was no answer. She rattled the doorknob, but it was locked, and she leaned against the heavy oak door and sighed. Either he was sleeping or he had left the MC. She would have to talk to him about it later.

There was no chance in hell of catching any sleep any time soon, so Michelle headed to the common room to watch some television. If nothing else, it would distract her from the terrifying events of the night.

She sat down heavily on the couch and suddenly started to cry. It was the first time she had really cried in years. Not since the third or fourth time that Alan had beaten her had she allowed herself to really tap into the pain of the emotions she was dealing with. Now though, it didn’t seem like there would be an end to the tears.

“Shhh.”

Suddenly she was being swept up into the strong arms of a familiar body, and she was overwhelmed by the rugged scent of Blade’s t-shirt against her face.

“It’s going to be all right, beauty. Everything is going to be fine. No matter what’s going on with you, it’s going to be fine.”

But he didn’t know that she was pregnant. He didn’t know that he was going to be a father to a child he probably wouldn’t even want. He probably wouldn’t even think it was his.

The tears continued to spill as Blade shushed her gently, kissing her forehead tenderly until her sobs turned to hiccups and she grew still in his arms.

“There you go,” he said, sitting her up and standing to retrieve some tissues from the bookshelf across the room. He sat down heavily, his muscular body sinking the couch around him so that she fell near him again. Blade caught her easily and smiled down at her. “I was wondering when you’d cry.”

Michelle was offended at first, as if he were somehow implying that she was weak, but quickly realized that there was nothing but concern in Blade’s deep blue eyes. She hid her face, both ashamed of herself for thinking so little of him and for wanting so badly for the comfort he was giving her to last throughout the rest of their lives. It wasn’t the way it was supposed to be though, so why was she trying to force it?

“Thanks for the tissue,” Michelle said dumbly. But what was she supposed to say? Hey Blade, I’m pregnant with your child! Now what?

That would go over well.

“You shouldn’t thank people for stupid little things. Thank them when it matters,” Blade said, nudging her chin with his fist. “Don’t want anyone thinking you’re soft, do you?”

Michelle shook her head but she was cringing inwardly. She was soft. Too soft to tell him the truth.

But she felt a surge of relief when she realized, she might not actually be pregnant. She hadn’t taken the test yet. This agony of truth-telling could actually wait another day.

Michelle stood from the couch, smiling wearily at Blade.

“I’m sorry if I woke you,” she said. “I appreciate you coming out here like that. You didn’t have to.”

“It’s nothing,” Blade said, looking quickly away from her. They shouldn’t be doing this. Michelle knew they shouldn’t. And the longer she stood there with him, the harder it would be not to. For the both of them. Not only that, but the harder it would be to keep her mouth shut. It would be better for them both if she knew for sure whether or not her worst fears were going to be realized. She didn’t even know if Blade liked kids or not!

“Good night,” Michelle said, tearing herself away from his comforting presence and heading to the bedroom.

“Night kid,” Blade said distractedly.

Michelle hurried into the room and locked the door behind her. There were already enough issues in her life. She didn’t have to make another one by telling Blade she might be pregnant. She would just wait until she knew for sure and then deal with whatever happened however she could. No matter what, she knew, life goes on, and whether Blade was there or not, or she had a baby or not, she would survive. She had to.

***
“How the hell did you manage to get Blade out of the house?” Michelle exclaimed. Brett laughed.

“I pulled in a favor from Snake. But of course, I did it very sneakily. You know. Besides, it’s the truth. I’ve heard Blade can really work an engine and mine has been faulty lately.”

“I can’t believe it,” Michelle said, laughing quietly. “Come in and sit down. This might take a while.”

Brett walked into the room and made himself comfortable in one of the leather armchairs in the corner. He handed her a small brown paper bag and raised his eyebrow expectantly. “I already read everything about this test available online. Two blue stripes mean yes.”

Michelle laughed. “Thanks.”

She disappeared into the bathroom and re-emerged a few minutes later.

“We have to wait 15 minutes,” she said sulkily. “What are we supposed to do in the meantime?”

“Have sex?” Brett joked. “Everybody already thinks that’s what we’re doing.”

Michelle laughed despite her trepidation. “I’m sure your boyfriend would just love that.”

Brett smiled.

“Don’t worry,” he said. “I brought a deck of cards.”

“Thank god,” Michelle said, sitting down across from Brett. They decided on poker, and Brett dealt.

“So what are you going to do if the results are positive? Do you think you’re going to need some other place to stay?” Brett asked, studying his hand closely.

“I haven’t really thought that far ahead,” Michelle admitted. “I’m still kind of stuck at the stage of whether or not I tell Blade. Or more like how, I guess.”

Brett smiled reassuringly at her. “It’s probably not going to be as bad as you think. He’s not like your husband. And you’re sure the baby would be his?”

“It’s definitely Blade’s,” Michelle sighed. “I know my body and lately he’s the only one who’s been near it.”

“What do you think he’s going to say if you’re pregnant?” Brett asked. “Call.”

“Full house,” Michelle said, revealing her hand. “I have no idea. He’s probably going to freak.

“Maybe,” Brett said with a nod. “Or maybe everything will be fine. And even if he freaks, so what? Your life is affected more than his. It’s the law of breeding. Oh, and I had a pair of queens. Lucky you!”

Michelle glanced up at the clock. Another seven minutes until they would know the results of her pregnancy test.

“We’ll see about that,” she sighed. “Hopefully this luck won’t run out.”

Chapter 14

Blade stormed into the MC, his blood boiling. For some reason, Jo had apparently volunteered him to help out her stupid cousin by working on the motor of his bike. It was less than impressive, if he was going to be honest, and probably the most insulting part about it was that there wasn’t anything wrong with it to speak of.

Still, Snake had stayed outside on the porch of his house, offering completely useless suggestions for Blade to try. He had heeded a few of them just out of politeness to his boss but there was a point when a man had to put his foot down. He’d ended up snapping at Snake and nearly snapping Brett’s stupid bike in half. That would show him to waste his time.

Blade’s foul mood got even fouler when Jackal nodded for him to join him in private behind the MC. He passed Blade a cigarette and lit one himself before finally cutting to the chase.

“You know Jo’s cousin? The scrawny kid?”

“Brett. What about him?” Blade asked, trying his best to stay neutral. Nobody had to know he had beef with the kid. If it got back to Jo, it would break her heart.

“He came in here about an hour ago with a little brown paper bag in his hand. Went straight upstairs like he lives here or something and hasn’t been back down since.”

“Are you fucking serious?” Blade growled, his fingers itching for his knife. It had been a while since he’d drawn blood, but Brett’s flesh seemed to be begging for it.

“Reckon he had condoms or something in there,” Jackal snorted. “He’s probably giving Zeke’s girl the old what for, you know what I mean?”

Blade roared in anger and threw the cigarette on the ground. He pushed past Jackal and stormed up the stairs, tearing through the hallways until he got to Michelle’s doorway. He listened at the door for anything incriminating, and suddenly heard Michelle sob.

Blade’s heart hammered in his chest and a black cloud of rage settled over him. He had to go in there to make sure that everything was all right. He didn’t even bother knock. Instead, he kicked the door down.

When he entered the room, Blade’s eyes locked on Brett, who was sitting in the armchair to his left like the cat who ate the canary and suddenly his hands were around the boy’s throat and he was slamming him into the wall.

“Blade, stop it! What the hell are you doing?!” Michelle shouted.

“You’re going to let this slippery son of a bitch touch you?” Blade shouted, rage billowing off his body. “You don’t have better sense than that?”

“Touch me?” Michelle exclaimed. “He brought me a pregnancy test, Blade! And he wouldn’t touch me if I wanted him to! He’s gay!”

Blade froze and looked down at Brett, who had his eyes squeezed closed as if he were about to breathe his last breath. And if Michelle hadn’t stopped him, maybe that would have been true.

“A pregnancy test?” Blade demanded, relaxing his grip a little on Brett’s neck. “Show me!”

Michelle glared at him and stomped to the bathroom, then returned holding a little white stick.

“Blue lines, asshole. It means I’m pregnant. Now get the hell out of here before you do any more damage!”

“Pregnant…” Blade mumbled, finally letting Brett slip out of his hands and back into the armchair. “Are you serious?”

“Out!” Michelle shouted.

Blade grimaced. He’d really stepped in it this time. He gaped at Michelle a moment longer before he turned around and left the room without another word.

***

Blade sank down heavily on his bed as Michelle’s words echoed again and again in his head. She was pregnant. But if she was pregnant, did that mean that he was going to be the father? Or was it possible that the child belonged to the pigfucker?

Either way, he was worried. If Alan found out that Michelle was having a child, it would keep him in her life a hell of a lot longer than he should be. And there was the possibility of sharing custody and all the baggage that could come along with that. Not to mention the possibility of a guy like Alan unleashing his temper on the poor kid.

If the child belonged to Blade though, a whole other slew of complications would arise from that. Everybody at the MC would find out that he’d fucked his best friend’s daughter, barely before the poor guy was cold in the ground. What kind of example would that set to his men? He would probably have to step down as the vice president of the MC. Maybe Jackal would end up filling the role.

At least, that was if he and Michelle didn’t end up raising the child together, which was an entirely different matter. The possibility of that happening was probably zilch. She had seen the kind of man he was- a man who took advantage of a young, grieving girl and enjoyed his own sinful desires with her, with no regard to her own purity.

What kind of woman in her right mind would want to raise her child with a guy like Blade? He’d never managed to settle down a day in his life before he turned 40, and then, it was only because Zeke was sick and he wanted to be there to help shoulder the burden of the Python’s duties. Who knew he’d be so damn good at it that he’d want to stick around?

But even sticking around for the Pythons was a far cry from settling down the way a man was meant to settle down when he had children. Kids needed stability. A good home, caring parents, a provider to put food on the table and be there for the big moments…would he even be cut out for the job?

The truth was, the idea of being a parent was far scarier than getting into a knife fight with five other guys. Being a parent meant you had to be present, do the feeling thing. Not just with the kid, but with the mother. His own father had done his best, but he was still absent most of the time. What if Blade was the same way?

Maybe he should run. Get the hell out of there before he was saddled with the responsibility of raising a child that he would ultimately fail in the end, and disappointing the only woman he’d ever started to give two shits about in his life. She was going to be disappointed one way or the other, if he was going to be honest with himself. He couldn’t imagine himself being a good husband or father. Maybe he would be doing them both a favor if he just moved on.

Blade sighed heavily.  Whether he was going to be a parent or not, one thing was for sure. He needed a drink. And a goddamn stiff one.

Blade headed downstairs, doing everything humanely possible to avoid looking down the hallway to where the door of Michelle’s room happened to be. He slumped down on one of the bar stools. The crowd was beginning to thin, most of the guys were heading out to check out the car show the town over, but Blade had no interest- especially now.

To his surprise, a few stools over, Brett was sitting by himself, nursing a bourbon and cola, a faraway look in his eye. Blade felt a sudden overwhelming pang of guilt. He’d nearly killed the poor kid because he was worried that he might be sleeping with Michelle. He was definitely not father material.

“What can I get you, Blade?”

At the sound of Blade’s name, Brett looked up, a mixture of fear and resolve on his face.

Blade tried to ignore him. “The usual, man. The hardest you’ve got.”

“On it,” Jackal said dutifully.

A few moments later, he had a cool glass in his hands and was standing up from the bar to move to one of the booths farthest away. He couldn’t stand being so near Brett right now. He had a lot on his mind. And although he had told Michelle not to apologize for stupid shit, for some reason he was tempted to break his rule. But it would take a bit of liquid courage to get on with it.

“Blade?”

Blade tensed up at the sound of Brett’s voice.

“What’s up, kid?” he mumbled, taking a long drink.

“Is it all right if I sit here?” Brett asked.

Blade sighed and nodded, though it felt like his head was stuck in tar. All he wanted was to be alone and to finish his goddamn drink. Was that really so much to ask?

“Thanks,” Brett said, making himself comfortable across from Blade. He’d gotten a refill on his drink and Blade sighed, unable to meet him in the eyes. He’d nearly choked the life out of a gay man for being there for Michelle when she needed a friend. What kind of stupid asshole was he?

“Listen,” Blade mumbled, completely unprepared for the apology but knowing there was nothing else for him to say. “I shouldn’t have choked you like that. I didn’t know…”

Brett interrupted. “You don’t know a lot of things,” he said. “Like how my ex used to do the same thing, only he wouldn’t let go. You could have killed me in there and if you’re that prone to fits of violence, then I should really tell you that this little thing you’ve got going with Michelle? That isn’t going to be healthy for her. She just barely got away from one control freak and she doesn’t need another one in her life.”

“You think I would ever lay a hand on a woman?” Blade asked, his temper prickling again. Maybe he should have finished the job when he’d had the chance.

“I can’t pretend to know you or anything about you. I’m just giving you a fair warning. She deserves better than someone who is going to treat her how you treated me, without even knowing anything about what was going on. It was uncalled for!”

Brett huffed and then guzzled down a good portion of his drink.

“You’ve got some guts talking to me like that boy,” Blade said. “I can respect that. And I appreciate you looking out for Michie. Only one she has to talk to around here is Jo, but I’d wager she’s scared to death to tell Jo about the two of us.”

“Well I’m not looking for your approval, Blade. I’ve stopped caring what people think of me a long time ago. It’s better that way.”

“Cheers to that, little man,” Blade said, raising his glass. Brett looked surprised and raised his glass. “I am sorry about what happened in there, you know. It was impulsive and bull-headed. Which usually keeps me out of trouble, believe it or not. I was just trying to…”

“What? Protect Michelle?” Brett asked with small smile. “She doesn’t need that kind of protection. She’s got a good head on her shoulders. Granted, it will take her some time to get over what’s happened with her husband, but still…”

“I just can’t believe she’s pregnant,” Blade said, his voice hushed. “I swear to god, if it belongs to that good for nothing husband of hers…”

Brett leaned back and studied Blade. “You really care about her, don’t you?” he asked. “I half expected you to say you were afraid it would be yours. But you’re more worried that she’ll stay tied to her husband.”

“You’re damn right I’m worried!” Blade said. “And I’m worried if it’s mine too, you know? I don’t think I’m father material. Would you want me to raise your kids?”

Brett laughed and raised an eyebrow. “I wouldn’t rule it out, but I’m pretty sure my fiancé would have choice words to say about it.”

Blade froze. He’d always thought being flirted with by a man would make him want to tear the guy’s balls off, but Brett was just teasing him. It gave him a new perspective on things that he hadn’t expected.

“Well anyway, if it’s mine, I’ll find some way to mess up,” Blade said, changing the subject.

“You can’t know that,” Brett said. “You might end up surprising everybody. Especially yourself.”

“I’ve never been around kids, though!” Blade exclaimed. “I wouldn’t know the first thing.”

“That’s the kind of thing you can learn,” Brett reassured him. “There are all kinds of resources out there for you if you just choose to step up and take responsibility.”

“Yeah, well we’ll see what Michelle has to say about that,” Blade mumbled.

Brett smiled. “That’s where I can’t help you. She’s a strong woman, that one. Had a few hard knocks but she bounces back strong from what I can tell so far. Seems like the two of you would be a good match. I don’t see what you’re being so secretive about anyway.”

“It’s complicated,” Blade mumbled dismissively.

But was it really? What if Brett was right and they had been making a huge deal out of nothing? In fact, it felt so much like a truth he wanted to wrap his head around. He wanted badly to be wrong about being with Michelle.

“Love is always complicated,” Brett said, sipping his drink and eyeing Blade knowingly.

Blade balked at the L word. He hadn’t even thought of applying it here. Not with the way everything had been going. He had been so preoccupied with trying to keep himself from falling for Michelle that he had been completely oblivious to the fact that he was completely head over heels in love with her. What the hell was wrong with him?

“Right,” was all he said, taking a deep drink from his glass. Love. Weird. That was a first.

“Look, I hope you don’t mind, but I’d rather you not tell Jo about what happened between us tonight. It would really upset her and I don’t want her to go thinking that just because I’m gay I can’t take care of myself,” Brett said. “If it’s not too much trouble, could we just keep this between us?”

Blade laughed. “Sure, little dude. She’d kill me if she knew anyway.”

Brett’s eyes twinkled. “I know.”

Blade chuckled and shook his head. “So what’s your deal, anyway? You just go around making it your business to get in the middle of things?”

“Nah,” Brett said, a distant look in his eye. “I just like helping people.”

“Well you’re helping me loads by not telling Jo I nearly strangled you to death,” Blade said. “So here’s to you.”

He raised his glass and Brett met it with a solid clink.

“It’s been a pleasure,” Brett said after downing the rest of his drink and standing from the booth.

“Yeah right,” Blade said with a grin. “But it was cool talking to you. Feel free to come around again if you feel like it.”

“Oh, I’ll be around,” Brett said.

There was something in the tone of his voice that made Blade prickle. Some kind of hidden meaning to Brett’s words. But what the hell could this small guy be hiding? If there was one thing Blade didn’t tolerate, it was secrets in his MC. He would get the truth out of the kid one way or another.

But not tonight.

Tonight, he was just going to watch the boy leave and then finish his fuckin’ drink. Now though, instead of feeling like a sorry sack of shit, he was actually wondering if maybe being a dad would be something he could manage. If the squirt thought he could pull it off, maybe he could.

Blade shook his head and slammed his empty glass on the table. Whether he could pull it off or not, he would have to find a way to win Michelle back. Even if the baby wasn’t his, he would be there for the woman he loved. Because apparently that’s what love meant. Sticking around.

Chapter 15

Michelle woke up the next morning feeling sick to her stomach, but she wasn’t sure whether it was because she was nervous about what the doctor was going to say or if it was morning sickness. Once she threw up though, she had a pretty clear idea.

Brett was waiting outside, his bright red car parked beside a row of motorcycles. He was staring at his watch and tapping his foot impatiently.

“We’re going to be late if we don’t hurry!” he exclaimed, opening the door for her and then climbing into the driver’s seat.

“Relax, Brett,” Michelle laughed. “It only takes us like 12 minutes to get to town from here.”

Still, Brett’s anxiety didn’t diminish until the second they crossed the threshold into the waiting room. Michelle explained about her appointment and then she was left in the waiting room with Brett, who had visibly relaxed since his white-knuckled drive to the doctor’s office.

“Do you think getting tested for a baby will hurt?” Michelle asked. The truth was that she had never considered any of what having a child might entail. Sure, she had daydreamed about one day having the perfect little family- one where Alan was the kind and doting breadwinner and she was able to stay at home with the little ones and see to it that they had a great upbringing. But needless to say, all of those dreams had gone out the window and they would never come back again.

“I’m sure it won’t hurt,” Brett said quickly. “They’ll probably just have you pee in a cup.”

Michelle sighed and nodded and waited until it was her turn.

“Michelle Warren?”

Michelle’s heart thudded hard in her chest.

Whatever the doctor had to say to her about this would determine the rest of her life. If the pregnancy test was right and she was expecting a child, she would probably have to leave the MC. She wouldn’t force Blade into taking care of a baby that he didn’t want. It was time for her to start thinking about her best plan of action.

Brett had promised to help her go over her options when they found out for sure whether or not she was pregnant, and she suddenly found herself wishing she had had that conversation with him before the appointment. Now, she felt like she was grasping at air with nothing beneath her to catch her in case she fell.

“Yes, that’s me,” Michelle said, standing up awkwardly. Her legs were like jelly, and she stepped forward toward the kind-looking nurse, her heart constricted tightly in her chest.

She would be fine. Even if it meant that she had to find somewhere to live outside of the MC’s protection, she would find a place where Alan couldn’t get to her. Right?

But the uncertainty of the situation made her want to cry and the nurse looked at her with an understanding smile and touched her shoulder kindly.

“Let’s go,” she said.

Michelle nodded and glanced back at Brett as one last tendril of panic fought its way through her.

“Good luck!” he said in a stage whisper. “I’ll be here when you get back.”

Michelle nodded. She would just have to brave this part out by herself. Who knew? Maybe from then on, she would have a baby to take along for the ride.

***

“Michie, are you all right?”

“For the last time, Blade, go away. I don’t want to see you right now.”

“But…”

“I said no!”

“I made you something to eat. You can’t just keep on going without food. Especially not with a baby in you. You’re eating for two now.”

Michelle opened the door and glared Blade in the eye.

“That’s none of your business,” she growled. “After the way you treated the only man who’s been here for me through this, do you think I’d eat anything you made me? I don’t even want to talk to you!”

Blade glared at her.

“Look, me and the little dude are square about that now. You’re the only one here holding a grudge!”

“Yeah! And I’m also the only one carrying a baby,” Michelle retorted.

“Christ! You’re acting like I did something to hurt you. All I’ve ever done is to try to be there for you and you’re treating me like I’m nothing but some common criminal!” Blade exclaimed, his eyes furiously blue as he stared down at her.

“You kind of are, Blade! The MC is under surveillance for a reason!”

Blade scoffed. “Yeah! Because of you. Don’t act like I wasn’t willing to step up for you and the baby, Michelle. You didn’t even tell me about it! You told Brett before I even had any idea! I thought we were closer than that!”

Blade stormed off, letting the door close in Michelle’s face. She stared at his back and felt another surge of anger course through her. Not only was he acting as if he hadn’t been on the same page as she was about being just friends, but now he was practically blaming her for not knowing how to break the news to him. Was it such a crime to want to be sure about something before you turned someone else’s life upside down? Apparently to Blade it was. He was the most stubborn, selfish man she had ever met.

Well, technically that title went to Alan, but still. Blade was a close second.

And for the past month, he had thought that making her food she didn’t want to touch and asking how she was would make up for the fact that he had assaulted one of the gentlest people she’d ever met. She just couldn’t let it go. Not when it meant that she would be agreeing to let him into her life with a baby involved. It was just too risky. She couldn’t let herself be with another man like Alan. To be honest, seeing his temper like that, right there in front of her, had been a terrifying reminder of all the horrible things she had gone through with her soon-to-be ex-husband.

But she couldn’t find a way to tell that to Blade. No matter how hard he tried to make things up to her and take care of Michelle and the baby, there was just nothing he could do to erase that memory of his temper from her mind. She was afraid of him. Plain and simple. But the one thing she had learned from being with Alan was that if a man scared you that way, you would be much, much better off if he didn’t know it.

Michelle sighed. Being cooped up in the MC all the time was starting to drive her crazy. She listened at the door for a few moments to make sure that Blade was nowhere in sight before sneaking downstairs. She took the secret path in the back of the club to escape onto the road, where she was finally able to have a breath by herself.

Well, she wasn’t technically alone. Somewhere in her womb was the beginning of a child, who may look like her, or who could possibly favor Blade. It seemed impossible that Blade would have a child who looked anything less than identical to him. Everything about him was strong and fierce. His genetic code was probably just as headstrong.

Michelle strolled along absently, letting all of her anxieties and worries melt away. It was nice having some time to clear her head. She certainly wasn’t getting any with Blade and she hadn’t been able to call Jo for an escape to her house. If she did, she knew that she would let the pregnancy slip and more importantly, who the father was.

And not only that, but she knew Jo well enough by then to know that there would be a big hullaballoo about how great it was that Blade was a father. Jo would push him to step up and Michelle would feel obligated in a way to accept him. She just wasn’t ready for that level of attention yet. Especially when she was still so angry and afraid of him.

“Well look who I have here,” a familiar, chilling voice said suddenly.

“No,” Michelle whispered, whipping around.

Michelle’s blood turned to ice as she came face to face with her worst nightmare. Alan grinned, looking her up and down with an evil smirk on his face. She should have stayed in the MC. What the hell had she been thinking?

“You look different,” Alan said, peering at her closely. “Did you gain weight or something? I don’t think I like it.”

She wanted to defy him, to take some of the attitude of the bikers she had grown to love and, and tell Alan to go fuck himself. But the words wouldn’t come. When she was alone with him, she was frozen. He had done a number on her, physically and mentally. She wasn’t prepared to face him. Not now. Not alone.

“Well, I’m sure you’ll get back to your old self in no time,” Alan said. “Put you back in one of those pretty little dresses we bought you. Like the ones for the dinners at the department. You always did look sexy in those.”

“What do you want, Alan?” Michelle asked, finally finding her voice.

“I want my wife to come home, where she belongs,” Alan said, his eyes beady and cold.

The idea of going back with Alan terrified her. Michelle looked frantically for an escape route – anything she could do to try to outsmart him and run like hell – but they were on an open dirt road, with a field on one side and forest on the other. Unfortunately, Alan was standing between Michelle and the cover of the trees, so her position wasn’t ideal, to say the least.

Again, she tried to find her voice, but there was nothing she could say to take the sadistic smile off his face, and it would be foolish to even try.

“Please,” she whispered.

“I don’t owe you anything,” Alan said. “You ran away from me like I was some sort of a monster! Do you have any idea how that makes me feel?”

“Alan…”

But there was nothing she could say to reason with him. She already knew that.

“Who’s that biker guy everyone keeps seeing you around with?” Alan asked, his voice suddenly dark.

“I don’t know who you…”

“Don’t play dumb with me!” Alan shouted, stepping toward Michelle and grabbing her arm. “I’ve seen pictures of the two of you! You think the officers on duty here just twiddle their thumbs here?”

“No,” Michelle growled. “They answer to you, don’t they? And the only reason they’re here is because for the first time in my life, I’ve had the courage to do what was best for me!”

“What is best for you is to go home!” Alan roared, shaking Michelle’s arm hard. She grimaced in pain, though she knew that it was only going to get worse.

“What makes you think you know what’s best for everyone?”

Michelle and Alan both froze at the sound of a deep voice to their left and Michelle’s heart soared. Blade was standing there, with an entourage of bikers standing behind him, each of them reaching into their back pockets to pull out their weapons of choice.

“You stay out of this! I know what you’ve been doing with my wife!” Alan screamed, tightening his grip on Michelle’s wrist.

“Oh, so you know she’s pregnant with my kid, then,” Blade said, smiling smugly. This was as much a shock to the other bikers as it was to Alan, and everybody murmured to themselves as Alan’s face went from flesh-toned to deep red.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about!” Alan exclaimed, raising his hand to strike Michelle. “You whore!”

Before Alan had a chance to make contact with Michelle, Blade was in between them, his huge, muscular body creating a barrier between Michelle and Alan. Michelle scrambled to join the protective group of bikers, but before she could, Alan used one of his police moves to roll out of Blade’s way and jump to his feet again. He tore at Michelle with everything he had. Blade whipped around just in time to see Michelle fall to the ground hard.

Pain engulfed her every nerve ending and she writhed on the ground.

“Somebody help her up!” Blade demanded, taking a swing at Alan that missed. “You should not have done that, pigfucker.”

Alan’s eyes narrowed and Michelle suddenly felt her body become weightless as two of the bikers carried her to the side of the road and sat her down gently.

“Are you all right, Michie?” Blade shouted over the sounds of Alan’s growling. Michelle gazed at Blade beating the holy hell out of Alan, her mind in a fog. She nodded dumbly, not sure what else to do.

“I’m going to kill you!” Alan shrieked again, lunging at Blade and growling furiously. Everybody groaned as a sickening thud filled the air and suddenly Alan was lying on the ground, unconscious.

“You stupid shit!” Blade shouted down to him. “You’re lucky I don’t fuckin’ kill you right now!”

But Alan couldn’t hear him and Michelle suddenly felt a shooting pain up her abdomen. She bent over, moaning out loudly.

“Michie!”

She lost consciousness just in time to feel Blade’s strong hands around her shoulders as she slumped lifelessly against his broad chest.

Something was wrong with the baby.

Chapter 16

“I understand how you feel, sir, but we’re only allowed to disclose information to…”

“Is she all right or not?!” Blade’s voice boomed through the waiting room cluttered with bikers.

“Sir, if you don’t lower your voice, I’m going to have to…”

“Just answer the question!” Blade exclaimed. “What’s so hard about that?!”

“Sir, it is in the patient’s best interest that we only disclose information to her family. I know you’re friends, but…”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Blade said, holding his hand up.

He was one more excuse away from beating the shit out of the little man he’d seen wheeling Michelle away on the gurney. Blade knew that guy knew what was going on with her. He just refused to tell him.

“Sir. Like I said. Family only.”

“We are her family! Her husband? The one you have written down on all those official looking forms of yours? That’s the piece of shit who did this to her. We’re more of a family to her than that piece of shit will ever be and if you don’t let us in to see her right now, you’re going to see what the power of family can do!”

The rest of the bikers present, sensing a threat, stood up and put on their most intimidating faces. The doctor shifted nervously and was quiet for a moment before letting out a defeated little sigh.

“She’s in room 321. But for crying out loud, one at a time, please. She can tell you herself how she’s doing.”

Blade’s entire body felt as if a boulder was lifted off it and he took off down the hall toward room 321. Truth be told, he had never been more scared in all his life than when Michelle had passed out on the side of the road. He had been too scared to even step on the pigfucker’s throat for doing it to her in the first place. They had just left him passed out on county road, with the very real possibility of a coyote coming upon his body and finishing him off. It would serve the asshole right.

“Blade,” Michelle said tiredly when he burst through the door. She laughed a little. “You look wild.”

Blade stood rigid and took the chance to stare at Michelle. She looked incredible, even in a hospital gown. The color was back in her cheeks, thank Christ, and she was sitting up weakly in the bed to greet him.

“No, don’t get up. You need your rest right now,” Blade said, walking closer to the bed. How did she manage to be so completely stunning even when she looked like death warmed over?

“It’s nothing really. It was just too much stress. The baby couldn’t handle it…”

“Is it all right?” Blade asked, a new sense of fear overwhelming him. How was it possible that he was just as scared for an unborn child as he was for a woman he had grown to know and love over the past few months? It seemed incredible.

“Yes,” Michelle said. “They even told me that if I want to come back in about three weeks, I could get an ultrasound done. See if Blade Jr. is a boy or a girl.”

“Blade Jr.,” he chuckled. “That’s a hell of a name.”

“Tell me about it,” Michelle said, raising an eyebrow.

They fell silent for a moment, each of them ruminating over what had happened between them over the past few weeks. None of it felt good. He would give anything to make sure that she was all right, but she was tired and didn’t need his shit in her life. He couldn’t blame her.

“Look,” Blade said, shifting uncomfortably. “I’m really glad the two of you are all right. And I know we’re kind of not doing this whole…I don’t know…friendship thing right now, but you had me fuckin’ worried out there. But now that I know everything’s fine, I think I’ll just let you get your rest.”

“Wait,” Michelle said quietly as Blade turned to leave. He paused, hoping against hope that what she had to say wasn’t just another “fuck off,” or just a “thanks for getting me medical attention when I needed it so I didn’t die by the roadside.”

“Blade, I’ve been struggling with something for a long time now, ever since what happened between you and Brett.”

“Oh yeah?”

Blade had been dreading hearing more about what had happened with Brett. He was not only ashamed of himself for it, but it was a painful reminder of just how badly he managed to fuck up a delicate situation with Michelle. Ever since then, he hadn’t been able to get her out of his head for longer than six seconds.

“There’s something about what happened then that just really changed the way I felt around you, you know?”

“No, not really. Only kind of. You’d better make it clear for me. I have a thick skull,” Blade said, knocking on his temple. This brought the hint of a smile to Michelle’s lips. It was progress.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is, when you burst into my bedroom like that, a space where I’m supposed to feel safe, it really scared me. And then, when you got violent with sweet little Brett…”

Blade looked down at the ground sheepishly.

“Yeah,” he agreed. “That wasn’t cool.”

“It really wasn’t. And Brett’s really a big man for being able to let that go, you know.”

Blade shrugged. It wasn’t up to him whether the people who Blade roughed up were able to get over it or not. Still, he did kind of feel bad about the guy. He was just trying to help.

“Anyway,” Michelle said with a sigh. “Seeing Alan again made me realize that you’re not the man I was afraid you were. You were just trying to protect me and all this time I’ve just been too afraid of you to face you again. Does that make sense? I get now that you were just trying to protect me from Brett, too. You heard me crying and knew he was up there.”

“Yeah,” Blade said, shocked at the revelation. He knew he was an intimidating guy, but he had never thought about how that might come across to Michelle. Especially so soon after being with her abusive husband. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s all right,” Michelle said. “You were just looking out for me. Nobody has ever done that before. At least not since I left the MC. And I doubt anybody ever will again if I leave.”

“That’s not true,” Blade said, quick to defend Michelle from herself. “If you wanted to leave, anybody you ran into would be lucky as hell. And if they didn’t know it, then they’re a bunch of fuckin’ idiots.”

Michelle grinned and shook her head. “Thanks.”

Blade nodded and they fell into a loaded silence. Suddenly, Michelle spoke again.

“Do you want to come and see the ultrasound with me?” she asked shyly. “I mean, it’s your kid, too.”

Blade was shocked.

“You mean like, see the little bean in your belly on like an x-ray screen?”

Michelle smiled. “Something like that.”

“I’d be honored,” Blade said, moving quickly to her side and kissing her hand. “I’ll do anything you want me to do during this thing. This is my baby, too. And if you want me to be there, I will be. If you don’t, I can split. That’s all right too. I can pay you and make sure the kid has good clothes and a nice school, but if you think I can’t be a dad or I’d be a bad influence, then…”

“What?” Michelle said, furrowing her brow at him as if he were the biggest idiot in the world. “Of course, you’ll be involved. If you want to be. And if you want to be a good dad, you will be. I know you have it in you.”

Blade’s heart warmed at the words. He had been terrified about this for so long that now that it was happening, her encouragement meant everything to him.

“I’m glad you feel that way. But really, however you want to do this baby thing is fine.”

“I know. And thank you for making that clear.”

Blade nodded and then sighed deeply. “I should probably get out of here.”

“Already?”

“Well…we kinda threatened the guy to let us in here,” Blade said, grinning. “So technically I’m not even supposed to be here. But the guys and I were worried about you.”

Michelle laughed and slapped his arm. “What the hell? Poor Dr. Dorian. He’s going to love it when we come back in for the ultrasound.”

Blade snorted. “He’ll probably remember us and give us a picture of an alien baby or something.”

Michelle burst out laughing and smiled fondly at Blade. “You’re pretty hard to forget…I really missed you. When I get home, we should have a talk.”

“Sure,” Blade said, the heavy weight on his chest that had been there since their fallout finally lifting. “I’d love to.”

Michelle smiled at him and Blade nodded formally. Maybe things weren’t going to be so bad after all.

Chapter 17

“I’m fine!” Michelle exclaimed, slapping Blade’s hands away from her as she slowly climbed the stairs up to her room.

“But the doctor said no stress,” Blade informed her.

It was almost cute how literal he was being with the doctor’s instructions but Michelle wasn’t sure she was enjoying being treated like porcelain. It wasn’t fun being robbed of her independence.

“I know what the doctor said, Blade, because he said it to me!”

Blade was silent and continued holding Michelle’s arm stubbornly until she reached the top of the stairs. He was sweet, underneath all that muscle and attitude. She had to give him that.

“All right,” Blade said gently, opening the doorway and ushering into the bedroom like she was about to break. “In you go.”

He helped her down into the bed and turned to leave.

“Blade, wait. I don’t feel like being alone right now. Would you mind keeping me company?”

Blade looked surprised at first, then pleased. “Of course.”

He sat down beside Michelle on the bed and the tension between their bodies was immediate. If it didn’t feel so good to have him so close to her, she would have regretted inviting him to stay.

When Blade looked at her again, the longing in his eyes was undeniable. She had to admit, she’d been thinking of him more and more since his visit at the hospital. She’d come clean to him about how she felt and he’d been respectful of it. It was a complete change from what would have happened with Alan.

“What’s the matter?” Blade asked, perceptive to every subtle change in her face. He was looking for signs she was suffering, being hypervigilant about her health after her fainting spell.