Chapter 37
Elene
"What?"
The way I utter the word makes me sound like an idiot, and I’m incapable of formulating anything else. I can't believe what she's telling me. Miss Barry had been standing right outside the door to our dressing room when I almost ran into her, in a hurry to get upstairs to take my position, like I do every evening.
Up until a few seconds ago, it was a night like any other. I got to the club around eight-thirty, chatted with Sandi who started working her shift an hour earlier, and then went to the dressing room to change, or rather, to undress. For the past few weeks, I've only been wearing the black silk kimono and black flat-heeled sandals. I always removed both articles as soon as I stepped into the black velvet room, and then lowered myself to the floor to wait for him, kneeling with my head down.
Ever since the first night that he fucked me, he has shown up every single night, never making me wait long. Sometimes, he'd step through the curtain just a minute after I'd taken my position, making me wonder if he'd already been at the club and had just been waiting for me to get ready for him.
My deal with him was clearly spelled out and agreed to by Miss Barry, who promised not to interfere unless we were somehow disturbing other club guests.
This is why her words aren’t making any sense to me. When I bumped into her standing outside the dressing room, with her hands on the hips and her red painted lips pursed in a thin, solemn line, I didn't even consider that she might want to talk to me. Judging from her rather annoyed and impatient expression, I figured one of the other girls had messed up and was in for a reprimand.
She had been waiting for me, though. I followed her to her office, my hands clasped together and head lowered, a slew of silent questions running wildly through my head. I couldn’t figure out what I may have done wrong. She gestured for me to sit down opposite her desk, my eyes flying to the clock on the wall, worried that this meeting would make me late for my date with Damon.
And then she told me in a cold, monotonous voice that there was no date. That the room was no longer being paid for, and that Damon was no longer a VIP member of The Velvet Rooms.
My mouth fell open and my eyes widened in disbelief, as I frantically tried to comprehend what this development meant for me, for us.
"I can no longer reserve that room under your private contract," Miss Barry says, repeating her previous statement, but using different phrasing. "Sir Graves is no longer paying for the room, and he's no longer a VIP member of this establishment."
Sir Graves. He hates to be called that. My insides twist in anger.
"Why? What happened?" I demand. "Did he just... cancel?"
Miss Barry sighs, visibly annoyed by my shocked reaction.
"I can't go into detail, and you know that, Elene," she says, raising an eyebrow in warning. "Client confidentiality. All you need to know is that he's no longer coming here and you no longer have exclusive rights to that room. You're free to return to your normal shifts at the club."
She pauses, clearing her throat. "The choice is up to you whether you want to be an angel or a devil. Devils are in higher demand, and the pay would be better."
I just sit there, staring at her as if she'd just given me my death sentence.
This can't be happening. What's going on? She must be lying. I shake my head in disbelief.
"Are you sure you're not confusing something?" I ask. "He didn't mention anything last night about no longer meeting with me, and-"
"Elene," she cuts me off. "I'm not confusing anything. I was contacted by his financial adviser today."
"So, you didn't speak to him directly?" I prod, my heart racing with hope. "You didn't hear it directly from him? He never said that-"
"I may as well have heard it from him," she interrupts me again. "His adviser said he was speaking on Sir Grave's behalf."
She lets out a deep sigh, supporting herself on her elbows as she leans forward on her desk. "I don't know why this is so shocking to you. Clients come and go all the time, you of all people should know that."
Her eyes study mine, searching them for something I'm not willing to divulge. I know her gaze holds a warning, a silent reminder for me to remember my position. It's the same look I received from Sandi, the same look I've been giving friends when they were in danger of falling into the same trap I just have.
Never fall for a client. No matter what they do with or for you, no matter how intense and intimate the time is that you spend together — it's not real. None of it is real. They play their part just as much as you do. And when they fear things are getting out of hand, they leave.
That's what must have happened here. Damon and I have spent every single night together the past two weeks, he arranged and paid for me to be available only to him with an exclusive contract, something I've never done before. Things between us were wonderful, too wonderful. It was all too good to be true.
His sudden disappearance is proof of that.
I grit my teeth, pressing my lips together as I hold back the tears threatening to blind me. Shit, not in front of the madam. She can't see me cry like a rookie, like one of those dumb teenage girls who don't know the rules of the game. I'm a fucking pro at this. I know how things work here. I should have known better.
"So, what should I sign you up for?" Miss Barry asks coolly, seemingly oblivious to my inner turmoil.
I swallow hard, casting the painful thoughts aside so I can finish this conversation with her with my dignity still intact.
"Actually, I would like to take tonight off," I whisper, trying to play off a touch of shakiness in my voice as a dry throat.
She nods. "You weren't on the schedule tonight to begin with, so that won't pose a problem."
I throw her a quick smile, trying to express my gratitude without words, and rise quickly from my seat. I need to get out of here. Right the fuck now.
I turn on my heel, ready to dart toward the door, when she calls my name.
"Let me know your decision tomorrow," she says, as my eyes trail back over my shoulder. "We could really use another devil like you, Elene. Please think about it."
"I will," I promise, turning the doorknob and darting out of the room in one quick leap.
I lose my composure as soon as I’m away from Miss Barry's strict gaze. My hand flies up to my mouth, purposefully hiding half of my face as it contorts into an ugly cry that I don't want anyone to see.
I lower my gaze, hiding it behind my blonde waves. I hurry back to the dressing room, stopping myself from jogging, so as to not draw too much attention to myself. I can't stop the hot tears from spilling any longer, and I don't want to. I just want to be alone, hidden somewhere in the dark, where I can cry my eyes out.
I wish I could go up to our room, even though I know he's not coming tonight. It would comfort me in a way that nothing else can right now. It's the closest thing I have to him, the only memory. Our sanctuary. A simple, black room, cushioned in tufted walls and black velvet curtains.
My heart breaks for the girl I used to be just a day ago. A girl full of joy and hope for something she never thought attainable.
And now it's gone. Because that girl was just like the rookies, stupid and naive.
My eyes catch the entrance located near the main guest area, as I make my way down the dark hallway. Soft music and the mumble of voices pervade my solitude, revealing the superficial world I was once a part of.
The urge to throw up torments my insides.
I know what I'll have to do. It's a long overdue decision.
I'll have to talk to Miss Barry.