8

 

CARINA

 

A grin widens my face before I can stop it, the feeling more foreign than the emotions raging through me. Why is it only Mateo draws this out of me? What’s so special about him that he’s able to accomplish what others have not been able to for years? The last time I felt this … much was before my father took me down into the …

Squeezing my eyes tight, I will the thoughts to leave me as I continue making my way toward the stairs that lead down to the first floor. I’m too lost in my own mind and thoughts of my brother to appreciate the opulence of the décor strewn throughout the hallway. Too lost in myself to stop and gawk at the priceless, breathtakingly gorgeous stained-glass windows that piece together a story of victory and the bloodshed it cost to get there.

It isn’t until I hear scuffling on the foyer floor that I stop in my tracks, glancing down at the commotion. Resting my hand on the balcony, I lean over, my eyes catching on Vinny’s as he stares up at me with … fascination? Intrigue? I can’t say that I can properly decode how he’s looking at me right now, but it causes a shiver of unease to work its way up my spine.

“What’s wrong?”

Leave it to Mateo to notice my vibes. “I … I don’t know,” I retort, turning my head to catch a glimpse of the worry shining through his dark orbs. “Your brother is looking at me like I’m … like I’m some treasure or something.”

Everything slows down to a snail’s pace around us, as a genuine smile tugs at the corner of Mateo’s lips. It’s the most transfixing sight I’ve ever beheld in my life. It causes him to light up, where too much of the time, he spends in nothing but pure darkness.

“That’s because you are,” he whispers, his hand coming to rest on my lower back.

Scrunching my features, I keep my eyes trained on him, trying to figure out what he’s playing at. How can this be the man that treated me so harshly when he first brought me to his home? How can this be the man who’s caused me nothing but painful emotions?

“Why … how?” I ask.

“What?”

Sighing, I break our gaze and stare back at the man steadily climbing the stairs. “How can you change so drastically in such a short amount of time? Why are you being nice to me when I know that’s not who you truly are?”

“I need—” he starts to say, but he’s interrupted by his brother.

“Teo, I need to talk to you,” Vinny inserts, flicking his eyes over to me. “An updated picture of Marco just came through from one of my connections, and … Jesus, man, you’re not going to beli …”

Just as those words slip past his lips, the sound of a pop and glass shattering force me into action. I’ve heard that sound before. I spent many nights playing it over and over in my mind.

We have a shooter.

My heart kicks up in my chest as I grab Mateo by the biceps, tackling him to the ground. Throwing myself over him, a few more rounds pump through the air, more glass shattering as it rains down on top of me. But, all I can do is focus on the man that’s lying underneath me and his molten chocolate eyes gazing intently into my own, our lips ghosting each other’s.

His chest rises and falls swiftly as he continues to mutely stare up at me with lightness glimmering in his eyes. Just a few centimeters rests between our parted lips. I never knew … Is it supposed to feel this good being pressed against someone?

Taking my bottom lip between my teeth, thoughts of him pressing his lips against mine start barreling through my thoughts. The kiss we shared when I woke up from my coma. The feel of his hands as they roamed across my flesh like he couldn’t get enough of me. Everything that happened between us in that bed blazes through my mind making me want more.

Before we can react to our closeness, someone grabs my arm to pull me off him. Being so in the moment with Mateo, I fight against the person, aiming to do damage. My leg kicks out, connecting with hard, solid muscles, as a soft grunt flows from their lips.

“Jesus jump up Christ!” Dom’s voice yells out, his hands clutching me tighter. “Carina, get off him, so we can get him out of here!”

Just then, the sounds of someone gasping breaks through the thunderous roar of blood in my ears. I push away from Mateo, and he catches sight of what my eyes are trained on.

Vinny lying in a pool of his blood, gasping as his unfocused eyes stare up at the ceiling.

“Goddammit!”

Fury I’ve never felt before sizzles through my body. Reaching down, I unholster Mateo’s gun, not caring that he tries to stop me. Punting his hand away, I narrow my eyes on his. Something he must see in my gaze causes him to relinquish the weapon to me.

Running over to the window, I don’t take even a moment to second-guess my actions or how wrong this could all end if I make even one misstep. I throw caution to the wind as I jump up onto window seal, kicking the rest of the glass out with my boot. Dropping down into a crouch, I aim my gun, searching for the shooter that dared to shoot a house that’s under my protection.

My protection? Something in my gut churns as it locks into place. I see this, and all the people inside, as my personal mission to protect. Even though one of their men is my intended target, there’s … I just won’t be able to go through with it now. I have to protect them.

Protect them from the vile shit trying to destroy them.

“No! Vinny!” Mateo’s voice, filled with anguish, bellows through the air. I want nothing more than to go to him, to help them. But I can’t take my focus off this right now. I force my eyes to focus, as I bring the gun up, zeroing in on the figure racing through the trees. They’re small in stature, almost feminine in appearance. Who the hell could do this and think they’ll get away with it?

Holding my breath, I focus all my energy in scoping this person out. Settling my finger on the trigger, I inhale deeply and hold my breath, then release it slowly as I pull the trigger. A deafening noise rings out all around us, but I know I’ve hit my target. The wailing scream can be heard by me from where I’m hunched down. And I know, without a doubt, my shot was aimed to kill.

Jumping back down from the ledge, I drop the pistol and race over to the scene before me. I haven’t felt this in so long, as a lump forms in my throat and tears burn the back of my eyes. I see Mateo cradling Vinny to his chest, the rest of his men and brothers standing around him. Feverish tears cascade down his face as it twists in agony.

As much as I want to freak right now, thanks to these new emotions racing through me, I know I have to appear as stoic as possible so Mateo will feed off my calmness.

“The shooter is dead. About fifty paces northwest. Get them and bring them here.” I order, dropping to my knees beside Mateo. Thunderous footfalls race off at my command, thankfully.

I have no idea what I’m doing here. This is all new to me; new to the person I’ve been since my own brother died. I’m not one for consoling those that lose someone because more times than not, I’m the person that took them to begin with. However, something inside of me guides my hand to Mateo’s. It’s a soft voice filled with warmth and love.

“Mateo,” I whisper, my heart clawing at the back of my ribs when his tear-streaked face tilts up, his red rimmed eyes meeting mine. “Lay him down on his side, please.” When he doesn’t make a move to do as I say, I lean toward him, disregarding the growl that rumbles through his chest. He’s a man on the edge, and if I’m going to help, I need him to trust me.

It’s hard when I can’t even trust myself at this moment.

“Please,” I coax in a soft voice. “I’m going to see how bad it is.”

Unblinking, he continues to stare at me. “Fix him.”

“I’ll try,” I whisper past the lump in my throat.

Gently, he lays Vinny down on his side with the bullet holes facing upward. Leaning forward, I feel for the knife Mateo keeps strapped on him, jolting in shock when Mateo’s unforgiving hand lands on mine, clenching tightly.

“If you hurt him worse, I’ll kill you myself.”

I nod, and he releases my hand. Grabbing the knife, I flick it open and make quick work of Vinny’s shirt, then push it out of the way so I can inspect the wounds. My lips curl in distaste when I notice the wounds. Only one kind of bullet can leave a mark like this.

A man killer.

There’s no way I’ll be able to save Vinny. No way I’ll be able to keep my unspoken promise. His guts will be nothing but shreds of meat and muscle by the time that bullet is through with its course.

Hotness I’ve never felt before slides down the side of my face as my emotions live and breathe over my features for all to see. There’s no helping Vinny. The only thing we can do is be with him until he draws his final breath.

“Mateo,” I force out, feeling my soul break inside of me. “There’s nothing that can be done. They shot to kill. I’m so sorry.”

“Goddammit! Carina, save him!” he cries out.

“I-I can’t.” There’s never been a time in my life since my brother died that I’ve felt this helpless. It’s an emotion I know all too well. A feeling I wish would stay buried deep for no one to see. Mateo doesn’t need me to fall apart right now. He needs me to be strong.

Cradling him in his lap, Mateo starts rocking back and forth, running his fingers over Vinny’s quickly paling face. “I’m so sorry!” he cries out, sobbing. “I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you!”

It feels like a storm cloud slowly sliding over me as everything envelopes me in darkness. I have no idea how to process the number of emotions I’m forced to endure. It feels like I’m short-circuiting, and the only thing that can make me better is getting away from Mateo so I can seal this leak inside of me once and for all.

As I make to leave, a hand clasps around my wrist, freezing me on the spot. It’s clammy, cold, and slippery, so it causes me to take notice and not fight against it. Glancing down, Vinny’s unfocused eyes meet mine, causing a sob I didn’t even know I was holding back to climb up my throat.

I didn’t know him like the rest of them here, but during all of this, I proclaimed my protection on them all—Vinny included. Losing him is like losing my brother all over again, even though I was never close to him.

Gasping, his body shudders in Mateo’s lap as he fights to catch his breath. “It … It is our … darkest moments …” he forces out, wheezing harsher. “That we must focus … to see … the … light.”

It can’t be! There’s no way.

My eyes round in disbelief as Vinny’s hand falls away from my wrist. His words play in my mind over and over again, burrowing themselves even deeper than before.

There’s only one person who’s ever said those words to me. One person who took the time to worry about me and check to make sure that everything was okay.

How can Vinny know what my brother used to say to me every night before ending his calls? The soft words he used to utter to make everything seem right in the world.