Chapter Five
She wouldn’t touch him.
Beck kept his face painfully passive as he marched back to the tent Rhys had put together for the compatibility ritual. If everything had gone as it should have gone, he would have taken Meg back to this tent and very gently, respectfully made love to her in front of two witnesses. Rhys would have been one, and the vampires would have selected one. It was a simple ritual to prove he could take care of her sexually.
Instead, he had proven that he was an animal.
Now she wouldn’t look at him, and he didn’t blame her. He had to hold her tight because she refused to put her arms around his neck.
Cara was at the door to the tent and held it open as she eyed him. She looked at the pale female in his arms. Beck knew what she was seeing. She was looking with pity on the woman he had just married. He had treated her like a whore. Beck sighed inwardly. He avoided Cara’s eyes. He’d never treated a whore that way.
Beck laid her down as gently as he could on the bed that had been prepared for them. It was covered with thick, soft blankets and pillows. Flowers had been strewn—marigolds, St. John’s Wort, and shamrocks. It was a lovely setting and would have made a beautiful bridal bed. Instead, he’d shoved her to her knees in the middle of a bloody arena and throat-fucked her in front of a crowd.
He tried not to think about how soft and sweet she looked lying on the bed. There was nothing he wanted more than to climb into bed beside her and attempt in some way to make up for the way he had treated her. He wanted to kiss her and hold her. He wanted to tell her how much she was already coming to mean to him. He wanted to beg her forgiveness and promise to never, ever treat her that way again.
She wouldn’t believe him. He was obviously a man of no honor. He’d proven it in the arena today. If he had a shred of honor, he would walk away from her now. He could provide her with nothing but a dying brother and a ramshackle brugh on a meaningless plane of existence. He should allow Dante to take her to his plane. At least there she would be fed, clothed, and taken care of.
“Clean up.” His words were harsh to his own ears. “We leave in an hour.”
“Sire,” Cara blurted, looking startled. “Surely you cannot expect your bondmate to travel this evening.”
He stared down at the little gnome. He had been raised to be a king, and though he was no longer that man, he still expected to be obeyed without question. It had been bred into his character. A king never explained his actions, even when they were wrong. He was sure Cian would have knelt and explained himself to the small woman, but then, Cian would never have been in this mess in the first place. Cian would never have screwed up so badly with a woman that she couldn’t stand to look at him.
“If you have a problem with it, I’ll take her now,” he said softly.
The little gnome held her ground, but he could see it cost her. “No, Sire. I will make sure she is ready for the long and arduous journey.”
Beck strode to the door. He needed a bath, but he wouldn’t disturb hers. If things had gone as planned, he would have cleaned her up himself. He would have shown her how tender he could be. He would have eased into the hot tub with her, kissed her, and washed her hair.
“If she runs, I’ll hold you and yours personally responsible,” he growled. He was somewhat satisfied by her nervous nod.
The waning sunlight was still hot on his skin. That would change. He knew by nightfall the forest would be cold. If he took her out there, she would have no choice. She would have to cling to him for warmth and protection. Perhaps out in the forest she would begin to learn to trust him.
The former heir ignored those who called out greetings to him. He didn’t want to hear about his soon-to-be-legendary victory. The damn bards would be singing about it soon enough. They had no idea how close that victory had come to being a bloodbath. Only Meg’s sweet hand had stayed him, and she had paid for her interference. He left orders with the stable boy to get his horse ready then made his way to the river that ran near the marketplace. He tossed his shirt, boots, and trousers on the grass and dove in where he knew the water was deep and cold.
The chill hit his system like a bloody winter blast. He gritted his teeth against the bite of pain along his skin. He dove deep, refusing to come up for air or warmth. His lungs could handle it. He wrapped his hands around the strong reeds, anchoring himself to the bottom. It was quiet here. There was no incessant chatter. There was no one to constantly remind him of duties that were no longer his. They didn’t understand. He had been the deposed King of the Seelie for almost half his life now. Couldn’t they leave him be?
Beck watched a small school of fish swim by. The river was remarkably clear and lovely. It reminded him of the river that ran by the white palace in Tir na nÒg . His mother would take him, Cian, and their sister Bronwyn down, and she would sit with her ladies while they swam. Cian would splash their sister and tease her mercilessly, but Beck wasn’t able to join their fun. He was expected to act the king always.
“Eyes are always on you, son,” his father would say. “They expect Cian to act the fool, but you must be the warrior king every minute of your life.”
What would his father have thought of his actions this day? Would his father understand that life had dealt him a horrible set of cards and he’d played them the only way that made sense? Or would he turn away in shame? Beck rather thought it might be the latter.
All of his life he had been trained to ruthlessly hide the beast that lived inside him. His own mother had always told him that symbiotic twins were considered powerful, but everyone knew they were difficult to raise. The warrior half required balance to stop his violent nature from running wild. The intellectual half needed grounding or he spent his life in daydreams. It was only through bonding with a proper mate that the two halves could truly live balanced lives.
The bonding was a sacred act. It was a gift from the bondmate to her husbands. It was to be treasured and revered.
He had forced it on her when she didn’t even understand what she was accepting.
Finally his lungs burned, and he allowed himself to float toward the light. He broke the surface, taking a deep breath.
“I was wondering if you were going to put in an appearance or if you would allow the kelpies to take you.” Dante sat against a large tree, his long legs spread out in front of him. He had his tablet out and was playing with it. Beck knew Dante was very attached to his computer. He was constantly looking for downloads, better known as DLs. DLs consisted of everything from entertainment to education.
“There aren’t any kelpies here.” Beck smoothed his long, black hair from his face. “There are some kelpies in the forest, but none this close to a village.”
The forest where he was about to take his Meg was considered a bit dangerous. It was full of all sorts of nasty creatures.
Dante tossed him a bar of soap. It was pink. The vampire had probably stolen it from the females’ tent. Still, it would take the stink of battle off him. Beck soaped up, grateful for the cold. It was the first time since meeting Meg that he wasn’t uncomfortably hard.
Not true. There had been that moment after Meg had swallowed him down. Her throat had closed around him, and he’d shot his cum straight down. She’d taken every drop of him. Even after he was done, she had been so sweet and submissive. He’d wanted nothing more than to praise her for her gift to him. He’d wanted to haul her into his arms and fuck that sweet pussy of hers. She wouldn’t have said no. She would have spread her legs and welcomed her master.
She would have been terribly insulted. She was a lady, a bondmate. She deserved respect. His wants and needs were perverse. She would help him overcome them. Once he and Cian had properly bonded, the overwhelming need he felt to dominate his lovers during sex would go away. It had to.
“I don’t understand you, cos,” Dante admitted. The light was fading now. The vampire didn’t need the hood of his shirt. He sat negligently in the shade, but then, everything Dante Dellacourt did had an air of negligence about it.
“I don’t expect you to.” Beck soaped his long hair. It should have been Meg’s job. Washing her husband’s hair was the responsibility of a Fae woman. He had given up the right when he treated her like a piece of trash.
“You’re tearing yourself apart over what happened out there, and I’m not sure which part is killing you. You aren’t responsible for the fact that you’re losing control. You should have been bonded five years ago. If I recall, your parents had already betrothed the two of you to a nice royal girl.”
Beck snorted. He remembered Maris. How could he forget? He’d known since he was very young that she was his future bondmate. She had been a cool blonde and very aware of her position, even as a young teen. If she had been with him in the arena, she would have slapped him silly. “I don’t think my uncle intended to honor that contract.”
The vampire sighed impatiently. “That’s my point, asshole. You did everything right. It’s not your fault that it all went wrong. Meg saved you.”
“Don’t you think I know that?” Beck asked irritably.
“Then why did you treat her like crap?”
“It’s your fault,” Beck snarled, lying through his teeth. Maybe if he pissed his cousin off enough, he would go away and leave him alone. “You were the one who was stupid enough to bring her into the arena.”
Dante stood. He walked to the water’s edge, proving he did, indeed, have a death wish. “It was the only way I could think to salvage the situation.”
“I can think of another,” Beck replied, narrowing his eyes in challenge.
Dante threw his head back and groaned. “I am not going to inject you with cold iron, you asshole. Get over it. If you want to commit suicide, I’ll give you the needle, but I won’t push the plunger. I wouldn’t just be killing you. I would be killing Cian, too, and I happen to like him. I like him a hell of a lot more than I like you right now. You had no right to treat her like that.”
“I know.” Beck didn’t even try to keep the guilt out of his voice.
“She gave you everything she had, and you tell her to cover up,” Dante complained. “No, ‘wow, baby, that was one hell of a blow job. You’ve got the sweetest mouth known to man.’ Just ‘cover up so no one sees my bitch.’”
Beck’s anger was on the rise once more. “Hey, don’t you talk about her like that. She’s my wife.”
“Then why is she crying alone? I checked in on her, and she was crying.”
Beck felt his stomach clench. She was crying, and he was the bastard who had caused it. “I won’t ever take her like that again. I can’t take it back. I can only promise to treat her with respect from this point on.”
Dante rolled his eyes. “You are such an idiot. You honestly think that she’s upset because you fucked her? She is heartbroken because you fucked her, bonded with her, and then dumped her ass. Seriously, you need to take lessons in how to woo a woman because they don’t like it when you use them and walk away. Even I know that.”
Beck marched out of the river, shaking the water off his skin. Dante had brought along a towel, and he tossed it toward Beck. Beck did not thank him. “I didn’t dump her. I lost my fucking head. I treated her like a piece of meat. Can you blame her for not wanting to be near me?”
“Oh, cos, that wasn’t the problem,” the vampire said, bringing the attitude down a notch. “I was watching. Hell, I couldn’t take my eyes off it.” Dante left that line of thought at Beck’s low growl. “I think she’s more perfect for you than you could have hoped. She enjoyed it.”
Beck twisted his long, dark hair. It would be a bitch to comb out. “That was the bond. I flooded her with it. I pushed myself at her.”
“That is your nature,” Dante said quietly. “But I think you are underestimating her nature. She was happy afterward. She wasn’t ashamed. You made her feel that.”
Beck pointed an accusatory finger at his cousin. “You don’t understand. Maybe you vampires treat consorts with such blatant disrespect, but we do not dishonor our bondmates in such a fashion.”
When Dante spoke next, he had to talk around his fangs. It let Beck know just how irritated his cousin was. “We vampires make damn sure that our lovers are satisfied, and after they’re satisfied, we thank them and cuddle them. We find out what they need and give it to them. If what my lover needs runs counter to what society or my father taught me was acceptable, then fuck society.”
“Don’t you talk about my father,” Beck warned.
“Of course, it all comes back to your father. He was a good man, Beckett, but he wasn’t perfect. He wasn’t a perfect king, and he damn sure wasn’t a perfect father. He pushed you too hard, and he completely ignored Cian. Cian was supposed to be king, too. He didn’t value Cian’s input, so he focused all his time on you. No one could live up to his standards. Gods, Beck, when are you going to be who you are and not who he thought you should be?”
“Get out.” Beck would not listen to anyone talk about his father that way. He hadn’t been able to save his father, but he could damn sure preserve his memory. “Get the fuck out of here. Go back to your cushy little plane and make all the scandalous news you possibly can. Don’t come back here. You won’t be welcome.”
Dante dropped his hands in defeat. “Fine. I’ll go, but I’m only going as far your village. I’ll head out and make sure Cian doesn’t fade before you can get to him, but you would do well to listen to me. You’ll make yourself and that woman you married miserable if you deny who you are.”
Dante stalked off, his lanky body disappearing in the tall, thin trees that quaked in the wind.
Beck wrapped the towel around his waist and sank to the ground. It was a long time before he rose, and the whole time he sat wondering if the vampire wasn’t right.
* * * *
Meg tried very hard not to feel anything. Cara’s small hands smoothed the soft fabric over her shoulders. The little gnome had to stand on a chair to reach her. Meg knew she should be helping, but she felt so empty that she allowed the gnome to dress her as she would a doll. She had merely answered the female’s softly spoken commands. Lift your right leg. Lift your left leg. Bow your head so I can get the shirt on. Cara sang quietly while she worked. Everything the little gnome did was soothing.
In the mirror, she could see that she was wearing what looked like suede pants, though god only knew what kind of animal had actually given up its skin for them. Her shirt was a little tight in the chest, so she immediately buttoned the collar up to her throat. It wasn’t flattering. It looked much better unbuttoned. Unbuttoned, it showed off a creamy expanse of skin and a faint hint of round breast. Meg thought it looked rather sexy. But Beck hadn’t found the sight of her naked body sexy at all. Cara had wrapped a leather belt around her waist then helped her into a pair of knee-length boots. Her hair was braided and marigolds were woven into it.
All Meg could think about was how she was going to get away.
“Well, look at you,” a low voice said. “Fae Barbie.”
Meg shook her head. As upset as she was, the vampire made her smile. He might be the only thing she halfway understood in this strange world. “You have Barbies, too?”
“Oh, yes,” Dante confirmed. “My sister filled the house with them. I used to have my soldiers take them hostage. She had to pay me to get them back. It was my first business. The consort Barbies come with bite marks on their necks. I bet yours don’t have that.”
“No,” Meg said and sort of wished Dante had been the one she was tied to. She was bouncing all over the place emotionally, but she couldn’t help it. At least he had a sense of humor, and apparently, his plane had things she was used to, like running water and indoor toilets.
“Hey.” Dante brushed a tear off her cheek. “None of that. It’s going to be all right. You’ll see.”
“I’m sure it will be fine.” It would be perfectly fine once she got the hell out of here. Someone would be willing to help her. She didn’t buy that no-going-back crap. If she got here, she could get back.
Dante’s perceptive eyes narrowed. “Don’t run. It won’t go well for you. There are things in that forest you can’t imagine. Promise me you won’t run until you meet Cian. Please, just give him a chance to be less of an asshole than Beck has been this afternoon.”
“If he’s anything like his brother, there’s no point,” Meg said bitterly.
“But he isn’t, sweetheart. That is the point. Cian is the intellectual half. He is also the more romantic half,” Dante mused. “It’s odd how they split. Beck is all the hard and pragmatic bits. He’s all about responsibility and honor, while Cian is playful and instinctive. Sometimes I think Beck got the short end of the stick. Of course, Beck is not the one who lies down from time to time and decides to fade because the world is too much for him. It’s all very dramatic, trust me.”
Meg huffed and began to pace. “You are seriously telling me that this Cian person isn’t really Beck’s brother, but the other half of him.”
Dante looked thrilled. “Her little human brain works! Yes, that is what I’m telling you. Two bodies, one soul.” Dante gently touched a finger to her forehead. “You bridge the two right here. They balance through you. You complete them.”
“And if I don’t want to complete them?”
The vampire smiled sympathetically. “Just meet Cian. You can’t begin to understand Beckett until you meet all of him. And he wasn’t disappointed in you, sweetheart. He was upset with himself.”
“Sure he was.” She’d heard that one before. It’s not you, Meg. It’s me.
“He was,” Dante said seriously. “He has odd ideas about how a bondmate should be treated. On his plane, a bondmate, especially one of royal blood, expects to be treated like a princess. I think they all have sticks up their asses, if you ask me. It took my mom years to relax and learn to take my father in stride. Right now, Beck sees you as a perfect little possession, and he wants to take good care of you. Watch him. You’ll see. He won’t let you do anything. He’ll wait on you hand and foot.”
Meg sighed. She had worked since the day she turned fifteen. No one had ever accused her of slacking off. Of course, she hadn’t had much of a choice. “I’m not asking him to do that. I’m not a princess.”
“I know that. You know that. Teach him that. You’ll all be happier if you’re a fully functioning member of the team rather than a porcelain doll they take down and very gently make love to, but only after asking politely.” Dante shuddered as though the very thought made him ill. “You are the best thing that could have happened to him. Work on Cian first. He’s the openly passionate one. He’s the one who never wanted that polite bargain where he loved you from afar because he was worried his passion would be too much for you.”
“Beck doesn’t love me,” Meg said. “He just met me.”
“He won’t be able to help himself, and neither will you.” The vampire picked up a small satchel Meg had seen Cara fill. He settled it over her shoulder, giving her a sharp slap on the back. It moved her forward a little. “Be careful out there, and remember what I told you.”
“And just what did you tell my mate, vampire?” Beck’s eyes were a glacial gray as he stood in the doorway.
Meg froze, but Dante merely rolled his eyes. “It’s always Dante, or my cos, when he wants something. And when he’s pissed off he calls me vampire. He says it like it’s a bad thing. I’ll have you know that vampires are the most advanced of all the races. Come to my plane sometime, sweetheart, and I’ll show you. We’re launching a mission to test a deep space shuttle. Vamps in space. It’s going to be awesome.” Dante jauntily slapped his cousin on the back. “See you back at the village. I’ll give Cian your greeting, but I’ll keep my mouth shut about her. It’s better if she’s a surprise.”
The vampire left, and Meg was alone with Beck. He’d had a shower, or whatever they took here, and now he was clean and so gorgeous it hurt to look at him. His linen shirt was open at the throat. It showed off his rock hard chest to spectacular advantage. How had she even thought for a second he could want her? She wasn’t even in his league.
“Are you ready?” The question was quiet, but as with everything the man said, there was an order in there. He stood looking at her, and Meg heated up, even after everything he’d done.
Meg knew that if he had shown her an ounce of kindness in the arena, she would have been an eager puppy following him without question. She would have written off her previous existence and done everything he asked of her. She was truly pathetic. He had done her a favor. “Does it matter if I am or not?”
“No,” Beck admitted. “We need to leave now if we’re going to make it to the lake before midnight. I want to spend the night there.” He held the flap to the tent open and gestured her out.
Meg stepped out and quickly took a step back. “What the hell is that?”
It was monstrous. It looked like a horse, but someone had put it on steroids and dyed it a dark blue. It was so dark that one could mistake it for black, but when the late afternoon sun hit the thing’s coat, there was an unmistakable midnight blue shining there.
Beck ran a strong hand along the beast’s back. It was obvious he had a fondness for the enormous animal. Even Beck, as big as he was, would have to haul himself into the saddle. “This is Sweeney. He’s a good boy, aren’t you? He won’t hurt you, love.”
Meg forced herself not to soften. He sounded like he had before the events of the arena. She remembered how gentle he had been with her when he’d rubbed her to orgasm. She’d liked that almost as much as what happened later.
Meg shook her head. “I’ll walk, thank you.”
She turned on her heels and started down the road. There was no way she was getting on the back of that thing. She might have been born in Texas, but she’d never really left the city. She’d never been on a horse, much less an elephant, and that’s what that thing reminded her of. Meg ignored the odd looks she received as she walked down the lane.
In the distance, she could see the forest ahead. The trees were unbearably thick. Only the road seemed to be clear, as though the forest around it was a living thing, waiting to pounce on anyone who walked into it. Meg swallowed once, and then twice, thinking that it didn’t seem like a good idea to go into that forest. She was just about to turn back into town to protest when she felt a strong hand lifting her into the air by the back of her shirt.
“Hey!” Meg screamed in shock as she found herself across Beck’s lap. Without thinking about it, she threw her arms around his chest and clung to him, afraid to fall off the beast. It was an awfully long way down, and there wasn’t a handy ER around to set whatever would break.
Sweeney huffed and pranced, getting used to the new weight on his back. After a few seconds, Beck made a clicking sound. The horse took off.
“Hold on tight, love,” was all he said as he kicked the horse into high gear.
Meg did as he asked, holding on with all her might. The forest loomed large, getting closer every second. Like it or not, she was going into the woods.