I stalked to the cabin, furious for more reasons than I could identify. The first reason, of course, was Randy, who only thought about himself. The second thing was watching Matthew fly off the granite shelf. My heart hammered hard in my chest as I watched the man disappear over the edge. Even though the drop was only about ten feet, there were sharp rocks that could cause real damage.

When I saw Matthew lying motionless, my heart nearly stopped. I didn’t start breathing again until Matthew waved his arm at me. Dear Lord, did I have to goad Matthew like that? I should have realized that he might react impulsively. We’d talked about his impulse control issues. I was aware of it, and still, I couldn’t resist putting in a dig.

“What I see is a city boy who can’t take a hike.”

What was wrong with me? Why did I say that? Matthew doesn’t know the trails like I d,o. But deep down inside I knew why. He was the convenient recipient of my anger toward Randy.

I felt like shit. Not just about Randy, but how I had treated Matthew. And I probably should have taken Matthew to the emergency department, even if he didn’t want to go. I’d have to watch him carefully to make sure he didn’t get a skin infection.

And how did I know that he didn’t hit his head? Jesus. I was such an idiot. The last thing a person with a brain injury needed was more hits to the head. Some doctor hopeful I was.

I barreled into the cabin, dropped the basket on the wood slat floor and turned on the lights. I walked around the living room, pulling off yellowed sheets from the rustic, woven, willow furniture, made serviceable from cushions on the seats and backs my grandmother had made. They could use an airing out, and I opened the window to let the spring breeze fill the room. I pushed a broom around to catch what dust I could, but there was more cleaning this place needed.

Finally, I made up the bed with the linens and quilt my grandmother left for Matthew. When it was done, I sat down for a few minutes and spent time on the bed as the afternoon shadows lengthened on the floor, thinking about the times Randy and I had spent here.

There were summers where we went down to that stream that Matthew tumbled to today, and splashed each other silly, then drank beer until we were stupid. The two of us would come back to the cabin and hang out. The few times we fucked, it was here. Or rather, Randy did the fucking. He preferred to take control, and he sure never liked going down on me.

But Matthew? That man was sex on a stick, handsome and sexy as well as was able, willing and eager to give me whatever I wanted. The signs were all there, I just had to accept his offer.

I considered how fucked up I was that it I found it difficult to turn to Matthew, who seemed as if he would give me anything when Randy would give me nothing.

I shook my head and stood. I needed to get back to the kennel and get the animals staying overnight fed.

When I returned, I found the day residents were gone, and just the ten dogs staying overnight happily munching their dinner. Parker was eating too, and Matthew was sweeping the floor one more time.

“Hey,” I said.

“Hi.”

“Ready to call it a night? Eat some dinner?”

“Sounds good.”

I glanced around and checked over Matthew’s work. I was impressed. I thought I kept the kennel clean, but it was shinier than normal with the fresh scent of disinfectant hanging in the air.

“You did a good job.”

“Thanks.”

“Any comments from any day clients?”

Matthew shrugged. “There are a couple checks on the desk for you.”

I nodded. “Good.”

“I checked on your grandmother. She was baking some pies.”

“She was?” I frowned.

“And she said that since you had a big box of barbecue in the refrigerator that we might as well have it for dinner.”

“Oh yeah.” I had shoved my aborted lunch in the fridge when I returned. “Not enough for three though.”

“She’s not home. A friend of hers, Emma Johnson, picked her up to take her to dinner.”

“I hope she’s okay.” I worried that my grandmother pushed herself too much. She always was a hard worker, and the past couple months she was unhappy with her lack of activity.

“She looked like she was doing fine,” Matthew said. “And she’s with a friend. I’m sure she’ll be okay.”

“Yeah. Not like I can stop her anyway.”

Matthew walked silently behind me, and in my mind’s eyes, I saw him moving silently and stealthily through a foreign land, fighting enemies, and surviving terrible trials. There was something appealing in that picture, and I couldn’t deny that I was sexually drawn to the ex-soldier following me. I looked over my shoulder and found Matthew’s eyes on my ass. But he snapped his head up and gave me a grim smile without comment.

In the kitchen, I found a couple cherry pies on the counter. “I guess we have dessert.”

“I can see I’m not in danger of starving here,” Matthew said wryly.

It was an attempt to make conversation, but I didn’t feel like talking.

“Can you get the ice tea from the fridge?”

“Sure,” he said. I kept my back to Matthew as the man did as I asked. I didn’t know what to say to him. My emotions warred within. The pull toward Matthew was so strong. But that, I decided, must just be lust.

“Sit,” I said as I went through the motions of getting the barbecue food into the microwave. I portioned out the coleslaw and stuck the cornbread on a plate to warm it when the meat was done. As I moved around the kitchen, I became aware of Matthew’s eyes on me again. Finally, with the food warmed, I brought two plates to the table.

“Here you go,” I said.

“Looks good.”

We settled at the table to eat, but I just stirred the barbecue with my fork.

Matthew sat back and put his fork down.

“Okay. What’s bothering you?”

“Nothing.”

Matthew huffed. “I call bullshit on that. And I’m sure as hell not going to sit here eating in silence. So, spill or I’ll take my food out on the porch.”

“Well, look at you. That’s a threat.”

“Meleyna. I’ve had a rough day, and I’m not into bullshit. I’m sorry if I pushed myself on you this morning.”

Parker’s ears picked up at the change of tone in Matthew’s voice. He padded to Matthew and pressed his head against his knee.

“You think I’m — No. Just no. It has nothing to do with you.”

“I don’t know if that makes me feel better.”

“I’m the one that should be offering apologies. I goaded you on the trail, pushed you too hard. I’m sorry.”

“Hell, Meleyna. That little dust-up was nothing.”

“I don’t understand. You—” I stopped. How did I talk about what happened last night?

“What? I freaked out at a truck backfire but fell down a ten-foot embankment, and it doesn’t bother me? Shoot. I don’t know if I’ll have a nightmare over that tonight. I never know what ghosts will visit me in the dark. But that’s why I have Parker here.” Matthew rubbed behind Parker’s ears absently.

“And you shouldn’t apologize to me. Not for this morning. Because if you felt sorry for that, that would make me feel shitty.”

“Oh, damn,” I said softly. “I just can’t win for losing here.”

“But you should know I was trained as a tracker. And I have a good nose for sniffing out the fugazi on the road.”

“Fugazi?”

“Fucked up shit. So, what is really going on here, Meleyna? Because, as much as I promised to help, I can go home too.”

“Oh shit,” I said. I was making a mess of things. “Look. It doesn’t have anything to do with you.”

“No?”

“Well, mostly not. I met Randy for lunch today.”

“I see,” Matthew said slowly. “Well, if you still have feelings for the guy—” Matthew stood, and I caught his arm, panicking. I was doing this all wrong. I’d upset him, and now he wanted to leave. I realized suddenly that I didn’t want to see him walk out the door.

“Stay, Matthew. Please.”

“Nah. I think I can use some shut-eye. Good night, Meleyna.”

Parker gave me a soulful look but followed after Matthew. I sighed, then got up and cleaned off the dishes. I’d really fucked things up good. And all because I couldn’t get Randy Barker out of my head.

I tossed the dishes in the sink too forcefully, and one of them shattered against the ceramic walls.

“Damnit!” I swore. I picked out the pieces of broken plate and threw it in the trash. I’d nicked my finger on a piece though and sucked on it as I contemplated the situation. This whole day ended as a clusterfuck.

I swung open the creaky door of the ancient medicine cabinet in the bathroom to retrieve a band-aid. The fixture was a box set inside the wall and plain stainless steel wrapped around the mirror. You wouldn’t find another like it today in a hardware store. It sat on the wall, holding the various accouterments of Harris daily living, medicine, band-aids, toothpaste and the like for at least the past fifty years. And so, it was likely to stay until someone else bought this house and decided to upgrade to a more modern model.

“Fuck,” I swore. All my life was like this cabinet, stuck in one place and doing the same thing again and again. Was this what my life was destined to become, sitting inexorably in place, become creaky and passé doing the same thing until someone else decided on a change?

Hell no.

I grabbed bandages and peroxide from the cabinet, determined to see Matthew under the aegis of checking his wounds from the day. I swept through the kitchen and picked up one of the pies as well, and a couple of bottles of water from the fridge. Except for the pie, I dumped the items in my hands into a cloth shopping bag and clamored down the wood stairs.

I picked up the pace as I headed up the trail. The surrounding trees closed in around me in the evening gloom of the setting sun. I should have brought a flashlight, but in my hurry, I’d forgotten about it. But an excitement fluttered in my stomach, and that was from the thought of seeing Matthew again. I’d only been out of the Marine’s presence for ten minutes, and I couldn’t wait to see him again.

As I wondered at that thought, I approached the cabin. The warm glow of light filled the windows, and it felt like the little house was welcoming me. It was an old friend, this house, filled with childhood and teenage memories. And though I thought of the dwelling as mine, it was Matthew inside that made it feel like home. That realization spurred me on.

I knocked on the door.

It took a couple minutes, and I panicked. What if Matthew didn’t want to see me?

The door creaked open, and Matthew peered at me.

“Hi,” I said softly.

Matthew’s eyes fell to the pie in my hands.

“What is this? Pie delivery? I didn’t realize that I could get service like this in the woods.”

I held up the bag hanging from my arm.

“I thought I’d check your wounds—you know, to make sure they weren’t getting infected.”

“I see,” Matthew said with narrowed eyes. “And the pie works into this plan how?”

“Just being neighborly.”

“I see.”

“Are you going to invite me in, or not?” I said peevishly.

Matthew snorted, then guffawed as he stepped away.

“What is so funny?” I said indignantly. My initial ardor was receding, and I was starting to feel embarrassed.

“The look on your face. I can’t describe it, except—it’s like if I didn’t let you in it would be as bad as if I took your favorite puppy away from you.”

My heart warmed under the teasing. I smiled and shook my head. “I look that desperate, do I?”

“No,” he said with a sly smile. “You look adorable.”

“Adorable?” I said as my heart melted a bit. “That’s a helluva thing to say to a woman who’s come to your doorstep offering herself.”

“Is that what you’re doing? Offering yourself? What else do you want me to call you? Gorgeous? Delicious? Sexy as hell? Are you ready for that?”

“I must say, Sergeant, you do have a firm grasp of the English language.”

Matthew took the pie and bag from me and set them on the counter and then faced me.

“There is something else I want a firm grasp of,” he said.

I swallowed hard. “What is that?” I asked, my heart starting to pound.

Matthew stepped in closer. “You.”