10
Lauren
Later that night, I found myself lying in bed with the blankets covering my head. I had rushed home, well not my home but to Cole and Melanie’s home, and turned off my cell phone. We each had keys to the other’s homes in case of emergencies. This was an emergency.
I didn’t want to talk to anyone or see anyone. The last time I had felt this scared and alone was two years ago when I received the call that Melanie was in the hospital after her wreck. Back then, I felt like I was losing my best friend. I couldn’t believe that something so tragic could happen to a person like me, but it did. Now, I have that same sinking feeling again. As though this could all be the end of something special. In a way, I did just lose my best friend. My other best friend who also held my heart.
I can’t believe this could be the end of Isaac and me. I can feel him slipping away from me. I should have seen the signs. He had been texting the night we all went to Wild Thing’s together. He wasn’t returning my texts or calls like he used to. If this is real- if I am losing Isaac, I don’t know if I am strong enough to know the answer. It can’t be real, can it be?
Looking around the guestroom I would be calling home for a while, I noticed that it screamed love and happy times. The white bed spread was full of soft pastel colored pillows. The walls were a soft beige color and had pictures of Melanie and Isaac on various trips and some of all of our friends.
All I could think about was the happy times Isaac and I had shared as our love blossomed and grew into a force not to be reckoned with. My mind quickly flashed to the night Isaac had proposed to me. That was undoubtedly the best night of my entire life. I could still see everything so vividly as though the moment was happening again right before my eyes.
It must have been hours since I had run away from Isaac. Without wanting to go home, I had made my way to Melanie’s house. I knew eventually she and Cole would come home and find me, but I didn’t care. I needed her.
***
ISAAC HAD THROWN A glamorous party in which I had dressed up like a movie star. He knew me so well to plan such a beautiful and elaborate party. When I walked with Isaac and stood in the center of the living room amongst all of our friends, I knew something was up. I instantly made eye contact with Mel and I tried to hide my excitement, I didn’t want to give away that I was growing aware of the surprise Isaac had in store for me. Well, not yet. I could tell from the moment we entered the party that he was going to propose. Sure, Isaac had thrown tons of parties at his house but none compared to this one. As Melanie’s eyes rose as she looked at me, I knew without a doubt this was my moment. Isaac turned to me and, he knelt down on one knee and pulled the ring out of his suit pocket. Everyone around the room began to gasp and some were already clapping. My breath faltered as I felt tears swell in my eyes.
My eyes danced as I focused on the shiny diamond in Isaac’s hand. “Lauren, I love you more than anything and I know this may seem rushed, but I can’t wait any longer. I have to ask. Will you marry me?” His voice shook as he spoke, but the love and sentiment rang higher and caused goose bumps to appear on my arms. His were the sweetest words I had ever heard in my life. There was nothing that would stop me from marrying this man who was my prince charming.
Overwhelmed with love, I threw myself into his arms. Isaac sighed and smiled at me as he quickly stood and placed the ring on my finger before he dipped me and kissed me in what can only be described as the most romantic, long and dramatic kiss. Everyone in the room erupted with applause and cheers but to me; there was no one in that room except for me and Isaac.
***
I SWIPED AT A TEAR that began to race down my cheek. I hated how that moment which was so beautiful was now something that caused me pain to think about.
Just as quickly as that memory invaded my head, another one crept up on me and had me sobbing as I was reminded of the first time I met Isaac. He was everything I didn’t need or want. But, there was something so alluring and magnetic about him that I couldn’t help but throw myself at him. As silly as it sounds, the first time I saw Isaac was the first time I had ever felt giddy or silly around a guy.
***
MEL HAD FINALLY AGREED to go out of our apartment with me after his disastrous break-up with the asshat Brody. I had this wild idea that I was going to get a tattoo on my lower stomach. It had been something I had wanted for a while but had never mustered the courage to do it. We decided to drive around town until I found a place that looked clean and not too wild for Mel. Finally, I found a cute little shop and as we walked in, I knew this was the place for me. Loud rock music blared through speakers and the décor had a sort of modern rock style vibe to it. A big guy named Smalls took me back to a small room where he was starting to get the ink ready for my Lilly tattoo. He was hitting on me the whole time, but I didn’t mind. Mel looked freaked though and just as the ink hit my skin, down she went. It was embarrassing as hell watching her pass out right there in the middle of the room. Thankfully, Isaac emerged as Smalls began to yell for help. At first, I didn’t really notice him because I was so concerned with Mel. I mean, I had begged her to come out with me and then I break her!
Anyway, As Isaac placed her on a couch in the waiting room, my head finally turned to see a tall man with wavy blonde hair leaning against the door frame. His body was built, thick from obvious hardcore gym time. His blue eyes were locked on me as I was crouched down by Melanie’s side. He smiled and waved as he saw me notice him. I swear, I felt butterfly’s dance in my stomach as our eyes connected.
Suddenly, I stood and began fixing my hair. I knew right then and there that I wanted this guy.
***
THOSE MEMORIES ARE slowly dying as I lay there alone. Pulling my shorts down a little past my hips, I examined the Lilly tattoo that I finally did have tattooed. It was yellow with gold trim. It was perfect and exactly what I wanted to represent my favorite flower and grandmother’s name. Again, this memory which held so much sentiment and represented so much about my life with Isaac, now brought me pain.
I heard the front door open sometime after dark and Melanie slowly walked into the guest room where I was hiding.
“Lauren?” she called as I pulled the covers away from my head.
“Mel,” I whimpered.
I took one look at Mel and lost all control. Guilt washed over me as I realized I knew what was happening to Cole’s shop and hadn’t told Melanie and Cole first. I was a terrible best friend. My heart was aching from Isaac’s lies, but more than anything, it was breaking for her. Cole had confided in me and Isaac after we got engaged that he was going to propose to Melanie. He didn’t want to steal our thunder or our moment so he was going to wait until after the wedding. That was part of the reason why we had set a date so soon. I wanted nothing more than for Melanie to have a dream wedding that she deserved. Now that everything was falling apart with me and Isaac, I wasn’t sure when either wedding would happen.
Rushing to my side, Melanie jumped in the bed with me and began to hold me tight. She held me as I cried and soothed me as I tried to talk. It was clear she knew what had happened and I didn’t need to explain any further.
“I’m sorry I came here,” I said after I calmed down a bit.
“Don’t be sorry,” Melanie said as she ran her hand along my back. “Lauren, you were there for me when I lost everyone. You took care of me for years and now, it is my turn to take care of you,” she said with a smile.
“Cole must hate me,” I cried out. “Isaac put his shop in danger too,” I said as my stomach rolled with the thought.
“I don’t hate you,” Cole’s voice said from the hallway.
I peeked out from underneath Melanie’s embrace to see a distraught looking Cole standing in the doorway of the room.
“How can you not hate me? Isaac did something awful,” I stated.
“Yes, Isaac did something awful, not you. I will figure out how to deal with Isaac, but Lauren, you are welcome here anytime,” Cole smiled as he looked sad.
I realized in that moment that Cole and I were alike. Both of us had been betrayed by someone we loved and trusted. We were both victims of Isaac’s careless antics and we would both have to find a way to deal with the repercussions of his actions.
“Thank you,” I said as I held onto Melanie tightly.
“Lauren, you are going to stay here with us until you figure everything out,” Melanie insisted.
“I don’t know,” I said through tears. “No one believes in love more than I do, but I don’t know if Isaac and I are strong enough to get through this,” I admitted.
Holding me close, Melanie began to slowly rock me back and forth. A movement much like my mother used to do when I was a child and had bad dreams. The same movement I used to do when I would hold Melanie when she would wake during the night years ago after her wreck. I would hold her and rock her and soothe her; much like she is doing right now to calm me.
“Whatever you decide to do, I am here for you no matter what,” Melanie said as she continued to hold me. “You will get through this.”
Too tired to argue or say anything else, I just shook my head yes. I fell asleep in her arms that night and slept soundly all the way through the darkness.