1.
After all of this time, it was finally happening. Emma watched Dale pack his bags. He was tipping the drawers out onto the bed and sweeping his clothes inside them in big crumpled balls, refusing to look at her as he went. She had never wanted this to happen, but after two years of trying to make their relationship work, she knew now that she had to cut her losses and get out before it was too late.
“Dale,” she whispered. “Please, at least talk to me.”
“I’ve got nothing to say,” he hissed as he zipped up one bag and started on the other. “I get it, you don’t want to be with me and that’s fine. What else is there to say…?”
Emma sat down on the edge of the bed and looked at him. He was right, but she still deserved some closure. They had been in each other’s lives for such a long time and even though it would be futile, it seemed wrong to simply end everything without a proper discussion.
It hadn’t always been so bad between them. When they first met, Dale had been everything she thought she wanted in a man. He was handsome, together, well brought up, and he had ambition and was going places. But as the weeks, months and years passed, Emma grew to realize that just because someone is conventionally good on paper, it didn’t mean that those particular set of characteristics were right for her. Dale was dependable and safe, he was a sure thing…and even though his predictability had become tedious and boring, that hadn’t driven her away. For all of his good points, he had one major flaw and that was he was unprepared to give her the one thing she wanted most.
Even though it had terrified her to admit it, she finally did one night as she watched him sleeping and knew that she felt nothing…
She needed more.
She needed something exciting.
Dale zipped up the second bag and turned to look at her.
“Let’s not leave things like this,” she began. “I never meant to hurt you.”
Dale held up his hand to stop her from speaking.
“Let’s not do this,” he said. “I don’t want to hear any more of what you have to say.”
“But…”
“No,” he said as he slung both of the bags over his shoulder. “I knew this was going to happen one day. I was just kidding myself.”
“You never really wanted me either, admit it,” she said, standing up to face him and placing her hands on her hips.
She remembered back to their conversations, all of the nights they had talked about their dreams and aspirations. He knew how much Emma wanted children, but he always laughed it off like she was a fool for having that basic human desire. It was like Dale had never even entertained the idea, and the more she brought it up, the more he seemed to resist. After a year, she had almost given up talking about a baby altogether and that was when the love she had for him began to die. She knew what she wanted and he was never going to give it to her.
“I just don’t want to be forced into something,” he said finally. “But maybe we never have been on the same page.”
The relief Emma felt when he admitted it was overwhelming. She sat back on the bed, flopped backwards and closed her eyes, exhaling and letting go of all of the negative energy. It was sad to part with a person who had been her whole world for over two years, but she had put her life on hold and it eventually ground to a halt. She couldn’t wait forever for something that was never going to happen.
“So I guess this is it?” Dale said from the doorway.
They had shared that room for over a year and slept side by side every night. They had cuddled together underneath the covers and watched old movies, they’d eaten tubs of ice cream and Dale had helped her pick outfits for nights out with her girlfriends. But it was also the place where he had on a countless number of occasions made her cry, made her feel like she wasn’t good enough for him and repeatedly refused to discuss their future. Emma knew that when it really came down to it, there was no deep emotion running under it all. They weren’t unbreakable, and she knew that she could live without him.
“Goodbye, Dale,” Emma said without even looking up.
He sighed and she heard his footsteps heading down the hallway before the slam of the front door. She was alone in the house for the first time in months, but she didn’t mind. She was about to completely restart her life, and this time, she was up for anything.