CHAPTER 15
Ainsleigh
G entry kept to his word and made sure I was well fed. He even went to the lengths of feeding me the last few bites on my plate since he claimed I didn’t eat enough. I loved how caring he was and how he showed me in every way that he was there for me through thick and thin. Regret filled my chest at the four years I’d missed out on with him over my own guilty conscience. Quickly, I pushed the guilt down in a place I could revisit later. I had to hurry if I wanted to see my friends off to the airport in time. I hated that they had to leave. I hated even more that I wasn’t the greatest house guest while they were here since I had to help my dad and I spent the evenings with Gentry. They didn’t seem to mind in the slightest once Aspen overheard Dylan’s feelings for her. She was stubborn, but I had a feeling she’d put him out of his misery soon enough and tell him how she felt the same way. She just wanted to make him sweat it out a little since he took so long to admit it to everyone, including himself.
Using the napkin, I wiped my face off and picked up the plate before me, carrying it over to the sink where Gentry stood cleaning up our mess from this morning.
“I need you to take me to my parents’ house. I need to say goodbye to Dylan and Aspen and take them to the airport,” I told him as I put my hip against the counter for support and watched him finish his task at hand. There was something sexy to me about a man doing the dishes. I couldn’t put my hand on what made it that way, but it did. Maybe it was just the fact that it was Gentry doing it. Who knows?
He looked over at me with a grin on his face without saying a word and continued to wash the plate in his hand.
A knock at the door startled me since no one knew we were here but Gentry and me.
“What did you do?”
“Do they know about our daughter?” he asked with a sincere expression on his face.
I couldn’t tell anyone while I was away. I suffered in silence and when I was alone. Other than that, I appeared to be happy to anyone looking my way.
Shaking my head, I looked to the floor feeling the shame of my response. I shouldn’t have buried her away. I should’ve talked about her. Remembered her the way she deserved to be remembered. Only I didn’t. I carried that burden alone while I was miles away.
“It’s time to tell them, Ainsleigh. Let them all the way in. They may just surprise you,” he replied as he leaned over and kissed my forehead.
Another knock sounded throughout the space, and I broke the trance I was in and walked to the door.
Pulling on the handle, I opened the door to Dylan and Aspen standing on the other side.
I gave them a nervous smile as I moved to the side and motioned for them to come inside.
The living room was just off to the left of the entryway, and I held out my hand for them to go into that room. I let out a breath, scared of how they’d react to what I was about to tell them.
They sat on the couch beside one another and I sat on the loveseat to the right of them.
“What’s wrong, Ainsleigh? Gentry texted Dylan and gave him the directions to this house and asked us to meet y’all here. Where are we?”
That was Aspen. Getting straight to the point was her forte. Only when it came to other people. When it came to anything about her, she hesitated in letting people help her.
“This is my house. My grandparents left it to me when they passed away. Just before I was to graduate high school, my brothers, parents, and Gentry all helped me get this place ready to move in. Today is a day that changed my life forever four years ago. I know you both heard what his mother said to me, and I’m thankful you didn’t press for information. I wasn’t ready to talk about it then. I’m not sure I’m ready to talk about it now, but given the circumstances, and Gentry’s subtle way of telling me it was time, I’m going to tell you guys something I’ve kept from both of you since you met me.”
Aspen and Dylan exchanged worried glances before they looked at me. Gentry took that moment to come into the room, drying his hands on a dish towel as he sat down beside me. He draped his arm across the back of the loveseat, and my body instantly moved to lean on him for the comfort I’d need to make this confession.
“Four years ago today I lost a part of me that I’ll never get back. We lost a part of each other that we never got a chance to cherish.”
I started to get choked up on the words that I was about to reveal.
Aspen’s movements caught my attention, and I looked up as she was about to cross the room to come over to me, but Dylan’s hand on her thigh stopped her, and she sat back down next to him. They linked their fingers together, and I couldn’t be happier that they were finally taking this chance on each other.
I stood up and walked over to the built-in bookcase and picked up one of my favorite pictures taken of our little angel. Looking at this picture, one would assume Arabella was just sleeping, but I knew otherwise. She’d never wake up in frustration of being moved into poses while we snapped pictures. A lone tear escaped as I took her in. She had a pink bow wrapped around her head and a white and pink blanket wrapped around her tiny body with her name etched into the fabric. She lay there on top of the saddle with her tiny hand underneath her head. I dreamed of taking these pictures of her after she was born. Never in a million years did I think I’d be taking them as the only memory I’d ever have of her.
I walked over to where my friends sat and handed them the delicate frame.
They both looked down at the picture within the metal, and Aspen raised her hand to her mouth as she looked up at me with unshed tears in her eyes. She knew what I was about to reveal before I spoke the words.
“That’s our daughter, Arabella Faith Parkhurst. I was four weeks away from my due date when something went horribly wrong. By the time I was able to have the cesarean section, it was too late. Our little girl was born forever sleeping,” I confessed to the two people I now looked at as my family.
Aspen and Dylan both took in the weight of my words. This time when Aspen went to stand, Dylan didn’t stop her. She rushed over to me, her knees hitting the floor in front of me as she wrapped her arms around my waist and laid her head in my lap.
“I’m so sorry, Ainsleigh. I wish you would’ve told me. Told us so we could help you. You didn’t have to suffer alone. We would’ve been there every step of the way,” she said as she sobbed into my lap.
Looking up at Dylan, I noticed the extreme sadness etched in his features, which confused me. Was his sadness for my situation? Or was there more to his story than I knew?
Aspen pulled back, looking at the floor as she wiped her eyes.
“When did you get these?” she asked, as she traced each tiny line on top of my left foot.
“The summer after our freshman year.”
“How did I never see them?”
“I covered them with tattoo makeup. I didn’t want to have to explain what they meant and who they were in remembrance of. I’m sorry for not telling you. I just couldn’t talk about her our first year there. I’d just lost her. It was too hard. The more time passed, the harder it got to confess, so I didn’t.”
“No more secrets, missy. From this day forward, we tell each other everything so we can be there for each other. Deal?” she asked as she stood up and walked over to the couch to sit beside Dylan, who remained quiet the entire time.
“Deal. What’s wrong, Dylan?”
“I’m just so damn sorry I didn’t notice your pain. How did I miss it when we lived together for three damn years?”
This was the Dylan I knew and loved. He was the caregiver. Someone who took pride in knowing what you needed before you even knew.
“I didn’t want anyone to know. I didn’t want people to pity me. I needed to handle losing her in my own way, which I can admit now, I didn’t deal with it at all. I’m starting to heal more now. That’s why I wasn’t there this morning. I went to visit her grave. And Gentry brought me back here to face the room that would’ve been hers. I didn’t want to see it, but I’ll admit that I needed to face it head on in order to heal the right way.”
“Since we said no more secrets, I have something I need you guys to know,” Dylan spoke.
“My mom miscarried my brother when I was twelve. She was twenty weeks pregnant. No explanation as to why. One day he was moving, the next he wasn’t. I still remember how sad she was. How sad we all were. It was hard. I know what you went through. It wasn’t my child, but it was a baby we all were so excited to have arrive. After that, my mom didn’t want to try again. That’s why I’m an only child and she’s so protective over me.”
We all apologized for his loss. That explained his sadness moments ago as I confessed. I hurt for his pain. Aspen wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered something to him causing him to smile.
She leaned back over at me and started tapping her foot on the floor. That was her telltale sign that she was nervous to ask something.
“What do you want to know, Aspen?” I said with a laugh, causing Dylan to laugh along with me. Gentry looked confused, but I’d explain it to him later.
“Something just hit me. You said, ‘given the circumstances.’ What circumstances would those be? I have so many questions, but I’ll only ask that one. For now.”
Thank goodness. I couldn’t take one of Aspen’s crazy interrogations today. I’d usually have a glass of wine in hand when she warned me of her impending thousand questions days, but I couldn’t do that now that I was pregnant. So I’d need a few days before she called me and laid them all out for me.
Gentry and I looked over at each other, silently asking what we should do. I didn’t want anyone to know in case something happened in the first trimester, but they were my best friends. I could trust them to keep this a secret until we were ready to reveal it.
“Yesterday when I went to the hospital because I fainted the doctor gave us the reason for what caused it. I was dehydrated. That part wasn’t a lie. But I wasn’t exhausted. I’m pregnant. Probably around four weeks along if I did the math right.”
I could tell she wanted to dance around and be happy for us. But with what I’d just confessed, she refrained. She knew what I was thinking. I needed her now more than ever, and they were both leaving. Shit.
“You guys are going to miss your flight if we don’t get a move on. I don’t want to be the reason you don’t get home in time.”
“We’re not going,” Aspen stood and shouted.
“What?” Gentry, Dylan, and I all said in unison.
“I can’t leave her here. What do we really have to go home to? We haven’t found jobs yet. We could make our lives here. Besides, it’s beautiful. I could see myself living here. Can you, Dylan?”
His eyes moved back and forth between hers as he took in the weight of what she wanted. I could tell it was tempting for him to make this rash decision, but another thing about Dylan was he was the one who was a meticulous planner. He didn’t do anything on a whim. He weighed all of the odds before he decided.
“Let’s do it,” he said, surprising both Aspen and me.
“You won’t regret this, Dylan. I promise. We’ll start looking right away.”
“Where will we stay? I love your parents, Ainsleigh, but I can’t impose on them,” Dylan said.
“Here. You can stay here with us. We have three bedrooms. There’s plenty of room. The guest room is already perfectly set up with everything that you’ll need. It’s got a queen-size bed and a walk-in closet.”
“Are you sure, Ainsleigh? We can find something in town if it’s more convenient.”
“I’m sure. That’s what we’re here for. You guys are family to me. I wouldn’t have it any other way. The house is paid for. We only need to cover utilities and such,” I told them.
I felt a sense of relief knowing they weren’t leaving. Gentry looked over at me and gave me a knowing smile. He could tell I was anxious to say goodbye. Now I wouldn’t have to.
“We need to return to Virginia and pack up our things from storage. We’ll drive our cars here. It’ll take a couple of days, but we can do it,” Dylan said.
I was shocked he didn’t have a plan for after they left here, but I knew he’d waited to see what would come of confessing his feelings for Aspen. He would follow that woman anywhere if it meant she gave him a chance.
“Perfect. Let’s see if we can move our flight to tomorrow, and we can be back by the end of the week at the latest. I’ll call the airport. Do you want to call to see if we can get a couple of moving trailers? Both of our vehicles have the tow package. We should be able to fit everything in two of them since the house we rented there came furnished. Then we’ll have everything set to go. Thank you both for letting us stay here. I hated the thought of not having you in my life every day,” Aspen said as she bounced her way out onto the front porch to call the airline.
“Y’all are really doing this?” I asked Dylan.
“We are. I’m going where she goes. Even if it doesn’t last, I won’t regret it. I’ve loved her for most of our college years. I can’t leave her now. I can’t leave you either. I’ve gotten used to having you both around,” he replied as he stepped out of the room to find a trailer they could rent.
“Southern sounds good on you, beautiful?” Gentry said as he came up behind me and kissed the nape of my neck.
“Huh?”
“Y’all. Damn that’s sexy as shit. I didn’t think it was possible, but it is.”
“I guess those two have worn off on me over the years. Thank you for agreeing to letting them stay here. That meant a lot,” I replied with a laugh. It felt good to laugh and mean it for once. I was still hurting on the inside. That pain would likely never fully go away, but I could tell everything was starting to look up. With my friends staying here and Gentry by my side, I finally felt like I could conquer the world.
“Anything for you, beautiful.”