“You talk.” My mouth popped open, forming an O of astonishment.

“I didn’t realize dragons were masters of the obvious. I’ll have to put it in my notes.” The demon smiled and its teeth flashed.

“Your notes?”

“Yes, I like to record my observations about other life forms.” It took a step toward me and I growled. It rolled its bloodshot eyes. “I’m not going to hurt you or your mate. You saved me. I appreciate it.”

I swallowed. “I thought Red Furies were less . . . um . . .”

“I believe the word you’re searching for is civilized. Yes, I know. Most aren’t. Lucky for you and your mate, I’m not like my kin. Though I will admit that devouring that tasty little fairy felt good. I haven’t done that in a couple hundred years, at least. I’m usually vegetarian.”

“Vegetarian?” This was getting weirder by the second. Had I hit my head?

“I didn’t realize dragons parroted everything said. I’ll have to add it to my notes, too.” The Red Fury nodded like it would definitely need to do this soon.

“I don’t. Your notes would be wrong if you put that in there.” I might have sounded a tad defensive.

“Oh.” It pointed toward Quinn. “Is he okay? I have some medical training if you’d like me to take a look.”

“I don’t think that would be a good idea. My dragon is a little possessive.” And edgy.

“Ah, yes, I’d heard that about dragons.” It stood there for an awkward moment. “I’d introduce myself but, you know, I can’t give you my real name.”

“That’s okay,” I stammered. “I really don’t want to be in charge of a demon anyway.”

It laughed. “No, you really don’t. It never turns out well for those that do.”

“I can imagine.”

It smiled. “Can you?”

I shivered. “Well, I’m Twig—”

“Starfig. Yes, I figured that. Your father is Auric, right? You’re actually half-fairy. I’ve wanted to meet you.”

I furrowed my brow. “Me? Why?”

It shrugged. “What else? Curiosity. I’ve never heard of a dragon-fairy combo and I wanted to see you for myself. Little did I know I’d get to do it after being captured by your brother.”

“Half-brother.”

“Ah, right.” It frowned. “Is your father going to be mad you didn’t try to stop me from eating your sibling?”

“I-I really don’t know.”

“Does he know you’re bonded as the wizard’s familiar?”

“How did you know—”

“Oh please, I didn’t fall off the thorn-onion wagon yesterday. Give a demon some credit.”

“Right . . . So, we’re just going to go.” I bent down and scooped Quinn into my arms, watching the demon the whole time. This was surreal.

“I wish you wouldn’t.” It took a step toward us.

“Why?”

“Honestly, I’m lonely. And I have a lot of questions about you. Would you and your mate consider having dinner with me? I can pop us to a little tent near the Expanse that serves excellent vegetarian fare.”

“Uh, wow.” How to get out of this delicately. “That sounds nice, but I really need to get him and the unicorn horn back to Lighthelm as soon as possible.”

Its face clouded over and it bared its fangs, a snarl reverberating around the room. “I can’t let you take the horn. You could use it to force my name from me.” The demon’s voice had deepened significantly and sounded more beast than beauty now.

“No, no, we don’t want to do that. Perhaps you could leave and then we’d take it? We have to return it to its rightful owner. That’s what I do. I find things for others.”

And just like that, the demon stopped snarling, an eager expression on its face. “What? Like someone says they’ve lost something and you find it for them?”

“Or someone wants me to find a precious stone for them. Things like that.”

“You’re the one who posted that ad in the Daily Chronicles! I wanted to apply for the assistant position, but I figured being a demon and all, I wouldn’t really have a shot.” The Red Fury narrowed his eyes. “Would you consider giving me an interview? I’m really good with record keeping and I can brew a mean pot of forest-fury tea. It’s a secret family recipe. Guaranteed to put hair on your chest.”

Now we’d officially boarded the stagecoach to Crazy Town. I pulled Quinn closer, his face nestled in my neck. His eyes fluttered. Then he stiffened in my arms.

“Oh, he’s awake,” the demon said. “Great. I’ve never met a wizard with a dragon familiar. He’s pretty.”

A growl rose to my throat.

The demon held up his hands in a pacifying gesture. “I’m not coming onto him, Twig. He’s not my type, though he is attractive enough. I like the bad boys, though. Rawr, you know?”

This was getting weirder and weirder. Quinn elbowed me gently, letting me know he wanted me to put him down. I released his legs and let him slide down my body, never taking my eyes off the demon and supporting Quinn as he got to his feet.

I nudged Quinn behind me when it became clear he could stand on his own.

“You’re a Red Fury?” Quinn rubbed his eyes.

“Very good, wizard.” The demon beamed. “And please don’t assume I mean you any harm. Twig and I already had that conversation. We can discuss it again over dinner if need be.”

“I don’t know if we have time for dinner,” I said.

The demon’s face fell and its shoulders slumped. “Oh. Sure. I understand. You think I’ll go all berserker on you and crunch you down the way I did that annoying fairy.”

I actually found myself feeling sorry for it. What was my problem? I suddenly seemed to be the champion of any misfit creature crossing my path. It was ridiculous.

“We could find the time,” Quinn said. “Right, Twig?”

I stiffened, was about to blurt ‘no way,’ but the demon lit up like it was a gift exchange during Winter Solstice and I found myself saying, “Absolutely.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful. You just hold on a minute!” It disappeared without even the telltale noise that popping usually made. Strange.

“Where did it go?” Quinn asked.

“I don’t know.”

“Care to explain what I missed?”

I had just laid out the basics when the demon reappeared. Again, noiselessly. We both jumped, which seemed to amuse it to no end.

Speaking of amusing, it wore a plaid sweater vest, deep green bow tie, and pair of thick rimmed glasses. It also held a large tome and an ink quill in its hands.

“Sorry to keep you waiting. I needed to clean up and I wanted to make sure to bring my journal. I can’t wait to find out more about your bond.” It bounced on its feet like a small child when offered a treat. “This is so exciting. I get to meet the Twig Starfig and his wizard . . .” It scratched its massive head. “Beg your pardon, but in my rage to kill the fairy I didn’t catch your name.”

“Quinn Broomsparkle.” His voice came out a full octave higher than usual.

“A good human name. Though don’t you think a wizard should have a moniker, like Quinn the Powerful, or some regal title like that?”

“Never really thought of it. I only became a wizard a couple days ago.”

“Well, we could discuss possible names over dinner. I’d love to help you.” The demon clapped its hands in glee. It was creepy.

“Um, what are we supposed to call you?” Quinn asked.

“Oh right. I hadn’t thought of that. Well, that’s not really true. I’ve never liked my real name. Not that I’d tell you what it was anyway, obviously. Not without killing you right after. Hmmm, so perhaps you would be willing to call me William Jasper Reginald Butler the third? I’ve always thought that has a nice ring to it. Don’t you agree?”

“How about we call you Bill?” I said.

“Ooh, I like it. A working man’s name.” Bill nodded enthusiastically. “So, are you ready for dinner?”

* * *

If you told me we would be having a vegetarian buffet with a demon named Bill who only hours ago ate my half-brother, I would have said you were smoking some hopped up jiggyweed. But here we sat on the edge of the Expanse in a giant tent that held a handful of tables and a huge buffet table in the center we could pick and choose from . . . especially once the other diners saw Bill and fled shrieking into the night.

“Oops.” Bill ducked his head. I’m pretty sure he was blushing, though it was impossible to tell against his fiery-colored skin. Guess we’d be leaving a generous tip.

The fragrant and spicy food tasted amazing despite containing no meat. My dragon only complained a little. Quinn seemed determined to try everything, and Bill was not far behind.

Over candlelight and with soft Sylph music playing in the background, Bill peppered us with questions about both dragons and wizards. Quinn talked until he was hoarse, asking Bill an equal number of questions.

“So, do Red Furies have gender?” he asked. When Bill looked astonished, Quinn blushed. “I wasn’t trying to be rude.”

“No, no, quite all right. How would you know, indeed?” Bill pursed his lips for a moment before continuing. “Yes, we have gender, but let’s just say we choose to hide the most obvious signs of it unless we’re in rut. Then we show what we have, so to speak. But as you can see, we don’t wear trousers or really any clothes. I just like the vest and tie—an affectation, I admit, but I’d like other creatures not to assume I’m about to eat their souls when we meet. It isn’t easy being so fearsome. Twig probably has some idea what I mean.” Bill shot me a questioning glance and I nodded.

I eyed the unicorn horn sitting next to Bill. I still needed to get a hold of it, except I wasn’t about to take on Bill, vegetarian or not. He might want to act refined, but we both knew what he could do when enraged. I never failed at any assignment, but I was about to now.

“You’re really set on the horn,” Bill commented at one point.

I thought about denying it. “It’s my reputation at stake. I said I’d return it.”

He nodded thoughtfully. “I understand. I’ll be happy to make sure it gets back to its owner.”

“I would think you’d hate unicorns if they can make you tell your name,” I said.

He shrugged. “Never met one before. I hear they’re beautiful.”

“If you like shallow, mean spirited, and rude, then sure, they’re beautiful,” Quinn grumbled. I pressed my hand against his lower back in a soothing motion. His shoulders relaxed.

“Remarkable.” Bill pulled out his notebook and scribbled a few notes. He documented everything. After he finished, he looked up. “I want you to give me a job. I was serious when I said I’m good with numbers. Plus, no one would mess with you if you kept a Red Fury on staff. We’d be a good team.”

He ran a finger over the unicorn horn in a not-so-subtle gesture. No job, no horn. I hated being blackmailed. I opened my mouth to tell him off, but Quinn said, “Can you file? Do you take dictation?”

“Of course. I’m really a well-rounded guy.” He practically batted his lashes at me. No. No way. My father would flip if I hired a Red Fury to work for me. Demons required a rigorous amount of paperwork—in triplicate—and even then there were so many bureaucratic obstacles it would take a miracle . . . well, someone like my father to navigate the spate of red tape.

Since Bill ate my half-brother, I’m not so sure my dad would be keen to help him. Or me if I fessed up to my role in Nyx’s demise. My father could throw both of us out of the Elder without even a backward glance.

Quinn placed his hand on my arm and a jolt of warmth spread through my body. While Bill’s eyelash fluttering didn’t do anything for me, I couldn’t say the same of Quinn’s. The guy was a bigger softy than me. And I was beginning to think that said something. I sighed, pushing my chair back. “Can I talk to you for a minute, Quinn? In private?”

He smiled and a dimple appeared in his cheek. “Of course. Excuse us for a moment, Bill.”

Quinn followed me to the front of the tent and I pulled him behind a large plant so Bill couldn’t see us.

“Are you out of your mind?” I hissed. “Do you know how much paperwork it would take to get a Red Fury a resident’s permit? And even if I could pull it off—which I can’t—why would I do that? Do we really think it’s a good idea to keep a Red Fury in the Elder? He’d be the scariest predator here, vegetarian or not. Do you have any idea what Red Furies can do?”

“No, and neither do you. Don’t let your prejudices color your thoughts. He seems like a good guy. I think you should give him a chance. Besides, he saved our lives.”

“Because we saved his.” I wanted to shake Quinn until some sense settled in that pretty skull of his.

He frowned. “You were willing to accept me as more than I appeared, but you won’t give him a chance. That seems unfair.”

“You couldn’t eat me whole. That guy”—I pointed toward our table—“could do it if I pissed him off. What’s to say he won’t?”

“What’s to say you won’t do the same thing to me?” Quinn crossed his arms over his chest.

“Uh, because you know me. Because I care about you. Because we’re friends. And, oh yeah, I promised not to eat anyone while living in the Elder. And there’s that whole wizard-familiar thing. I’m not sure I could eat you even if I wanted to.”

“Yes, but until you became my familiar I didn’t know that. I had to learn to trust you. And I did. I gave you a chance.”

“Because you’re a pushover.”

“I like him. We both know what it’s like to be judged for the way we appear. It seems cruel to do the same to Bill. Don’t you agree?”

I grumbled. Quinn raised an eyebrow. I grumbled some more. “Fine. But if he shows any signs of being violent, he’ll have to go. And I’m still not sure we can get the paperwork sorted—”

Quinn cut me off by throwing himself into my arms and kissing me silly. Maybe Bill wouldn’t be so bad.

Returning to the table, we rejoined Bill. He looked dejected—shoulders slumped, eyes glassy.

“You don’t want to hire me. It’s okay. I understand. Going out to eat with me was one thing, but you’d worry—”

“Welcome to Starfig Investigations.” I stuck out my hand.

His jaw worked, but no words came out. Considering how verbose Bill turned out to be, it was comical. I snickered. Bill launched himself over the table and snatched me up in a hug. He snagged Quinn, too, and danced around the restaurant with us clutched to his large chest.

“Can’t breathe,” Quinn wheezed. My dragon growled. Bill released us at once and we stumbled, but managed not to fall on our asses.

“Oh, sorry, boss, I forget how delicate humans are. Please forgive me, Quinn. I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”

“Hold up, Bill. I still need to get the paperwork in order. It’s going to be a major pain in the ass. We may even be required to go in front of the residency board to prove you won’t be a danger. I’m going to guess they’ll want a magically binding document to make sure you won’t kill anyone . . . uh, else . . . while in the Elder.”

“I could still pretend I’d eat someone though, right?”

Since I did the same thing myself, I chuckled, then nodded. Bill and I shared a smile. You could ask the predator not to hunt the prey, but you couldn’t ever really pull his teeth.

Quinn shook his head. “Well, now that it’s settled, let’s have some dessert.”

I leaned over to Bill and whispered, “I think he’s pregnant.”

Bill guffawed and Quinn spun on his heel, calling over his shoulder, “I heard that.”