Chapter Twenty-One
Five Years Ago
I was going to die. They were going to fucking kill me.
Who takes meetings with FBI agents? Who?? Girls that have death wishes, that’s who.
I remembered what Fat Jack looked like all bloated and disfigured and dead. Oh, my god, that was going to be me.
Was there a way to get word to Sayer first? They would have to kill me. That was a given. But I didn’t want to be strung up by my feet. That was my one wish. Sayer would intervene on my behalf, wouldn’t he? I mean, he’d of course let them kill me. But he owed me some kind of dignity after five years together, right?
I didn’t want to die upside down like some twisted version of the apostles. I didn’t want my tongue cut out or my hands chopped off. I didn’t want to be gutted.
Mason Payne walked into the abandoned warehouse flanked by two federal goons. Some of my fear disappeared in light of misplaced pride. Was the big, bad, FBI agent afraid of little ole me?
That put a promising spin on things.
I pushed off the column I’d been leaning on and walked over to face the absolute bane of my existence. A chance meeting when I was fifteen years old had propelled me into a never-ending game of cat and mouse with this guy.
Sometimes I was the mouse. And sometimes I was the cat. Today, I was the confused snake. I thought I was in control, but this could be the day when the cat figured out how to bite me in two.
He promised this time was different, but Mason’s promises meant nothing to me. Mason took lying to an entirely different level. I mean, I was a professional liar too, but his were buried treasure chests and holy grails and the arc of the covenant—pretty and shiny, but the booby traps would kill you before you ever reached the prize. They were heavy with deadly consequences and dangerously light on the reward. I didn’t build houses of cards based on promises of immunity or lessened sentences. I didn’t dangle plea bargains in other people’s faces pretending like they were Christmas presents.
I didn’t use the law to manipulate, coerce and control.
Coughing to cover a smile, I tried not to check out his clothes, which were significantly nicer than anything I’d seen him in before. And by nicer, I meant designer. The last time we’d “run into each other” had been three months ago at a fundraising party for a senate seat race. All of DC had come out in their best black tie to throw money around like it was confetti. Only Mason’s best black tie was from the discount bin at a men’s big and tall store. His cheap polyester and coffee-stained tie were a walking fire hazard.
Of course I wouldn’t have missed an opportunity like that. The pakhan wanted a certain judge’s cooperation in an upcoming case. And I wanted the Cartier pearls that belonged to the wife of a certain judge. I had been posing as an aid for the judge until I could get the code to his super safe and find an opportunity to break into it. The job was taking longer than I had originally anticipated.
So that meant attending a high-profile function—which I knew was a dangerous game in itself given the amount of law enforcement power present. The function wasn’t all aboveboard. I’d spotted Irish soldiers near the bar and an Italian underboss dancing with his wife. There was even a South African drug lord near the food table.
But had Mason singled any of them out? No. No, he had not. And when he’d asked me to dance, I couldn’t say no. He’d given me shit about him being close to finding something on me and I’d given him shit about his sense of style.
Out of the two of us, I was the only one with accurate information.
Not that I believed I was completely untouchable. But so far, I’d covered my tracks. I’d been careful. I’d kept my hands clean and my nose clean and done my due diligence with every job. Save for the one he tried to run me down at when I was fifteen.
Luckily for me, the man had no probable cause to arrest me or detain me or question me. He had nothing on me. He’d simply recognized me from a list of potential Russian-associated Sixes. And being the green little newbie to the bureau he was, had decided to take that opportunity to introduce himself with a spectacle in the most public of ways.
Now he was like a dog with a bone. He couldn’t let the Russians go. It was personal to him for some reason. I didn’t know why because I had never bothered to ask him and what research I had done turned up nothing on the guy. He was a straight up enigma.
“Caroline Valera,” he said as way of greeting. “Nice of you to join us.”
I rolled my eyes. “Did I have a choice? Because if so, I’d be happy to reschedule. I have shit to do.”
“You might want to clear your schedule,” he countered. “This might take a while.”
Warning bells blared in my head. Run, my instinct screamed. Get out while you still can. I spun around only to find more agents had entered behind me. This was a trap.
My lip curled back. I was a cornered wolf. “What’s going on, Payne? Are you going to arrest me?”
His voice softened as if trying to soothe the wild animal inside me. “Calm down, Caro. We’re just here to talk.”
Mason had taken it upon himself to use my nickname, like we were friends or something. He was maybe the most irritating human on the planet. But right now wasn’t the time to correct him.
“Go on,” I ordered, feeling increasingly uncomfortable. “Talk.”
He stepped closer to me so we were only inches apart. He held a file folder in his hands and tapped it against his open palm in a nervous sort of gesture. “I’m only telling you this because we have history, okay? This is a favor I’m going to do once. That’s it.”
I swallowed the building panic, waving my hand for him to hurry this along. To be fair, we did have a sort of history. For the last five years I’d managed to interact with him on a semi-regular basis without giving anything up. Not that he hadn’t tried. And not that it wasn’t tempting sometimes.
He’d even offered witness protection at one point. That had probably been the most difficult to say no to. A new life? A clean slate? And all I had to do was put a giant target on my back by ratting out the entire operation first?
Thanks, but no thanks. That was not how I wanted to start over.
Besides, I knew without a doubt Sayer would never go for it. He was on his way to becoming a spy. There were rumors that the current two from our family were about to retire. They were old. They were making mistakes. Minor mistakes, but everybody knew it was better to quit while you were ahead. Then the way would open up for Sayer and Atticus. Gus would eventually become the bookkeeper. Our future was as good as made.
I was happy for Sayer. This was everything he had always wanted. He respected the bratva and in return, he was rewarded. And he deserved it. He really did. Nobody was more loyal. Nobody worked as hard or as long. Nobody could do what he did.
He was invaluable to the brothers.
He would never leave them.
And I would never leave him. When I was younger, I’d wanted a different life. But that was before Sayer. Now I only wanted a life with him. And that meant I would have to take the syndicate with him. That meant eternal entanglement with the bratva.
That meant more thieving.
“We’re moving on the brotherhood,” Mason said. “In a way you’re not going to like.”
Fear spread through me like frost over a window. I was clean. He didn’t have anything on me. I knew that. Because if he did, he would have arrested me by now. Mason wanted to pretend like he could take me in at any second and didn’t because we had some kind of dysfunctional relationship. Like he was doing me some kind of favor by letting me live my life and that meant I should trust him. I knew better.
But what about Gus? Francesca? Sayer? Had they been as careful as me in all of their dealings? Had they always covered their tracks? And recovered them? And then buried them six feet under?
“Who?” I demanded. Mason didn’t drag me all the way out here to dangle empty information in front of me.
His head dipped with a meaningful look.
Sayer.
“He’s the best chance at taking down the entire organization.”
I let out a sharp breath. “If you’re arresting him to make him talk it won’t work.” I shook my head at how ridiculous it was. “I won’t. And he definitely won’t,” I promised. “You don’t have enough on either of us to make anything stick.”
Mason flinched, forcing me to doubt myself. “We have enough, Caro.” Holding his hand up, he started ticking off the counts. “Grand theft, fraud, bribery, money laundering, identity theft… should I go on?”
“You have nothing real. That’s all speculation,” I told him, only half-believing my words. Sayer only worked with me some of the time. The bosses had him on all kinds of jobs, most of them he didn’t talk to me about.
Mason’s expression was sympathetic… pitying. “What’s amazing to me is how white collar his crimes are. It’s the drugs, trafficking and weapons we’re after. But don’t misunderstand, we’ll get them any way we can.”
My throat felt like sandpaper and I couldn’t swallow. True panic pounded inside me, a firing gun that sent my heart into a dead sprint. “Why are you telling me this?”
He stepped forward—the cat cornering the poor, helpless mouse. “We want you to encourage him to talk to us. We’ll give him a deal, Caro. We’ll give him a really good deal. But he needs to trust us and that isn’t going to happen unless he has your support.”
I rolled my eyes and sniffled. “Sayer knows a good deal. If what you’re offering is so great, shouldn’t that be enough?”
“Sayer Wesley doesn’t care about deals, offers or anything. He only cares about you. We both know that’s true. He’ll listen to you. He’s not going to listen to us. We’re on the wrong side of the law.”
Tilting my head, I sized him up. “Maybe you should rethink your life plan.”
His lips twitched, hiding a smile. “Maybe you should rethink your life plan, Caroline. We both know you want out. Here’s your opportunity.” His shrug was casual, coaxing. “Talk to Sayer. Work your magic. We’ll get a chance to clean up the worst crime syndicate in this city’s history and you’ll get a chance at a new life, away from all this. We can help, you know. You should let us.”
Damn it all. It was the lure of a fresh start that tugged the hardest. God, what would it be like to live away from this? To not have the bratva following us around everywhere we went? To not have the threat of an arrest or the bosses’ displeasure hovering over us at all times? What would it be like to live free of crime and thieving?
But I couldn’t ponder that out with Mason. “When?” I asked instead. “How long do I have?”
“I can’t tell you that.”
Which meant soon. “I need time to talk to Sayer. He won’t be easily convinced.”
“Then be more convincing,” Mason countered.
I threw him the middle finger and turned around, done with this conversation and the FBI. I was done with this whole fucking day. “I got to go,” I told him over my shoulder.
“Hey, Caro,” Mason called after me. “This is not your opportunity to run. We have eyes everywhere. You will not make it to the city limits before we have you in the back of a van. And if you make me chase you down, I will publicize the hell out of it. Your arrest will be on every television across the nation. Everyone will know you’ve been corroborating with the FBI. I will go on fucking CNN and shout your name. I’m a very motivated man. If you make me chase you, the generous deals are off the table. All of them. I’ll make sure you don’t even get your mandatory phone call. And then I will prosecute you to the full extent of the law. For everything. I will find it all, to the last unpaid parking ticket. Your options are this: work with us and get our help, or don’t work with us and experience the full Biblical-like wrath of the federal government.” His voice trembled with his conviction, promising every last threat.
I believed him. He would turn the bratva against me and then take away the government and I would be left to fend for myself. In other words, he planned to feed me to the wolves. He was basically signing my death warrant.
He held my gaze. “If I were you, I would choose wisely.”
Anger and resentment burned on my tongue and threatened to spew from my mouth. I had so many nasty things to yell at him. But this was the FBI. And he was giving me a chance to persuade Sayer. He was offering a way out. So, instead, I pushed them down and nodded. “Noted.”
I left the warehouse and headed back to town. I had to walk for twenty minutes before I could find a taxi, but it gave me time to think, to sort through my feelings.
When I talked to Sayer, I would have to pin this entirely on the feds. Sayer didn’t know I occasionally talked to Mason. It wasn’t like I ever gave Mason anything, but Sayer would feel betrayed if he knew the agent sought me out every once in awhile.
There was a chance that Sayer wasn’t the only one that would feel betrayed. The entire bratva would get in on that action. I knew how that scenario ended and I wasn’t in a hurry to bleed out upside down.
So I’d have to be tactful. Careful. I’d have to lie.
Good thing I was so good at it.
I gave the cabbie the address of one of the bars the bosses owned. Sayer and the guys hung out there during the day to talk business and have meetings and drink vodka. All the vodka.
Vinnie opened the back door for me and I made my way to the front room. I always felt jarred by the sight of a bar with its lights on, all her rough edges exposed, the bright light glaring on the secrets she preferred to keep hidden during the night. After meeting with Mason, I could relate.
I found Sayer at a table with Atticus and Gus. They were playing cards and drinking. Typical Tuesday.
Sayer looked up and noticed me, smiling wide, his eyes darkening with secrets only we knew. The good kind. The kind that made my heart ache for the life Mason offered. The kind that made me consider that new life, away from all of this, away from these people and the ugly, terrible things we were responsible for.
“There she is,” he said with that half smile that still made my belly flutter. With a jerk of his chin, he said, “Come here, Six.”
I moved to him, pressing a kiss to his lips when he lifted his face to mine. His tongue caressed my bottom lip until I kissed him back, lured by the sweet temptation of his mouth. He didn’t care that we were surrounded by his crew and his bosses, this moment was ours.
I gave into him. I always did. Our tongues tangled together while he tasted me slowly, intimately, too familiarly for public or this place. His hands moved to my waist, bringing me in between his legs, holding me close to him. I dropped my hands on his shoulders and tried to keep my wits.
It was impossible. This man was too much. Too irresistible. Too tempting. Too distracting.
Pulling back, I smiled down at him, lost in sharp desire and his blue, blue eyes and all the hope I had for us. “Can I talk to you?” I asked him in a low voice.
From across the table, Atticus’s patience had worn out. “Are you two done yet? We’re in the middle of a game.”
Sayer shot him a glare. “Don’t be an asshole.”
“Don’t make me wait,” Atticus returned.
I squeezed Sayer’s shoulders, hoping to regain his attention. “It’s important.”
“I’ve been looking for you,” Frankie said from behind me. “Where have you been today?”
Glancing at her, I wondered what to say to her. Would the FBI relocate her too? Or would she be a casualty in the war.
I couldn’t do that to my friend. I would find a way to take her with us.
“Are we playing or what?” Gus asked. “’Cause I got shit to do if this is turning into a girl’s night.”
Frankie smacked the back of his head. “You would be so lucky. When’s the last time you hung out with a girl? Consensually?”
He folded his arms over his chest. “I don’t like what you’re implying. All of the girls I hang out with are there consensually. Which is why there are so few of them.”
Sayer and Frankie laughed, but I felt urgency tug at my gut. “Sayer, seriously can I talk to you for a minute? Alone?”
His eyes moved back to mine, finally seeing the worry in my expression. His brow drew down, making a crease over his eyes. “Sure. Yeah. Is everything okay?”
“No,” I whispered, my voice breaking with the weight of what I needed to tell him. For the first time it hit me that the feds were going to take him. Take Sayer. They were planning to arrest him. Mason had warned me not to run, but how could I not?
I couldn’t let them take him. Not even for a short amount of time. And what if he didn’t want to cooperate with them? Then what?
My insides started to crumble. They were a building that had just been demolished. A wrecking ball straight through my heart and now the foundation surrounding it was disintegrating, dissolving into ruin.
That wasn’t an option. He would cooperate. When I laid out the whole picture, when I explained the entire plan, he would see my point of view and listen.
He stood up, his hands staying on my waist. “Okay, Six. Let’s talk.”
“Maybe we could go for a drive?” I suggested. And never come back. Just get in the car and leave.
He was just about to respond when someone came running from the back, the casual atmosphere exploding into frenzied hysteria. “Feds!” the Six hollered over the din of conversation. “They’re outside!”
The room exploded into action. Some of the guys ran to the back, scurrying to hide drugs and cash and other paraphernalia the feds would love to find. Girls came out of the woodwork, pulling articles of clothes on and clasping their bras as they ran for the back exits. Roman walked from a side room toward the manager’s office all calm and collected, a man totally confident that not one of their charges would stick to him.
Sayer pulled me against him, wrapping his arms protectively around me. Frankie moved behind the table with Atticus and Gus. And there we waited.
There was no point in running. There was no point in freaking out. The feds were here. We just had to wait and hope that they didn’t have anything on us.
Only I knew differently. We would all get arrested. We would all sit in bare, isolated rooms with two-way mirrors and armed guards. We would all be questioned. We’d done this enough times before that us veterans knew we had nothing to worry about.
It just wasn’t true this time. We had to worry.
Especially me.
Especially Sayer.
The feds came in their usual manner, busting down doors and shouting orders. They filled the room like a swarming hive of black wasps, guns pointed, vests strapped to their chests, helmets and visors on.
Sayer stepped back from me, raising his hands in the air, docile, compliant. I had a harder time letting go of him. Don’t, I wanted to scream. Don’t let them take you. But I couldn’t. The second I gave away even a hint that I knew about this beforehand, I would be a traitor.
I would be Fat Jack.
I would be dead.
Once the establishment was secured—armed agents were everywhere and most of the bratva were on the ground—Mason Payne walked in donning his regulation navy blue FBI jacket. I glared at him, trying to murder him with just my thoughts. How dare he dangle a carrot in front of me and then rip it away just when I started to believe I could catch it.
My stomach twisted when I realized he’d probably followed me here. He’d tricked me. He’d used me. I stared at him, daring him to read my mind.
Liar. Manipulator. Asshole.
I would never trust the feds again. Least of all this guy.
His smile sickened me as it stretched again. He spun in one, victorious circle and twirled his finger in the air. “You know what to do, people. Round ‘em up!”
And so began the arrests. They started with Roman, who walked with his head high and his shoulders squared, despite the handcuffs securing his hands behind him. He winked at Sayer as he walked by, but that was the only change to his otherwise stoic expression.
The other brothers weren’t here, which was lucky. And neither were the two spies or Ozzie or my dad. But there would be plenty for the FBI. For them, this was a fantastic day.
They started moving guys from the back first, walking them out to the armored transport vehicles. We stood there with guns pointed at us, waiting for our turn.
“Is it that time of the month again, Payne?” Sayer growled.
“It’s Payne’s time of the month,” Gus chuckled darkly. “Take some Midol, buddy. It might help with the rage raids.”
Mason turned to them and grinned like the cat that ate the canary. “Laugh it up, Augustus. You’ve got some fun charges coming your way.”
Gus’s eyes narrowed and his smile turned cynical. “Looking forward to watching you try to make them stick.”
Mason shrugged. That was it. He just shrugged. He didn’t continue to argue or throw out ambiguous threats. He just shrugged.
The tension between the five of us shot up, our blood pressures going with it. My mind spun. Did I have anything to worry about? If Mason had used me to get to Sayer, had he also lied about charges being brought against me?
Wait, he would have needed a warrant first, right? And he couldn’t have gotten one between the warehouse and now. Not unless he had the judge on standby.
Maybe he did.
Sayer dipped his head, closer to my ear. “We’re going to be okay, Six. Just like all the times before, this is going nowhere.”
I wasn’t sure that was true. I turned fully to face him, holding his gaze and begging him to just get it. Leaning in, I dropped my voice and whispered, “Let them help you.”
He jerked backward, his eyes growing wide as he let my words sink in. He didn’t ask me to repeat what I said though. He just stared at me like I was a ghost.
Turning around, I caught Atticus’s eye. He had been watching us. Shit. My heart started hammering harder, faster. I was sure he couldn’t have heard us, he was all the way across the table.
Mason watched us too. He caught my gaze and raised an eyebrow, silently asking if I’d talked to Sayer. Which was really nice of him since he’d given me so much time. I wanted to punch him in his smug face. Instead, I turned to look at the wall and lifted one shoulder to scratch my ear, signaling that I hadn’t.
I didn’t risk looking at him again, so I didn’t know if he had a reaction or a thought or a feeling of fucking guilt. But it didn’t matter anyway. Soon enough it was our turn to be marched outside.
Mason motioned for his men to start with Gus, putting me at the end of the line. I didn’t know if he planned it that way on purpose, or if it was spur of the moment as I walked past him.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered under his breath, stepping in front of my path to fidget with my handcuffs. His head dipped and I had to strain to hear his whispered confession. “I didn’t know we were moving until after you left. We had to wait for the warrant.”
Fury burned in my blood, clouding my judgment. Twisting my neck, I hissed, “Save it. You’re a fucking liar.”
“That’s amazing coming from you.” He stepped back and motioned for one of the other agents to take me outside.
I didn’t say another word to him, which ended up being a blessing. At the edge of the dining room, Atticus had moved behind Sayer somehow. He had eyes for Mason in a way that made me nervous for the federal agent.
We didn’t speak until we were outside, but we had to wait in line while they loaded us one by one. Atticus turned to me, paranoia darkening green eyes. “What did he say to you?”
I let out a longsuffering sigh. “Who?”
“Don’t play dumb, Caro. It doesn’t suit you.”
My expression was tired, impatient. “Oh, Payne? I don’t know. Threats as usual. This time his charges are going to stick. This time I better fess up. This time blah, blah, blah.”
“Did he offer you a deal?”
The truth tightened my throat. I didn’t have an issue lying, especially to people like Atticus. But this time, the truth held a weight I wasn’t used to. This time, the truth was scarier than ever before. “Not yet. But he will. I’m sure he’ll offer you one too. Isn’t that the dance with these guys?”
His voice dropped to a whisper. “You better not take it.”
I blinked at him. “Are you serious?”
“Yes.”
“I would never take a deal, asshole. I’m offended that you would even question my loyalty.”
“I question your loyalty every fucking day, Valero. You’re a snake.”
That was rich coming from him. I smiled politely and stepped by him to get into the back of the truck. “And you’re a dickhead.”
“Everything okay?” Sayer asked, his eyes on Atticus.
“Just peachy.”
“Super fucking okay,” Atticus growled as the doors closed with a final slam behind us.
That was it. They dragged us to their offices, threw us in isolated interrogation rooms and picked us off one by one.
By the end of the night, most of us were allowed to go home. I caught a ride with Gus, Frankie and Atticus and we headed back to Gus’s for the night. We waited for Sayer to join us, but he never did.
In the morning, they charged him with counts they planned to prosecute and I realized my worst nightmare had come true.