CHAPTER 45
Dane
Damn! I was nervous.
I strode downstairs a few mornings after Kenzie had gotten our new puppy, wondering if I was ever going to get up the nerve to propose to Kenzie.
The ring had been burning a hole in my pocket since we’d arrived back from Sebastian’s wedding.
I wanted to ask Kenzie.
But the last thing I wanted was to rush her.
What if she said no? Or that she wasn’t ready. I didn’t think I could handle that. Yeah. Okay. Chances were that she’d agree. But what if she didn’t?
I wasn’t the kind of guy to really jump headfirst into anything. But with Kenzie, everything was different. I needed her tied to me in every way I could possibly make happen.
I fucking loved her.
I needed her.
And I couldn’t imagine life without her anymore.
Some fucked up, primitive, possessive part of me needed her to be mine in every way. Problem was, I doubted even marriage would be able to calm down my protective instinct.
She’d been hunted like an animal before she’d ever really been an adult.
Maybe I should let her have her freedom.
Or…maybe not.
“Fuck! I’m pathetic,” I whispered irritably to myself as I went to search out my woman.
Kenzie was usually awake before me, and she was almost always in the kitchen.
“I’m doing it today, dammit!” I said fiercely under my breath.
I wasn’t going to be able to wait anymore.
I met with Theo in the kitchen. “Where’s Kenzie?” I asked.
He motioned toward the French doors. “She took Lucky for a walk. Coffee is made. I’m taking mine to go. Got work to do.”
Theo grabbed his travel mug that I assumed was full, made his way to the front door, and exited.
I filled a mug and went to the French doors to look for Kenzie. I wasn’t used to the house being so damn silent.
Kenzie had changed my home, and my life.
Usually, it was alive with her energy, and I never wanted it to be quiet again.
I’d spent too much of my life alone, and I’d never really gotten used to it. Maybe I’d told myself that I was content, but I wasn’t.
I think I’d always just been waiting for her.
“She’s going to marry me,” I grumbled as I made my way out to the beach. If she wasn’t ready, I’d wait. Hell, there was no time limit on how long it took to convince her. I just knew that I’d never survive without her anymore.
I stopped on the sugar sand, covering my eyes as I scanned the beach along the coast of the island.
No Kenzie.
Logically, I knew she hadn’t gone far. We were on a goddamn island. Where could she go?
Still, my heartrate accelerated, and my adrenaline kicked in as I searched for her.
Because of her past, and the way I felt about her, I was always going to worry when I couldn’t find her. Losing her was my fucking nightmare.
I heard the distant sound of a dog barking over the sound of the small waves hitting the shore. It was calm, and there wasn’t really an angry surf this morning.
I sprinted down the sand, stopping abruptly as I finally saw Kenzie, and my body tensed as I spied her out in the water.
“She can’t swim that well yet. What in the fuck is she doing?”
We’d been slowly working on her ability to keep herself afloat, but she still wasn’t a strong swimmer. It was going to take more time.
Lucky had her paws in the water, but even she didn’t attempt to follow Kenzie into deeper water. The canine was barking up a storm, trying to convince Kenzie to come back.
“Smart dog,” I rumbled.
I quickly shucked off my jeans, then tossed them on top of Kenzie’s clothing. I hadn’t bothered with any other clothes, so I was naked when I waded into the water.
“What in the fuck are you doing?” I grabbed her arm as I approached.
She visibly startled before she turned to face me.
Jesus! I hated it when I saw fear in her expression, but I was pissed because she’d ventured into the water without me. There were strong currents along the island at times, and given her novice swimmer status, it scared the hell out of me to see her alone.
“I’m fine,” she bristled. “The water is calm, and it’s not deep enough to have to swim.”
“There’s a drop-off just a few more feet ahead.” I was pissed, but my anger was caused by my fear.
Her face fell. “I didn’t know. It seemed safe enough.”
She probably would have been safe. Even if she’d stepped off the sand bar, she could have easily swum back to where it was shallow, but there was no reasoning with my anger.
“Get out of the water,” I demanded, letting go of her arm so she could trudge back to shore.
“You’re here now,” she reasoned.
“Get. Out.”
For an instant, she looked like she wasn’t going to move, but then she turned toward shore and made her way back to the sand.
I followed closely behind her, my temper barely contained.
She picked up her T-shirt and plopped down on the dry top. “I’m fine. You can go now,” she huffed.
Oh, hell no. I wasn’t leaving until she understood that she couldn’t do anything that could risk her life. I spread out my jeans and sat beside her. “I’m not leaving until you do.”
Lucky pranced around for a few moments before she finally scampered into the shade to take a puppy nap.
“I don’t need a keeper,” she answered in a snippy tone.
“Too bad. You have one anyway. I can’t leave you alone for a minute without you trying to get yourself killed.”
“Is that why you’re angry?” she asked softly. “You thought I was going to die? Dane, that’s not reasonable. I was perfectly safe.”
“Bullshit! You can’t swim well yet. One bad current, one wrong step and you could easily get swept away. Dammit! Don’t you understand that if anything happened to you, I’d never survive it, Kenzie? You’re my whole damn life now. There won’t be a ‘me’ without ‘you.’
Maybe I was pathetic, but it was the truth.
Kenzie’s eyes filled with tears as she looked at me for a minute before swinging her body over mine, straddling me.
I told myself not to be swayed by her beautiful naked body over mine, but I was starting to fail miserably.
All I had to do was feel her soft skin touching mine, or catch a whiff of her seductive scent, and I was toast.
“Thank you for worrying about me,” she said against my ear. “But you can’t boss me around like a drill sergeant. I don’t like it.”
Had I been that bad? “I was scared,” I admitted.
She stroked my wet hair back from my face. “I get that. But the risk was minimal, and it’s hot this morning. All I wanted to do was get wet.”
“I can get you wet,” I rasped, my mind snapping the moment she mentioned getting wet.
She laughed, a musical, happy sound that made my heart swell up in my chest.
Kenzie hadn’t had many reasons to laugh in her life, and I loved it when she did. It was happening more and more, and the shadows in her eyes were slowly fading.
“There’s no doubt you can get me very wet,” she said seductively.
I looked up into her eyes, my heart hammering as I saw the love that I needed right there in her expression.
Holy fuck! I knew instantly that I was a goner.