Chapter 15
Addy shaking my shoulder was my wakeup call the next morning. She had been crying for a while, judging by the puffiness of her eyes. I sat up and tried to recall where I was. Home. I lay back down on my pillows and turned to face her. She sniffled, and started apologizing profusely.
“Addy, enough crying, I get it, but I don’t think you understand what you’ve done,” I mumbled, trying to snuggle back into the bedding.
“You were dead! I was afraid to be alone. What happened to Mom and Dad was awful, and your dad was gone, I didn’t know what to do. Lachlan was sweet; he and his men offered to protect us. It seemed like a good plan, Ems, we buried you,” I rolled over and stared at her blankly. They’d buried me? What the hell was she talking about and how creepy was that shit?
“Emma?” Grayson peered at me from the doorway before he ran for the small bed and jumped on me. His exuberance was contagious and for a brief moment, I forgot my resentment. “I knew you weren’t dead. I told them you’d never leave me. I told them,” he whispered as he sobbed in my arms.
“I know brat, but they had good reason to think I wouldn’t make it,” I replied with tears thick in my throat. I hadn’t even thought about what Grayson would have gone through. I’d been selfish, but the idea of men such as Lachlan and his men taking over the shelter put me on edge.
“I love you, Emma, to the moon and stars,” he whispered as his sobs ebbed.
“I love you beyond the moon and all its glory. I love you brighter than the stars could ever burn in the sky, brat,” I answered back.
I looked over the top of Grayson’s head to find Addy watching us with an uncertain look in her soft brown eyes. I nodded to her, and before I could blink, she’d wrapped herself around us and started crying again.
“I’ll never leave you two, you know that. I understand why you did what you did, Addy, but I don’t know them and I sure don’t trust them.”
“I didn’t sleep with him. I slept with his brother,” she blurted.
“You were sitting on his lap…?”
“They share, but I wasn’t into that, well, I might be. I was really tempted,” she admitted as my eyes widened as I moved to plug Grayson’s ears. “His men do it as well, but only Kyra took them up on it.”
“Uh, okay…” I said unsure of what to say about it, and I wasn’t quite sure we should be talking about this in front of my baby brother and his virgin ears. I had read enough to know a lot of the kinks of sex, and I’d enjoyed the books, but that didn’t mean I’d be jumping on the ménage sandwich bandwagon anytime soon. “So basically they came in, took over, had an orgy, and decided to stay awhile?”
“It sounds really bad when you put it like that,” she said and her face fell again.
“It is okay, Addy. Maybe it’s time to allow others to help. We were barely pulling it together, and I’m tired of being on the losing end. I was reminded not too long ago that I expected people to be like they were before the world went to hell, but they’re not. There are a lot more evil ones out there than I ever realized and the more that come here, the more I wonder what the hell we’re fighting for. It will be nice having more men around to do the heavy hitting and lifting for a change.”
“You’re sure? ‘Cause I can kick them out; now that we have you, Emma, we can make it.” Addy’s soulful eyes snapped eagerly with her words.
“And maybe you can finish my training?” Grayson piped up hopefully. I narrowed my eyes for a moment at him.
“Uh, let me get situated and we’ll talk about that,” I glanced back at Addy, resigned to what needed to be done. “As long as they keep their kinky fuckery to themselves, I’m fine with them staying. No one goes into my father’s rooms. They are off limits to outsiders. Other than that, if they can help out, they can stay.”
A little while later, I was standing in the shower, the water running over my naked body—it felt blissfully good. I was still standing beneath the spray of water when Lachlan stepped in, and joined me. He was naked, and his hands pulled me close against his chest.
“I’ve been watching ye, lass,” he rumbled as I jumped from beneath the water with surprise by his silent entry. “Yer as stubborn as a newly born bairn, ye are.”
“You’re naked, and in my shower,” I pointed out as I tried to ignore what he was pointing at me. His cock was hard, and I could smell his anticipation burning in his veins. Jaeden’s had been a missile, but Lachlan certainly was a close second and I could have sworn the thing winked at me.
“Oh aye, yer in it during my scheduled time so I figured ye were making peace with me,” he smiled as his eyes slid over my naked body.
Since when did we have scheduled showers? The only schedule we had was five minutes per body, and he had come in and taken over. He had some nerve!
“Is that what you thought? Let me just ease your mind. I had no intention of showering with you. I figured no one would be here since water restrictions were set to keep the pumps from going out. You should learn the schedule, and show it to your men. This is my shelter, Lachlan; you and your men are guests. You will follow the rules so that it continues to run, and work smoothly. ” I pulled the towel off the rack and wrapped it around my curves.
My heart was racing, and as he moved closer, I felt the tingle in the pit of my stomach which normally only responded to Jaeden’s touch.
“Yer nae really expecting Jaeden tae follow through with ye, are ye, lass? He’s nae that kind of man; he fucks his prey and then leaves them heartbroken. He will only break ye, and leave ye when he’s had his fill.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s none of your damn business,” I whispered.
His arms pinned me against the wall, as he lowered his mouth to mine. I could have struggled, and should’ve. I didn’t though, because I wanted to see if I responded to him as I did with Jaeden. Lachlan’s mouth was soft, as he moved over my lips seeking entrance. I opened my mouth and kissed him back. While there was a steady thrumming sensation in my core; it was nothing like I felt with Jaeden.
It wasn’t until he picked me up and growled against my mouth, that I stopped him. “No, put me down, now!” I panicked a little and tried to push him away.
Instead of putting me down, he rubbed his cock over my slick heat and smiled. “I could make ye mine, bonny Emma, so fucking easily. One thrust and ye would be mine,” his voice came out as a rough snarl that scared me.
“I said no, Lachlan. I don’t want this to be my first time,” I whispered as I listened to his heart as its beat increased with my words.
“Yer a bloody maiden,” he smiled as his eyes searched my face.
“I’m a virgin, yes,” I replied as his mouth crushed forcefully against mine but I didn’t kiss him back this time. I turned my head away from him with the stark realization that I wanted my first time to be with Jaeden. Even if he left me afterwards, I wanted him.
“Ye want the leech?”
“Why do you call him a leech?” I asked as I fixed the towel and slipped my slippers back on. He barked a short laugh.
“If ye havenae figured it oot yet, ye should ask him, but when he breaks yer heart, Emma, and he will, I’ll still want ye.”
I blinked. Would he break my heart? What if I just wanted meaningless sex with him? “What if I break his heart?” I asked with a devious smile on my lips.
“Then I’ll want ye even more, sweetheart.” He grinned wickedly.
I dressed and left the shelter to visit the scene of the crime. Memories were coming back at a slow trickle. Some of it I figured was delirium, because well, it just had to be. I could think of no other reason for me to have those images in my mind, except that I knew what pain medicine could do to the human mind. It played tricks, and made you hallucinate. The only other logical explanation was they were both screwing with my head and that was too awful to think of.
I stood on the cliff with a new outlook. One, I was changing and I wasn’t sure it was a good thing. Two, I was becoming hard and cynical and I hated that I was. Three, life wasn’t a certain thing. I could die at any moment and if I did, I’d go with so many regrets. I didn’t want to die before I experienced Jaeden, or found pleasure in his touch. I wanted to leave my mark in this new world, and I could sense something coming.
It was as if there was a storm brewing, and we were standing on the edge of it. I could taste the tension, thick in the air, and I could sense that a lot more people would die. Innocent people would die. I closed my eyes as the wind blew my hair, and when I turned around, I knew I’d find him standing there.
He was dressed in a white V neck shirt. His jeans were slung low over his narrow hips. He’d pulled his hair back, but loose strands had worked their way out of the thin leather band. He wore a necklace, dangling from it was small silver disc medallion with a raven carved into it.
He said nothing, just watched me as I took him in. I stepped closer to him and was about to tell him what I’d just figured out, but his eyes grew hard. “You’ve fucked that dog?” his words were harsh, but the anger I felt in him was harsher. “I leave you alone for one fucking night after saving your life, and you fuck him?”
“I didn’t fuck anyone,” I snapped irritably.
“No? Then tell me why the fuck you smell like wet dog?”
Wet dog? I rolled my eyes and laughed. One, because I hadn’t been anywhere near a damn dog, and two, he was jealous. “I haven’t been around any dogs for a long time; besides, I took a shower just a little while ago.” I looked off in the distance, still trying to get a handle on the way my senses were over compensating. “Speaking of which, Lachlan kissed me and I kissed him back,” I replied honestly.
“Why?” he demanded crisply.
“Because I wanted to see if he made me feel what I do when I kiss you,” I said quietly as his eyes narrowed.
“And does he?”
“No, his kiss was nice, but it doesn’t make me…” What? Wet? Swoon? Want to rip his clothes off and check out his wood? I could still see myself becoming a woodpecker and pecking Jaeden.
“Wet?” he asked as he stepped closer. “My kiss makes your sweet, succulent petals wet.”
“Yes,” I shook my head as I turned back towards the cliff. “He said you would break me, and then break my heart. Was he right?”
I didn’t flinch as his arms wrapped around me from behind or when he pulled my body back and close to his. “Come with me somewhere?”
“Where?” I asked as I felt his hands as they rose to palm my breasts.
“To a little place I found,” he whispered against my ear.
“I should get back to the shelter. I didn’t tell anyone I was going out,” I admitted.
“Good; come with me and I’ll take you home when we are done,” he assured me as his thumbs rubbed seductively over my nipples. “I promise to be on my best behavior,” his voice was sensual and far too difficult to resist.
I turned in his arms and raised myself up on my toes to bring my lips against his. His kiss was slow, and sent goose bumps over my flesh. This felt right, but I wasn’t ready to just give myself to him. Yes, I wanted him to be my first, but I wanted him to prove he wanted me for more than just a been there, done that.
I moaned against his mouth as he broke the kiss and placed a soft kiss on my forehead. He clasped his fingers through mine and held my hand as he walked me through the woods, to a small little crystal blue pond. We Towners called it Haven, because it was a little haven most didn’t know about in our small town.
I gave him my back as he removed some of his clothes, or at least I hoped he still had some of them on. I heard a splash as he dove beneath the water. It wasn’t that deep, so obviously he’d been here enough times to know the depth. Most people didn’t try to dive here; then again, Jaeden wasn’t most people.
He surfaced and shook the water from his long hair and gave me a glimpse of his impressive back. It was all muscle. Thick black tattoos that were Celtic in their design, from the look of it, covered his shoulder blades. My eyes drifted down to the gentle curve of his ass, and I bit my lip as heat burned inside my abdomen. He had quite a few scars, and I absently wondered where he’d gotten them. Had he been hurt in a war? He fought like a warrior, so maybe he’d been active in the military.
He turned, and my mouth went dry as the Sahara Desert as I watched him move toward the water’s edge. His abs looked as if he worked out every freaking day! He had more of a swimmers body, but damn! I was pretty sure they didn’t make men like him anymore, especially since there was a massive shortage of people these days. This man screamed sex from his every pore. Even as unknowledgeable as I was in that department, I wanted him to be my professor and teach me the kink. I was such a freak…
“Join me,” he said and I twisted my lips up into a smile. I’d planned on swimming a little later today, so at least I’d dressed for it.
I met his eyes and caught the silent sparkle of laughter in them as I kicked out of my boots, and started working the buttons on my pants. “Turn around,” I said shyly.
“Don’t think so,” he smirked, and continued to watch me. I rolled my eyes as I pulled off my shirt and jeans and left them folded on the shore. I gave a quick tug to fix the bottoms of the swimsuit. The suit had a pink and black skull-print halter bikini top. Little black bows joined the cups to the halter and the matching bottoms had black ruffles on the butt. “Skulls,” he mused.
“I was going through a phase when the world went to hell,” I explained.
He laughed as I stepped into the water. I met his gaze, and immediately wished I hadn’t. The turquoise blue in his eyes reminded me of the pictures of the Caribbean oceans that I’d always wanted to visit. The depths in them were a cove of treasure I could easily get lost in. I made myself ignore him and focus on how cold the water was.
“This is freezing,” I shivered a bit as I made my way in slowly. Of course I’d known it would be, since it was fed from a natural spring that ran beneath the ground. I screeched as he splashed my back with the icy water. I turned and glared at him. “Why did you bring me here?”
He smiled, but refused to answer. Instead he moved closer to me as his eyes moved over my pale flesh. “Do people always have to have a reason to bring you places?” he asked as he moved closer to where I stood.
“We’re sorta stuck in limbo, and most of the world’s population is dead from what I can tell, and you want to swim? Are you sure you’re not from California? Maybe you’d like to find some waves after this, surf a bit?” I asked as I turned around to look at him better. This was a waste of time. And yet, here I was in the water with him. Worse part was I didn’t want to leave here, or him.
My eyes skimmed his body until they focused on his thin patch of happy trail, again. I moved them lower and my mouth went dry. “Please tell me you’re not naked.”
“I’m not naked,” he purred and lunged towards me. He grasped my arms and pulled me against him until I could feel with my thighs that he’d lied. He was seriously naked. Very naked! Unlike when I’d been in the shower with Lachlan, Jaeden being naked both terrified and turned me on.
“Oh my God! You’re naked!” I shrieked as I tried to push him away.
“Of course I’m naked,” he whispered huskily against my ear. “I’m bathing, and can’t do that in clothes, now can I?”
I turned the color of freshly picked Washington Red apples as he moved closer against my body if it was even possible. My jaw trembled as I looked up at him. “I’m not going to sleep with you,” I blurted. Hadn’t I just decided I was? I could do it now, but I still felt uncertainty as Lachlan’s words filled my mind with doubt.
“Who says I want to fuck you right now, Emma?” the gleam in his eyes told a different story.
“You’re naked!”
“I’m bathing; I like being clean. You joined me for my bath, little one. That’s all this is. Nothing more, your virtue is safe…for now,” his tone was teasing as though this was just a misunderstanding. Not.
“I thought we were swimming—” I stopped as the bushes at the edge of the brush rustled.
“Get behind me, Emma, now,” he ordered. I thought it might be good if I did as he asked, but only because I knew I couldn’t make it to any of my weapons before whatever it was in the bushes greeted us.
Lachlan and his men moved from behind the bushes and walked in our direction. I noted the lessening of tension in Jaeden’s back and peeked from behind him. “Lachlan,” he said in a neutral tone.
“Emma,” Lachlan said as his eyes grew hard at the sight of me in the pond with Jaeden. “Ye didnae tell anyone when ye were leaving.”
“I don’t need to check in to leave,” I replied a little harsher than I had intended to.
“I see Jaeden’s wasting nae time in getting ye into bed. I thought the kiss we shared would have at least made ye ponder yer options,” he ground out.
“She knows her options, pup,” Jaeden replied easily as he brought me around and held me in front of him like a shield against his nudity. I had to stop the cry that leapt to life in my throat as something hard and protruding pressed against my ass and my lower back.
“That better be a knife,” I hissed.
“It can penetrate supple flesh, and go very deep…if that’s what you’re asking, sweet girl,” he murmured in my ear.
I tried to pull my ass away, but his hands came down to settle on my hips. “I’d hold still, Emma, unless you plan on giving them a show. I’m not shy but I’d like it to be just the two of us when we fuck.”
I swallowed past the dryness in my mouth. I’d put myself in this position, and it sucked. I held the other men’s eyes as they watched us. Lachlan smiled, and nodded his head in my direction. Knowingly. Could he tell that Jaeden was naked, and that I’d kissed him? I could sense the tension between the men, and I was stuck in the middle of them, literally.
“Emma needs a real man, Jaeden, one who can show her what stamina is all aboot,” Lachlan continued.
“My stamina is just fine, pooch,” Jaeden replied genially.
“Ah, well a parasite such as yerself, does have persistence going fer it,” Lachlan grinned and his men laughed behind him.
I blinked at their banter. Pooch? Parasite? What the hell was up with the names? I decided they needed to come up with better ones if they were going to insult each other.
“Why do we nae let the lass decide on whom is more adapted tae serve her needs?” he taunted.
This is where I probably should have said something, instead the hardness against my back pushed against it and the silkiness of it made the butterflies in my belly fight to get out. I absently arched my back and pushed my ass up until Jaeden’s fingers pushed harder against my hips. “Do that again and you’ll be losing the bottoms of this skimpy suit here and now, and I won’t be sorry,” he warned in a heated whisper. Jaeden’s arm’s wrapped around me protectively as Lachlan stepped closer. He turned me in his arms, and I swallowed as I felt his heated flesh against mine.
“I say we fuck this bitch,” one of Lachlan’s men who I’d met earlier today, called out. His twang sounded more Midwestern, rather than the Scottish burr like Lachlan and many of his men had. Dawson had given me the creeps then, and was doing so again. “Show her the difference between us, and I’ll bet she’d take us all with that sweet body.”
“He would nae touch ye, Emma lass. Nae, I’d cut off his balls if he tried it,” Lachlan growled and snapped an angry order to Dawson.
I heard a scuffling noise, and then a deep growling noise from an animal. I turned to look at what was happening but Jaeden’s arm tightened, pinning my body tightly against his chest. My head was held immobile with the other. It was then I realized that his member was pressing against my navel, pushing against my piercing. I tried to move, but his grip only tightened.
I glanced up to watch his face as his eyes narrowed on the men in front of us. Another moment passed, and his grip loosened enough that I could pull away from him. I turned, looking to where Dawson had stood, the only thing in that spot were scraps of cloth I hadn’t noticed before. What the hell?
I looked at Lachlan and the other men, who had their arms crossed and were still watching us closely. I chanced a glimpse at Jaeden, and then stepped away from his naked form.
“Run along; you’re interrupting us,” Jaeden ordered them with a smirk framing his lips.
“I’d tread carefully with her, Jaeden; she’s unlike those sluts ye normally fuck. She deserves someone who will protect her, and doesna have tae follow orders.”
“Is that so? Let me guess, you’re that man?” Jaeden continued as his cock pressed against my flesh again.
“She’ll know everything soon enough,” Lachlan warned as he turned and walked away. His men closed ranks around him as they walked into the dense forest that surrounded the little pond.
“You guys really don’t like each other, do you,” I stated.
“He’s a means to an end. As I told you, we were friends once, but that was in another place and time,” he said with a wolfish grin on his lips. “Why didn’t you kick them out of your shelter, Emma?” he continued.
“Because I’m tired of being alone and they did step up and help everyone while I was gone,” I said tiredly. I started toward the edge of the water, but didn’t make it there before Jaeden pulled me back to him. “You have a serious issue with personal space.”
“You’re not alone, you have me,” he whispered with a serious look in his beautiful eyes.
“That’s not what I meant. I’m tired of holding everything together. Addy likes them, and the girls don’t seem to mind that men are around.”
“Did anything unusual happen to you last night?”
I turned my eyes to the water’s surface, and the waves that kissed his naked flesh. “I don’t know, Jaeden. Should something have happened to me?” I asked, imagining my hands running over his bronzed flesh instead of the water. I licked my lips absently as he moved to stand closer, since I’d backed up yet again. The tip of his cock broke the surface of the water like a periscope, and God help me, I couldn’t look away from it. I gasped as his hand cupped my chin and tipped my face up.
“Emma, if you keep staring at my dick I won’t be able to control the urge I’m fighting right now. I’m trying to be a gentleman.”
“What urge is that?” I asked before I could think better of it.
“This urge,” he said and pulled me close to his body as his hands dropped to my thighs and pulled me up and out of the water until my legs wrapped around him. His lips found mine and kissed me intensely, as if he was starving for my kiss.
I moaned against him until his hand pulled on the bottoms of my suit. I pulled away and shook my head. “No, Jaeden.” He leaned his forehead against mine. He remained silent as he dropped me slowly back into the water. “I’m sorry, I’m not like that. I’m not some bimbo who will just jump in bed with you.”
“It’s just fucking, Emma,” he said softly. ”Jeg ønsker å begrave min kuk så dypt inne i deg, søt jente.” *
“What language is that? Scandinavian or something like Viking, right?” I asked with a guarded look burning in my eyes. I didn’t trust him, and yet I felt pulled in his direction. As if something was pushing us together. As if forces I couldn’t understand were at work here. Even after everything we’d been through, I still felt the need to guard myself against him. He gave a slight nod of his head, and a small smile stole across his lips.
“Norwegian,” he acknowledged.
“Jaeden doesn’t exactly sound like a name from Norway.” Okay, now his friends Bjorn and Sven were starting to make sense.
“Changed it; you wouldn’t be able to pronounce my birth name,” he quipped.
“And it was?” I pried.
“Járngrímr, it means iron. It’s a mouthful and while back home it was a fairly common name, here in the states it wasn’t something I wanted to listen to people trip over saying.”
I moved from the water and gave him my back as he worked his way up to where his clothes lay. He was silent as he dressed. I shoved my legs into my jeans and turned toward him as I felt his eyes on me.
My eyes feasted on the tendrils of water that dripped from his immaculate chest. I looked up to his right pectoral where a raven was perched, tattooed into his flesh. “The raven, what’s it stand for?” I asked noting the outline for the map of Scandinavia on this other peck.
“In mythology it was used for a gateway between life and death, but most who saw the raven believed that it was linked to the God Odin. They believed the raven was his eyes and ears in the realm of the living, so they would always appear in pairs before a great battle. In the Pacific Northwest, it was a talisman to the Indians.”
“Is that why you have two of them?” I asked, noting the one on his arm was perched on a skull. I’d absently stepped closer to him, now within touching distance; if he noted this, he did well hiding it. I lifted my hand and ran it over raven and moved it to the script-looking words. “And this?” I asked as his flesh tensed beneath my touch.
His hand flew to mine, and gripped it hard as his eyes watched my response. “Careful, Emma, I’m trying very hard to be a gentleman and walk away from you. Don’t make me do something we might both regret later.”
I smiled. “You sound way older than you look,” I turned and headed back for my shirt—but didn’t make it there before his hand pulled me back. “Emma, how many men have you laid with?” My jaw opened in surprise at his question, seeing that he seemed to be pretty singular in what he wanted.
“Not sure why you’re asking, Jaeden, didn’t you say it’s just fucking?” I teased, but froze when I caught a flash of anger in his eyes as the muscle in his jaw ticked wildly. His grip tightened on my arm, which caused my eyes to flare in panic. I was heading into fight or flight, and the only thing that kept me from running away was his own eyes widening as he realized his grip had tightened painfully on my arm. His features softened for a moment and then confusion registered on his face.
“Emma, you should go,” he muttered distractedly as he dropped my arm and turned to bend over and grab his remaining clothes. ”Du bedre kjøre hjem, før jeg glemmer hvem jeg er og ta det jeg vil ha.” **
My jaw dropped at the tinge of anger in his voice and sudden shift in personality. I watched his back as I wondered what the heck had just happened. What had I done wrong to make him act like this?
*~*~*
* ”Jeg ønsker å begrave min kuk så dypt inne i deg, søt jente.”
“I want to bury my cock so deep inside you, sweet girl.”
*~*~*
**”Du bedre kjøre hjem, før jeg glemmer hvem jeg er og ta det jeg vil ha.”
“You better run home, before I forget who I am and take what I want.”