Chapter 16
The next week seemed to go by slowly, but it was very productive as everyone worked together to help gather supplies. Lachlan’s people melded easily with our group. I hadn’t seen Dawson since that uncomfortable incident at the pond and wondered where he had been sent, or if I needed to worry that he would be back.
Lachlan remained his usual likable self; often trying to charm or tease me, yet I could sense that some of it was an act. His men had also been watching me closely everywhere I went. It was as if they knew something wasn’t quite right with me and they were prepared to take action if I should step one toe out of line. Secretly, I was uncomfortably afraid that they might jump the gun and do me in as I also knew in my heart that something wasn’t right with me.
Mental snapshots of bizarre images kept flashing through my mind and I was terrified to speak to Addy or anyone else about it. No matter how hard I had been trying to adjust since the missing weeks, I still couldn’t get comfortable. I felt like I’d been crawling out of my skin, as if something I couldn’t put my finger on was changing along with my senses. It was growing worse with every passing day.
One afternoon, Lachlan suggested that we might want to boost everyone’s spirits by having regular Friday night parties, which I’d thought was idiotic but it had a positive vibe and effect on the people that I just couldn’t argue with.
Tonight I’d dressed in my old scavenging uniform of mask, black fatigues, and combat boots to patrol the area and make sure that everyone was safe. I didn’t join in on the frolicking, for lack of better description, much to Lachlan’s irritation. He tried to convince me that I could use a night off, but seriously, it wasn’t safe here anymore and while I could agree with his reasoning for the party, I couldn’t enjoy myself.
Earlier in the week, we’d found bodies savagely dismembered and left in places that suggested we were meant to find them. It was as if someone was baiting us, or trying to scare the shit out of us…and it was working. Except for this evening, when Lachlan set up a sound system and brought everyone outside to party. He’d even supplied alcohol, which I thought should be saved for medical purposes…His men had laughed as if it was one of the funniest things they’d ever heard.
I walked through the crowd of people until I reached the tree that had the best view of the land that surrounded the shelter. I climbed it with purpose and sat on one of the highest branches that would hold my weight. I looked out at the silent woods, noting each of the sentries Lachlan had posted to safeguard the group. My mind wandered as I kept watch and as usual, my thoughts came around to Jaeden.
He’d either forgotten about me, or decided I wasn’t worth the chase anymore. I hadn’t seen him at all this week and I actually missed him. All the way back to the shelter, he barely spoke to me and seemed to be bothered about something, and I wasn’t sure if it was something I had said. I also noticed that since that afternoon, Lachlan had been trying to impress me.
It was working, and with each passing day, I did warm up a bit more to him. But, there was still this sick infatuation I had for Jaeden. I felt as though there was in invisible string that kept pulling me to him, several times I almost found myself heading in the direction of the estate he and his men had appropriated, only to catch myself and try to find something else to occupy myself with. Each of them had qualities I was drawn to, yet really had no experience with. Lachlan was self-assured, charming, smart, and protective. While Jaeden had those qualities as well, he was also crass and demanding. If I was smart, I’d go with Lachlan, who I knew would be gentle with me for my first time. But I didn’t want gentle, I wanted Jaeden and his friggin’ dirty mouth.
The things he’d done to me, and the way he demanded I do things was intensely hot. I’d known he was into control, and I’d give him as much as I could, which wasn’t much…but I was willing to try.
A movement in my peripheral caught my attention, and the hair at the back of my neck stood up. All of my senses were screaming at me that something wasn’t as it should be. Alert. Defend. Fight. I looked down to the group who was dancing and drinking. “Idiots,” I growled as I started to descend from the trees. I sniffed the air and my body vibrated with a sense of dread that I couldn’t interpret. Something was moving through the woods at an alarming speed. I hit the ground with a thud and kicked out as the first red eyed wolf broke from the thicket.
It was so quick that I wasn’t even sure I’d killed it. As if a switch was flipped, everything began to move in slow motion for me, and I could see in the dark as well as I could in the day. One second I’d kicked out at the first wolf, and the next I’d brought two knives out of my pants, and had driven a blade into a second wolf’s guts. Another one lunged, and I barely avoided being hit by its wicked claws, and the knife I’d held fell to the ground. I heard screaming, but ignored it as I brought my hands up, grabbed with sure hands, and snapped the wolf’s neck.
The next one bit my arm, and I could have sworn I’d heard the bone snap, but couldn’t have since my arm felt fine. I palmed the waistband of my pants, brought out the small Sig Sauer, and shot it at point blank range. Blood splattered over my face and God knew what else. A fifth one lowered its head and growled. I moved forward to strike at it, but it took off before I could.
I looked back at the group which was now gone and only Lachlan and his men remained. They stood staring at me as if I’d grown horns and a tail. I looked from them to the dead wolves and blanched. My heart stopped beating. My blood ran cold, because there were no wolves at my feet—they were humans. I choked on tears as I took in the carnage, wondering if I was losing it.
“I killed wolves, not humans. Not humans,” I whispered brokenly. I was losing it. I squeezed my eyes shut and opened them as I fell to my knees. “You saw it, right?”
“Emma, ye should come away from them,” Lachlan whispered, as if the dead would rise. He held his hands out to me and I stared blankly.
“I killed them, but I swear they were wolves! How is this possible?” I whispered. My voice sounded small and scared. I’d killed wolves; they’d had fur! The fur had shed on me and I still had it on my friggin’ clothes!
Lachlan pulled me up but I shoved him away. I was covered in blood, and fur! Fucking fur! I turned and left them standing there. They could figure out what I’d done, but I had to get away from this. Now. I started running and didn’t stop until I dropped to my knees. I looked up to find Bjorn looking down at me.
“You okay?” he asked cautiously.
“I killed them,” I cried.
“Who?” he asked as he dialed numbers into a phone.
“The wolves, but they weren’t wolves, they changed…to humans…which is crazy, because wolves can’t change into humans. Right? It’s crazy! One minute they were wolves and I killed them and then they were human, which is impossible!”
“You killed wolves?” Bjorn asked.
“Emma?” Jaeden’s voice reached my ears and I bolted into his arms. “Whoa, you’re safe.”
“I killed them,” I said as my hands trembled and my body shook.
“Killed who?”
“I killed four wolves that had red eyes. I killed them, but they changed…I’m losing it, right?” I whispered against his chest. Safe; I felt safe here.
“You killed four rogues?” he asked cautiously.
“No, I killed four red eyed wolves that changed into humans!” Was he missing the whole they turned into human part?
“Impossible,” an Irish accent said from less than a foot away from us. I could sense I had heard it before, but I couldn’t place it.
I looked at the newcomer with trepidation pulsing through me. Every fiber of my being said to run away from this man. He had inky black hair, with startling violet eyes. I got a chill just looking at him. He looked ancient and yet not a day over twenty five at the same time. My skin crawled while my insides turned hot with need, as if I’d been with him before and far more intimately. Jaeden’s body seemed to stiffen up.
“She’s stunning, Jaeden,” he said as he stepped even closer.
I buried myself in Jaeden’s arms as if he’d protect me. “She is,” he confirmed. Then to my shock, he held me out as if to allow his friend a full inspection of my attributes. I struggled against Jaeden’s hold, as tears tried to push through. “Let me go!” I shouted, and Jaeden did as if my skin burned him. “What the hell is wrong with you?” I shouted as I took a small step backwards.
“Why did you come here, Emma?” Jaeden asked in a terse tone.
“My bad,” I said as I turned with as much dignity as I could and left him with his men.
I made it about twenty steps before Lachlan stepped from the woods and headed straight for me. I stopped and shook my head, warning away from him. The last thing I wanted was someone else who may suddenly run hot and cold on me. I had no idea of where to go, but after the dick move Jaeden just pulled, I just needed to get away from here.
“Emma, are ye okay?” he asked and when I nodded he continued on without me. I turned and looked back to find Jaeden glaring at me. I flipped him off and started towards the woods. Tears began to slide down my face at Jaeden’s behavior; what I had done tried to sink in, too. I say tried because I was either going crazy, or men had actually looked like wolves, which again, crazy. That kind of shit only happened in the movies.
I moved quickly into the outer edges of the woods and froze, because that same tingly warning hit me. I looked around the silent trees and stepped back into the clearing. I could feel the eyes from the men on me, but worse, I could sense a cold, malevolent evil watching me. I had no warning, but somehow I managed to side step the huge wolf that burst from the thicket. I reached for the knives, only to find the straps empty.
The wolf spun around and I kicked its jaw as my entire body spun from the blow. I punched out, and the yelp of the animal was sickening. It lunged again, but this time I was ready and I used both hands to grip its neck and twist it using its own weight against it, violently. The sharp snapping of bones made my stomach momentarily lurch.
I watched emotionlessly as it transformed to a tall brown haired man, whose neck and head were at odd angles to each other. I swallowed the sob that tried to leave my throat and turned to find the small group of men watching me in shocked silence. Some friggin’ help they’d been. I flipped them all off, as a sob escaped and I tried to put as much distance between myself and them as I could.
Maybe I was dreaming, or maybe I was actually dead and this was my hell.
*~*Jaeden*~*
All week, I had tried to stay away. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. The words we had at the pond rang in my head; it was just supposed to be fucking. No attachment, nothing different than any woman before her. Except Astrid. Astrid was once an obsession, and now I find that despite my vows, the feelings I have for Emma are far stronger than anything I had ever felt for Astrid. The pond was a sharp wake-up call that I was getting in far too deep with her, and I couldn’t allow myself to get in that far. I had orders, and they always came first.
She’d run to me. The knowledge was heady. The reminder came back to me that I couldn’t let this get any deeper. I didn’t want to feel for her. I didn’t want to chance her getting too close and feeling the sting of betrayal again. My heart knows she’s loyal to her core, but everything Astrid did destroyed any chance of having faith in women again. I wanted her, but I had to re-establish what our relationship would be. I wasn’t going to be her love; that much I was sure of. Fucking; that’s all it could be. That’s all I could allow. Bond or no bond.
This want. This attachment. Desire. Fuck it, this obsession wasn’t something I could deal with, or would chance happening again. If she wanted a quick, unattached fuck, I wouldn’t say no, but that’s all it would be. She should hate me for how I held her up for Shamus to inspect her. As if she was there for the taking. The last time he’d seen her, her body had still been behaving as if she was still in the thrall of change and had been unaware of him. It gutted me to offer her to another male, but it had to be done.
I hated that I allowed myself to want her this badly. I despised it, that she was in the shelter with Lachlan and his pack of mongrels. I hated that I wanted to keep her. The longing and anticipation, like a fucking green horn with his first voyage across the ocean. This coldness I felt, I deserved. This eternal fucking hard-on I had for her, again it was deserved for thinking I could have her.
“We got company,” Shamus’s voice broke into my thoughts as I watched the wolf move to Emma; concern was written all over his face. Instead of throwing herself at him as I thought she would, she warned him away with an angry hand. I narrowed my eyes at her response. She’s almost cold to him, as he said something and then continued walking to us.
“She took on a fucking rogue squad an win. She disna see the change an noo she thinks she’s losing it. She fucking fought like a banshee possessed.” I hadn’t heard him rattled like this before; to the point that his burr was so thick his words were almost unintelligible.
“That’s impossible and you know it,” Shamus spoke the words before I could.
“Aye, ye dinna think I ken it!” he spat.
I turned and leveled her beautiful ass with a killing glare. My senses felt the attack before the others. She moved with inhuman speed, as she dodged the giant brown wolf. Her hands moved to her knives, only to grasp air. I moved to lunge to her aid, but Shamus grabbed me and refused to allow me to pass; his sharp word was binding as my sire. I fisted my hands at my sides, helpless to do anything but watch as the wolf spun with lightning fast speed. It lunged at her, only to have her kick its jaw so hard that it stopped mid-attack. I watched her small frame shake, then the wolf’s head swiveled and it stumbled momentarily with a pained yelp as she followed through with a punch to its side that seemed to carry more strength than her small body should have been able to deliver.
“Watch this,” Lachlan’s calm voice was laced with anticipation.
I glared at him briefly before turning my eyes back at Emma. She moved much like we do, and there was a cold, calculated precision to each move she made. The wolf lunged at her again, but this time she wrenched its neck sharply, snapping it in one deft move. As the carcass slumped lifelessly, her eyes filled with tears, and I wasn’t sure if anyone else noticed. Her eyes grew wide with horror as the wolf transformed back to its human shape with his death.
She turned as a sob racked her small form, and flipped us off. That’s my girl. She’s fire in the midst of a storm, brave when most would cower. She’s stubborn to the mother fucking core. I turned to Lachlan and leveled him with a glare that would make most men cower and that niggling jealousy roared to life, and I couldn’t hold back any longer. .
“Have you fucked her?” I snapped, and watched as his eyes lit up with deviltry.
“Does it matter?” he laughed.
“Answer the fucking question,” I demanded, but he just smiled.
“Boys, simmer down. That human just took down a rogue alpha, and instead of figuring out who should be fucking her, you should be figuring out if we should allow her to live. She had a full transfusion of Jaeden’s blood, and yet she didn’t change into one of us, and I know she smells too fucking hot to be a fucking wolf. Figure out what the hell she is, and how to bring her to our side, or kill her. That’s what you should be worried about,” Shamus said as the voice of reason.
“Take her, Jaeden. She’d give up anything for him, do anything, tell us anything,” Sven pointed out with a wicked twinkle in his eyes.
Lachlan shook his head. “She’s done nothing but distance herself from the entire shelter in the last week. She eats with us, and tries tae avoid conversation. She goes oot on runs, but she does it alone. She makes lists and stockpiles supplies. It’s almost like she’s on auto mode, and unable tae shut it off.” He catalogued her daily movements thoughtfully and I hated that he knew every aspect of her daily routine.
“Maybe she doesn’t care for your company?” I offered.
“She deals with me just fine, Jaeden, and several times a day. She’s breaking away from her group, as if she’s protecting them from herself. Ye changed her, even if ye didnae turn her. She’s not the same as she was when I first got tae town.” His eyes bored accusingly into mine.
“I’ll go to her,” I whispered as I moved through them and headed to where I knew she would be. The change may not have occurred, but I could feel her presence inside of me as if it had. I could feel her in me, as if I’d sired her; the bond was minimal and limited, but there. She’d gone back to the cliff, where this had all begun.
I watched her from the trees as she kicked the ground where she’d gone over, and then teetered on the edge. My heart pounded faster as she held one foot over the edge as if she was considering jumping. She moved back and swiped angrily at her tears.
I could feel her walls closing down as her mind tried to grasp what she’d done. I stepped out from behind the trees and headed to her. I could tell that she felt me as I moved closer, and I felt the bond as it reached for her, but she was stronger than most. She was resisting it. She somehow managed to hold it at bay, but barely.
“Emma, come away from the cliff,” I whispered and flinched as she leveled me with a nasty glare.
“Go to hell, and take your fucked up shit with you!”
“I deserve that,” I replied.
“You’re damn right you do! You held me up as if I was yours to give away! I came to you for help and you threw me to the wolves!” she blinked as if her choice of words were sour.
“What do you think is happening between us, Emma? Did I make any promises to you?” I snapped, and watched as her eyes narrowed and leveled me with a cold look. “You asked me once if Lachlan and I were friends; we aren’t. He used something of mine that I cared for; he was just one of a long line of betrayals that stemmed from the same poor decision. I made a vow to never allow myself to be in the same situation for it to happen again.”
“Something?” she spat out. “I’m not a fucking something! I’m a friggin’ human being! How dare you treat me like that just because you have some fucked up shit going on in your head. News flash, Jaeden! I’m not yours to give away! I’m not fucking anyone! Not now, not tomorrow, and not ever! That also includes you!”
“You’ve not fucked anyone?” I asked carefully.
“It doesn’t matter! There’s so much more happening right now! You need to get your friggin’ priorities straight. I killed a wolf who was a man! In what friggin’ world is that right? I’m going crazy!” she swiped angrily at tears. “I’m afraid to be around my friends and my brother because I’m seeing shit! I have dreams that scare the shit out of me, as if I’m actually in them. I don’t know what you did to me, but you should have let me die!”
My heart clenched at her words. I watched her face carefully and took a shot at the truth. She deserved this; the only question was how she would react to it. “Werewolves,” I said simply and watched as her eyes flew to mine.
“Okay, no wonder why I liked you so much, you’re crazy too!” She sniffed as she wiped at the tears again. “You’re so full of shit, Jaeden. But thanks for playing along with my crazy mindfuck of a day.”
I laughed, but was empty. I flashed my fangs and, startled, she stepped back towards the cliff. I reached out and pulled her to me. She fought against my hold, and it took everything I had to pin her. This small woman was now a match for me or any of my men. She went still suddenly, as something else caught her attention. She looked at me, then to where Lachlan stood in wolf form. His green eyes gave him away.
“Holy shit,” she said. “I went to sleep and woke up in Twilight!” she laughed, and continued. “Oh! I get to be Bella!” she giggled more. “Oh, wait, Twilight was like, PG, can we kick it up to an adult version and so help me God, Jaeden if you sparkle, I want to see that penis pulling off a disco ball in the sunlight!”
Yeah, it was very possible she’d been damaged in the fall. I shook my head at her strange hysteria, and I had absolutely no idea what she was talking about. I think she was making fun of me, which stung. I finally spelled it out for her and I’m not sure what I expected, but it certainly wasn’t this.
The wolf nodded and left her to me. Everything in his bearing told me that it was only for now. Her shoulders shook, and I felt her pain. The confusion of everything I’d just thrown at her. The shock at everything she had experienced tonight. Her soul pulled at mine, shredding my resolve and my legs moved towards her against my will. I walked up and stood beside her, slipping my hand through hers, threading my long fingers through her delicate ones.
“Lachlan, and his men,” she started hesitantly. “I didn’t kill any of his men tonight, did I?” she asked and then her shoulders released the tension they’d held in them.
“No; his people and my people are fighting against those packs. It is a long story, but know that we will protect you and your people, Emma.”
“Did you ever find the wolves that killed Bonnie and Jillian?” she asked with a guarded look in her eyes.
“We found the squad that killed them about two weeks after their deaths. I put them down, personally. They hurt you, maybe not physically, but like most things rabid, they needed to be put down.”
“This can’t be real, right? I’m dreaming,” she whispered brokenly.
I pulled her to me, and tilted her chin. “Does this feel like a dream?” I asked, before lowering my hungry lips to hers. She was silk to my leather, innocence to my brutality. My tongue pushed past her teeth, and the noise she made started a maelstrom in my balls, and tightness coiled in my stomach. I groaned as I deepened the kiss, while her arms wrapped around my waist.
I wanted nothing more than to lay her on the ground and ravish her body. I picked her up and approved of how her legs wrapped around my waist. Her hands gripped my hair, as if she was afraid I would remove my mouth from hers. Not a fucking chance. I kissed her harder, my nostrils flaring with the scent of her sweet nectar as it dampened her pussy.
I pulled away, my eyes searched hers for the one answer I needed. She didn’t give it. She unwrapped her legs and pulled away instead. “You can’t be real, because that would mean you really did feed me your blood to save my life. That I wasn’t hallucinating…”
“I did, and would do it again in a heartbeat, Emma,” I whispered through fangs that slid further from my gums with anticipation. Her eyes focused on my mouth, and I watched as her small hand lifted to my mouth and stopped.
“Can I see them?” she questioned, and I nodded. “Do they hurt?”
“Only when I deny them the sweet taste of you,” I replied with a crooked smile breaking across my lips.
“Do you want to taste me?”
“Yes,” I replied with my heart racing at the mere idea of tasting her sweet, intoxicating blood again.
“How does it work?” she asked with a shyness that I hadn’t seen with her before.
“I’d kiss your flesh, and caress it with my tongue. My saliva would release a numbing agent, to prevent you from feeling pain from my bite. I would pierce your skin, and I’d feed from your blood.”
“Does sex and feeding really go together?”
“Yes,” I replied hoarsely, as I wondered where she’s taking me with her questions.
“So if I allowed you to feed from me, I’d have to allow you more?”
“No, but I’d want more. I’d want you at my mercy.”
“What does that even mean?” she asked innocently.
“I’d want to control you. I’d want to dominate you, to have your full submission in the bedroom, Emma. For a woman to submit to a man in the bedroom is one of the ultimate gifts she can ever give him. To give her body and mind to him, and trust him enough to satisfy her needs.”
“It sounds kinky,” she whispered with wide eyes. “Way more than I think I could commit to,” was her sultry reply as I clasped her chin between my finger and thumb.
She gasped, and I smiled at the sweet sound of it. “You’ve already had a taste of what I can offer you. The spanking, when your pussy filled with the proof of what it made you feel? You were soaked for more abuse, and then when you came in my mouth…That Emma, is what I need from you. I could teach you everything, if you’d just let me.”
She nodded as though she was considering it. “Maybe one day,” she swallowed. My insides clenched at her soft words. I’m not a nice guy, not since the day Astrid betrayed me, and then fed me to the wolves, literally. I had made a vow to never let myself get that involved with a woman again. Not even Emma with her supple curves, and her wide eyed stares.
Even now she pulled at me, her soul knowing me as though she was fated to become mine, and it was fucking strong. I hated that I wanted her, that I was trying to tempt her, even knowing she could rip me apart. I’d been there, and hated the idea of it happening again.
Shamus wanted her. He’d said it as soon as he heard about her. She was a cock magnet, and a fucking hot one at that. Raphael hadn’t even made it this far north yet, but I was sure he’d want in on her as well. He was my best friend, but also had a fondness for fiery redheads.
I can’t afford any distractions right now, not with the rogue wolf packs moving in to test our defenses. Testing us, as they convert her kind into theirs. She could die tomorrow, and I couldn’t take the chance of her becoming a weakness. I had to get her back to her people and I needed to circle back to mine. The thought of the mutt being so close to her was like choking on my own sword, but unless she was prepared to take only what I can give, he was her best protection.