From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 1, 2008 2:01 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: Surprise!

Aaron,

I’m glad you got the package! I wasn’t sure how long it would take to get there. Besides sending my brother things (and he’d never tell me he got them or say thank you), I’ve only sent one other person care packages (not the “tick lick” guy). I dragged my brother with me to Target and made him help me choose things for you. I put my thinking cap on to figure out how I could send you cheese that wasn’t perishable (there aren’t that many options) and then experimented a lot. I ruined a pound of the freeze-dried stuff before I got the measurements for the water to cheese ratio correct to rehydrate it. It isn’t the best tasting pizza in the world, and if you hate it, my feelings won’t be hurt. :)

I bought and sent you a few books yesterday. Only books, nothing else, don’t get too excited. Hope you don’t care about surprises. I don’t.

Me? Find a dark spot to pee in? Busted. I’m crying laughing. I made my friend keep an eye out for me while I did it. Now I need to text her and remind her about it so she can laugh too. Did someone you know tell you they had to do that? There’s nowhere to pee!

Worrying about how much you pee in a day is something I never even thought about. Do they give you bottles of water or do you reuse them?

You “don’t remember the titles.” Okay. Right. I pinky swear I won’t judge whatever your read. Hint, hint, hint.

I read Twilight right after it came out. I was 19. This is a judgment-free zone, remember? Have I read Ender’s Game? Is there a moon in the sky? I’m kidding. Yes, I did, and I enjoyed it a lot.

I know my mom loves me. You can’t be that overprotective if you didn’t love someone, and there’s no one more protective than my mom. If she could have given me everything I ever wanted, she would have. After my parents separated, we all stayed with her. My dad moved back to San Francisco. That’s where most of his family lives. He has a sister who lives here in Houston. The only reason my parents moved here (Texas) was because of my mom’s family. My dad hated living here. He says the humidity reminded him too much of the Philippines when he was a kid.

I still see my dad at least once a year. He comes down to visit, and I try to go see him sometimes in Cali. He got remarried a few years ago to a nice woman with three kids who are cool. My mom on the other hand… she’s been remarried three times since him. Husband #4 is five years older than me.

There’s one thousand two hundred and four beads/sequins on the dress I made her. Good guess.

My brother didn’t learn his lesson. On Christmas that year, he brought a pan of brownies. Pot brownies. Everyone except my little sister ended up high as a kite. It was probably the best Christmas I’ve ever had since I was a kid. It was a lot of fun even though my mom got really mad afterward.

Why weren’t your parents into pranking? Are they really serious? Not that there’s anything wrong with it, just curious.

No picture or video of running into the door, but it happened. Ben, husband #4, was on the floor laughing. My mom walked out of the kitchen. Luckily it was only them who saw it, otherwise it would take two lifetimes to live it down instead of one. My mom texted everyone to tell them what happened. That’s my family for you.

I just got home from a concert. I left my earplugs at home and don’t think my ears will ever be the same. I’m about to pass out. Hope you’re okay.

-Ruby

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 3, 2008 3:27 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: Strange stuff

Ruby,

I really do appreciate you sending me the box. I reread the message I sent and it didn’t sound half as appreciative as I wanted it to. Don’t know how you even thought to try dehydrated cheese, but it was genius. I already ate one pizza and have zero complaints. It was a little piece of home I needed after this crap week. I nuked everything in the microwave like your instructions said… Debating whether to stretch out what I got left or eat more tomorrow. I try not to save things just in case there isn’t another time, know what I mean? I’m looking forward to seeing what books you sent. Thanks. Really.

Ruby, I had just been kidding about peeing….

I’ve been through a patrol where we only had a canteen a day. We can get as much water as we want. I don’t take it for granted. They tell us to crush the water bottles when we’re done with them so that the company who does the bottling doesn’t try to reuse them.

I swear I don’t remember the titles of the books. If I see the covers, I’d recognize them. I’ll tell you if I see them.

Ender’s Game is one of those books I wish they’d make into a movie… but I bet it wouldn’t be as good as the book.

That’s good you still keep in touch with your dad, but I can’t get over your mom being remarried to someone a few years older than you. Is that weird? Do you care?

Your brother got all of you high?

Growing up, my parents were strict Baptists and both their parents… my grandparents… were… uptight. I don’t remember any of them ever laughing or smiling. My dad’s a good guy. I wouldn’t call my birth mom a good person though, but she was all right when I was real little. Nothing seemed… off… until I was in middle school and started spending time at my best friend’s place that I noticed how different things were. It isn’t a big deal now. My dad’s happy enough, and my birth mom… I don’t know if she’ll ever be happy, but that’s on her.

What concert did you go to? Did you have a good time? What do you do when you don’t work? I know you said you kill ducks for fun, but what else?

My ex e-mailed me. She wanted to let me know she added me as a reference on a job application. I don’t know why she would think that’s a good idea. Does she expect me to answer my imaginary phone or write back an e-mail telling someone to hire her? Would you ever ask an ex for a reference, or is that as stupid of a request as I think it is? My mind is blown, but maybe I’m that tired. You tell me.

You don’t have to answer my question ^^^ if you don’t want to. Sometimes I feel like I don’t understand women and never will. No offense… I don’t mean you.

-A

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 4, 2008 1:05 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: No

Aaron,

Your message was fine, and I’m relieved my cheese experiments weren’t in vain. :)I had my mom’s husband try some of it to give me a second opinion. Not that it says much because I’ve seen him eat food with mold on it after he scraped it off.

If you were anyone else and our conversations were any different, I would feel more embarrassed than I do right now, but I think we’re past that. I peed in public. I’ll own up to it.

Speaking of peeing… do you pee in the bottles? My brother told me when he was in Afghanistan and it was cold, that there was no way he was getting out of bed to go to the bathroom. He’d roll over and pee in one instead. Not that he learned that in the military or anything. He and my brother mastered that art on family road trips when my mom would refuse to stop to use the bathroom, unless she needed to go, to save time.

I agree. I’d love for them to make a movie, but I doubt it would be as good. (But the costumes!)

Lol! Each husband has gotten younger and better looking. My mom was twenty-eight when she had me, so get that into perspective. After my dad, husband #2 was three years younger than her. (My mom is ten years younger than my dad). They were together for two years. Husband #3 was ten years younger than her, and they stayed together 8 years. He was my favorite. Husband #4 has been around a year now. They work at the same company and met that way. The next thing I knew, she was bringing him over for Thanksgiving, and by Christmas, they were married.

My older sister isn’t a fan of how many times she’s been married, and she hates that the men have been so young. The rest of us though don’t really care. I don’t. My mom doesn’t look her age. If you look up cougar in the dictionary, they would have her name as an example in a sentence. Who am I to tell her not to snag some young guy if she can? I think for a long time, she was hurt because of splitting up with my dad and wanted to make a point, but she didn’t let it keep her down. Honestly, I think my dad still gets jealous over it. Maybe I shouldn’t pick favorites, but… go Mom, you know?

That was an info drop.

We were high out of our minds thanks to those brownies on Christmas, Aaron. I’m not exaggerating. Usually people have family get-togethers and you know there’s going to be leftovers that everyone has to take home, right? There weren’t any. NONE. If the grocery store would have been open, I’m sure we would have taken a taxi to go buy snacks. We laughed the entire night. I should’ve known something was up when my little sister was going to break her diet for once to get a piece and he didn’t let her. Part of me hopes he’ll do it again this year, but we’ll see. Maybe I can hint at it. Please don’t call the cops on us.

I understand the religious point. I have a friend who was raised with a cult-type religious family. She couldn’t wear skirts, tie up her hair, or watch television. She ended up running away when we were in high school. My mom was a pretty strict Catholic up until she and my dad got divorced. Then she decided the church wasn’t so important, lol. The only time she goes now is for family baptisms and maybe Easter. I am sorry to hear that your relationship with your birth mom isn’t the best.

How long have you and your best friend known each other?

I went to see my favorite band. They’re called The Cloud Collision. You probably haven’t heard of them. They’re indie rock with an even balance of screaming and amazing vocals. It’s kind of hard to explain. I’ve been a fan for a few years. Every time they play close by, I go watch them.

When I’m not killing ducks on television, reading or playing pranks on my family, I like to go to the movies. I used to be pretty big into cosplay (if you don’t know what that is, I can explain, but I don’t want to assume you don’t since you play video games), but my friends have kind of chilled out on going to conventions, and since I work so much, I don’t make costumes for fun like I used to. I like trying new things too. I was taking some kickboxing classes recently, and before that I did aikido for a while. I like going to festivals and museums too.

I hope I’m not crossing the line when I tell you your ex has lost it. What was she thinking trying to use you as a reference? If you two had gotten off on good terms, I would understand, but from the little you told me, that doesn’t seem like the case.

For the record, I’ve been a female for twenty-three years and I still don’t understand myself half the time. Good luck.

Hope you’re okay.

-Ruby

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 9, 2008 2:51 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: Yes

Ruby,

Sorry for the delay again. We had another blackout. It’s been a rough week.

I think we’re good to say we can talk about body… stuff at this point. :]

I’ve got peeing into water bottles mastered. I could teach a class on doing it without standing up. Winters in Afghanistan are no joke, your brother was right. You don’t roll out of your warm cot to pee outside there.

You and your costumes. Some of us watched The Dark Knight and I caught myself looking at what all the actors wore. I’m blaming you.

#4 is more than twenty years younger than your mom? Your dad has got to be jealous. I would. She must be a hell of a woman.

Good call on him not letting your sister have any. I bet they drug test her, right? I haven’t had special brownies since high school. If your brother brings some for Christmas, I’ll have to live through you. Record it. I wouldn’t call the cops on you.

Don’t apologize about my birth mom. She hasn’t been in my life for twenty years.

I have two best friends. The one I mentioned I’ve known since seventh grade, that’s about eighteen years. My other best friend, I met freshman year of high school.

I haven’t heard of The Cloud Collision, but I like the name.

I know what cosplay is. Which characters did you do? I’ve always wanted to go to one of the big conventions they have. Why did you start taking aikido classes? The only kind of festivals I’ve ever been to have been music ones… remember the stepping in crap accident… but I’ve only been to two, and one was in Germany. It was… wild.

I don’t know what my ex was on writing me that. She has other people she could ask… I don’t get it. You ever had any exes do stupid stuff like that? Say yes, I wouldn’t mind knowing someone else has had it worse than me sometimes. Every girl I’ve ever dated has been the devil. My best friend says I’m a magnet for the crazy ones and liars.

Hope you’re all right.

-Aaron

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 10, 2008 12:05 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: Hi

Aaron,

I’m sorry about the blackout. I hope it wasn’t someone you know again.

What’s your tent situation like? My brother told me once, and this was a years ago when everyone was in the Middle East, that a lot of reservists who were stationed where he was had to sleep outside because there wasn’t enough room. He’d complain about how bad the mosquitoes and the mice were. Yuck. I just picture them crawling all over you while you’re sleeping on the floor.

I’m stupidly pleased at you appreciating the wardrobe for Batman. I remember reading the designer had to make her own material for the suit. It’s dorky, but I think that is so mind-blowing. I like movies where I can enjoy those details.

My mom is a hell of a woman. I’ll send you a picture as long as you promise not to become my new stepdad. I like #4.

Lol! I’ll have my phone on me Thanksgiving Day just in case anything goes down worth recording. I’m sure it will. To answer your question about drug testing, yes, my little sister does get tested. She’s paranoid and only takes aspirin and basic antibiotics whenever she gets sick.

So are all three of you BFFs? What do they do?

I love cosplay. I’ve done a lot of costumes, but my favorites were during my Fifth Element phase. Have you seen it? I’ve always wanted to go to the big conventions too! I’ve only been to local ones. The only reason why I started taking aikido was because I was bored and this gym by my mom’s house was having a New Years’ deal. I got my older sister to do it with me, but she quit after a few months. I’ve never been into sports; if I see a ball anywhere close by, I’m going to turn around and walk the other way, but I like martial arts.

Aren’t those festivals in Germany insane and just packed with people? How long was your tour there?

How long were you and your ex together?

^^ You don’t have to answer that. As for you being a magnet for crazy girls and liars, I don’t want to say you only have yourself to blame, but you’re the one who decided to date them, right? :) I’m messing with you. Kind of. I’d think you were full of crap about the kind of women you attract, but my oldest brother is the same way. My older sister says he gets all the “batshit crazy” ones, and it’s true. He’s had his car keyed three times by three different women. My niece’s mom is the devil. He’s had stalkers. You guys either like the crazy or need a new radar.

It’s been a while since I shared a joke with you. Here you go:

What do you call fake spaghetti?

…an im-pasta.

You’re welcome.

Hope you’re okay.

-Ruby

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 10, 2008 12:25 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: I’m Sorry

Aaron,

I hope you’ll forgive me for not telling you the truth, but I can’t keep going with it. I feel so bad. I can’t handle the lies anymore.

I don’t have a boyfriend. I’ve never had a boyfriend. I made him up when we first started messaging each other because I was paranoid after the incident with the “tick lick” guy. Now that I’ve gotten to know you and like you, I know you aren’t anything like him. I’m sorry for not being upfront with you to begin with, but I hope you understand why I did it.

The repentant liar,

Ruby

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 12, 2008 12:07 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: RE: I’m sorry

I’ll write back everything else later, but I wanted to write you back about your fake boyfriend first.

I’m not pissed you did it. I get it. I thought something was up with how vague you were being talking about him. Most girls always bring up their boyfriend unless they’re… trying to get with someone else on the side. It’s no big deal if that’s the only thing you haven’t been honest about, but I’d be surprised if there was something else. You don’t seem like that kind of person.

But that is the only thing you’ve lied to me about, yeah?

I saw there had been a hurricane heading toward Texas a few days ago. You make it through all right?

-Aaron

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 12, 2008 4:05 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: So Sorry

Aaron,

I cross my heart that’s all I’ve lied to you about. I just couldn’t keep going with it.

I’m sorry. I’ve been making myself sick worrying about lying to you.

-Ruby

P.S. The worst of the hurricane didn’t hit us. We only got a little rain. The hurricane last year was the one that was a pain. That’s nice of you to ask.

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 14, 2008 1:32 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: RE: So Sorry

Ruby,

It’s all good. I get it. It isn’t like you told me anything else except you having a boyfriend and not living with him. :]

-Aaron

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 14, 2008 2:05 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: I’m Sorry Part 2

Aaron,

I thought of something else I didn’t tell you about. I still live with my mom and #4. That’s it. Everyone knows I do, it isn’t like I try to hide it, but I feel like a fraud not actually telling you that. Looking back on it, I never made it seem like I lived anywhere else but….

-Ruby

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 16, 2008 1:37 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: RE: I’m Sorry Part 2

Ruby,

That’s not you lying. What’s wrong with living with your parents?

-Aaron

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 17, 2008 1:02 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: So Sorry

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, but I know people who have told me it’s been time to move out since I was eighteen. But the rent is cheap (I pay the electricity and water bill), and I have my own room and another room I can work in. Plus, my mom still cooks dinner most nights. She doesn’t care I still live at home. I think she prefers it. I promise that’s all I haven’t been upfront about.

-Ruby

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 19, 2008 2:42 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: RE: I’m sorry

Ruby,

Time for you to move out? Why? I’d still live at home if it wouldn’t drive me crazy. Don’t listen to anybody else if you’re happy and like living there.

-Aaron

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 20, 2008 3:05 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: So Sorry

You’re right. My older brothers and my sister had all moved out by the time they were 18. My oldest brother and sister went to college in Austin, and Jonathan joined the marines. I decided to go to school here in Houston, so I never left. They’re all successful, and I know I shouldn’t compare myself to them, but I do, even knowing it’s dumb to do that. They all tell me I’d be an idiot to move out. I’m happy. For the most part. Usually. I don’t want it to seem like I’m complaining.

-Ruby

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 21, 2008 12:41 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: RE: I’m sorry

Living on your own is different than living with your family, Ruby. If you’re not happy… you should look into getting your own place, maybe with a friend. It’s your life.

-A

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 22, 2008 2:08 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: RE: RE: I’m sorry

It isn’t that I’m unhappy, I’m not. I am happy, but… sometimes it’d be nice to leave the house and not have my mom still treat me like I’m 16 when I’m not home by midnight (I’m exaggerating. She only calls if I’m not home by 2). I know she means well, but every once in a while it gets to me. They’re all overprotective. I’m grateful. I shouldn’t make it seem like it’s a burden.

Anyway, can we start over?

-Ruby

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 23, 2008 11:41 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: RE: RE: RE: I’m sorry

I’ll let it go, but all I’m saying is, it’s your life. Do what you want with it. If that’s living at home or not. My dad didn’t want me joining the army, but I did it anyway because I wanted to.

We can start over.

-A

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 23, 2008 11:51 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: Hi

Ruby,

I didn’t know the soldier who died, still sucks… leaves a knot in my chest because it could happen to anyone at any time.

The tent situation here isn’t too bad. There are twenty men in each. The best part is we have AC. It gets hot here… about 130 degrees during the summer. We’re in the desert, but in the winter it’s still warm during the day and gets cool at night. I’ve done deployments early on in the war without AC… it’s a blessing.

The mosquitoes are the worst. They’re smarter than the ones back home. We’ve had hours-long conversations about them here. We have mosquito nets, but they crawl under them to get inside. They know how to do it. The mice can get bad, but a lot of us try to be careful. Where there are mice, there are snakes, and I don’t care what anybody says, you don’t want a snake hanging around. I check my bed every night.

You are a dork, but it’s cute you notice things like costumes and get excited about them. I get what you mean, but for me it’s the other way around. I can’t enjoy war movies anymore. I criticize everything in them.

Scout’s honor, no matter how good-looking your mom is, I won’t try and steal her away from #4.

All three of us are friends. Max, the one I’ve known since high school, works at a refinery. Des, the one I’ve been friends with since middle school, is a firefighter.

I’ve seen The Fifth Element. Give me some credit. What costumes did you do? I had this thing for Mila in that orange outfit for the longest. What belt did you have in aikido?

Festivals in Germany are insane. I don’t have any pictures with me, but imagine a ton of people and then multiply it by three.

We were “together” two years, but we probably only spent maybe two months of that face to face… saying two months is a stretch too, I bet. I had a tour in Italy for a year, and before that she didn’t live anywhere near where I was. We met through a friend of a friend when she visited base. It wasn’t anything that serious, but….

I’m not going to say you’re right about me choosing to date them. :] I’ve only had my car keyed once when I was twenty and had a couple of exes who were borderline stalkers. I feel his pain.

…what did you mean by you’ve “never had a boyfriend”?

Hope you’re okay too.

-Aaron

P.S. Does this count as starting over? :] We can pretend I’ve always known the truth.

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 24, 2008 1:11 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: RE: Hi

Aaron,

Mosquitoes that know how to get under nets? Mice and snakes? How can I say this? No thank you? You would think, because of Sylvester, I’d be okay with mice, but that is a negative. Snakes? No way, Jose. I feel stupid, but I didn’t put two and two together and figure that it would get cold in the winter on that side of the world. You think “desert” and think “hot” and “dehydration,” not jacket weather.

I’m attaching a picture of my mom and #4 from our trip to Orlando a few months ago when I sent you the Disney postcard. Don’t make me regret it. ;)

Do your friends still live in Louisiana?

You’ll be happy to hear I did a Leeloo costume—that’s Mila’s character. I still have the wig and everything. I’ve also done Diva Plavalaguna, the opera singer. The makeup took a stupid amount of time to do, but it came out well. I only got my yellow belt in aikido.

Excuse me for saying it, but your ex seems dumb. She was fine with you being stationed in Italy but wasn’t okay with you being on deployment now? Sounds fishy. I’m really sorry that happened to you.

I’ll tell you some stories about my brother’s exes if you’re ever down and need a laugh. :)

“I’ve never had a boyfriend” means exactly that. I’ve never had a boyfriend.

Hope the mosquitoes aren’t getting you too bad.

-Ruby

P.S. I forgot you’d asked if I ever owned a Bedazzler, the answer is no. We were broke back then. She bought me glue and gems from the dollar store. Same thing. :)

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 25, 2008 3:17 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: RE: RE: Hi

Ruby,

I have one soldier who gets heat exhaustion really easily. I have to keep an eye on him and ask almost constantly if he’s drank enough water, otherwise he gets sick. It’s so hot it’s suffocating. When you’re sitting in an HMMWV, it’s almost like you’re sitting in a sauna all day. The mice can get into everything. About a month ago, one got into my bin and ate my ramen.

There’s no way that’s your mom you sent a picture of.

Both my friends still live in Shreveport. When I get leave, that’s who I go stay with. They come and visit as often as they can wherever I’m stationed, but usually I go visit them, and then we go somewhere.

How did you pull off the opera singer look? Was your entire body blue? You got any pictures of the Leeloo costume?

I never thought about how there wasn’t a big difference between being in Italy and here… that bothers me a lot more than I figured it would. She never really lied before, but I guess if she had, how would I know, huh? I’ll have to think about it. I was pissed off for so long after… I made myself stop. I’ve been pissed enough. I’m done with it.

You’ve never… ever… had a boyfriend?

The bugs aren’t the worst they’ve ever been, but they’re still bad enough.

What kind of dresses are you working on now? Wedding or ice-skating?

-Aaron

P.S. That’s not your mom.

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 26, 2008 12:38 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: Gross, Yes and Yessss

Aaron,

Do you have to stay on top of a lot of your soldiers? You’re a noncommissioned officer, aren’t you? If a mouse got into my bin, I would throw everything away. :) Can you set up traps to catch them?

That’s 100 percent my mom. She’s 51. I’m sending a picture of her and my dad when I was a kid. She hasn’t aged, has she?

That’s nice of your friends to go visit. Do you think you’ll ever end up back in Shreveport? I hope I’m not being rude asking, but why don’t you stay with your dad when you go?

A LOT of body paint was what it took to pull off the Diva costume, and a bodysuit that I had to special order and almost ruined twice. That was the most stressful design of my life. The material was a nightmare. I would rather make my sister a dozen one-hundred-hour dresses than ever make that costume again. I’ll attach a picture of the opera suit. It’s hanging in my closet. My best friend was really into makeup effects and helped me do it.

I feel like a jerk for bursting your bubble with your ex. I shouldn’t have said anything, but who knows what she might have lied to you over. People say “everything happens for a reason.” I’m not sure if that’s true, but it was probably for the best. Maybe. If a little distance is all that it takes to tear a relationship apart, that should tell you something. Anybody would be mad. There’s nothing wrong with that.

If you want to get technical, I’ve had one boyfriend… in elementary school. Damon White. We were together for all of a week.

I’m working on two dresses right now. One is a wedding dress for my aunt’s shop that she was having a lot of problems with, and she asked me to take over. The other thing I’m working on is for an eight-year-old who might win a gold medal in the future. I’ll attach pictures of them after the one of my parents. The ice-skating one is my favorite. I like doing those more than wedding dresses, but don’t tell anyone I said that. What do you think?

My dad is coming to visit tomorrow for a few days. I’m excited.

-Ruby

P.P.S. Promise that’s my mom.

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 28, 2008 12:15 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: More Lies

Ruby,

I am an NCO. Most of the men under me have their “stuff” together, but I still check on them all the time. If I failed to remind them about something, even if it’s something I would assume they wouldn’t forget, I’d never forgive myself. If I tried to throw anything else away other than the ramen packets they got into, the other soldiers would dig through the trash for it. I used some of the baby wipes you sent to clean everything up. It’s all good… least until I get sick.

Now you’re lying. There is no way the woman in that picture is 51. She looks like she’s in her thirties. She’s your sister, isn’t she?

We’ll go with nice to describe my friends. Heh.

It’s just easier to stay with Max. My dad turned my old room into a workout room.

That costume looks like it’s straight from the movie. Have you thought about going into costume design for movies? What else have you got?

You didn’t do anything wrong. Thanks for saying something. I’m over it all now for the most part, but… goddamn, Ruby. It was rough. I was so pissed after she e-mailed me… but you made a good point. I’ve been thinking about her a lot lately… not like that but in general… and there’s a million different times I can think back on now and realize how fishy the things she’d do and say were. Who she would be hanging out with… why she wouldn’t answer the phone when I called… Maybe I’m imagining it, but I’ve got this gut feeling. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t angry about it all over again. I hate feeling like a dumbass. I’ve been in enough shit relationships, you’d figured I’d know and be used to it by now.

Don’t think I haven’t noticed you being vague about your boyfriend situation. It only makes me more curious. Why haven’t you dated anyone? By the time I was 23, I’d had… a lot of girlfriends.

The wedding dress is all right if you’re into those giant princess dresses… are you? I like the skating dress a lot more. Does work ever slow down for you or do you always have something to work on?

^^You don’t have to answer that. It’s none of my business.

Hope you’re having fun with your dad.

-Aaron

P.S. Tell me the truth about that picture of your “mom.” You’re pulling my leg, right?

From: [email protected]mail.com

Date: November 29, 2008 2:22 a.m.

To: [email protected]mail.mil

Subject: Lies? Never (Not Anymore)

Aaron,

I’m picturing you as a momma bear with your soldiers, but if your nagging keeps them alive, they can deal with it. It’s a lot of responsibility, isn’t it? Have you thought about doing school and becoming an officer? Maybe you’ve already done school. I hate to generalize and assume.

Lol! No! I’ll attach a picture of my older sister. They’re almost identical, but you can tell my mom is the older one. I’ll give you that; they look like sisters. Cross my heart she’s in her early fifties. It’s all good genes, facial products, and she claims it’s helped that she’s never smoked anything in her life and doesn’t drink more than wine at dinner.

I might have believed you and your friends were good until you decided to use “nice.” You’re full of it, and it isn’t pizza you’re full of. You and your friends got into all kinds of mess when you were younger, didn’t you?

I’ve attached a couple more pictures of cosplay costumes I’ve done and still have. One is the female version of Ghost Rider and the other is Darth Maul. They’ve both been hanging in my closet for years. I think I might see about selling them online. I’ve done that for other costumes I’ve done and knew I’d never use again. There’s a lot more girls who like cosplaying than you would think…. There’s also a lot of parents with senses of humor who are willing to buy costumes for their kids.

I’m not creative enough to do costume design full time, plus… relying on big gigs to get paid is intimidating. What if I can’t find work consistently enough? Or what if I can’t come up with ideas? At the rate I’m going, I know that one day when I’m ready to move out, I can afford to have my own little place (with a roommate) and still eat with my jobs right now. It’s good enough for me.

No one likes to feel like a dumbass. Do you really think she cheated on you?

I should’ve known you’d keep bringing up the boyfriend thing. No, I have never ever, ever in my life been in a relationship with someone. I’ve gone on a few dates, but that’s all. I was into this guy for a long time. It wasn’t until recently that I decided I wanted to try and really date someone who wasn’t him.

How many girlfriends is a lot?

I’m always asking you questions that aren’t any of my business. But to answer your question, I do have enough work at all times to stay busy. I’m almost too busy. My aunt with the bridal shop used to make a lot of the dresses herself. Then she started getting “busier” (lazier) and would leave the more time-consuming things to me. The last year, she hasn’t been doing hardly anything and has me do the entire dress. My other aunt that manages the dry cleaning business is my main priority. It’s getting harder to balance both and do my side work.

My dad’s gone. He was only here for five days, but we had a good time. He stayed with my marine brother. We went to a few museums together, took a trip to this pier nearby, and went to the movies. I was waking up early to spend time with him since I don’t usually have things to do during the day, that’s when he was free since everyone else was at work or practice at that time. At night, he would spend time with everyone else. I promised to go to California to visit in a few months.

Hope you’re okay.

-Ruby

P.S. Yes it is my mom. Deal with it.

From: [email protected]mail.mil

Date: November 30, 2008 1:22 p.m.

To: [email protected]mail.com

Subject: Not Dealing With It

Ruby,

I would never want to be an officer. I already deal with enough political BS. Being commissioned increases the BS to levels I’m not willing to handle. Plus, half the officers I’ve met have been entitled pricks. Not all of them, but enough.

Your “mom” and your “sister” look like twins. What does your grandma look like? Do you look like them? I don’t mean that in a sketchy way. I won’t be sending you any “tick lick” pictures all of a sudden. Don’t worry.

Heh. Yeah, we did get into all kinds of… things when we were younger. The problem was not getting caught. We used to make napalm, mess with electrical stuff… Good times. Don’t know how I didn’t lose a finger at least thinking back on it now.

Your costumes are amazing. I don’t understand how you think you aren’t creative enough. I don’t know anyone that could do what you’ve made. Do you go all out with your makeup when you cosplay? My favorite was your Ghost Rider outfit.

You’re really talented. I’m not just saying it. Remember that.

I’m not the jealous type. I don’t know… maybe I didn’t pay enough attention to her. It wouldn’t be the first time an ex has told me that. I wouldn’t sit somewhere and expect her to go behind my back while we were together, but now? I wouldn’t be surprised. I should’ve expected it. She broke up with me out of the blue. I e-mailed her to ask if there was someone else right after… I was angry. She said that wasn’t it, that there wasn’t anybody else. I can’t talk myself into asking any of our mutual friends what she’s up to and if she’s with someone else. Should I?

Hold up… you were into someone for so long that you never wanted to date anyone else? Why wouldn’t they want to be with you? You seem like a great girl. Why would you wait for somebody anyway? How long did you like him? This all sort of blows my mind. I’ve never known anyone over the age of 18 who hasn’t been in a relationship, even if it was a bad one.

I don’t kiss and tell. Heh.

I’m kidding, I’ll tell you. Girls I’ve called my girlfriend since I was like 16? Around 20. I’ve lost count. Not more than 30.

Glad you got some quality time with your dad. California is pretty nice. When are you thinking about visiting?

Hope you’re doing all right.

-Aaron

P.S. I’m not dealing with it. That woman isn’t old enough to have a kid your age.