Chapter Nineteen

 

 

She opened her eyes wanting to talk to Declyn, but Cait was there with a needle sending her off to sleep again.

“How much longer does she have to stay under?”

“It’s up to her body she’s healing but I’d rather her stay asleep so that her body can heal without any undo stress. How are you holding up?”

“I’m fine. There haven’t been any reports of problems, not that I expected any.”

“No everything has been calm.” To calm if you ask me, she thought to herself before leaving.

Fire opened her eyes again intending to talk to Declyn and see Deja, but Cait put her back to sleep.

The next time she opened her eyes she caught Cait’s arm. “No more. Deja should have my back.” Her words were slurred as she tripped over her tongue.

“You need rest.”

“No more.”

“Alright, get some natural sleep.”

“Water.”

Declyn held her up and gave her tiny sips of water before lying her back down so she could fall asleep. She woke up feeling a little better.

“How long have I been out?”

“Eight weeks.”

“You’re not serious?”

“They took you apart like a jigsaw puzzle. Your intestines, stomach, bladder, even your heart were outside of your body. I’m serious.” His breath came out harsh while his eyes blazed wildly. His hands were clenched at his side.

She closed her eyes and concentrated on making sure her heartbeat slowed down. Seeing his anger, and his anguish was tearing her apart.

“I’m sorry Declyn I knew better, but I was on a self-destructive course.”

“You should have never gone to the store alone, but Deja should have never sent you. She’s as much to blame as you are.”

“She’s the last person to blame. She saved my life.”

“What are you talking about?” His head shook in denial

“When I was little my life wasn’t the best when it came to friends. Things were a lot better after Deja and I became friends, but some things were already in motion. I grew up with this stubborn streak a mile wide. Deja and I are different, I’ll talk to her tell her what she should and shouldn’t do. That never worked for me because I’m all about action. I would say let’s just get it done. With everything that happened, I was beginning to feel like my freedom was over. That I was stuck and I would never be able to have a normal life. On top of that, I was thinking about you and trying to figure out how I felt about you and how you felt about me.”

“I care about you. I want you, I desire you. I love you, but I know it’s too soon to tell you that.”

“I think I’m going to be one of those people who need to hear and see the love a lot. I don’t mean to be needy, I’ve just been alone a long time.”

“That won’t be a problem for me.”

“Deja could look at me and know I was about to do something foolish, and she was right. I was planning on running. I was coming back I just wanted to prove to myself that I had imagined everything that happened. Instead, she asked me to go to the store. When I was standing there, I realized how stupid I was being. I care about you. So what, it has only been a few days. I really don’t need months to make up my mind. That’s why I called you.

“I think if I had run I would be so focused on running that I would have never called. She saved my life. Although I’m mad because she hasn’t come to visit me, or did she come and I was too out of it to know she was here?”

“She’s not here.”

“I can see that. I want to see if I can sit up.”

“Not until Cait and Tristan look over you one more time.”

“I’m surprised she didn’t tell Cait to go easy on the drugs. They affect me more than they do most people. I couldn’t move.”

“That’s them at the door.”

“Come in,” she called out. She sniffed until she was sniffing herself. “I need a bath.”

She smiled at both of them as they walked in.

“Hi, thank you. You guys saved my life.”

“You’re welcome, you look so much better.” They came around her and began to do an exam.

“I want to get up and take a shower.”

“I think a bath would be better than standing in the shower.”

“As long as my body is in the water I’ll take it.”

“Let’s sit you up.” They slowly lifted her back until she was sitting. “How do you feel?”

“Slightly dizzy.”

“That’s to be expected. I don’t want you in the tub for a long time, and I don’t want you in the bathroom alone.”

“I’ll be with her.”

“Eat soft foods for a while.”

“Mmm Cream of Wheat and eggs.” She gave them a sunny smile before she waved.

“Bath?”

“I’ll go run the water.”

“I want to come.” He picked her up and carried her to the bathroom. “I missed the bathroom. Does that sound silly?”

“No.”

“I dreamed about you. I dreamed about loving you, mating with you. I even dreamed we had children together. I hated being drugged, but I loved being with you.”

He sat her down, she clutched his arm and brought him close enough to kiss. “When I feel just a little better I want you.”

“I want you.” His lips slid over hers remembering the softness of them and the way they curved fitting against him perfectly. He licked her until she opened up with a breathy sigh. She stroked his tongue sucking on it feeling her body respond to him. Her nipples hardened as she leaned in close to him.

Her breath caught in her throat as her heart started beating faster. “You need to calm down.” He kissed her one more time before he reluctantly pulled away. His gaze switched to the tub as she took deep breaths trying to calm down before he walked over and started running the water.

“I bought bubble baths and moisturizers for you.”

“I’ll take a little of the vanilla oil.”

He helped her take off her clothes then got her into the tub.

“Come here.” She took his hand, he knelt by the tub. “Tell me what your hiding.”

He lowered his eyes. “I was torn apart when I saw you. Torn apart isn’t deep enough I felt like someone stabbed me and I was dying.”

“I couldn’t look at anyone, I couldn’t talk to anyone. Enzo would have to step up because all I could think about was you. Your heart.” He stopped his hand was trembling. He tried to pull it back, but she held on tight.

“Your body cavity was opened exposed like you were a side of beef instead of the female I adored. I have never felt such anger and hatred. I wanted to kill. I know how to kill, quickly, efficiently. Who would know? Who would question? I am the Alpha I have the authority, but I never have and never will use my position like that. I just wanted to be left alone with my grief. I mourned you Alpia. No one knew if you would live or die. They smiled at me told me everything would be okay, but I have eyes and I know when my people are trying to protect me.”

“You hated Deja.” She said it with such confidence that he bowed his head.

“I hated her intensely. The very sight of her set off the urge within me to kill. She is my beta just like Enzo. I was wrong but try telling that to the beast that lives within me.”

“What happened?”

“Nothing I couldn’t tear myself away from you even though I knew I needed to talk to her. To try and find a way to forgive her.”

“She didn’t—.”

“I know now I didn’t know then.”

“We’ll ask them to come over when I’m…Why are you shaking your head no?”

“They can’t come over.”

“You’re going to have to get over this she is my best friend and would never hurt me.”

“I know that. I came to that realization a while ago.”

“Then why are you still upset with her?”

“I’m not.”

“What aren’t you telling me?”

He shook his head before he went to both knees and kissed the palm of her hand.

“I’d do anything for you, but I screwed this one up. She left Fire. She took Enzo and Ven with her. I’m sure they wanted to go with her. If she were my female, if she were you I would leave with you. There would be no way I would stay behind.”

Slow breath out, slow breath in. She gave him a small smile. “Explain to her like you explained to me I’m sure she’ll come back.”

“We’ve been looking, but we don’t know where they went to.”

“Don’t look, find. Understand?” Her eyes flashed, and her voice deepened.

“I understand Alpia. It will be done.”

She flashed a smile at him before her eyes drifted closed. He washed her quickly and took her out the tub.

 

*~*~*~*

 

“Did I fall asleep again?” She was cuddled up against him on the couch. They were waiting for Caden and Xander to come back with the truck that held their new bedroom furniture.

He had put off the delivery several times while she was fighting for her life and then he rescheduled it even after she was awake because he didn’t think she was ready for the stress. This time she forbade him to put it off one more time. She had been awake and doing much better for a month now. The only thing that was bothering her was that they had yet to find Deja.

She had Chase trace their cell phones, but they had destroyed them. Deja was much harder to locate than she would have thought.

The knock on the door perked her up and took her mind off her friend. She was ready to get started. The bedroom was empty, and the wood floors were beautiful

She got up and hurried to the door

“Slow down, you don’t want to hurt yourself.” She ignored him while rolling her eyes. She opened the door wide and grinned at both Caden and Xander as they stood there holding her headboard.

“I forgot how beautiful the headboard was.”

“Love, are you going to move so they can carry it in?”

She felt a blush take over her cheeks, but she tilted her head and moved back like she was a royal princess and ignored the fact that she was turning red.

They laughed at her as they carried it in. She made her way out the door and hurried to the truck. Declyn circled her waist from behind.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He said in her ear tickling her and making her body shiver with desire.

“I’m going to help bring the furniture in.”

“I like that plan. You go sit on the couch and watch as we bring the furniture in.” He smacked her behind before he turned her back to face the door.

She watched as they walked back and forth carrying pieces until they were all in the room.

“This is where I come in.” She walked into the room and started telling them where to place everything soon all the big pieces were together and placed perfectly. All she needed to do was the small stuff.

“Thank you.” She gave them each a smile of appreciation.

“You’re welcome Alpha.” They were in synch as they spoke. “We need to take the truck back so the delivery men can finish up their route.

Declyn had explained that the delivery men would never make it through the barrier, so they had developed a way to give the men a break as they took any deliveries for the compound.

She took her time putting sheets and covers on the bed as well as arranging pillows. They had a nice comfortable corner where they could read or simply sit and talk. She placed clothes in the dressers and pulled out items she bought earlier for the room, by the time she was finished it was beautiful.

“What do you think?” She never turned around, she could feel Declyn when he was close. The more time they spent together, the more her heart felt connected to his.

“I love it. You made this more than a bedroom. It feels like an intimate place for the both of us to gather.”

“It is.” She turned around her eyes were lit with desire as she smiled at him. She beckoned him to come forward. With one hand, she patted the bed.

He kicked off his shoes and bent down to take off his socks before he came and sat on the bed next to her.

“You were right this is the perfect mattress firm but covered in a layer of softness.”

“You need that in your life. You keep yourself battle ready, and I understand why, but you need softness in your life. We don’t know what will happen tomorrow, but we still have to live today.”

“How do you forgive me for scaring Deja away?”

“That’s easy I love you.”

“You do? We haven’t even…”

“I don’t need sex to know I love you. I can feel you deep inside of me, it’s like my heart is linked to yours.”

“Fire, I never know what to do around you.”

“Touch me Declyn.”