Chapter Seven
ONLY THE NEXT day, I couldn’t find Shelly or Adrian anywhere.
I knew better than to go to Philip’s office after what had happened there. Instead I wandered the hallways of his expansive house, peeking around corners so I wouldn’t find him.
There were actual wings as if this were the castle in Beauty and the Beast. In the part of the house where our guest rooms were, the halls were papered with faintly gleaming thick stripes, almost pearly, that went from the crown molding at the high ceiling to the floor.
As I explored deeper into the house, they changed to some kind of black leather padding, studded with buttons. I ran my fingertips along the leather, such a strange choice for a wall. It reminded me of Corduroy’s exploration in the department store, finding wonders he didn’t quite understand. He had pulled off a button and been discovered. I had no desire to be found; my hand fell away.
I reached the end of the hallway and slowed, ready to turn around.
The shadows at the far wall caught my eye, something not quite right about the way they lay across the padded-leather paneling. I kept walking, even when the plush white rug ended, leaving only hardwood floor.
When I got close, I could see there was a false wall extending part of the way into the hall. From far away it wasn’t obvious that anything else would be back here. Up close, I could easily turn the corner into a small nook—which contained only a metal spiral staircase.
I had thought the second floor was the top floor. What was above this? The roof?
The stairs shivered under my weight. I had no idea how Philip ever ascended them without them swaying like a tree in a storm. When I reached the top, I discovered I wasn’t on the roof. I wasn’t outdoors at all, not technically, but the glass windows surrounding the small enclosure made it feel like I was, the panes like facets of a diamond—a jewel from which to study the stars. There were pillows and impossibly soft throws strewn over the small nook. Did Shelly know about this place? I imagined she did. She seemed to know everything about Philip.
Even though the little observatory was beautiful, I felt like I was intruding on someone’s private space. I climbed back down the spiral steps—and ran into a large, wide body at the bottom.
It held me there, hands on the rails at my sides, locking me in. Philip. “What the fuck are you doing?”
My blood rushed through my ears, making my voice come out too loud. “Nothing.”
“Then why do I keep seeing you all over my house? First my office, now here. Are you a spy? Who sent you?”
“What? No!” Oh my God. Talk about paranoid. Then again, maybe it was warranted considering Shelly had been an informant for the police. “I was just…I was just curious.”
That wasn’t what I had meant to say. I couldn’t find Shelly. I was looking for the kitchen. I’m scared. There were a million things I would have said if I could have thought about it, but his presence, so close, so warm, so large, removed the ability to think. And once the words were out, I recognized the truth of them. I was curious about Philip Murphy—and that was a dangerous situation.
“Curious,” he said, sounding amused. It was too dark to see his face completely, and it gave him the impression of a god, watching me from above as I stumbled and fell far beneath him. “You know what they say about curiosity and the cat.”
Curiosity killed the cat—a dangerous situation for sure. “I’m not a cat,” I said hotly.
He ran a hand over my hair, a gentle caress. Petting me. “I don’t know,” he mused. “You have claws.”
“Trust me,” I said with as much confidence as I could muster. “If I had claws, you’d be bleeding by now.”
A silent laugh, more vibration than sound. “Maybe I am.”
“No.” I was the one bleeding. I was the broken one. “Don’t,” I said thickly.
“Don’t what?”
At least he didn’t say it with feigned innocence. He knew exactly what he was doing to me, but he wanted me to say it.
“Don’t act like you give a shit,” I said. No one gave a shit. Except for some reason Shelly did. My heart clenched.
“You’re in my house,” he countered. “That makes you my business. And I’ve been thinking about your…offer.”
My offer. Sex. That was what he meant. Suddenly my mouth went dry. His posture, blocking my exit, felt more sinister than before. He had refused me flatly, cruelly. And I’d been both hurt and relieved at the time, but I’d thought it was over. “You said you weren’t interested.”
“I thought about what you said. It’s only fair you pay your own debt. And I…” A hand cupped my waist and then slid down to my hip, burning a path—branding me. “I can’t deny I would enjoy it.”
My pulse raced, blood hot. “I doubt that. I don’t know anything.”
“I could teach you what you need to know.” A taut pause and then his voice was rougher. “I would love to teach you.”
Arousal bloomed between my legs, and I shuddered. “What about Shelly?” I whispered.
I felt his displeasure shimmer in the air around us. “She won’t like it.”
“Do you care?” I didn’t think he cared what anyone thought about him, didn’t think he would let anyone stop him.
“You’re too young,” he said instead of answering. Or maybe that was his answer. Shelly was protecting me because I was young—and somehow that had made me off limits even to a man like him.
Too young. I lifted my chin, defiant. “The men at the hotel didn’t think so.”
“And I’m just like them,” he said, half question.
He was nothing like them. They were small and mindless, rocks falling from a mountainside. Philip was his own freaking mountain. “You are,” I whispered because I wanted to hurt him, the same way he had hurt me when he rejected my naked, battered body.
It shouldn’t have bothered me when he did that. I should have only been glad.
And I shouldn’t have been able to move him at all, a small dandelion in his large shadow.
But he went stock-still, and somehow I knew I had gotten to him. A direct hit. He peeled his hands off the railing and walked away without another word. And I knew in that moment that I did have claws—I was glad of it. I needed some kind of defense against this dark world.
I had made him bleed. I’d won something tonight.
And lost something. I felt that too, just as sure.