They all must think I’m stupid, that I don’t notice the looks or the whispered conversations. They think I don't know. I know. I've known since the beginning; since he saved me, I've known. Looking out the door, I see him standing there staring at the water, his shoulders are rounded as he pulls in on himself. My heart broke a little as he drew Aislin into his arms holding her tight. I wonder what secrets she told him.

Yggdrasil contacted her, that much Emma told me, that much is what she knew. Whatever Aislin was told, she has locked it away. She has always been a vault, a person you could tell anything to. She would never judge and she would never reveal your secrets. Now she holds Yggdrasil’s.

The boys watch me closely, but I force a smile to reassure them before I turn and leave. I go to him, this man who has held my heart since long before I even knew what that meant. I have to admit not only to myself but to him that I’ve loved him my entire life. I will love him even in the next.

I want to curse fate and damn destiny. How dare they show me how life could have been like, what it should have been like, and then rip it all away? He hears my footsteps, I can tell by the way he straightens his shoulders. I hear him draw a deep breath as he tries to calm his emotions. I would be angry if I didn't understand his reasoning. How can I blame him when I'm doing the same thing? I laid on the beach pretending we had all the time in the world, avoiding reality. We ignored the world.

I know if I asked, he would take me from here, not the Isle, not Scotland, not Europe even. No, he would take me from this world. He's hinted at it, at all of us leaving, letting Odin have this place, and it’s a half-hearted offer, but if I asked. Oh, if I asked.

I don't stop until my breasts press into his back, sliding my arms around his waist and burying my nose in his shirt. I draw in the scent of him letting his warmth seep into me.

“Are you alright?” I murmur. His hand covers mine, and he presses them against his heart.

“No. He did this, and I have to face what must be done.” His sadness beats at me.

“I’m sorry. It shouldn’t be you.”

“It can be no other, and make no mistake, I’m not mourning him. Aislin pointed out that Yggdrasil was a mother to us all. We all will feel her absence for the rest of our lives.” He turns as he speaks, and I look up into his face, memorizing every detail.

“Can we talk?” I ask as I raise up on my tiptoes, drawing his head down for a kiss. It's a kiss that says all the things I want to say out loud. I slowly lower down and watch him through my eyelashes.

“Of course.” He takes my hand and turns, leading us farther from the house. We walk in silence until we are well out of range of any ears, even those of a certain cat and dog. Finally we stop on the other side of a lake. It shimmers in the light and reminds me of the surface of a bubble floating in the Sun, a constantly shifting glistening rainbow. “She made it like those from home.” His voice is equal parts pride and longing.

“You wanted to talk?” He doesn't look at me but continues to stare out at the water.

“There are things we should discuss, don't you think?” I glanced at him and then back out at the water before turning to face him. “Things that we should say.” Finally he looks down at me, questions filling his eyes. I decided right then that after everything, not only what's happened between us but also everything else, everything that's being demanded of him, everything that he has no control over because of all of those things, that he deserves to know.

I summon every ounce of courage, I push away every doubt, and I ignore every memory of every rejection. He stands silently watching and waiting.

I look down at the ground and draw deep breath before looking back up at his face and into a stormy eyes. I reach out and place my palm over his heart. Worry has crept into his eyes, and I smile to reassure him as I begin to speak. Here goes nothing. “I love you.” I want to cry at the surprised look on his face. What does that say about his life? Does he not believe that he's lovable? Has he ever been loved unconditionally and just for him, the man not the God? Have people always wanted something from him, used him? He says nothing, and for a moment, just an instant, I worry.

Between one blink of an eye and another, I am in his arms. He squeezes me, almost crushing me in his embrace. I feel a sense of desperation from us both. His face is buried in my neck, and I feel him draw in the scent of me before he moves his lips along my jaw. I cannot wait and I turn my head, my hungry lips seeking his. We kiss like it's our last or our first, drinking each other in until we're breathless, and even when we break apart, he doesn't leave my lips. Instead he continues to sip at them. “I have loved you for a thousand years; before I knew your face, I loved you. My love for you is eternal.”

Eternal. We might be crazy, and I'm sure somewhere, some therapist would say falling in love in the middle of all of this turmoil and craziness is insane, that it isn't real, but they would be wrong. I read a poem once by N. Hart, and it said ‘We went crazy for each other, fell in way too deep, loved too hard, and got lost in the debris, but tell me... Weren't we the most beautiful disaster you ever did see?’ That's us, and I remember when I read it, I thought to myself how amazing that would be and isn't it just.

“I know it's crazy what with everything going on but I don't want to waste our time.” I place my finger over his lips to stop the words that he's about to say. “We don't know what's going to happen. We don't know if we're going to win, and even if we do win, we don't know if we'll both make it.” I glanced towards the house and then back at him. “You all think I'm clueless, that I'm not paying attention. Do you think that I don't see how worried you are? I do. I know that you're hiding something and I can't force you to tell me but don't I deserve to know?”

I watch as the muscles in his jaw flex as he grits his teeth. I simply raise an eyebrow and wait. “It's not that I'm trying to hide it from you, exactly. But like you, I want to savor every moment that we have and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't trying to ignore what's coming. I'm trying to protect you and also not make our possibly limited time solely focused on what's to come.”

“I appreciate that, I do, but I need to know. By keeping your secret, you're keeping distance. Distance between us. I watch you pull away every time you think about it.” I fight to keep the hurt from my voice but if the look on his face is anything to go by, I failed miserably.

“I'm sorry. I'll explain, but it's not a short story, so let's sit under the tree.” The sadness of Yggdrasil’s loss swamps us for a moment as he leads me beneath the branches. “The short version is long ago, even before we came to be on our planet, there were others -- ancient beings so powerful they made us look like… well, human basically.” I smile and fight a laugh at the outrage in his voice from that thought. “They were dying, going extinct. There are only a few left. In their bid to live on, they chose our clan, thinking we, as the strongest, were best suited for their gift. They were wrong. It took many generations before we realized the insanity that eventually overtook us all was because of that gift. We, even as strong as we are, are not strong enough to wield the power. From the moment we are born, it calls to us. Whispers. It hungers and craves for absolute power and domination. Odin gave in to it long ago. I didn't realize it until recently but I don't think he ever actually fought it.”

I don't say anything, not for a very long time. I think about what he said about the power whispering constantly. Thousands of years of something eating away, not just at your resolve but at your soul. Thousands of years, he has fought. I know this to be true even without being told because she would have never chosen him if he'd given in. I blink slowly as the truth tears through me. I want to scream. I want to deny it. I want to run with him away from this unbearable revelation.

It’s what they're asking of him. To defeat Odin, he must welcome it; he must stop fighting. I cannot stop the flood of tears as my heart pounds. He watches, knowing I have figured out the secret. “Cora, Elskan min, my love, please don't cry. We still have time; we could still find another way.”

I nod, knowing he's lying. “What do those words mean? You promised to tell me,” I ask as I fight to stop the tears.

“It means ‘my love.’ ” He smiles and there on his face is the love I've always dreamed of.