Chapter Twenty
That night, as they unpacked dinner from the take-out bag in Taylor’s kitchen, Isabel turned to her. “Scruffy, and Lyle, Candace, and Scarlett are leaving Water.”
Taylor’s eyes were red, and though she hadn’t cried in front of Isabel, it still gutted her to know that the tears had come. “I talked to Scruffy. I told him he didn’t owe me his job.”
“Yeah, well, he doesn’t want to be there if you’re not. Turns out the angry little guy has a loyal heart.”
“I always suspected he might.”
“I’m leaving, too.”
Taylor paused midway through opening the lid on a container of wonton soup and set it down. “You are? Iz, you don’t have to—” Another long pause as she seemed to melt. “You are?”
“It doesn’t feel right without you there. I stayed late to talk with Scruffy, and he’s going to see what he can do about putting me in touch with some of his contacts.”
Taylor held up one hand silently as she walked from the kitchen to the living room. She was crying, Isabel realized, and she quickly followed her. “Tay, are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” she said, fanning her face as tears fell. “I didn’t expect everyone to…care so much. The fact that you’re willing to leave your job for me…I don’t even have the words.”
“Then don’t say anything.” Isabel squeezed her hand. “I’ll need to find a way to make money in the meantime, but staying on just didn’t feel right.”
“Hey,” Taylor said, “I don’t want you to worry about any of that. If you need help financially, I’m here. Plus, I have contacts of my own all over town. In fact,” she turned and headed back to the kitchen for her phone, “I have a friend over at ABC who needs a staff writer for that new show Postman. It’s getting a lot of attention. You’d be great actually.”
“That postapocalyptic show? I caught an episode once. That would be awesome.”
“Cindy is going to love you.” Taylor seemed happy, almost in project mode, and Isabel knew she’d made the right decision.
“And what about you?” Isabel asked and watched as Taylor’s exuberance dimmed. “What’s next in line for you?”
“I’m going to take some time out, I think. The Hollywood rat race is a little too much for me to deal with right now.” She eased a strand of hair behind her ear. “There’s still the lawsuit to handle. Brooks wants me to settle. Offer her half a million to drop the suit, though I’m thinking she’s already gotten what she wanted. She may just drop it herself. This was never about money. She has more than God.”
“I think that sounds like a solid plan.”
*****
The night was a quiet one, and for Taylor, it helped immensely having Isabel there, to sit with her and talk or not talk. The silences between them were the easy kind. They sat on the terrace with the outdoor heater going and stared out at the countless lights of Hollywood. All those people out there, living their lives, gearing up for the holidays.
“Have you ever thought of living anywhere other than California?” Isabel asked. “You’ve never really known anything else.”
“That’s true,” Taylor said, and then tapped into a pocket dream she sometimes carried around with her. “Occasionally, I imagine myself making pies in the country and going for nature walks. Not exactly practical for my type-A personality, but maybe that can be my retirement, you know?”
Isabel nodded and stared into the night. Her silhouette was every bit as beautiful as the rest of her. There were crickets chirping in the distance. Apparently, the impending California winter couldn’t keep them down.
“You might burn the pies,” Isabel said resolutely.
“What?” Taylor turned to her, jaw hanging open.
Isabel shrugged. “I’m just saying, maybe stick with pancakes. Remember when you burned the cookies you just slice from the tube?”
If there had been something close by to throw at Isabel, Taylor would have gladly scooped it up. “I just confessed to you a long-term dream of mine and you insult me? On the very day I was fired?” But she felt the corners of her mouth turn upward and understood how important that was. “I could turn out to be fantastic at baking pies. You don’t know.”
“Sadly, I do.” Isabel walked to Taylor’s chair and sat across her sideways, looping an arm around her neck. “I’m just looking out for you, boss lady. You have so many fantastic talents, despite the pie baking predisposition for failure.”
With Isabel so close and warm like a much-needed life preserver, Taylor drifted further away from the rest of the world and the awful circumstances she faced. She focused instead on the smiling face in front of hers and made sure to count Isabel as one of her biggest blessings.
“Why are you looking at me like that? You’re giving me the ‘soft eyes’ look. Not that I’m complaining. The ‘you left the cap off the toothpaste’ look is way worse, and trust me, I will not be repeating that little misstep in the future.”
Taylor rested a hand on Isabel’s thigh and looked into her eyes. “You’re my friend, you know that?”
“Okay.” Isabel paused. “I hope I’m more than that.” Her smile faltered as she glanced at the ground. It’s what she did when she was feeling less than sure.
“No. Of course you are. I just mean that in addition to being sexy and smart and funny and the woman whose clothes I constantly fantasize about removing, you’re also my honest-to-goodness friend. You’ve beyond proven that today.”
“I am your friend. For always.” Isabel touched her cheek gently and they stared at each other for a quiet moment before Isabel leaned down and kissed her, gently at first and then with purpose. “Remember when we used to fight this?” she asked.
Taylor nodded sincerely. “We never stood a chance. Can you stay tonight?”
“Oh, my God. I thought you’d never ask.”
*****
“I’m on my third croissant. You guys need to call the cops,” Hadley said, as if her little heart had been smashed in. Isabel decided that when Hadley pouted, it was universally gut-wrenching. A rare talent.
“Not illegal,” Autumn pointed with her mug from her spot across the table. It was Monday morning and the breakfast club was in full session.
“I’m going to be run out of Beverly Hills fashion if I can’t make the boutique’s clothes look good. ‘You had one job this morning, Hadley,’” she said, in a terrifying voice Isabel didn’t even know she was capable of. “‘Avoid the flaky pastry.’”
“What the hell was that?” Isabel asked. “You sounded like Cookie Monster on steroids.”
“It’s how she talks to herself,” Gia said, resting her chin on her folded arms. “It’s the freakiest thing. I’d explain it, but, you know, there’s no explaining it.”
Hadley waved them off and turned to Autumn. “It’s your fault. You’ve enabled me, and now look who I’m turning into.” She held up half a croissant as evidence.
“I’ve done no such thing,” Autumn said, with nonchalance. “I’m a smart businesswoman and know how to hook a client when I need to.”
“So do the crack dealers on the corner,” Isabel offered and accepted Hadley’s fist bump. She turned to Autumn. “But your coffee’s better than crack.”
“Put that on the sign out front,” Gia said. “Do it.”
“Done. The Cat’s Pajamas: Better Than Crack.” Autumn and Gia exchanged a fist bump of their own.
“Any updates to Taylor’s situation?” Hadley asked Isabel. “It’s like something out of a soap opera, which is, well, ironic.”
Isabel sat back in her chair, cradling her warm mug between both hands. “On Friday, they fired her. Full-on.”
“No fucking way,” Gia said. “Because of that actress’s lawsuit?”
Isabel nodded. “I’m guessing they didn’t see any way for them to work together after all this, and Aspen is the center of the Water universe, so…”
Autumn shook her head. “Taylor pays the price. Unbelievable.”
“Well, that does it. I’m taking down my life-size cutout,” Hadley said emphatically.
Isabel covered Hadley’s hand. “I’m sorry, Had. I wish she were a nicer person. Also, I’m resigning today.”
Three mouths fell open and began talking at once.
“What?”
“Wow.”
“For Taylor?”
Isabel nodded. “Yes, for Taylor. I’m not going to lie, it was terrifying to imagine myself quitting the best job I’ve ever had, but Taylor has a lead on another writing gig for me, as does another coworker of mine, and it just feels that standing solidly with her when her dismissal was so unfair is the right thing to do. I’ll be okay.”
“Noble of you,” Gia said. “It’s definitely the right move.”
Hadley and Autumn nodded.
“You’ll land on your feet,” Autumn said, and without looking, pointed to the cat logo on the wall behind her.
Isabel grinned. “I see what you did there.” She stood and downed the last of her coffee. “I’m off. Thanks, you guys. It helps to know you’re in my corner, or whatever.” She felt the blush that hit out of embarrassment. She’d never had friends like these before, and the well of emotion was foreign to her.
“We love you, Iz,” Hadley said squeezing her hand. “Come over later and let me know how it goes.”
“You’re on.”
An hour later, when Isabel arrived at the studio, she hadn’t been at her desk five minutes before Gerald Hagerman rounded the corner and headed straight for her on some sort of mission. She stared up at him nervously.
“Morning, Isabel. I was hoping we could, uh, have a conversation.”
She closed her eyes briefly. So, he’d heard about her intentions to follow the others out the door and was probably not thrilled about it. She geared up to explain herself and let him know how unfair the whole thing was. “I’d be happy to chat.”
“Why don’t we head into the office?”
She followed him around the corner and down the short hallway to the office, Taylor’s office. Her belongings had been packed up and the place had been virtually gutted, leaving just the desk and a bookshelf in the corner. The lifeless room made Isabel feel sick, as she flashed to the day she’d spilled coffee on that very desk.
Gerald closed the door and took a seat in Taylor’s chair. “I know you’re unhappy. I can see it all over your face.” He rested his big hands on his stomach.
“I don’t like the way all of this has played out. Taylor is the one who brought me on.”
“She’s a dynamo at spotting talent, which is why I’m here. We’re taking a look at options for Water moving forward.”
“Speaking of the future, I need to let you know—”
“Hang on.” He raised his hand to hold her off. “Hear me out first. I want you to take the show.”
She stared at him. “Take it where?” He wasn’t making sense.
“I realize you’re green and that you’ve never so much as produced before, but that’s why we bring in someone who can guide you through those processes until you’re fully ready to fly solo. In the meantime, these folks around here need a familiar face at the helm, and I need your creative storytelling in that writers’ room. So whaddaya say?”
“You want to make me showrunner?” She glanced around the room to try and make sense of what was happening.
“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”
She opened her mouth to answer but then closed it again, shocked at this new turn of events. “Just like that?”
“Ms. Chase, I’m a man who enjoys betting on the ponies, and I do well out there. I do. I could hand this show to Kathleen, but I’m not convinced she’s the most dynamic choice. Are you following me?”
“I think you just said I’m the pony you’re laying your money on.”
He smiled and regarded her like he was about to collect from the house.
*****
Taylor had spent most of the day watching Judge Judy with Raisin in her lap. She’d shelved the sweatpants and put on real people clothes, which was a step in the right direction. She missed work. She missed her staff and had all but turned off her phone, as Variety wouldn’t stop calling for a comment regarding her dismissal. November was turning into a cold and rainy month, which was the perfect backdrop for her present situation: pathetic.
“She should never have lent her boyfriend the car,” she told Raisin and pointed at the screen. “He owes her that three hundred fifty outright. Judy’ll put him in his place.”
At the sound of the doorbell she smiled, still not quite sure why she hadn’t given Isabel a key. Weren’t they getting close to that phase of their relationship? She scooped up the Champagne she’d had chilling and carried it with her to the door. She swung it open and presented the bottle. “For you. Welcome to the world of unemployment. We’re so glad you’re here.” She leaned in for a kiss but Isabel walked past her, head down.
“It was a weird day,” she said finally.
“Transitions usually are. I’m sorry. Let’s have a glass of Champagne and try to look forward and not back.”
“You’re not going to like what I have to say,” Isabel said slowly, “and I’ve spent the last few hours preparing myself for that.” Isabel moved rapidly around the room and didn’t quite seem to know what to do with her hands. “In fact, you may just kick me out of your house.”
Taylor went still. “What is it? Just say it, Iz. It can’t be that bad.”
“They picked a new showrunner for Water.”
Taylor took a seat, sobering. “Well, I’m not going to blame you for that.” But she didn’t like the idea of someone stepping into her shoes, taking over what was hers. In fact, the concept made her stomach fill with ice. To lose control of that world, her characters, was devastating. “Who’d they get?” She’d made a list of probable candidates days ago.
“That’s the interesting part. They offered it to me.”
Taylor’s head swiveled and she played the sentence back. “They did? Wow.”
“I know. I was just as floored.”
“I can only imagine. It’s a huge compliment, though, when you think about it.”
“I guess so.”
“What did they say when you told them you were leaving? I bet that threw them.” Taylor shook her head, just imagining the whiplash of that conversation.
“Right. That’s the thing.” She met Taylor’s gaze. “I took the job.”
The walls seemed to inch in on Taylor. “I’m not following you.”
Isabel met her gaze evenly. “I’m the new showrunner on Water.”
Taylor felt like she’d been punched in the gut. Hard. “Oh. You are?”
Isabel’s eyes flashed apologetic, like poor little Taylor might break in half at any moment. She didn’t want Isabel’s pity. In fact, she couldn’t stand it.
“The opportunity was too huge to pass up,” Isabel explained. “It’s the reason I came to LA, only I thought it would take years, but then this morning, there it was, handed to me.”
“There it was,” Taylor said blankly. Her mind splintered and she struggled to keep up with the emotions that came in ever-shifting waves. Just as she settled on one, a new one took over. Shock first. Then a slash of pain. Betrayal descended. Understanding. Betrayal again. Understanding. Too many things at once. She closed her eyes.
“The network sees something worthy in what I’ve done so far, and they want to work with me and develop my skills on the producing end. They’re going to pair me with—”
“Emma Wade,” they both said in unison.
“Right. Emma. To work with me as a mentor. You know Emma?”
“I know Emma.” They stared at each other, Taylor doing her best not to react until she was sure what that reaction should be. The tension hovered thick and uncomfortable. It was awful enough imagining the series moving on without her, but to see Isabel so easily discard her plans to stand with Taylor and to take the reins herself was…a bitter pill to swallow. Scruffy, Lyle, Scarlett, and Candace had all walked from the show for her. Yet Isabel had done the proverbial opposite and taken the network’s hand. At the same time, she understood Isabel’s perspective. She was new to all this. Hungry. Ambitious. And this was the opportunity of all opportunities.
Isabel stepped forward, but there was a chasm between them now that had nothing to do with their proximity. “I had to weigh it all, Tay: my hopes and dreams coming to fruition in one moment against the fact that you would hate me, probably never speak to me again.”
“You thought I would hate you?” Something clicked and the knife twisted. “You thought that taking the job meant you and I would be through.”
Isabel blinked back at her.
“Yet you did it anyway.”
“Trust me when I say that it was the most difficult decision I’ve ever made.”
“Nobody was asking you to choose, Isabel. I would never have made you choose. Don’t you get that?” Taylor stood there, letting the implication sink in fully. She shook her head. “But it’s apparent what your choice would have been. God. I get it now. As awful as it is, I understand who I’m dealing with.”
Panic flared in Isabel’s eyes. “Don’t get me wrong. I was hoping more than anything that you would understand, that we’d be okay.”
“But that was just a side note, right? An afterthought to your larger goal.” Taylor nodded a few times as she worked through the larger implication. To Isabel, she was disposable, and that realization leveled her like a two-by-four to the chest. She hadn’t imagined it. She couldn’t have predicted it. And she certainly couldn’t continue with that knowledge. How could she possibly?
Silence enveloped them as those unspoken words reverberated loudly. Raisin, realizing for the first time that Isabel had arrived, ran in from the laundry room and leapt up at her repeatedly.
Isabel’s voice was quiet and thin when she finally spoke. “What if I had turned it down and we didn’t work out? I couldn’t erase that thought from my head. What if we woke up tomorrow and you were bored, or you met someone more beautiful, more alluring, more everything than I am, because I would fully expect that to eventually happen.” She held her arms out and let them drop. “I’m just me, Taylor. Boring, unexciting me. There had to be a time limit.”
And the hits kept coming.
“If that’s the kind of person you think I am, then you were right. This probably wouldn’t have worked out. My need for exciting, glamorous, vapid women is never-ending! How could someone like me possibly maintain a healthy, normal relationship? Impossible! Do you understand how that sounds? How that makes me feel?” She was yelling now, and she never yelled.
“That’s not what I’m saying,” Isabel bit out, her own frustration apparent as she gestured wildly. “But I feel like I’m constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop with you. Sitting in my closet, anxiety ridden, because I can’t quite imagine that any of this is real. That you’re mine.”
“Was yours,” Taylor amended with distinction. “You chose the job, remember? Since I’m so shallow in my ways and would never have understood.”
Isabel’s eyes flashed. “You would have done the same.”
“No. I wouldn’t have. But that part doesn’t matter.”
“Taylor.” Isabel held out her hand, her eyes pleading. “Don’t hate me for this.”
“You should go now.”
“Wait. We’re not done here.”
“I think we have to be. Besides, it was your call. Not mine.”
Taylor walked slowly to the stairs, and once she was safely in her bedroom, she covered her eyes and let it all come. Distantly, she heard the front door click closed downstairs and covered her mouth, only to release a silent sob that racked her body. She sat on her bed slowly as the sorrow hit.
She’d lost everything that mattered.
Everything.
But then again, maybe she’d never really had it to begin with.