The party was in full swing, and as promised, the bar looked very impressive. I sipped on a Coke and lingered beside Alex. It wasn’t unpleasant, but it wasn’t particularly entertaining, either. Alex had been greeted by no less than fifty people and kept trying to introduce me to them. I knew it was all part of the act, but it was awkward meeting and trying to impress these people I knew I would never see again. I could only recall a handful of names, and that was mostly because the names I could recall had familiar Latin roots.

Cascade sauntered over, a red, fruity drink held in one hand. “Nick, we need to talk,” she said, grabbing my arm with her free hand.

“I’m being kidnapped,” I told Alex. “Help me.”

“Not again,” Alex joked. “First, that time with the elfin warlord. Now it’s a siren. I think I’ll just let her have you. As mouthy as you are, I’m sure she’ll bring you right back.”

“You complete ass.”

I rolled my eyes and let Cascade pull me away. “Guess what?” she asked, as she pulled me behind a column.

“What?”

“She does like women,” Cascade replied. “This is great. If this alpha thing doesn’t ruin everything, I’m going to ask her out.”

“Well. It might not be a problem if Alex doesn’t like me. I…I think he does. No, I know he does. I’m just not sure if it’s the same way I like him. But if he doesn’t, there shouldn’t be much of a problem with Zara and you.”

Cascade’s face softened. “I’m sorry. I’ll hang out with you for a bit. I really wasn’t thinking when I ran off.”

“No, it’s fine. I want you to have fun. I just…I feel like I’m not dealing very well with this. Maybe I’m a bit worried, too. About having my heart broken again. And that’s so selfish of me. Alex isn’t obligated to like me. He didn’t have that intention when he…”

“But you like him,” Cascade said. “I get it. You don’t need to be ashamed of how you feel. It’ll work out. I promise.”

“So what’s Zara like?” I asked, desperate to avoid talking about my own feelings. “I’ve only spoken to her twice, and she seemed kind of reserved both times. I suppose that’s to be expected, though, considering how huge this alpha thing is.”

“We talked a bit about everything. She seemed sincerely interested in my make-up venture, so we talked some about that. Then about literature. She’s a huge Austen fan, which I’ve never really liked, but at least she’s well read. I wonder if she’d read Clarissa for me. I’d really like to discuss it with someone besides a professor.”

Cascade had once tried to persuade me to read her eleven-volume edition of Samuel Richardson’s Clarissa, and I’d given it my best effort. I’d read through an entire volume before deciding that I’d rather burn my own eyes out than finish it, and at the point where I’d made that decision, there wasn’t any point in continuing.

“That’s cool,” I said.

I hated Clarissa so much.

“And she likes to crochet,” Cascade continued. “She makes hats and scarves for protestors. And for, like, pride parades and things. She’s very politically active, and I really like that about her.”

“If she’s working on a degree in biomedical sciences, I wonder where she finds the time,” I said.

Everyone insisted that a biomedical science degree was the hardest to earn. I wasn’t entirely certain of the validity of such claims, but I didn’t dispute that it must be a very difficult degree. I’d seen more than my fair share of frazzled biomed students and had nothing but sympathy for them. Eventually, the pay-off would doubtless be worth it, but it sure seemed like an uphill battle to get there.

“I didn’t tell her I like women, though,” Cascade said, lowering her voice. “I think I’ll wait and see how this goes down.”

The music stopped. I turned and peeked around the column. A group of people had gathered on stage. I sucked in a deep breath. This was it. The crowd was too thick for me to wedge myself closer. I couldn’t find Alex. He wasn’t standing where I’d left him. I lingered with Cascade at the edge of it all.

“Good evening, all,” a woman on stage said. “Welcome to our yearly Mardi Gras ball. While all our balls are always special, this one is especially so. We are here to name the future alpha. This isn’t a decision we made lightly, and it was one that took much of our time. Choosing the alpha is an ancient tradition, one that has lasted since the first werewolves formed packs. It is, therefore, our sacred duty to choose the alpha we feel will be the most beneficial to developing the pack.”

She paused, seemingly for dramatic effect, before continuing, “We, the council, wish to thank each and every one of you who have decided to join us for this momentous occasion. Some of you have traveled incredible distances to be with us tonight. Some of you have been part of this pack for many years. Some of you are friends, both old and new. Thank you all.”

For a horrifying moment, I thought she might literally name every single person in attendance.

“An alpha must be many things: strong, brave, intelligent, wise, and compassionate. A strong alpha knows how to manage him or herself as well as how to manage others. Tonight, we carry on this sacred tradition.”

She paused again, and a confused smattering of applause erupted. I glanced at Cascade, who shrugged. “I don’t think she gives speeches much,” Cascade muttered.

“Well, I detest people who drag out important events for suspense, so without further ado, I’d like to introduce you all to your new alpha—the first woman—”

Oh, no. This was…not what Alex had wanted. I couldn’t think much beyond that. Zara would be the new alpha.

“—to ever lead this pack. Zara Duchannes, it’s you! Come on up!”

Time seemed to stand still around me. Cacophonous applause bounced off the walls. I felt numb. Part of me felt like I ought to find Alex immediately and comfort him, but at the same time, I didn't know if he would want that. After all, didn’t we become friends because he wanted to earn this? Now he’d lost it. How could I possibly say anything that would make that okay? Cascade put her hand on my shoulder.

“What do you think I should do?” I asked.

Cascade was silent. All the people around me were still clapping. It all seemed very surreal, like another Nick and another Cascade were watching these people. I tried to peer around them looking for Alex, but he was nowhere in sight. Half the men at this party were wearing navy suits.

Should I leave? I was probably the last person he wanted to see after this, but I didn’t feel right just abandoning him here in front of all these people cheering for his competitor. I had to try to find him, at any rate. I looked around again, trying to glimpse Alex, but there was no trace of him anywhere I looked. I wondered if he'd left—just wandered out the back door when no one was looking. Surely he wouldn't do that, would he? But before I could find Alex, Ben found me.

“Hey! Nick!” he shouted above the crowd, waving an arm at me.

I struggled to make my way towards him. I was only vaguely aware of Cascade following in my wake. Somewhere along the way, I lost her. That was unfortunate. When I reached Ben, I wanted Cascade with me more than anyone else. Skye stood next to Ben in a bright pink dress, and beside her stood Alex, his arms crossed and his brow furrowed. I halted a few feet away, uncertain how to approach him. Finally, I cleared my throat. I felt like they were all looking at me, expecting me to swoop in and say something to make the situation better. And why shouldn’t they be? I was supposed to be his boyfriend. More than anyone, I should be the one going to him and offering words of encouragement, but anything I might have said fell away as quickly as I thought of it. “I’m sorry,” I said finally. “I can only imagine how disappointed you must feel.”

Alex sighed. “Yeah, well, I guess this is how it works out,” he said. “Don’t bother apologizing. It doesn’t make anything any better.”

“I know,” I replied, “But doesn’t it help just a little?”

“No, it really doesn’t. I’m going to be hearing apologies all freakin’ night, and God, I’m going to have to call my dad about this.”

“He isn’t here?” I asked.

Alex glared at me. I gulped, unsure what I’d done to deserve that.

“It’s a long story,” Ben said. “He couldn’t come because Alex’s stepmom is sick. But look, Alex, they’re not going to be mad. I mean, you lost to Zara. It’s not like you lost to a total moron!”

“You’re not helping!” Alex snapped.

“Okay, but Alex—” I began.

“Nothing you say can make this better,” Alex said.

“Maybe not,” I replied, feeling my face warm. “But I’m still going to try because that’s the nice thing to do!”

“Well, go be nice somewhere else! I’m sure there are lots of people who would love to hear you say nice, sentimental stuff to them! If the astrophysics thing doesn’t work out, you’ll have a promising future writing Hallmark cards!”

I took a deep, steadying breath. How dare he act like I was somehow to blame for this? So many things rushed through my mind. So many things that I wanted so badly to say to his smug, arrogant face. I could be awful, too.

Deep breaths. That wouldn’t help the situation, and I’d only feel guilty about it later. Alex was just upset, and he didn’t mean most—if any—of what he was saying.

I could save all the insults. I would save them. I was twenty-one years old and I was going to act like the adult I was.

“Hey, now,” Ben said. “Don't take it out on your boyfriend! Just because you’re mad isn’t any reason to be an ass!”

Alex pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’ll take it out on him if I want to! He's not even my boyfriend,” he said. “It was…”

Alex trailed off, but the damage was already done. Well, fuck. It was out. I was even more lost than I had been before. I sucked in another deep breath, as if extra oxygen could somehow make the world into a place where Alex had won and this entire argument was nonexistent. Ben looked between the two of us, searching for an answer. He didn’t look angry, just baffled. Was it too late to claim it’d been a joke? All of it?

“What do you mean he’s not really your boyfriend?” Skye asked.

Skye was harder to read. Her face was frightening in its impassivity. Whether she was thrilled or murderous was impossible to discern, but I dearly hoped it was closer to the former. Then, the realization struck me. These people mattered to Alex. They were his packmates, his family and friends. They’d grown up with him and supported him. They ran and played in the woods together as wolves. Alex must care so deeply for these people, and I would probably never see them again. I had no stake in this. It didn’t matter if every single one of them hated or distrusted me.

“It was my fault,” I said, despite having no idea how that could be. If anyone asked, I would’ve been at a loss. I was still determined to help Alex save face. Though some small part of me insisted that he had this coming to him—he must have known this outlandish scheme would eventually blow up in his face—how could I say such cruel things in the face of his defeat? This was salvageable for him if I just took the fall.

“Hey!” Cascade said, storming up to my side. “Don’t you pin all this on him! What did you expect? Your idea was right out of an Adam Sandler romcom! You had to realize that you’d eventually get found out! You’re just upset because it happened too soon for you!”

“But I—” Cascade cut Alex off with a sweep of her hand.

“Cascade, please. Don’t,” I said, before she could argue any further. “You don’t need to get involved in this.”

I’d almost figured it out, and besides, Alex was just upset. He didn’t deserve Cascade’s fury.

“Nick, I don’t care if he’s mad! That’s completely irrelevant! He has no right to lash out at you. So he wasn’t chosen? Big deal! It’s not the end of the world. Sometimes, you don’t get things you really want, and you just have to move on with your life. If Zara really is as great as everyone says, she’ll do fine. The pack will be fine. All this means is that Alex has to find something else to do with his life,” Cascade said. “He’s twenty-two! That’s plenty of time to figure it out!”

“Wait. What on Earth is this mess?” Ben asked. “He’s not dating Nick? It was just…a show? He doesn’t actually like you, Nick? But you both worked so well together!”

Meanwhile, Alex stared at Cascade like she'd grown a second head. “You have no idea what this means to me!” Alex snapped. “Maybe you shouldn't get involved in things that don't concern you.”

“Well, if it concerns Nick,” Cascade said. “It concerns me. He’s my best friend—in case you’ve forgotten that.”

“Guys,” Skye said. “Maybe you don't want to argue about this in the middle of the ballroom in front of everyone.”

We all looked around a bit sheepishly to see if anyone was watching. No one seemed to have noticed anything, but I wasn’t sure if they hadn’t heard or if they were tactfully pretending not to have listened in.

“We are going home,” Cascade said. “Come on, Nick.”

For a brief moment, I wanted Alex to tell her no. I wanted him to tell me to stay. He didn’t even need to apologize. I just wanted him to simmer down enough to tell me that he had actually liked me. But he didn’t.

Cascade took my arm. Numbly, I followed her. We were silent as we walked through the crowd. The music had resumed, and everyone seemed oblivious to the drama that had just occurred. This still left Alex to sort everything out with his packmates, but maybe it wouldn’t all devolve into some terrible disaster. I remained quiet even as we left the building and waited for the valet to return with Cascade’s Mustang. He pulled up to the curb as if he were James Bond.

I took the driver’s seat. Cascade piled in with her tulle and lace. At some point between leaving the hotel and stepping into the car, she’d pulled her glittery silver heels off. She stowed them on the passenger floor, where they were quickly lost in a sea of fabric. Though the car was already running, I sat there in silence for a few seconds before starting to drive.

“I’m sorry it worked out this way,” Cascade said. “I should have discouraged you from doing this. I just thought it might be fun for you. I…I have no excuse. I'm so sorry, Nick.”

“No,” I said. “This is on Alex and me. I agreed to this. It isn’t like anyone held me at knifepoint and forced me into pretending to be his boyfriend.”

“But still—”

“Cascade, it hurts, but it’s my fault for getting so invested in him in the first place. I knew he wasn’t looking for a relationship, and I shouldn’t have tempted fate by trying to get into one with him. I’m only sad because it didn’t go the way I wanted it to. I guess Alex and I have that in common now. He’s not alpha and I still don’t have a boyfriend. At least I didn't waste four years of my life on him like I did with Brian, right?”

I glanced at her quickly, seeking her approval. She smiled, although it looked forced.

“I’m right back where I started,” I said. “I just took a little detour from the status quo. That’s all.”

“I guess,” she said. “I just really wish it had turned out better for you. I mean, the way you talked about him was just so wonderful. I really did think there was a chance you two would have something.”

“I know,” I said. “I did, too. It just didn’t work out the way I wanted. It’s okay. Really. I’ll be fine. It’ll take some time, but I’m going to be okay.”

“I know you are,” Cascade said.

I didn’t think I could stand any more awkward silences, so I was determined to keep her talking. “You know, it was fun at least. Until this all blew up,” I offered.

“Yeah,” Cascade said. “I just wish it hadn’t happened that way. Are you going to try to talk to Alex?”

“Why? I doubt he wants anything to do with me after this. I mean, he's stubborn. If he does cool down and decide he wants to talk, he'll tell me. I mean, he's not very subtle. You know that.”

I wanted so badly to call him, but surely I’d only be a reminder of what he’d lost. And a reminder of how badly he’d botched things with his packmates. I didn’t expect them to let him off easily for faking a relationship.

“Yeah,” Cascade said. “I suppose so. I just don't want you to miss out on something that might be really good for you.”

“That’s enough about me,” I said. “Are you going to try things with Zara, then?”

“I don't know,” Cascade replied. “I would like to. I really did like talking to her, and she's so pretty. I would at least like to ask her out. You know. See where it goes from there. But I guess it depends on what you're doing with Alex. If you guys are going to hook up, that might make things awkward for Zara and me.”

“This got way more complicated than I’d anticipated.”

“I know, right?” Cascade asked. “But hey, it's going to be okay. We'll go home. We'll get some ice cream. I'll cram for my Spanish test, and you can watch some B-movie on the SyFy channel. Everything will look better in the morning. And hopefully, in time, Zara and Alex can be a part of everything. Maybe they'll work it out.”

“Well,” I said. “I do think you should see what happens with you and Zara. I mean, you’ll have a better chance than Alex and I. You weren’t the one lying to everyone. Even if Alex wanted to get with me for real, he’d still have to face his packmates over this whole mess. I’m sure they won’t just let it go. He lied to them. We lied to them.”

“True, but knowing Alex, I’m sure it’s not the first time he’s tried something like this,” Cascade offered. “From what you’ve said, he’s a bit of a joker.”

“That’s for sure,” I said. “I’ll miss that about him. He was fun to be around.”

I pulled into the driveway and parked in front of our apartment. As Cascade freed herself from the car, her heels held in one hand, I unlocked the front door.

“You got to wear a pretty dress,” I offered.

She’d bought that gown on sale from Amazon months ago, and it’d hung in her closet since then. She swore she’d find an occasion for it, so at least one of us had found a silver lining in all this.

“I’m going to hunt down that DVD where Sherlock Holmes faces a mechanical fire-breathing dragon while in a hot air balloon,” I said.

Cascade laughed. “Turn on the Spanish subtitles and we’ll count it as studying.”

“Because every Spanish test wants you to know the word for fire-breathing dragon,” I deadpanned.

“You wouldn’t know,” Cascade replied. “Being cursed with bilingualism, you’ve never had the dubious honor of taking a Spanish test.”

I wondered how Alex fared with his Spanish tests, but I didn’t mention it. I was determined to enjoy the rest of the night. Even if Alex and I couldn’t be anything, it’d been fun while it lasted. It had certainly left me with a lot to think about.