Lex

It was hard for me to believe it had been three months since I started working at Mr. West’s restaurant, but it had been. The time had flown by. Sandy and I sat at the Crab Shack drinking our afternoon beer and solving the world’s problems one disaster at a time.

“It sucks he dicked you over,” I said.

“I knew he would. They all do, sooner or later,” she said dryly. “It just sucks. He was cool until he turned into a douche.”

I laughed. “That’s funny. Cool until he turned into a douche.”

“They all turn into a douche,” she said. “It’s just a matter of time.”

“Not Adam,” I said. “He’s as good as it gets.”

“I need a biker,” she said. “One like him.”

“All his friends are taken,” I said. “Sorry.”

She shrugged. “Figures.”

“Have to work tonight?” I asked.

She shook her head. “I think I’m going to quit.”

I couldn’t believe my ears. “What?”

“Yeah.” She twirled her hair with her finger. “If my life’s going to get better, it’s not going to happen from me working there.”

I knew how much she loved dancing, and it made me sad to think she was going to quit. “That sucks, though.”

She twisted her mouth to the side. “I dunno.”

“Coming up behind you,” she said with a nod.

“What?”

I spun around. “Oh. Hey.”

Adam kissed me and then sat down. “What’s up, Sandy?”

“Not much,” she whined jokingly.

He chuckled. “Sad much.”

“Her and douchebag broke up,” I said.

“Oh.” He looked at Sandy. “Sorry.”

“If any of your friends are single, let me know,” she said. “But only if they. You know…”

He shook his head. “I don’t know. What?”

“If they’re like you.”

“Handsome and kind?” he asked in a sarcastic tone

She let out a sigh. “Kind of wild, and, well, hung.”

He looked at me, then at her, and then looked at me again. “What? You guys talk about that stuff?”

I finished my beer, and then nodded. “All the time.”

He laughed. “I thought only guys did that shit.”

I shook my head. “Nope. We talk about sex all the time.”

He looked at Sandy. “Smoke’s single. According to the rumors, he’s got a cock like a mule, but I can’t say if it’s true or not.”

“Is that big?” she asked.

I spit out a laugh. “Like a horse, Sandy. He’s got a dick like a horse.”

She widened her eyes comically. “Okay. Is that big? Is a horse hung?”

“Ever heard the phrase hung like a horse?” Adam asked.

She shook her head. “Nope.”

Adam laughed, reached for her hand, and lifted her frail arm. After looking at it, he released her wrist.

“Horses have a cock about the size of your wrist. Hell, I don’t know, maybe your arm.”

She looked at her wrist and then at Adam. “Oh, wow.”

“Can you set something up, maybe? I asked.

He shrugged. “If you want. Maybe we can all go out.”

Sandy swallowed hard. “I’d. Yeah. I’d like that.”

He looked at me. “You ready?”

“Yeah,” I said. “I still don’t get why you had to drop me off at work.”

“Told you, he said. “We’ve got somewhere to go.”

“Okay, we’re out,” I said.

“I’ll follow you out.”

I tossed $20 on the table, and Sandy did the same.

After bidding farewells, we walked to the bike. Adam laughed as he handed me some ugly helmet.

“What is that?”

It was huge and had a dark black visor that covered the entire face.

“It’s a full-face helmet. And, it’s got a special visor.”

“It’s ugly.” I handed it back to him. “I want to wear mine.”

“Tonight, you have to wear that. At least for now.”

“Why?”

“Because that visor’s not see-through. You can’t see through it. I had it made special. For you. For tonight.”

I wrinkled my nose. “Why?”

“So you can’t see. It’s a surprise.” He held it at arm’s length. “Just put it on. Half an hour, that’s it.”

I sighed, pulled on the helmet, and buckled the strap.

And, my entire world disappeared.

The ride to wherever we went was interesting, to say the least. It was similar to sitting on the bike in the garage with my eyes closed, only better. I wouldn’t want to wear the special helmet all the time, but it was pretty cool wearing it on that evening.

After the bike came to a stop, he shut it off.

I waited for him to tell me it was okay to take it off, and then began to wonder what the surprise was. During the entire ride I was immersed in trying to figure out where we were, and had forgotten about the reason for wearing it.

He unbuckled the helmet, and pulled it off my head.

I blinked my eyes, looked around, and quickly recognized the home from when we met the realtor a few weeks back.

“I thought you didn’t get the bid.”

He shrugged. “I didn’t.”

“Why are we here?”

He reached in his pocket, pulled out my car keys, and handed them to me.

I looked at them, and then at him. I didn’t understand. My car was at home. “Why’d you give me these? I don’t want ‘em.”

“Tough shit.”

I shook my head and stuffed them in my pocket. “Weirdo.”

I looked at the house. “Oh wow. Look. They planted another palm tree, and re-landscaped. That rubber tree wasn’t there.”

He looked at the yard and nodded upon seeing it. “C’mon.”

“What are we doing?”

He grabbed me by the hand and took off walking up the sidewalk. “We’re going to go fuck in there.”

The thought excited me to no end. “Oh my God. Tell me they’re letting you use it for a night. Tell me you have a key.”

“Nope.”

I followed him onto the porch, and then looked up and down the block. “I don’t want to get in any trouble.”

He tried the door, and, as I could have already told him, it was locked. “Shit. I wish I had the key.”

“Yeah, me too,” I said.

He looked at me. “You do. I don’t.”

I shot him a look. “Huh?”

“The key’s in your pocket.”

I pulled the keys from my pocket. A pink leopard pattern key stood out from all the others. I’d never seen it before.”

I pushed the key into the lock, turned it, and then looked at him.

He pushed the door open. “I’ll be damned, it fit.”

The smell hit me instantly. The smell of new. The tile, carpet, and paint were all new. The home was filled with furniture, and there was artwork on all the walls.

Everything that was broken had been fixed. After admiring the gorgeous home and its furnishings, I turned to face him. “Adam. Someone lives here.”

He looked around. “Yeah. Looks like it, huh?”

“Let’s go.”

“Come here,” he said. “Let me show you something before we go. It’s the best part.”

“What?” I said.

“The garage,” he said.

Three-car garages might have excited men, but they didn’t excite me at all. With great reluctance, I followed him down the hallway and toward the garage.

He flipped the light switch at the end of the corridor. “Garage is on the other side of this door.”

I sighed and then rolled my eyes. “Woo. Hoo.”

He pushed the door open.

My car was in the garage, and another car was parked on the other side of it. I was confused. Like, really confused.

I looked at him. “That’s my car.”

He nodded. “Yep.”

“Parked beside their car.”

“No. That other one’s yours, too.”

Now, I was really, really confused.

“Adam…”

“That’s your car,” he said. “And, that other one is one I bought for you. I figured along with the new home, you’d want a new car.”

He smiled.

My head started spinning. My mouth went dry. He looked serious. I opened my mouth and tried to talk, but couldn’t. Not yet. I was still way too confused.

“Why. Uhhm…” I murmured.

He must have seen it in my eyes. Or maybe it was when my legs went out, and I stumbled into the wall behind me. Either way, he finally locked eyes with me and told me the truth.

“I bought the house. And no, you can’t ask how. But it’s ours, and it’s legal,” he said.

I was filled with so much emotion I was shaking uncontrollably.

“Ours?”

At least I thought that was what he said.

He reached for the bill of his hat and tugged on it a little. “Yeah. Ours.”

I nodded, but I didn’t understand.

“I think things should come in a particular order,” he said. “And so far, it’s going perfect.”

It could have been the weird helmet he made me wear. Or, the fact that I still had no idea what was going on. Or, that I was just that dumb at that moment in time.

I turned my palms up. “I don’t…”

“We met,” he said. “Then, we kissed. Then, we committed to a relationship. Then, we made love. Now? Now, we need to live together and make sure you don’t get sick of me. If you can stomach living with me, I suppose the next step will be getting married. But, for now…”

He shrugged. “Will you live with me?”

I wiped the tears from my cheek. “I’d live with you in a cardboard box,” I said. “Or under the freeway.”

“Too late,” he said with a smile. “I already bought this place.”

“So, it’s really yours?”

He shook his head. “No. It’s ours.”

It was too much. Comprehending living in such a place was impossible, but I tried. Regardless of my lack of ability to grasp what was happening, I knew one thing, and I knew it for sure.

I was done looking at the garage, and I didn’t give a shit about another car.

If the house was truly ours, there was one thing, and one thing only that mattered.

It needed to be christened.

And, it needed to be christened immediately.

While I looked out at the ocean.