Pee Bee

I gazed down at him, wondering just how much time he had left. He was alive, but he looked like he wasn’t going to be for much longer.

My mother and Tegan had gone to the café for coffee.

The monitor beeped in the background as I surveyed the situation. He had oxygen tubes in his nose, wires and hoses strewn all over him, and various tubes inserted into his arms.

His eyes were closed, his cheeks were gaunt, and the skin on his face had gone thin. I couldn’t understand how so much change could take effect in less than a week.

Unless he was dying.

He was the man I’d spent a lifetime admiring. As long as it took me to become a man, I owed him my all. Through his awkward way of conveying himself, he had finally transformed me from the boy I had always been into the man I was certain I would remain.

I loved him dearly, and the thought of losing him was incomprehensible.

I lowered my head, said a prayer, and then cupped his fingers in the palm of my hand.

“I love you, Pop,” I said softly.

His eyes opened slightly.

He smiled a faint smile and moved his hand.

“I’m here, Pop. Tegan and mom went to get coffee. They’ll be right back.”

He nodded slightly and curled his finger toward his palm. I moved to the head of the bed and leaned over him. “What is it, Pop.”

He closed his eyes, opened his mouth, and spoke in a faint whisper. “I need to tell you something.”

I leaned over him, placing my ear close to his mouth.

He swallowed a few times. “Ice.”

I grabbed the Styrofoam cup from the bedside table, fished out a few chips of ice, and dropped them in his mouth.

He blinked his eyes.

After swallowing, he spoke softly. “I told you the two most memorable moments in a man’s life.”

I nodded. “When a man kisses the woman he’s going to marry for the first time, and then when he marries her.”

He blinked his eyes.

“I want to tell you the third most memorable,” he said, his voice faint and dry.

Don’t leave me, Pop.

Not yet.

I bit into my lower lip, nodded, and leaned over him.

“Third most memorable moment,” he whispered. “Is when that man and that woman give birth to a child.” With frail fingers, he squeezed my hand. “I love you, Son.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat. Or tried to, at least.

I fought away the tears. “I love you, Pop.”

He blinked. And, then, again.

His eyes fell closed.

“Pop?” I gently patted his shoulder. “Stay with me. Mom and Tegan are gonna be right back.”

He opened his eyes.

“You dip-shit,” he whispered. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ve got an anniversary coming up.”

A sigh shot from my lungs.

Thank God.

If nothing else, he still had his attitude.

I cleared my throat. “Doctor said you had another heart attack. They might want to do another ablation. Said it could--”

“These doctors are dumbfucks,” he said. “Not one of these pricks could find his ass with both hands.”

“But--”

He shook his head. “No.”

The doctor said having an ablation procedure was his only chance at survival. The last time he had one, he almost didn’t make it through the operation. Twice, they had to resurrect him with the paddles. In the end, the operation took eight hours. At that time, he said he’d never do it again.

It was the only answer, though. He was stubborn, but he wasn’t stupid.

“But--”

“But nothing,” he said, and then he coughed. “Not doing that again. I saw the fuckin’ light last time. Not interested.”

“Pop…”

He closed his eyes.

My mother and Tegan walked in. Mom stepped to the opposite side of the bed. Tegan walked to my side and handed me a coffee.

“He woke up,” I said. “But I think he’s delirious.”

He opened his eyes, searched the room, and focused on Tegan. “Hey, kid.”

“How you doing, Bradley?”

“Been better.”

“You need to get better,” she said. “You’ve got an anniversary coming up.”

He nodded. “Your hair looks like shit.”

She choked on her laugh. “Me?”

He blinked. “Yeah.”

She reached for her hair. “Helmet head,” she said with a smile.

“How was it?” he asked. “Fun?”

She nodded. “It was great.”

“Dumb ass go the speed limit?”

“The entire way,” she lied.

He tried to smile, and then shifted his eyes to me. “Keep her safe.”

“I will,” I assured him.

“You do that.” He closed his eyes. “I’m going to take a little nap.”

And he fell asleep.