-One

 

 

 

Lillia was lost. Not in the sense she didn’t know where she was, but in the sense she had no idea how to proceed. She wanted to walk all the way to her father’s lands and never leave them again. It would take nearly a full day of walking to reach her clan’s holding. The cold brisk chill of early eve and flurries changed her mind. She pulled Heath’s tartan around her and shivered. What was she thinking to leave the keep without her cloak?

The Fraser keep called to her, and even though she wanted to get warm, she kept walking. She replayed her discussion with Heath, his Uncle Andrew, and his mother. They were right; she was being selfish to the extent that if she cared for Heath, she should let him go. But the thought of doing so disheartened her.

Lillia lost her footing on a patch of slippery snow-covered ground. She landed on her bottom and slid down a steep hill. Try as she might, she couldn’t catch hold of the branches of yew bushes that spotted the landscape. Her body rolled to a stop when she reached the bottom.

She let out an unladylike expletive. Lillia ached, but more than that, her heart hurt. She sat up, bent her knees, and leaned upon them, hoping to compose herself. Still, she couldn’t hold back the heartbreak or slight of being injured in her fall. She wept and after a few moments of sorrowful regret, she looked up.

Ahead through the trees, she spotted a fire. Although she tried to step lightly through the woods, her leg hurt and she hobbled along. Surely the interlopers heard her coming. Lillia stumbled over a log hidden by a trace of snow. She pitched forward and someone caught her.

A man righted her and stepped back. “My apologies, Mistress.”

“Why would you apologize? You saved me from falling … again.” She searched the area and noticed he traveled with one other man, and two women who stood too far to discern who they were. They wore heavy cloaks, which surely offered protection against the elements. How she envied them.

“No man should ever touch a woman unless he is given permission. I apologize because I touched you.” He bowed to her and stepped back.

“You are gallant. Who are you?”

“My lady’s guard. She is yonder, there.”

Lillia peered around the man’s large form and saw the women approach. As they got closer, she recognized one of the women.

“Lady Fraser, ‘tis good to see you again.”

“Lady MacKintosh, you’ve returned.” Lillia hobbled towards the fire, hoping to get warm before she moved on.

“Leave us,” she said to her companions. “I wish to speak with Lady Fraser alone.”

The others meandered to the other side of the small clearing.

“My husband is visiting your keep. There’s talk of a treaty betwixt the two clans. I didn’t wish to join him there and decided to look for the last of the mushrooms before they die off with the oncoming cold.”

Lillia shook as a hale wind swept through the clearing. “I won’t speak of your … visit here in the woods, Lady MacKintosh.”

“Fiona, please. We’re old friends you and I, especially since you saved me from certain death. I envision that day often. If you hadn’t saved me, I would have plunged from that hillside. My poor, dear husband would’ve never known what happened to me. You are cold. Come, I have an extra cloak you can wear. Why are you out here in the cold without proper garments?”

“I’m wallowing in misery.”

Lady MacKintosh smiled. “They say misery loves company and I’m gladdened to have come across you. Sit and join me. Tell me what has caused this melancholy?”

She hesitated for a brief moment, but the fire was too warm not to indulge the woman. Lillia sat as near to the flames as she could get. With the heavy cloak around her shoulders, she warmed in short time.

“I’ve made quite a mess of my marriage.”

“Oh my dear. Most marriages suffer a wee bit in the beginning. Is your husband abusive? Has he harmed ye? If so—”

Lillia scowled. “Oh nay, not at all. He is compassionate. What I mean to say is that he is of a chivalrous nature. My circumstances forced his hand and he married me out of pity. I deem he regrets it now.”

“Regrets or not, I’m sure he’s pleased with you. You’re lovely and kind. And from what I’ve seen, verily brave. Aye, you are fearless. I much envy you for that for I don’t think I’d ever be as courageous.”

She lowered her gaze, her cheeks now brightening from the fire and the praise. “I shouldn’t have agreed to wed him and now he shan’t follow his lifelong pursuit. The king’s army is likely pursuing me, which will inevitably cause his clan to war and many in danger.”

“How wretched. If your husband cared about his lifelong quest, he wouldn’t have asked ye to wed him. And as for the king’s army, what would cause our gallant king to chase you all the way here in the Highlands?”

Lillia shouldn’t be forthcoming of her problems, but speaking with Fiona lightened her. “I always thought I was of the clan Hunter, but I recently found out that I am the kin of King Alexander. The Comyns seek to use me to unseat King Robert. The king wishes to imprison me to keep them from vying for his crown.”

Fiona moved closer and clasped her hand. “Oh dear, that is quite a wee bit of problems to squelch.”

She shook her head. “Oh, there’s plenty more. My father doesn’t know I’ve wed Heath. He’s going to be wrath that I’ve thwarted my betrothal to another clan, the Sinclairs. Surely they’ll seek retribution and wage war on my clan as well as the Frasers. Piled atop those issues, I am certain I’m expecting a bairn.”

“You poor lass. Are you not pleased about the bairn? I only ask because … There are ways to handle an unwanted child. What do you plan to do? Will you flee from your husband and add to the problems or shall you confront these issues head on like the brave lass you are?”

Lillia wiped at the tears, slowly falling upon her cheek. “Fiona, your words are gracious, but I am the farthest from being brave. I love my husband, yet I fear he doesn’t love me. Of course I would have the child, but I know not whether to tell him. I wish to set him free so he can serve God as he desired.”

Fiona opened a satchel and pulled a small sack from inside. “Let us ponder this. But first, I must tell you … I have wanted to give my husband heir for some time. I’ve tried many a remedy, but I haven’t conceived. Yet my dear Henry still professes to love me. He says it matters not because he has many a brother and nephew who would lead the clan after he’s gone.”

“I’m sorry, Fiona. And here I am wallowing in my problems. Is there aught I can do?”

“I only tell you of my plight because your husband will be beyond joyous at your news. All men want an heir, to carry on their name. You give him the greatest of gifts.”

She nodded, but didn’t feel he’d be as jubilant as the lady led her to believe. “I was going to leave, to return to my family and beg my father to send for an indulgence. That way my husband will be free to serve God. I shall need to hide from the king and the betrothal my father agreed to would be a saving grace for the clan lives too afar for the king to track me. That is if the Sinclair will have me.”

Fiona pressed a piece of bread in her hand. “Ah but you do not love the Sinclair, do you? Eat, you’ll need your strength. You know what I think, Lillia? That no problem is easily solved. ‘Tis likely your husband doesn’t wish to serve God any longer. As for your betrothal, your bairn nullifies that union. Surely the king has more urgent matters to attend to than care about a wee woman prevailing him. You can send a missive letting him know you don’t have designs on his crown. And that you refute any knowledge of your birthright. Inform him that you are married and are a modest woman, with simple demands of her husband. The king will believe such nonsense.”

“Mayhap you are right. I should return and reveal my news to my husband. He’s likely worried about me for I’ve been out here all day. I pondered these problems and to no avail that is until I came across you.” She squeezed Fiona’s hand in thanks.

Fiona patted her hand. “I believe problems such as these are best dealt with by joined efforts. Allow your husband to help you. It will certainly give him the manliness all men covet if he’s part of the solutions. Sometimes it is best to allow men to believe they’ve solved all our problems, when really we just want them to listen.”

Lillia laughed. “You’re correct in that. Will you come with me? I should be glad for the support and I’m sure your husband shall be gladdened you are with him instead of out here in the bitter cold. The night grows colder.”

“Aye, I shall come. There is something I wish to impart to my husband, a confession of sorts. And I do long for a warm bed.” Fiona stood. She directed the men to douse the fire. Her maidservant collected her belongings and followed them.

They started off toward the keep, and Lillia considered everything Lady MacKintosh told her. She needed to speak with Heath at the soonest and set all these problems to right. Upon their sojourn to the keep, Lillia grew weary. She wanted to sleep for nigh on two days, but first she had to reason with Heath.

Lillia entered the keep and stopped short at the opening of the great hall. Inside filled to capacity with many men. Voices rose and some clamored, boasted, and bellowed. She looked back at Fiona and back at the vast company.

“Are all these men from Clan MacKintosh?”

Fiona chuckled. “Nay, we brought only ten men with us.”

Near the hearth, she spotted her father standing beside Laird Fraser, Heath’s da. There seemed to be bit of revelry about the crowd, for the men smiled and laughed at many a jest. The serving women flitted about the chamber, refilling cups. She approached her father and bowed to him.

“You are no longer my daughter.”

“I was never your daughter. Yet you loved me once. Can you not again?” She wiped at her eyes, wishing with all her might that she would cease weeping. But his displeasure hurt her, and she despaired at being the cause of his rage.

Her father scoffed, but didn’t retort.

Laird Fraser held out his hand and she took it. “Lass, you’re safe and well. I’m gladdened to hear you wed my Heath, for I always knew you would make a handsome couple. Do they not, Aylmer? And cease your bristle, for the lass has been through a time. You cannot be angry with her, not as bonny as she is. By my faith, ye practically married her to the Sinclairs. That alone should make ye atone for that sin. Don’t send your daughter away in anger.”

Her father flinched as Laird Fraser spoke his peace.

Lillia squeezed Heath’s father’s hand. “Laird Fraser, you are kind in your words. But my da has a right to be ireful. I fled our home, and I should’ve told him I wished not to wed the Sinclair. But he should have told me of my birthright. I should’ve been prepared for what was to come. I should have told him long ago I wanted to wed Heath, but he was gone and I …” She trembled from having to reveal all to her father, the man whom she’d held dear in her heart.

Her father stood and pulled her into his arms. “Ah, lass, I’m sorry. Aye, you’re right. We should’ve told you about that. I’m relieved to see you safe. Are you happy being wed to Heath?”

With all that happened, the last thing Lillia wanted to do was draw her father into her problems. She nodded. “Aye, all is well.” Lord, she was really getting good at fabrication. “I shall leave you to Laird Fraser. Tell Mother I shall visit when I can. And I assume the lads made it home safely?”

Her father nodded. “Aye, all thanks to the king’s guard. Go and join your husband, for he is standing yonder with an odd expression on his face.”

She turned and found Heath directly beyond her, standing next to Lady MacKintosh.

“Lillia, where have you been all day? I wanted to come and find you, but as you can see, we were inundated with company.” Heath pulled her aside and kissed her face.

She relaxed and was solaced by his expression which was free of ire. Lillia expected him to be wrath about her absence, about what she’d said to him before running off. “I was out … walking and lost track of time. I came across Lady MacKintosh.”

Heath bowed to her. “My thanks for returning my lady, Lady MacKintosh.”

Fiona smiled. “I must go to my husband. He doesn’t look pleased to be in the center of all these men even with the drink flowing as it is.”

“Indeed.” Heath waved Fiona on and turned to her. “Our last discussion was filled with discord. I wasn’t certain you’d return. We must speak, but now is not the time. Your father came to retrieve you. I had to tell him of our marriage. He brought the Sinclairs with him and I’ve settled the matter. You need not worry over the betrothal to Angus.” He chuckled and motioned to the man who sat alone in the corner.

“Oh gracious be. I am gladdened to hear that. Can you imagine being wed to him? Now you know why I fled my home.”

“Aye. I saved Angus from death when a boar tried to skewer him. He’s indebted and has declared his desire that your betrothed be nullified. Then the MacKintoshs came. I hadn’t expected their arrival.”

“Fiona tells me there’s a possible treaty between them and the Frasers.”

He set an arm around her and pulled her close. Lillia delighted at the feeling of him against her, but she still smarted over what his Uncle Andrew said. If he wasn’t going to be laird of his clan, Heath would have to find another means to support himself.

“We plan to discuss the matter at length, when the night grows late, after most seek their beds.” He leaned close and his mouth by her ear, and he spoke low, “I can only assume the outcome will be beneficial since they came to us. But we shall see.”

“About what I said earlier …”

He pressed a finger on her lips. “Sweetness, we will discuss our marriage and all else later. Right now I am content you are here and safe.”

“I am well, just a wee bit chilled from my walk.”

Heath took a cloak from a peg hanging on the adjacent wall and set it around her shoulders. “Are you warm enough now?”

Lillia wished they were alone. She wanted to wrap her arms around him. “When I’m near you, I’m always warm.”

“Then I’m about to make you hot.” Heath grinned and tugged her hand to get her to follow.

She shrieked at his abrupt movements, but smiled when she regarded the grin he wore. “What are you about?”

“Warming you.”