- Ava -

“It was all a trick. He wanted revenge, and he realized that I might have tracked down Groti'ax's killer.”

Charlotte had heard the whole story. Now she glanced at Ava from the pilot's seat, her jaws working as she chewed her gum. “You sure?”

Ava sighed. “It all makes sense now. Shit, how could I have been so stupid? I thought he ... oh, never mind.”

“You thought he had feelings for you?”

Don't break down. Don't break down. Don't break down. “Yeah.”

Charlotte adjusted something on the control panel of the gunship. “In my experience, it's hard as fuck for an Acerex warrior to pretend something like that.”

“Well, this one did.”

Charlotte checked the hyperspace position of the five other gunships in her squadron. “If that's true, then he can go fuck himself, Ava. And I think it places him in major trouble with his king. Not to mention his queen.”

“I don't think he cares about anything. Just revenge. He got what he wanted.”

“Possibly condemning his own people and maybe Earth to war with the Kunuru. Hey, I kind of get the revenge thing. I do. But with that much at stake ...”

“He lives war. He has always been at war. He has always fought. So now it will go on forever. What does he care?”

Charlotte scratched her chin. “Yeah ... I don't know. Seems like he should care about his people. Harper will lose her shit.”

“And Goanesi will be just delighted. Now Space Expansion can go in with guns blazing as the first thing they do. I and my stupid peaceful approach have been proven wrong. Not effective. Too optimistic. False. It'll be in all the records and textbooks about alien diplomacy. Shit, he fucked me. And then he fucked me over.”

“That would be pretty unfair. You never got a chance to show you're right. And it sounds like it was working fine until Xark'ion killed that Kunuru.”

“Yes, but that will not be the conclusion Space Expansion draws. I tried with friendship. The outcome is that the Kunuru are now our enemies. So it must be ineffective. The details will be considered less important. This is what Space Expansion wants. They want me to be wrong. Well, it turns out I was, and they can prove it. And now we'll be at war with the Kunuru.”

“We don't know that. Maybe that alien he killed was unpopular. Or maybe they just won't react the way we think.”

“The first Earth representative they meet just slaughters their guy as her first act? I think their reaction will be pretty easy to predict. Fine, he provoked Xark'ion. It was unnecessary to dangle that scissor in front of him, with his friend's blood on it. But a squad captain should be capable of ignoring that. He's too smart not to. Such an obvious provocation. No, that was the whole reason he was there at all. He never told me that the Ysal battle was where Groti'ax died. He kept that from me. Fuck!” Ava hit the armrest with her fist, but it didn't help. She had been defeated. By a man she thought maybe loved her.

Charlotte tapped her lips with one finger. “The Acerex are more emotional than they seem. He may have been overwhelmed by emotion. I've seen it happen. Hell, it happened to Cori'ax. Made him do weird things, like rescuing me and Elerea Blaze from the Fire Planet. Totally irrational and impossible. But there he was.”

They dropped out of hyperspace, their jump completed. Acerex hung in front of them, a twin planet to Earth.

“There's only eighteen Kunuru now, I suppose. And the stars know how many robots and war machines and other aliens they'll press into their service. It will be a bad war.”

Charlotte located the Friendship and banked the gunship to set a course for it. “Hey, maybe his pals don't even know he's dead.”

“I think they do. He was in some kind of communication with them during the talk. I couldn't see any equipment. They might be in constant contact.”

“If there's only eighteen now, then they might not be too hard to defeat. I mean, if we seek out the Kunuru specifically. One by one. Instead of trying to fight the aliens they will send to do their fighting for them.”

Ava had never felt so tired. “Maybe. I guess we'll see.”

The Friendship loomed large ahead. If things turned out the way Ava feared, the peaceful ship might have to be converted into a warship. Then it would need a new name. Offering friendship was clearly not the way to handle aliens.

They entered the hangar and Charlotte landed the large gunship on the deck. “So. See you in the coffee shop in half an hour?”

Ava rose and got her pack. “Maybe tomorrow. I have to dictate the report about this fiasco. And then I'll need some sleep.”

“You sure you want to be alone right now?”

Ava put one hand on her friend's shoulder and squeezed. “I'm sure. Don't worry, Charlotte. I'm not suicidal. There's been too much death today already. Thanks for getting me. I'm sorry I couldn't offer you a real space battle, but I just couldn't stay in that shuttle for another second.”

“It's cool,” Charlotte said and powered down the engines, still chewing her gum. “I've been in plenty of battles. Don't need any more of them for as long as I live.”

- - -

Ava went to her cabin, avoiding everyone. She quickly dictated her report to a computer, knowing from experience that if she put it off, it would be less accurate, she would forget exactly what had been said and the details would get fuzzy.

Then she made a cup of coffee with a precious canister of natural spring water from Earth. Now she'd have to use up her supply pretty fast.

She sat on the bed and tried to keep the thoughts away. But they wouldn't be fought off.

She had loved him. And he had not loved her. It was as simple as that.

And she had fallen for his tricks. She had genuinely thought that he loved her, just like an Earth man would. Even if she wasn't his Mahan. She had wanted it to be true so much that she'd ignored the signs that he didn't care about her one way or the other.

Shit, he'd been so convincing! How could any man compare now? His strength, his touch, the fire in his eyes when they made love, his confidence in every situation, his smirk that would make her heart skip a beat, the deep pride she felt the few times they had walked down a corridor on the Friendship together, and everyone could see that this huge, powerful warrior was hers.

His sore grief when he talked about Groti'ax. His trust in showing her that. His understanding for her own trauma over the events when Harper was abducted. The way she would catch him staring at her face. The way he sniffed her hair. His own manly scent.

His gentle touch whenever he'd stroke his finger against the sleeve on her mis-shaped leg, accepting her fully ...

All lies.

She curled up in a sob that racked her body, and her coffee cup fell to the floor.

All that, and he didn't love her at all. Only an Acerex could have tricked her like that. His damn lust had overwhelmed her so much that it had drowned out everything else.

But she was only human, and her love for him was only too real.

- - -

Doctor Heming studied the full color hologram spinning slowly in the air. “You're pregnant. About three weeks along. Of course it can be hard to tell with half-Acerex babies. Congratulations.”

Ava's heart sank. Pregnant by an alien who didn't love her and she would never see again. She should have been more careful. But any kind of birth control just hadn't been anywhere near her mind during sex with Xark'ion. His sheer presence just filled up everything and left no room for common sense.

“Thanks. How long until delivery?”

“Again, hard to tell. These pregnancies develop fast. Five months?”

Ava nodded and started to put her clothes back on. Her mind was numb. She had no idea what to feel.

Her baby would be the first Earthling/Acerex child born on Earth. Maybe it would give him an easier start, make him a half-celebrity before he could even walk. Or maybe he would be an outsider, ostracized and different among the normal Earth kids.

If he or she would grow up at all. If the Kunuru could just turn a whole planet extinct in a few seconds, then there was a good chance Earth didn't have much longer to live. And Acerex probably wasn't much better.

Heming halted the spinning hologram and made it rotate a quarter revolution back. “And ... this looks a lot like twins.”

Ava froze with her utility suit halfway on. “Twins?”

“See this? The beginnings of a small head and a spine. And here is another. Too soon to say for sure. But I thought you'd want to know about the possibility.”

“Right. Thanks.” Ava couldn't see anything like a head or a spine on the hologram, but for some reason the news perked her up. Twins. Two new kids. At least they'd have each other.

“And you say you will be going back to Earth very soon?”

“I will. I've done everything I can here. There's not much left for me. Time to pick my own life back up.”

Ava had come straight to his office that morning, before she'd go to see Harper, but after she'd spent a good forty-five minutes throwing up and then cramping with dry heaves.

Doctor Heming nodded in understanding, although he didn't know the details of her decision. “Of course all the other half-Acerex babies have been born here on the Friendship. Well, except for that last one, who was born on the Fire Planet. I would not be doing my duty if I didn't advise you to stay here until the child – or the children – are born. We have more experience with these pregnancies than anyone else.”

“Is there a risk if I go to Earth and give birth there?”

The doctor scratched his head. “I honestly don't think so. These mixed babies seem unusually robust. I understand the father is not ... um ... in the picture?”

“I don't think so,” Ava said tightly and finished getting dressed.

“No? Then I have to ask: you're not his Mahan?”

“That's right.”

“Ah. All the previous babies have been the product of a union where the mother was the alien father's Mahan. I don't know if it's important. Probably not. But there's so much we don't know about the Acerex.”

“Tell me about it. Any risk with space travel? Say, the trip back to Earth?”

“Nah.” Heming didn't have the most talkative manner, but he was by far the best doctor in Space Expansion or he wouldn't be on the Friendship.

“All right. I'll come and see you again before I leave.”

“That's probably a good idea.”