- Xark'ion -

“We're making too much noise. We'll never find them like this.”

The night had been long and cold, just the way he liked it. The sky was clear, and the stars were slowly going out as the sun lit up the heavens. He'd laid down in his tent to sleep, but he could only toss and turn. He'd never had any trouble sleeping, even in the middle of long battles on alien planets when he'd just needed to rest his mind for an hour. But finally he'd just given in and gotten up before the sun.

It was still early, and the shadows were long.

He glanced over at Bruti'ex. “What? We're not making noise.”

His friend shrugged. “It must have been too long since you last hunted here. Perhaps aliens on distant planets don't pick up on your deep sighs and strange mutterings. But krex can hear you from six hundred paces away.”

Deep sighs? For a moment Xark'ion just stared at the older man, trying to see if he was joking. But his face was stony. And Xark'ion had been so lost in thought he wasn't sure if he could even remember how they'd gotten to this spot in the woods. There was a good chance he had in fact been sighing without noticing it. She was on his mind at all times.

“Ah. Yes, I suppose it's been a while.”

“I'm not blaming you,” Bruti'ex said quickly, clearly regretting his gruff tone. “Hunting at home and fighting away are very different activities.”

“Perhaps,” Xark'ion said. “But the warrior should be able to do both.”

There had been a pack of krex loitering around the village for a few weeks, and just the day before, one of them had been seen in among the tents. That could mean that the large and lethal predators were planning a massed attack on the settlement, and the only way to avoid it was to bring the fight to the krex. But almost all the men in the village were away on war duties, and Bruti'ex had asked Xark'ion to join him on a hunt to take down one krex and so discourage the others.

But if Xark'ion had in fact been sighing and muttering, then the krex would be alerted to their presence. The only unknown factor was what the unpredictable predators would do about it.

“We'll take a break,” Bruti'ex said and swung his pack off his shoulders. “Probably a young krex will come to us, and we can take him down at our leisure. Let us keep talking, so he thinks we're not alert. But let us always stay on our guard!”

“Let us indeed,” Xark'ion said gravely, hiding a smile. Bruti'ex was well past seventy, and he had the old man's tendency to state the obvious, as if he was always surrounded by small children.

They remained standing in the shadow of a vohn tree, and Bruti'ex handed Xark'ion a hunter's meal of sliced meat and boiled ben roots. “You have been away for a long time.”

Xark'ion bit into a piece of the boiled vegetable and relished the flavor of the hunter's meal. It took him back in time, to other hunts when he had eaten the same thing. But now something was missing.

“Haven't we all? We're always gone for months and years. Fighting for our world. Away from home.”

“Away from that which we're fighting for,” Bruti'ex agreed. “It's the warrior's plight. But you have been gone unusually long. Four years, I think. And you made Captain. They say you're good.”

The meat was cured and salted, and just as tender as it should be.

“But not good enough to save Groti'ax.”

“Men die in wars,” Bruti'ex said simply. “Groti'ax knew it. We all know it. It is the greatest honor. Even the king attended his funeral.”

Xark'ion spotted a dark shape behind a tree and touched the hilt of his sword, just to make sure it was there. “Groti'ax was special. The best we had.”

“Certainly he made us proud. But we have more good warriors. I see you carry his sword. You honor him. Perhaps more than he warranted. And now I hear you are in contact with the Earth aliens. Queen Harper's friends, even. You move in exalted circles these days, Xark'ion.”

The dark shadow was moving closer, very slowly. Its fur changed color to match its surroundings, much like the herg predators on the Fire Planet. Having hunted krex and learned the tricks in spotting them, Xark'ion had never been in danger from being surprised by an herg during his Trials.

“The queen asked me to do something for her. I'm not about to say no to a royal request. She was very polite. But I can only assume they needed a warrior, any warrior. And I happened to be close at hand.”

“I doubt that was the reason. They had something else in mind- there! To the south-east. One krex, just as I predicted. Let's just keep talking until he's closer.” Bruti'ex tensed and drew his sword.

“Very well.” Xark'ion had long since spotted the krex, but he had wanted the older man to think he discovered it himself.

There had to be a reason why Bruti'ex had wanted to go on this hunt. There were other, younger men in the village who could have done it. Boys, too, who would have relished the trust of being sent on a hunt like this. Probably Bruti'ex was here to confirm to himself that he was still capable of this, to feel that despite his age, he was still a full warrior. And Xark'ion had no problem with making the older man feel good about himself. There had been no risk.

But if Bruti'ex could get some use from this trip, then Xark'ion could, too. In a different way. Bruti'ex was that rare kind of warrior who had been married to his fated mate for decades.

“Bruti'ex. How did you know you'd found your Mahan?”

The older man shot him a quick glance. “I knew it because she was my Mahan and I was hers. It was obvious from the first moment. To both of us.”

“Ah. And how did you know?”

“Well, we just ... we knew.”

“And how did you know?” Xark'ion persisted. It could sometimes be hard to get older men to actually hear a question.

“How?” Bruti'ex pondered while trying to keep his eye on the elusive krex. “What a time to ask that. Well. I saw her and I knew. She saw me and she knew. The world changed for me. At that moment. The sky turned bluer. The air crisper. I noticed that the food I was chewing at that moment had a flavor. And it all came from her- where is he? I lost him!”

“Still in the same place,” Xark'ion said calmly. “Just changed his fur to match the bush. It happened in that one moment?”

“Which bush? That bor bush? Ah, there he is. Sly fellow, this. Yes, in that one moment. Why are you asking me this? You know that it's different for everyone, but it's also similar.”

“And it always happens right away? As soon as you lay eyes on her?”

The krex moved several paces closer on its two strong legs, keeping the bor bush right behind him, almost invisible against the green foliage.

Bruti'ex squinted. “Stay alert. He's about to attack. No, I heard it can take time. Sometimes. But then it's all the stronger. Some women faint when they realize that a man they've known for weeks is her Mahan. Some men, too. Or so I believe.”

“Why does it sometimes take longer?”

“It ... well, I don't know. We're all different. Why do you have green eyes and I have blue? It must be the same thing. The Spirits want it that way.”

Xark'ion felt like a teenager asking about these things. But he had never thought much about it. He had been sure that his life would be like that of most Acerex warriors, short and with no fated mate.

“Can it happen that one of them knows in the same moment, while it takes longer for the other to realize?”

“I don't know. I suppose. We must stand back to back now. He's close. Draw your sword.”

Xark'ion suppressed another smile. He had killed many krex before, and Bruti'ex knew it. Still the old man gave unnecessary and obvious instructions to a seasoned squad leader and captain.

The krex was still too far away to get ready for an attack, but there was no harm in getting ready to meet his claws, if it made Bruti'ex feel safer.

Xark'ion slowly drew Groti'ax's old sword. It felt unbalanced in his hand. “Has your life with Lolen'ia been happy?”

Bruti'ex had relaxed a little now that they were ready to meet the attack from the krex. “I can say without reservation that it has. It has given my life meaning. It's one thing to fight for your world or village. That's meaningful, certainly. But to have a true treasure, a part of you that you need to be whole ... well, it's how you finally become a full person. A full warrior. Yes, it has been happy. Deliriously so. I wish the same for you, and for everyone. Oh. Is that why you ask? Have you found your Mahan?”

The krex bounced ten paces towards them without a sound. They had their sides to it so it wouldn't think it had been seen. That was usually not necessary. Krex had trouble realizing that they could be seen at all, and that was their only weakness.

“I don't think so. Certainly my world hasn't changed. The sky is still the same color.”

Bruti'ex's breath was quicker now as he tensed for the attack. “But you have someone in mind?”

He might as well state it, as much for himself as for Bruti'ex. He knew the other man would never pass it on. “An alien woman. One of the queen's friends from Earth.”

The krex pounced, flying silently through the air and changing color with the trees and bushes behind it.

Bruti'ex reacted too slowly, and Xark'ion held his sword out with the edge towards the attacker. But the heavy blade twisted in his hand, so only the flat side of it hit the predator. It only made the krex land awkwardly on its back, but it rolled around in a split second and attacked again.

“Get him!” Bruti'ex yelled and clumsily swung his sword, trying not to hit Xark'ion. He missed the krex, but the animal was confused. It had expected a clean kill, but now it appeared that its intended prey was aware that it was there. It couldn't understand it, and now it was standing too close for its own good.

Xark'ion got a firm grip on the sword with both hands and sliced the krex in two, in the clumsiest move he could remember making with a blade since he was five. The cool air was filled with the earthy smell of krex blood, and the fur of the dead biped slowly turned from its camouflage pattern to a dark gray.

Bruti'ex wiped anxious sweat off his brow. “Got him at last. I thought you'd take him down as soon as he'd jump.”

Xark'ion picked a fistful of leaves from a bush and wiped the blade with them. “Still getting used to this sword.”

The older man looked around. “You were never a born swordsman, I remember. Can you see any more of them?”

Xark'ion didn't need to check. He had made sure there was only the one krex nearby. “No, this was the only one. And now his mates will think twice about coming to the village.”

“They will smell his death,” Bruti'ex agreed. “And we won't need to go hunting again for the rest of the season.”

Xark'ion arranged the krex in a position on the ground where it looked like it was mid-pounce. It would then be forever hunting. It was the proper way to leave a respected and defeated enemy. “We will not.”

They started walking back.

“An alien woman,” Bruti'ex said. “Seems too strange to be real.”

“It does.”

The old man laid a bony, but warm hand on his shoulder. “You're still in turmoil after Groti'ax's death. Many strange thoughts will occur to you. Many strange emotions. An alien woman? Yes, I know the king married an alien. They say she's his Mahan. Chief Ravex'ton, too. And mighty Cori'ax. They're renowned, famous for their skill and valor. But Xark'ion? Yes, you're a fine warrior. The finest our tribe has produced in all my day. But there are so many good warriors. Why would an alien woman be your Mahan? It is possible to feel affection for a female without immediately thinking she's your fated mate. It's only natural. I can only imagine how it would confuse you to meet an alien woman. I hear the Earthlings are much like us, but also much different. Of course it would have a certain attraction. The newness of it.”

“She is attractive. But yes, also very different.”

“Does she perhaps think that you're her Mahan?”

“I don't think they have fated mates. The Earthlings.”

“They don't? Remarkable! How can they then know when to get married? But it only makes this easier. If they don't have Mahans, then you can't be hers. That's all there is to it. Think no more of it, Xark'ion. If you are to have a Mahan, then you'll find her among your own. And you will be hers. Don't go looking for iron where there's only deadrock to be found.”

The old proverb made Xark'ion grit his teeth. Ava was many things, but deadrock? Gray, ugly stone that had no use? No, that was not a good comparison.

And still, Bruti'ex made good points. He was only Xark'ion. If he couldn't be her Mahan, then of course she couldn't be his. And it was possible that all he felt was an attraction to something new. His world hadn't changed when he saw her. Well, a little, perhaps. It was just ...

The thought of her being his Mahan had crossed his mind. Mostly because he wanted that, for some reason.

Yes, he was confused and saddened after Groti'ax had died. And now his deepest being probably just wanted something else to think about. That had to be it.

“My current assignment puts me close to the woman for long intervals. Should I disengage? It's a voluntary assignment, and I made serious mistakes on our first mission. I'm within my rights to find my own performance unsatisfactory. The queen would have to dismiss me, of course, but I think I can make that happen.”

Bruti'ex thought. “Hm. If you can disengage with honor, then do that. If she does dismiss you, then I suggest you spend more time here in the village. The wars are quiet these days. Many warriors are coming home. I'm sure you can be spared for a month or two. Relax with your comrades in arms, visit other villages, see if perhaps your Mahan is from another tribe. That often happens. And that's far enough. No need to try to find happiness with women from another planet.”

They were painful words. But also true.

“No need,” Xark'ion repeated. “I have spent too much time away from our planet anyway. Perhaps it's time to enjoy that which we have been fighting for. I will ask for leave for my whole squad. We all need some time to rest.”

Bruti'ex slapped his shoulder. “Precisely.”

He would have to do something that would make Ava want him gone.

But still, it would have to be something good, something that might save her life one day. He knew exactly what it would be.

He forced himself to grin into the rising sun. She wouldn't like it. But that was the way of the world. The most useful lessons were often the most difficult ones. And he wanted his last act for her to be valuable.