Chapter 24
Fisher
Present Day
Jesus Christ, I’m going to puke. I’m going to throw up right here on the sidewalk.
I agreed to meet Bobby at Barney’s to shoot some darts mostly because I was sick of listening to him bitch about how I need to get the fuck out of Trip’s house before I turn into an old man like him. For the last couple of days, I’ve done nothing but pace back and forth at Trip’s, wondering if Lucy read the journal pages I gave her. Did they make her sad? Did they make her happy? Did they remind her of a time in our lives when we had nothing to worry about but spending as much time together as possible?
Obviously, she either didn’t read them or they didn’t mean jack shit to her. Across the street, right in front of everyone, she’s got her tongue down Stick-Up-His-Ass-Ford’s throat. Fine, not down his throat because I’m sure such blatant displays of public affection would be beneath him, but still. Her hands are resting on his shoulders, his hands are holding respectably to the sides of her waist and their lips are fused together.
People are walking right by them not paying any attention. Don’t they see how wrong that is? Doesn’t it make them want to throw their fist against the wall and scream at both of them to cut that shit out?
Probably not. I guess it’s just me who feels like killing someone right now.
In theory, I know it’s just a kiss, but in my mind, it’s like they’re practically fucking right against the wall of Fisher’s Bank and Trust. A kiss is intimate, it’s trusting and you don’t give it to just anyone, but she’s fucking giving it to Staph-Infection-Ford like it’s no big deal, like she wasn’t clawing at my back and sliding her tongue through MY mouth and breathing heavily against MY lips a week ago.
I clench my hands into fists and count to ten when they finally break apart, Lucy giving him a small wave as he walks down the street in the opposite direction. I should walk away myself and pretend like I didn’t witness this shit, but I can’t. My old friends anger and rage are bubbling right beneath the surface, urging me to come out and play. I kicked them to the curb months ago when I learned techniques to express my emotions in a healthy, constructive way, but their call is so loud it’s ringing in my ears.
I charge across the street, my focus on Lucy as she turns and heads down the side alley next to the bank. People call my name and wave to me, but I ignore them. Turning down the alley, I see her halfway down, covered in shadows as she heads toward the beach. I watch the muscles in her smooth legs tightening as she walks and the skirt around her ass swish from side to side as her hips sway with each step.
I move faster, slowing when I’m right behind her and I can smell her skin and feel her heat. My arms wrap around her body and I quickly turn, pushing her face-first against the wall.
She starts to scream and struggle against me and I quickly wrap my hand around her mouth and press my lips to her ear.
“Shhhh, it’s just me.”
She immediately relaxes in my arms, her body melting against mine and it makes me angrier. She just had her hands and her lips on another man, but the sound of my voice still turns her to jelly. It should make me happy, should make me feel good about returning to this island to get her back, but it just fills me with jealousy.
“I saw you fucking kissing him,” I whisper angrily in her ear, one arm wrapped tightly around her waist while my other hand trails down her stomach to her thigh.
Lucy whimpers as my palm reaches the bare skin of her leg and I slowly slide it up and under her skirt.
She whispers my name softly, but I cut her off. I don’t know if she’s trying to get me to stop or urging me on and I don’t give a shit about finding out right now.
“Those lips are MINE.”
My hand keeps sliding up under her skirt, stopping when I reach the waistband of her underwear. My conscience is screaming at me to back away, but as soon as my hand slips under the cotton material and my fingers feel how wet her pussy is, I know there’s no stopping this.
“This body is MINE and it fucking kills me that you’re giving it to him,” I whisper raggedly as I swirl my middle finger against her clit.
Her hands come up, her palms smacking against the building on either side of her head as I tease her with my finger.
“I can’t stand seeing you with him. I can’t fucking STAND to see you giving him what you used to give me.”
I quickly plunge two fingers inside of her and she moans my name loudly, her back arching and forcing her ass right against my dick. I can hear the muffled voices of people laughing and talking at the opening of the alley as they walk by on the street, completely unaware of what’s happening a few feet away from them. The alley is so dark that they wouldn’t be able to see us even if they were looking, but hearing those voices should knock some fucking sense into me. Anyone could turn down this alley, using this shortcut to get down to the beach like Lucy was doing before I ambushed her. The thought of someone seeing us this way only makes me move faster and push harder, my body shaking against hers with the need to make her come.
My fingers slide in and out of her easily and Jesus, it’s the best fucking feeling in the world. I’ve missed the feel of her on my fingers and the heat of her body. I’ve missed the soft moans and gasps that fly from her lips when I hit just the perfect spot.
“Does he make you moan like this, Lucy?” I whisper, bringing my thumb down to circle her clit, pressing my fingers inside of her as deep as they’ll go.
She jerks her hips against my hand and begs for more.
“Please, Fisher… please…”
My thumb moves faster around her clit and my fingers push even deeper.
“Do you get this wet for him, Lucy? Jesus, you’re so fucking wet…” I trail off as I latch my lips onto the side of her neck. My hand starts to move roughly between her legs, pumping my fingers in and out of her so hard and fast that I can feel the muscles in my arm burning. I don’t think about hurting her or bruising her, I only think about marking her and leaving her with a reminder of me that sticks with her the next time she’s with him. My lips move back from the skin of her neck and my teeth take their place, biting down hard.
Each word I speak to her reminds me of the asshole she’s been spending her days and nights with instead of me, fueling my jealousy and anger to the point that I know I should back away. I shouldn’t be anywhere near her when I’m this fired up, but I can’t stop now that I’m inside of her.
I quicken the flick of my thumb over her clit, rubbing it back and forth, feeling it pulse against my hand as she moves her hips faster, helping me drive her closer to her orgasm.
My teeth continue to sink into the soft skin of her neck as I pick up my pace, slamming my fingers inside of her hard and deep until the sounds of people talking down the street are drowned out by the sounds of my fingers siding through her wet pussy.
I can tell by the hitch in her voice as she moans and how fast she’s moving her hips against my hand that she’s close to coming. I remember everything about her body, ever little nuance and sound, and I hate that she’s trying to erase all of that from her mind with another man.
“You think of me when you come, dammit,” I growl, my hand smacking against her pussy with the force of my fingers slamming into her so roughly and so quickly. “You see MY face, feel MY hands and shout MY name.”
I slam my fingers home one last time, as deep as possible and add pressure to my thumb. Lucy comes against my hand and my name is most certainly on her fucking lips when she does.
As soon as I hear her shout my name, something inside of me snaps. The angry haze that clouded my eyes and the fury in my bones slips out of me in a rush.
I let out a shuddering breath and quickly pull my fingers out of her, moving away as fast as I can. My back slams into the building opposite her and I bring my hands up to my head, clutching my hair in my hands.
Lucy turns, rolling her body against the wall like it’s boneless and takes effort for her to move. She’s probably in pain. I fucking pushed her against that building because I let my anger get the best of me. I swore to never hurt her again and look what I’ve done. I’ve reverted back to an animal who can’t control himself or his emotions.
“Fisher.”
She says my name softly and pushes off of the wall, taking a step towards me. The glow from a nearby streetlight illuminates her face and I immediately see a red welt on the side of her neck from my teeth. I drop my hands from my hair and hold them up in front of me, shaking my head back and forth.
“No, don’t. Just….stay there. Fuck, what the hell is wrong with me? I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry.”
The soft look in her eyes instantly morphs into disgust that I’m sure mirrors my own.
“Don’t you dare. Don’t you DARE apologize to me!” she shouts.
Her anger shocks me and makes me feel worse. I spent all those months away from her trying to find a way to control myself and, after just a few seconds of seeing her kiss another man, I’ve ruined all of the progress I’d made.
“I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have touched you like that. I’m so sorry,” I whisper, wishing someone WOULD come down this alley right now just to kick my ass.
Lucy shakes her head at me and swipes angrily at the tears on her cheeks. I made her cry. I hurt her and I fucking made her cry again. I want her to hit me, to scream at me and smack me and tell me exactly what kind of an animal I really am.
“You don’t get it, you just don’t fucking get it!” she growls as more tears fall.
I definitely get it. I get that I should have left her alone. I shouldn’t have come back here, believing that I was better and could make up for hurting her by being nothing but gentle and loving with her.
“That will never happen again, I swear to you,” I whisper brokenly, trying not to shed my own fucking tears in the process.
“Fuck you, Fisher. FUCK YOU!” she screams.
She turns and takes off running down the alley and all I can do is stand there and watch her go.