Friday

"You guys look terrible," I said as I put the tea kettle on the stove. Everyone else had picked up their kids and left. Bee and Mason, however, didn't look like they could move.

"It's his fault," Bee said and pointed at Mason. "For some reason he decided his last night as a single man meant no sleep."

Mason laughed. "You had fun."

"I didn't say it wasn't fun. But I have a hangover and in a few hours we need to go to our rehearsal. Penny, what are you doing?"

"Making tea."

"Why?"

I shrugged. "Because tea fixes everything."

"Is that what's going to happen to me once I get married? Will I automatically turn into an old lady?"

"Hey." I frowned.

"Sorry. Hangover." She pointed to her forehead.

"Penny's right," James said. "Tea really does fix everything."

I smiled at him. A couple years ago we had both decided to give up coffee in favor of tea. I had read some article about the soothing properties of herbal tea. And James was always really supportive with my weird ideas. I did feel healthier though. Although, when I drank coffee I didn't have a heart murmur. I shook away the thought.

Bee and Mason just stared at us.

"Yeah, we're going to become old people when we get married," Mason said. "I knew this was a bad idea. Is there still time to back out?"

"Approximately 30 hours," Bee said. "But then there's the issue of me really loving you. Decisions, decisions."

Mason laughed. "Don't you dare get cold feet, babe. I was only kidding. And really we should be mad at Penny. This beach trip was her idea. It's her fault that we have hangovers."

I placed a cup of tea down in front of each of them. "You're both ridiculous. How was it my fault that you drank too much? I wasn't even there."

"Exactly," Bee said. "My matron of honor ditched me. I had to drink away my sorrows."

"You know I would have loved to have been there."

"I know." Bee reached out and squeezed my hand before taking a sip of the tea. "Damn, it's actually really good."

I smiled. "See."

Mason took a sip. "Eh," he said and set it aside. "How are you feeling anyway?"

James wrapped his arm around my back.

"I'm good. The doctor said no travel, so we decided to listen to him for once. I really am sorry that we couldn't come."

"James, the beaches down in Delaware are awesome," he said. "You were holding out on me all these years. We'll have to make a trip some other time after your kid pops out."

"Sounds like a plan," James said. "A nice family beach trip is definitely in order."

"Ugh, no. I meant without the kids."

James laughed.

"Uncle Mason!" Scarlett squealed as she ran into the kitchen. "Aunt Bee!"

Mason put his hand on his forehead, wincing from her voice due to his hangover. But he still managed to smile at her.

Scarlett stopped at the stool he was sitting on and pulled on his pant leg.

"Hey, kiddo." He lifted Scarlett up onto his lap. "What do you have there?"

For not liking kids, he really seemed to adore Scarlett.

"I drew a picture of your wedding." She put the piece of paper she was holding down on the countertop. "This is you," she said to Mason and pointed to a stick figure with brown hair and a black outfit. "And this is Aunt Bee." She pointed to the figure with long blonde hair and a white outfit. I smiled as I recognized myself standing next to Bee. And there was James, depicted holding Scarlett in his arms. Tyler and Hailey were standing with Axel. Rob and Daphne had their arms wrapped around Sophie . Matt looked just like Mason but he was standing next to Jen and Ian. Bee's friends Marie and Kendra were standing to one side with glasses in their hands, which I found particularly funny, because Scarlett only knew them from a few girls' nights I had thrown here. Marie's husband, Carter, was even in the picture. I smiled down at the image. It was the most beautiful stick figure drawing I had ever seen.

"Can we keep this, Scarlett?" Bee said. "I think it's going to be better than any picture we get taken tomorrow."

"Mhm. It's your wedding pres... presen ... pre..." her voice trailed off and she frowned, unable to remember the word.

"Present?" Bee offered.

"Yes! Wedding present." She slid it toward Bee. "Mommy, can I put on my dress now?"

She had been asking me every half hour all morning.

"Not yet. The wedding isn't until tomorrow."

"But I don't mind sleeping in it. Pleeeeease?"

Bee laughed. "If you sleep in it, it will get all wrinkled. And you don't want that, do you?"

Scarlett scrunched her mouth to one side as she thought it over. "No. A flower girl shouldn't have a wrinkled dress. I'll go put it back."

"Put it back? Where did you put it?" I asked.

But Scarlett had already crawled down from Mason's lap and was running back up to her room.

"I promise I'm going to follow up on that," I said and sat down in one of the empty stools.

Bee laughed. "It's fine. The kids are going to be so cute tomorrow even if their outfits are wrinkled."

"Hopefully they'll be well behaved," James said.

"They'll be great, I know it."

I hoped that Bee was right. But I could just imagine Scarlett and Sophie throwing flower petals at each other instead of on the aisle. And after last night, Axel might just run off and try to find his mother instead of safely delivering the rings to the altar. It was good that the kids were coming to the rehearsal tonight. They needed all the practice they could get.

Bee set her empty mug down. "We really should get going. I'm in desperate need of a nap. Thank you for the tea, it actually made me feel a lot better."

"Of course. We'll see you tonight." I gave them each a hug goodbye and continued to sip my tea as James showed them out.

"Do you mind if I grade a few papers before we have to get ready for the rehearsal? I'm a little behind, especially since I'll be jet lagged after my flight tomorrow night."

"Yeah, that's fine. I need to get some work done anyway. What time is your flight?"

"I'm taking the red-eye. That way I won't have to cut out from the wedding early."

"Smart thinking."

He kissed my cheek. "Let me know when you're going to start hogging the bathroom so I can shower real quick beforehand."

I laughed. "You could just shower with me."

"I thought you'd never ask." He winked at me and grabbed a cup of tea before heading toward his study.

Now I definitely had something to look forward to. Just a few hours of work and I could get my favorite reward. I carried my tea to the library, sat down at my desk, and opened up my computer. Now that I had cleared the air with Hails, typing came easily to me. I poured my heart and soul out on the paper. I wiped away tears. I laughed. I immersed myself to the point where someone watching me probably would have thought I was suffering through emotional distress. I swallowed hard as I read the words that had once appeared in a note from James that I had typed up before I started writing the second book of my series. His notes were one of the reasons why fiction blurred with the truth. Because I couldn't change the words in his notes. They were perfect just the way they were.

 

"Only with you am I strong. Only with you am I good. Only with you am I whole."

 

I wiped away the tears on my cheeks. That's not true. He was strong. And good. And whole. He was all of those things without me. For some reason I couldn't move past those words. My two hours of productive writing had come to a grinding halt.

I put my hand on my chest. What if something did happen to me? How could I leave like this? With him thinking that was true. I pulled up a blank Word document and stared at the blinking cursor. James had a will. It was irresponsible for me not to. I'd feel better if I had one too. Not necessarily for leaving monetary things to people. I just needed James to remember my words. I needed to leave him with something. My eyes continued to focus on the blinking cursor. Scarlett's weird snake fears had gotten into my head. James' capturing my laughter had too. I needed to do this.

But for some reason my mind only got as far as writing "James" before shutting down. I said I didn't want any bad vibes. Making a will was the worst possible vibe. I closed my laptop and slowly stood up. We don't need a will, do we baby boy? I thought to myself as I wandered out of the library. Besides, what was the point of focusing on something terrible happening when my husband was waiting for me naked in the shower?