Black
Part of what made me so successful was knowing people’s stories before they told me. Many lessons my father told me started with what he referred to as lawyer knowledge: never ask a question you don’t know the answer to. Through my life, I’d altered that a bit. I liked to know their deepest secrets, darkest desires, and most sinful lies. With that knowledge, who they told me they were and who they actually were would never shock me.
Until recently, I’d had no need to dig into Quill’s past. Fucking Ronald Sterling had planted that seed in my mind when he mentioned his brother, and that bloomed into a necessity when Quill had mentioned his family with so much disdain.
Lee had done a background check on Quill when he began running deliveries for me. Lee swore there was nothing fishy, and even though he didn’t have a past we could blackmail him for, he wouldn’t blink at working for me. I didn’t ask more about it to Lee when he’d said that, and now I was very curious.
I asked Lee to stay behind as the others filed out; Lana and Quill off to shop, Jones and Ginger to work.
“What do you need?” Lee asked, eyes narrowed at the closed door.
“First, I will be addressing whatever issue you’re having with Jones soon enough, so don’t think the answer ‘nothing is wrong’ will fly. But right now, I need you to answer something for me.”
Lee took a seat beside his still open laptop, waiting.
“When you did the background check on Quill, you mentioned that he wasn’t shady but he wouldn’t argue over working for me, why?” Sitting behind my desk, I watched Lee’s reaction to my question. He was generally stone-faced, but he flinched when I asked. It was tiny, but obvious.
“When you ask me to do background checks, I always know what you’re looking for. Quill checked off all the boxes. He was fine. I didn’t think airing his personal laundry was necessary.” He held my gaze with a hint of defiance. He was defending Quill, and that wasn’t typical of Lee unless it was for Jones.
“I respect you a great deal, Lee, but you have to admit, what happened to Quill recently could have his past rearing its ugly head. You know what that past is, so you can tell me if I’m wrong.” I pointed to the door. “He mentioned a hatred for family. Ronnie said Quill’s brother and family were worse. That’s two factors.”
He nodded, took a deep breath, and spoke. “Ronald wasn’t wrong, and you’re not either, about it possibly being a problem. And before I tell you what I know, understand I stopped digging after I read enough.”
That was fair. “Fine, but you understand that I will be asking you to dig deeper.”
“Yeah.” Lee hit a few buttons on his laptop and began reading what I guessed was a written report. “Quill was actually born here in Haven Hart, lived here for about ten years. His father was killed by a gang on the steps of his bakery. Reports say it was due to the fact he used colors belonging to a gang here and refused to change them. It was about that time when Quill’s life went to shit, because according to what I could find, his dad was the most stable person in his life.”
Lee scrolled past what I figured was all the stuff he had already told me before continuing.
“He moved around a lot after that. His brother is five years older than him and worked at some shit places while his mother was a frequent flyer at many clinics and hospitals. I know this because I was able to hack into the Child Services sites and see that there were many visits for a Quill and a Dylan Almeida after their father’s death.”
Dylan. So that was Quill’s brother’s name. “Is his mother still alive?”
“No. She died of a heroin overdose when Quill was fifteen, leaving him in the care of his brother.” The way Lee looked at me told me of dark times.
“So, for five years, Quill dealt with a drugged out, neglectful mother. What about his brother in all that time?”
“The brother stayed pretty clean, but Quill has some hospital records. Broken leg, two arm breaks, four times he went in for stitches.” He shook his head. “Every time, Child Services was called, and every time, they ruled it a kids will be kids sort of thing.”
One thing I knew was how the system failed the ones they were supposed to be protecting the most. It was a wonder Quill was still alive.
“Go on.”
“There’s a small gap. I assume it’s where Quill must have run away, because the next thing I found was a slew of hospital stays here in Haven Hart. A lot over the last few years.”
I wanted those records. I needed to see. “Did you get those?”
Lee chuckled. “It’s funny, I can hack anything, any place Quill has ever lived, but I can’t hack Haven Hart records. Bank or Hospital. I’m only able to ever get so far before I hit a wall.”
Haven Hart was a fortress. It was one of the reasons I loved and loathed it so much. The Hart family protected this place like it was the best kept secret. We found out a few months ago, there were vaults below the city. Banks, hospitals, town hall. Mace and Bill were able to get inside one with the help of Poe, who was an aide to the Hart heir. The fact he was very good friends with Snow Manos worked in Bill’s favor.
“Contact Bill. Tell him I need an email or something on Poe. I need to get into those vaults. I don’t know how to get in contact with that man.”
Lee nodded and began texting. I sat in silence. Waiting for some response, my mind wandered to the hell Quill had lived and the similarities to someone else I’d known once upon a time. The shiver of regret and guilt began to eat at me like it always did, and I was glad when Lee interrupted my dark thoughts.
“Bill sent over the email address and I’m forwarding it to you. He said it’s the best he could do.”
“Fair enough. I want you to dig into Dylan Almeida’s life. Find out where he is. We need to see if he’s living obliviously or if he’s thinking of paying Quill a visit.”
Lee began packing up his laptop and was heading out when I stopped him. “Before you go, what’s going on with you and Jones?”
His shoulders sagged and a sad expression adorned his features. “I’d really rather not talk about it, boss.”
I understood he didn’t, we weren’t emotional people. We had no time for it and it showed weakness.
“I wouldn’t ask normally. I don’t care if you two are fucking, but I do care that it’s affecting my organization. So, you’re going to have to give me something.”
He placed his laptop bag by the door and sat on the couch. “Yeah, Jones and I have been sleeping together. It sort of just happened when we were on a job a few years ago. We never said we were together, never held each other up to a promise of monogamy. But…”
I knew where this was headed. The one place it never should have.
“You fell in love?” I asked.
“Yeah,” he huffed. “Freaked Jones the fuck out when I said it. But I’d held it in for a long time. The second I said it, he closed up. Started flirting with others. I’m sure he’s slept with others, too. I don’t have proof. But we weren’t exclusive. I couldn’t get mad at him.”
“But you did anyway?” I smirked, earning a chuckle.
“Yeah. He started avoiding me, and then with Ginger…” His head dropped forward in defeat. “I hate loving him, Black. It hurts too much.”
This was why whenever I felt jealous of Riordan or Mace, I smacked myself with a dose of reality. Love was an undefeated beast. It would take down the biggest of people and bathe in their ashes.
“Don’t you just wish you could un-love him?” I tried to be the person that helped others, especially my men, but in moments like this, I was on love’s radar. It wasn’t going to let me blindfold Lee, to turn him away.
“No, Black, I just wish he’d love me back.”
After Lee left, I found myself almost useless. His words drummed through my head over and over. He didn’t want to forget Jones, he wanted Jones to love him in return. Didn’t he realize the pain love gave you was worse than the loneliness?
It was late when I finally left the office for my penthouse apartment. My place was too large for me and I was too stubborn to fill it. Normally, I’d sip some whiskey and go over the loads of work I didn’t finish at the office, but tonight, I found I didn’t care about any of it. Between Lee’s heartache and Quill’s heartbreak, my mind was chaotic.
I sat there all night, staring out the large windows that overlooked all of Haven Hart. Miles and miles of city. Past the skyscrapers, lived the quiet homes where love blossomed, children laughed, and I was far away from.