Chapter 14
Beth
I sit in a window seat on the plane that Jacob chartered for our flight to Napa using the company plane. Tyson’s instructions were to take a long weekend, which will hopefully get us back to where we were before, a place where we were just relishing in this new relationship. Jacob’s idea to get out of town, instead of staying home, couldn’t have come at a better time. We needed a reminder that we were in this relationship together – a team – and that the controversy with this whole unknown marriage debacle would not affect our relationship any more than it already has. With Jacob being busy with work and then with the lawyers whenever he had a chance, time together has been scarce and I feel like a small cloud has been placed over us that we ignore.
I know that we need to have a conversation about what is happening with him, but I just don’t know how to bring it up without sounding like a controlling girlfriend. Jacob doesn’t seem to want to talk about it much. He is visibly stressed but putting on a good face when we’re around one another. I still can see the worry lines, the tenseness of his stature and the stress emanating off him. The flight was a half hour, tops, and soon we were debarking down the steps and onto the tarmac. Jacob takes my hand as we walk towards the Napa County Airport terminal; we walk straight through wordlessly to a parked convertible on the other side of the double windows in the front of the airport.
I look to Jacob.
“Yours?” I ask.
“No, a rental.” He smiles as he opens the passenger door for me and motions me inside.
Soon, we’re on the road with the wind in my hair and a smile on my face. I’ve never been in a convertible before and I can say that the smile was short lived as a it feels like a million bugs decided to commit suicide on my teeth and my previously blow-dried hair was now whipping me in the face. Just by the feel of my hair, by trying to control it, I could tell it was a rats nest. A battle of getting my hair out of the way to clean off the dead bug guts plastered to my two front teeth was a task in itself.
Jacob must have noticed some of the struggle that I was having as he slows down and rolls up the windows, deflecting some of wind to over our heads. His hand lands on my thigh and he squeezes as he picks up speed again.
I was appreciative, but still struggling as now I felt that I looked like I train wreck. I pull the visor down, look in the mirror and check my teeth. Once I knew I was free of any remnants of the bugs, may they rest in peace, I tackled my hair next. I pulled it into a ponytail and then look to Jacob who just smiles.
We pull up to a house in the heart of downtown Napa, a cute, white, paneled cottage with a manicured lawn and a giant tree providing shade to the front part of the house. Jacob grabs our bags from the trunk, leads us up the front steps, and keys in a code on the access panel beside the door. Then, as if the house knew we were entering, lights flood the entryway.
I step across the threshold, through a small mudroom and into another entryway that takes us into an open floor plan with two couches and two recliners facing a great window and a fireplace. Even further into the home was a chef’s kitchen and a farm table off to the left with french doors leading to what I am assume is the backyard.
I run my hands against the granite countertops of the kitchen as I walk to the sink and look out the window above to a gorgeous redwood deck overlooking a pool and hot tub.
Jacob stands behind me and traps me between his arms as he leans in and nips at the back on my neck.
“Come on, let’s go change for lunch, maybe fix that hair of yours. What the hell did you do to it?” he jokes, as he pulls me by the hips and directs me to a longer hallway. We pass by two bedrooms and a bathroom on our way to the master bedroom at the end of the hall. The master bedroom had a sleigh bed and a bedside table, with a flat screen television mounted on the wall in front of the bed. There is an en-suite with a large glass shower just begging to get steamed up. The decorations are minimal, but tasteful. The home feels masculine and as if it was lived in.
“So, is this one of your homes?” I ask Jacob, as I walk back into the bedroom.
“No, I rented it for the weekend for us,” started Jacob. “My only property is the penthouse.”
“Really?”
“Why is that a surprise?” He tilts his head in question with a small smile.
“I’m just surprised, that’s all. I mean you’re a Maddox.”
“And just because Maddox is my last name, that doesn’t mean that I spend my money on frivolous things like properties or cars that I would barely use but pay constantly on. I’d rather my money be spent on things that I actually have regular use for. I think you know by now, I’m not the guy that everyone thinks I am. What you see, isn’t what you get. ” His voice sounds a little hurt of my assumptions.
“I’m sorry.” I begin to apologize. “I’m getting used to the real version of you. And you’re right, you aren’t at all the person that people think you are. You’re so much more.” I smile ,rounding the bed and draping my arms around his neck, pulling his body against mine as I lean up on my toes and kiss him.
“So much more?” He pulls back with a smirk.
“So much.” I say, pulling him back to me and inserting my tongue between his lips.
Suddenly, he picks me up by the hips and I yelp as I fly through the air and land on the bed as if I weigh nothing.
“No time for friskiness, baby. We have food to eat and booze to drink.”
“What about a little bit of frisk?” I hold out my fingers an inch apart for measure.
“Frisk isn’t a real word.” He laughs.
“Is too. Haven’t you ever been arrested?” I ask while standing, as I lower my voice to mimic a cop. “Sir, please turn around, I’m going to have to frisk you. Oooh, do you have handcuffs?”
“Completely not how I was expecting tonight to go.” He shakes his head.
“Did all the sexiness leave? Am I the only one excited about this now?”
“While I would love to see you wearing handcuffs in the kinky manner, I’m afraid I do not have any with me. I’ll make sure to pick some up when we get back to the city. Now, get changed, we’re going out to lunch.”
“What if I want you for lunch?” I smile.
“Insatiable little minx.” He shakes his head with a grin on his face and teasing glimmer in his eyes, hinting to his thoughts. We’re standing a foot apart while his fingers are hooked in the belt loops of my pants.
“A girl wants what a girl wants.” I shrug while running my hands across his shoulders.
“Fuck it! Lunch can be a little late.” he says, pulling his polo shirt over his head and advancing on me.
Jacob
We lay in bed, a little tipsy from all the wine we’ve consumed throughout the day, along with the bit of time we spent in the hot tub before retiring to the house for the evening. We went to three different wineries today, sampling wine and enjoying each other’s company. Over dinner, we enjoyed conversation, candlelight, and a violinist playing in the background. It was a truly romantic day and I feel that we’ve become closer, almost back to how we were before the news of being married came to our knowledge.
Beth’s leg was draped over mine and her head was on my chest, her fingertips were circling my nipples, alternating between the two as we enjoy the silence. We were naked, but we hadn’t taken advantage of that fact, just fully relaxed in each other’s company.
“I’m sorry for the past few weeks. I’ve been distracted.” I begin. “This whole thing, this so-called marriage has taken me by surprise and then I’ve just been zeroing in resolving the matter as fast as possible.”
Beth’s head lifts and she looks at me softly. “It’s okay, I understand.”
“You shouldn’t have to understand. That’s the thing. I should be more present with you. It’s not okay. I feel like I haven’t been the guy you deserve.”
“Wait, what are you saying?” she asks, sitting up, her back stiffening as she bites her lower lip.
I run my hand over her hair and smile as I kiss the tip of her nose. “You come first.”
“No, we come first.” She smiles as she relaxes and lays her head back down on my chest.
I’m not big on declarations, but a part of me wants to be vocal about what I feel for Beth. Another part of me feels that she could think it’s too soon for any of this. Especially with the marriage hanging over our heads. The past few weeks, trying to squash this marriage, has only solidified my feelings for her, in that I would rather have her as my wife, that I want her has my forever. I hope that’s in our future. Life before her was dull, it was meaningless and empty. Since we’ve been together, I’ve felt full of life and as if there was meaning placed behind certain words. Words such as love. Words like forever. Am I ready to say it out loud? That I love her?
Making sure this divorce goes through and quickly is a priority, but she’s right – our relationship should come first. And I need to step it up and make sure that she knows how important she is to me.
“Hey, B?” I start.
She doesn’t answer and I contort myself enough to look at her and see that she’s fallen asleep.
I love you.
***
We danced, we ate, we drank and we made love. There wasn’t a moment that went by when we weren’t touching. And then when we weren’t, I wanted to be touching her. I should have told her I loved her a thousand times during our weekend away, and that’s not to say that we didn’t have moments when the timing would be perfect. I just couldn’t choose the perfect time at the exact same moment. I had several ‘this is the time,’ moments, but I let them pass.
I just couldn’t grow the balls to spit the words out, although I was constantly repeating it in my head. I was afraid she wouldn’t share the same feelings and I was in this alone. I know that she cares for me, that she likes me a lot. Hell, she went through pretending that she had a boyfriend to get my attention and make me jealous. It worked, and now I had the woman that I could rightfully say for the first time ever that I was in love with. Now only to tell her.
It was Sunday afternoon and the plane was landing back in San Francisco. We were returning to the reality of our daily lives and I wasn’t prepared for it. My lawyer was talking about my going to Vegas and that would mean I would be away from Beth, unless she would be willing to come with me. That thought wasn’t too outrageous; we could have a great time together in Sin City. Although, would she want to come with me there, to a place where I was dealing with such a pain in the ass as divorce? Would the circumstances of why I was there tarnish our time together?
My entire body was dreading the thought of leaving her, being without her, and waking up to an empty bed. I’ve grown accustomed to waking up with her in my arms over the past few days, with her body entwined with mine during the night and then there’s the morning sex. Man, do I absolutely love morning sex.
We briefly touched on what was going on with this marriage debacle. I opened up about my thoughts on every piece of the marriage and the divorce. Deep down, I feel guilty that I’m married to someone who is not my girlfriend. I can only imagine how she feels about it. She has been primarily silent on the whole thing. If the roles were reversed, I can guarantee that I wouldn’t be taking the situation as well as she seems to be.
As we get in the waiting town car, I pull her to my side, generating a questioning look from her.
“I just need to touch you.” I say softly.
“Aren’t we romantic?” she states with a smile, as she settles in beside me and placing her head on my shoulder.
“Stay with me tonight?” I ask.
“Not tired of me yet?” she responds.
“Never.”
I alert the driver that we have only one destination as my hand holds onto Beth’s as if I never want to let go.