Chapter8
When Yuri returned to New York from his business trip, the first thing he wanted to talk about was the wedding. “Did you make a decision about when?” he asked her.
Heather had a day off work and came to meet him for lunch. They sat on the balcony floor of one of New York's newest restaurants. The cuisine was European and the interior was glass and metal. It was spacious but a little on the busy side because it was new. Heather felt self-conscious; partly because of the looks they were still getting from people who recognized them from the newspaper and magazine reports. Only a week ago, Laura Madison had her interview published in Cosmopolitan and there was another picture of Yuri and Heather in there.
It was the publicity that told Heather she could not run away from Lemar and his threats – where could she hide? Asking Yuri for the money was her only option, especially as she didn't want to lose him by running away. But finding the best way to approach the subject had given her sleepless nights.
She had finally found a solution. “I was thinking,” she said, “How about a winter wedding after all, like you said, or even fall?” She was smiling, a fake smile that she hoped Yuri would not see through. She had barely eaten anything and laid down her knife and fork as she waited for an answer.
“I'm totally fine with that,” he said. “Did you have a date in mind?”
“How about late October. It's not too cold and before we get snow.”
“It doesn't have to be in New York, remember? There's the island. I'm sure a lot of people would love to come to a Caribbean wedding. What do you think?”
“People? Who would you invite? You don't have family,” said Heather.
“It would be close friends. I'd say about ten people. We could fly them all out. What about you? How many of your friends?”
“Maybe just a handful, people I've worked with these past few years.”
“No one from before that?”
Heather didn't say anything but picked up her fork and started moving her salad around the plate.
“What is it, Heather? You've been very quiet since I got back. Want to tell me what's wrong?”
She looked straight into his eyes and didn't blink. “Yuri, I have something to ask you. It's big and if you say no, I can completely understand.”
“Why would I say no to you?”
“Because it's seriously a lot to ask of you and because I wasn't honest with you about my past.”
“In what way?”
“I-I told you I had no family. That wasn't strictly honest. My-my father is around and he's in big trouble with some people.”
“Your father? You mean you might have someone to give you away?” Yuri brightened. “That's good, isn't it? Or, wait, you said your folks were no longer around, so if you wanted to keep him out of your life, you don't want him at your wedding.”
“That's right. My childhood was nothing to write about and when I got to my teens, well, I was pretty much abandoned by my folks.”
“That's terrible. You know you could have told me all this before.”
She shook her head. “I wanted to forget but now something has come up.”
“Concerning your father?”
“That's right.”
“You need money, don't you Heather?” He leaned an elbow on the table, lowered his voice.
She looked up at him, alarmed. She wondered what he knew.
“Your father is in trouble,” he went on. “He's contacted you because he knows I have money and he needs someone to bail him out.”
She nodded.
“Heather, it's all right. Anything you want of me, you can have. Everything I have is yours. How much does he need?”
She closed her eyes and exhaled. “I can't even bring myself to say.”
He put his hand on hers. “Just tell me, the check is as good as written.”
“Yuri, it's $300,000.” She could not look at him.
“I'll have Susan arrange a bank transfer.”
“He'll need cash.” She looked up quickly.
“Okay,” he said, dragging out the word. “When?”
“I need to get it to him by tomorrow evening.”
Yuri pulled out his cell phone and called Susan. “Hey Suzie. I want you to withdraw $300,000 cash and you and someone else deliver it to Heather's apartment by five tomorrow evening.” He clicked off his cell. “Done,” he said. “And are you definitely sure you don't want your father to give you away? Things might have changed. It was a long time ago.”
She shook her head. She reached across the table and took Yuri's hands. “This is a one off. I told my father. I'm so sorry to have to ask, it's not the way I wanted our lives to start out. Yuri, can you ever forgive me for this?”
“Heather, there’s nothing to forgive; it's your father. People have a way of showing up out of the blue when they think they're entitled to something. We pay him off and we start our lives fresh. We never have to look back, only forward. Okay?”
She blinked tears down her face and smiled at Yuri through glassy eyes. He came and sat beside her, put his strong arm around her shoulder and kissed her.
“You want to leave?” he asked. She nodded.
***
It was the day; the day Heather had been dreading for a whole week. Ever since Lemar left her apartment, the whole place had never felt the same. She couldn't wait to be moving in with Yuri. They had her move planned for the weekend. Heather had given notice to both her jobs and was concentrating on getting a university place for the next term. She was awaiting a response from Cornell, Columbia and NYU.
Susan arrived at her apartment just before five o'clock with the money in a soft bag. $300,000 looked inconspicuous as sports clothes. Carrying it to her meeting place with Lemar, Heather might look as if she were going to the gym. Heather could barely look Susan in the eye when she handed Heather the bag. Susan had come up to her apartment without the security guard and stood just inside the door clutching it to her chest. When she finally got Heather to meet her eyes she held the bag out.
“Thank you,” Heather said but Susan hadn't quite let go.
“Yuri is like a brother to me, Heather,” she said.
“Yes, I know. I understand that.”
“He's absolutely crazy about you and would give you anything you ever asked for. I know this for a fact. But one thing I won't do is stand by and let my friend be taken for a ride. What is this all about Heather?”
“Susan, with respect, it really isn't any of your business. I've spoken to Yuri. He didn't have to do this, he had a choice.”
“But not really, not when it comes to you.”
“You think I don't love him? You think all I want to do is extort money from him? Is that what you think of me, Susan?”
“I thought you were the real deal, Heather, always have done, but this just seems so out of place. I have a bad feeling.”
“Don't think for one moment I'm taking this lightly; I have to do this. Susan, you could never begin to understand. I just have to. Yuri and I, well, after this we just move on. Like it never happened.”
“But $300,000 is nothing to be sneezed at. True, Yuri can afford it but is this the last of it?”
“Yes, of course.”
“And you're sure?”
“Look, Susan. You don't police Yuri's money. Don't forget I'm about to become his wife.”
Susan let go of the handle, the bag sagged down with the weight of the money to Heather's side. She let it drop to the ground.
“Okay, Heather, it's all yours,” Susan breathed. She turned and let herself out of the apartment without looking back.
Heather sat on the sofa, her arms around her knees, just staring at the money. It was just a few hours before she had to be across town at the bar she used to frequent with the crowd she was running with from the age of fifteen. Far too young to be drinking, far too young to be doing lots of the things she was doing in those days but that world seemed a lifetime away. She wondered how easy it would be to rub this reminder of her past away once she'd handed over the money to Lemar and turned her back on him.
Later, she dressed in dark jeans, a black t-shirt and pulled on a thin black hooded sweater. She picked up the bag and headed for the subway. She held the bag on her lap, firmly gripping it with the strap twisted around her wrist so no one could grab it away.
Arriving in the seedier part of town sent shivers over her skin. She hadn’t been there in years and hoped she would not see anyone she knew. She wondered how different she looked now. Surely, she was cleaner and better dressed but with every step she took, she couldn't help feeling the place was dragging her back by its claws, that she had never moved on from being that druggie teenager who would’ve given her life to Lemar for her next fix.
She looked up at the battered neon sign: Ronnie's Yard. Most of the letters were not lit up, the windows were blacked out, as usual, and the crack in the front step where a drive by had shattered the concrete had still not been repaired.
Heather pushed the door and the familiar smell of booze and hot bodies swept over her like a beaten up blanket. She saw Lemar straight away. He was at the back, shooting pool and didn't even look up at the door. She didn't recognize the people he was with but marched straight over to him and leaned her hand on the pool table as he was about to take a shot.
“That's not very friendly,” Lemar said and let out that chilling laugh from the other week.
Heather shuddered. “Here.” Lemar shoved his pool cue into the hands of a skinny boy who looked about twelve years old.
He grabbed Heather's elbow, pulled the bag from her hand and led her through the familiar, plastic strip curtains that led to a back room. It was filled with smoke and fairly crowded compared to the front part of the bar.
“All here?” he asked her, lifting the bag.
“Of course.”
“I'll trust you, I always used to.”
She said nothing but followed Lemar who dragged a guy out of a table in a corner, his friends followed close after, taking their drinks with them.
“Sit,” he said to her, dumping the bag under the table.
Heather shook her head. “I can't stay,” she said.
“Yes you can, H. You can stay and be sociable for one second, I may never see you again.”
She sat opposite him. “You'll never see me again, you understand?”
“After all we've been through, after all that time I did for you.”
“For me. Don't forget I went to prison too,” she hissed.
“But not with the charges I carried for you.” He leaned forward.
He smelled of stale clothes and stale breath. Heather couldn’t remember what it was she ever saw in this man. At the time, she wanted to escape her family but it was a case of out of the frying pan and into the fire when she met Lemar. Nothing went right for her since meeting him.
“Look, I can't take away the past,” she said through her teeth. “I've paid for my mistakes inside and outside prison. I've finally turned my life around and now you've got the money to do the same. Consider the slate wiped clean.” She got up.
Lemar grabbed her wrist. “Don't you ever miss me? Not even a little?” he asked, eyes boring into her.
She flung his hand away and stormed out of Ronnie's Place in a such a rage she barged someone aside, no time to apologize. She waved her hand when she saw a taxi going by Ronnie's. She could tell the driver was reluctant to stop. Anyone coming out of Ronnie's had to be carrying a weapon, was wasted, or both. She had to run the extra feet it took for the driver of the cab to make up his mind to stop for her. She gave Yuri's address and the driver pulled a face. Maybe he thought she was a call girl going from this place to plush Manhattan address. She didn't care. She just had to get out of there and go to Yuri.
“Heather?” he asked when she arrived and threw herself at him. “You got it sorted out?”
She nodded.
“It's okay,” he told her. “We never have to talk about this again. Have you eaten?”
“I couldn't eat. I need a bath.”
“Sure.”
Heather went into the bathroom and turned on the taps. She slipped off all her clothes, knowing she'd throw them all into the trash. She got into the bath while the water was still running and closed her eyes. Yuri knocked on the door.
“Do you need anything?” he asked from the other side.
“No, I just need to soak.”
“Okay, fine. I'll be in the living room, watching a film.”
Almost an hour later, Heather emerged from the water which was beginning to cool down. She had a desire to be in Yuri's arms now that she had soaked away the past and the pain meeting Lemar had caused. She walked into the living room in just a towel.
“Wine?” he asked, turning to her.
Heather shook her head 'no'. Yuri got to his feet. He pulled Heather back to the sofa by the top of her towel. He unraveled it and let the towel slip to the floor. Stroking her shoulders he kissed her forehead. Heather closed her eyes and sighed. He caressed the skin on her shoulders. There were a couple of drops of water on one, which he kissed away. Next he cupped her breasts in his hands and began to squeeze them, gently at first and then harder.
Heather's skin was slightly damp but dried quickly under his touch. He flicked his thumbs over her nipples; they were hard. She sighed and tilted her head back. Yuri took her face in his hands and kissed her, his tongue flicking deep inside her mouth. She pulled him to her by his shoulders and kissed back just as aggressively.
They sat down on the sofa, Yuri pulling her on top of him to a lying position. Heather pressed her lower body into his as they continued to kiss. She was becoming wet as she gyrated against him and could feel that Yuri was hard and just as anxious for full intercourse. She hovered above him on one knee, helping him off with his pants, the shirt could stay, she was hungry for him to be inside her. Heather turned them around until she was beneath Yuri, one leg up towards the backrest of the sofa, the other on the floor. She guided him inside her, jerking her body up and down; her eyes clenched shut, breathing heavily.
“Harder,” she said to him, “harder.”
Yuri thrust with an increased energy. She wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled in with every thrust he made. She was coming fast; he wasn't far behind. His orgasm was vocal, hers a grunted sigh through gritted teeth as she convulsed with passion until her orgasm finally subsided.
Yuri looked into her eyes. “Welcome back,” he said. “You were miles away from me when you walked in.”
“It's good to be back.” Her arms were tight around Yuri now and her emotions were telling her she must either laugh or cry. She chose to laugh.
“Better?” he asked, looking at her happy face.
“Much. I think I can eat now.”
“Let's do it.”
And like that, the past was behind her again. All that mattered was Yuri, and all she wanted to do was marry him and move on with their lives.
*
Heather and Yuri's wedding date was announced in the newspapers. They had sent out the invitations to twenty people whom they would fly out to the Caribbean to share their wedding day. Heather was excited, she had invited Janey over to help her look through bridal magazines so she could choose a style for her wedding dress.
“It mustn't be too fussy as it'll be hot,” Janey said. They were sitting out on the balcony of the luxury flat. “What about this? Wait, are you going for white?”
“I was thinking cream or pearl white. It just has to make me think 'wow' when I see it so maybe strapless, maybe crystals. Should I go calf length as it's on a beach?”
“No, you can still go with a long dress,” Janey said flicking the pages of a magazine. Just then, Heather's phone rang. She held up her forefinger and winked to Janey.
“I should get this.” She looked at the screen on her cell but didn't recognize the number. “Hello?” she said.
“Hello, H.” It was Lemar.
Her blood froze. “What do you want?”
“Now, is that any way to treat the love of your life?”
“How dare you...” Janey shot a look at Heather, who got up and began to walk back inside the apartment. “I'll be back in a second, Janey. You keep looking.”
Heather smiled to Janey but her expression changed as soon as she had gone into the kitchen. She looked over her shoulder to make sure Janey hadn't followed her.
“How the hell did you get this number?” Heather tried to hold back shouting at Lemar.
“Like I've always said to you, H., you can do anything you put your mind to. I mean, look at you, you got your rich man, properties around the states...and now a wedding in the Caribbean. I take it I won't be getting an invite?”
“I'm hanging up.”
“Wait, not so fast. Can't I even wish you well? What, is it three months to the wedding?”
“You know, you've read the papers.”
“I heard it isn't going to be some big society wedding.”
“That's right.”
“So the guy is making a bit of a saving.”
“What has this got to do with you?”
“Plenty. I was just thinking, I might have miscalculated when I asked for $300,000.”
“Oh no you don't, Lemar,” Heather said loudly. She looked around again and lowered her voice. “I told you that was all; a one off payment. That's all I could get. He'll suspect something. I can't.”
“You can and you will. As a wedding present to you, you give me the same amount again and I'll go, and I mean it. That money will be enough for me to disappear off the face of the earth. Something I'm sure you'll be pleased about.”
“Please, Lemar. You can't do this; I can't do this. You're asking the impossible of me.”
“You forget how well I know you. Nothing is impossible for you, H.”
Heather hung up the phone. Straight away a text came through from that same number.
I'll be kind. I’ll give you two weeks this time. That's all. If you don't meet me at the same place, same time there won't be a wedding. When your Russian finds out about the real you! LOL! I wouldn't like to be in your shoes. LB
Lemar's laugh ran through her veins and she began to shake with fear and anger.
“What happened to you?” Janey was behind her in the kitchen all of a sudden.
“Jesus, you frightened me!” Heather exclaimed.
“I'm sorry, I thought you were coming right back.”
“I was but I had some pain in the ass call – some guy from the hospital. You know when I worked part time at City? He was always creeping me out. I don't how he got the number but he called to wish me well – he heard about the wedding.”
“Weird. Oh well,” said Janey, “at least he won't be bothering you anymore. Anyway. Idea. I've got a day off work on Monday so why don't we just hit the shops for your dress? Nothing better than trying some on, right? That way, you'll know what's going to suit you.”
Heather got up from her chair and threw the cell across the table. “Good idea. It's a date.”
Janey left a little later and Yuri arrived to find Heather out on the balcony staring out across the city sky. The bride magazines were still on the table beside her, the leaves flapping open in the evening breeze.
“Hey, beautiful,” Yuri said as he stepped out onto the balcony. He kissed the top of her head and Heather looked up and smiled. “It's turning chilly out here, Heather. Why don't you come inside?”
Heather got up in a robotic manner and went inside with Yuri. She had sat outside in the same position, just thinking about her past, just thinking about Lemar's threat. She did not know what to do. She had thought hard about her original gut reaction to Lemar's demands, which was to run away. Leave Yuri, leave everything she had been working towards and go. She shivered as she sat down on a big, deep armchair in the living room.
Yuri was removing his jacket and looking at her. “Something is bothering you, Heather. Is wedding planning getting too stressful? You know Susan did recommend a wedding planner, it's not too late to call.” He came and knelt at her feet. He rubbed her hands, which were sitting limply on her thighs.
“It's not that,” she said. “I couldn't be happier planning my wedding to a great guy like you. I'm more than lucky to have you. You really are too good for me.”
“Because I love you, Heather. Meeting you has been the making of me. And you know there is nothing I wouldn't do for you.”
“I know.”
“But right now you're frightening me. You look so lost and far away I'm not sure I can bring you back from where ever you are. Maybe I should cancel tonight's plans.”
“Plans?”
“Yes, have you forgotten? Susan is coming to dinner with her boyfriend, the accountant guy. We met him at the party the other week and, well, you were the one who invited them, Heather.”
“Damn it.” Heather lowered her head for a second before looking up to the ceiling. “It completely slipped my mind. How much time have I got to rustle something up?”
“An hour, but let's just order something. Susan will be fine with that. Unless...”
“Unless?”
“You want to cancel.”
“That would look rude. We'll order something from Caravello's. Susan loves their food. I'll find the menu.” Heather got up and walked to the kitchen in that same robotic manner. She searched a drawer in the kitchen and slammed it shut when she couldn't find the right menu. “Damn it!” she exclaimed.
Yuri walked over to Heather, took her by her shoulders and spun her around. There were tears in her eyes. He hugged her close to him. “You have to tell me Heather. Whatever is eating you up inside, it has to come out.” He held her at arms length. “Now.”
She sniffed and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand before leaning both hands on the kitchen counter. “It's about that money you gave me a couple weeks ago,” she said.
“The money for your father? I told you I didn't have a problem with that.”
“I know, but it's just... Something I wasn't expecting has happened and I didn't know how to say it.”
“He wants more.”
She looked up quickly. “You sound as if you expected it.”
“People who do that kind of thing will always try their luck again. What do you want to do?”
“What do I want to do?” she asked, blinking in disbelief.
“Sure, he's your father. Do you think another payment will finally get him off our back?”
“I-I hope so.” She looked deep into his eyes. “But what if it doesn't? What if he just keeps on coming back for more?”
“We'll cross that bridge if and when—“
“Yuri, he might keep on asking.”
“How much does he want?” Yuri knotted his brow.
“The same amount.”
“Give it to him and say you'll add a bonus if he backs off. Tell him you won't be taken for anymore money, if he comes crawling back, you'll have the police arrest him for extortion.”
“I could do that?”
“Probably not, but he might not know it. But it might be the thing that finally gets him to leave us alone. Look, I don't want anything or anyone spoiling our plans. If I'm right about your father, he'll think he's hit the jackpot by getting more than he bargained for and he'll slip away through the cracks.”
“You sure about this Yuri?” There was the sound of relief in Heather's voice.
“Positive. Now stop crying and let's get ready before Susan and what's his face get here.”
Throughout the evening Heather couldn't get Yuri's generosity out of her mind. The whole evening floated by her as if it were a dream. The only thing that kept her mind grounded though, was the lie she told to Yuri and threats that Lemar made. Threats to expose the real her to Yuri and she knew he wasn't kidding.
Just before she left, Susan took Heather to one side. She told Yuri that she wanted to quiz Heather about her wedding dress but didn't want Yuri to hear.
“You guys sit here while us ladies take to the other room.” Susan held Heather's hand and took her into the bedroom. She closed the door, crossed her arms and glared at Heather.
“What is it?” Heather asked.
“Heather, you're a great girl. You've conducted yourself in a commendable way when it comes to Yuri, all except one thing. The money. Now, Yuri just gave me instructions to withdraw another suitcase of cash, this time with a little bonus on top.”
“He did what?”
“Don't act innocent. He took me to one side while you were in the kitchen and says your father has been back in touch.”
“That's right, he has.”
“It's just that something about this doesn't ring true to me. I don't know why but I get the feeling you're playing that man for a fool.”
“How can you say that?” Heather raised her voice. “You know I love him.”
Susan approached her and took Heather's hands. “Heather, if you're in some kind of trouble it won't do you any good to start married life on a lie. Whoever or whatever this second amount of money is for, are you sure it's going to be the last time?”
Heather nodded. “I think so.”
“You think so? Do you really think it's all right for you to get married and be held to ransom like this by your father? Wouldn't it be better to have the authorities brought in and put the squeeze on him instead? This can't go on.”
“I know, I understand. But Yuri said this way was for the best.”
“Yuri is blinded by his love for you. I'm serious here, Heather. If there is something that Yuri needs to know before you both get embroiled by something you'll only regret because you didn't speak up sooner, it could cost you your marriage.”
“I understand, Susan,” Heather pulled away and opened the door. “But this is our problem and we're dealing with it. You just do as Yuri asked. This is the right thing to do.”
Susan took a deep breath and left the bedroom. She looked at Heather out of the side of her eyes as Heather held the door open. Both women joined the men in the living room.
“So, did you get all the latest on Heather's dress and the other arrangements?” Yuri asked as the women returned.
“Well, she keeps a few things close to her chest but I get the general idea. I'm sure you'll be very happy though, Yuri.” She looked at Heather who had squeezed in next to Yuri and put her hand on his thigh. “Very happy indeed.”
Yuri kissed Heather's cheek.
“Anyway, we ought to get going,” Susan said and stood up, her boyfriend followed suit.
“Already?” asked Yuri.
“Well, yes, because my boss is an evil task master and if I'm the slightest bit late that could cost me my job.” Susan made a gesture of being strangled.
“It was nice to see you,” Heather said and stood, pulling Yuri to his feet by the hand. “Let's show our guests out.”
The two couples exchanged kisses and handshakes at the door. Heather tried to avoid making eye contact with Susan but couldn't help feeling under scrutiny. When the door was closed she didn't feel relief, she felt worse than when Lemar called. She had to lie to Yuri again and it was breaking her heart.
As she and Yuri got into bed that night, Heather put out her hand to stop Yuri turning the lamp off on his bedside table.
“Oh,” he chuckled. “Not sleepy?”
“It's not that,” she said. “You and I, we need to talk.” Heather sat up and put her lamp back on. Yuri sat up beside her and stared into her eyes and waited for her to speak.
“I can't do it, Yuri.”
“Can't do what?” he asked.
“I can't lie to you and I can't marry you either.”
“Please tell me this is cold feet. What has changed since hooking up with Janey to flick through bride magazines to wanting out of the wedding? Are things moving too fast for you? Are you feeling rushed?”
“I'm feeling a lot of things, Yuri, but the main thing is guilt.”
“You feel guilty. Look, if this is about the money for your father, I told you it'll work itself out. He won't come back for more. With what I've told Susan to provide, he wouldn't be able to spend it in his lifetime. Just relax. It'll be fine.”
“Yuri it won't be fine; the money, well that's just part of it. The rest is that I lied to you and that's why I feel guilty.”
“You lied about what?” he turned is body to face her. Heather just stared into his eyes and couldn't summon the courage to speak. “You're going to tell me, so just blurt it all out. It can't be so bad.”
“It's bad, Yuri, very bad. And when I tell you everything you'll want me to go. In fact, I will go. But I have to tell you first because I love you too much to go on like this.”
Yuri shuffled around, uncomfortably and slightly pulled away. “Before you say another word,” he said. “Think about it. You don't have to tell me everything, Heather. Not if it means you'll leave me.”
“Darling Yuri,” she said, stroking his cheek. He took her hand and kissed it. “You remember I told you I was on my own from the age of fifteen?”
“Yes,” he said, “but you didn't go into detail. I assumed you had a disagreement with your parents but you gave me the impression they might both be dead. But your father has shown up so I guess at least one of them is alive.”
“To be honest with you, Yuri, I don't know if they're alive or dead. I haven't seen them in a decade.”
“But...your father? The money?”
“It wasn't my father who wanted the money, it was the man I left my family for. The man I lived with for four years before I... before I was put away.”
“Put away? As in an institution?”
“Put away, as in prison.”
“What?”
“I know, let me say it all quickly or I'll never be able to say it at all.” She took a breath, “My parents were strict, the religious kind. My dad had to move to New York for work and they hated living here. I was about ten when we moved and became good friends with a very, let's say, advanced for her years, ten year old. When we were fifteen, she told me about this party. I shouldn't have been there, I'd told my parents I was going to this friend's house to study. Trudy, her name was.
“My folks didn't like Trudy but we were best friends. Everything Trudy did, I wanted to do, too. Like I said, I lied to them, said I was staying at Trudy's but we got all dressed up and went to this party. I met this guy, Lemar Berwick. He was nineteen. To cut a long story short, I fell in love for the first time and couldn't handle any of the emotions that came with that.
“Mom and Dad told me to drop him. He was too old. They didn't like the look of him and they were right. Lemar was into drugs; not only using but a dealer, too. I was hooked on cocaine before my sweet sixteenth. My parents came home and found me wasted and kicked me out. Said never to come back until I was clean.”
“They shouldn't have turned their back on you.”
“They didn't know how to cope with me. I was out of control. The police were always at our house, trying to find Lemar's stash, thinking I was young enough and stupid enough to hide it for him.”
“And were you?”
“Not then. Not in my parents' house. But once they'd kicked me out, Lemar was all I had. I moved in with him and I did things like hide his drugs, lie and worse.”
“Worse?”
“We used to run this racket. I would pretend I was a hooker, pick up some guy and bring him to some back street and then Lemar would jump out and mug him.”
Yuri exhaled loudly. He ran his hand over his head and looked back at Heather.
“Well, you can imagine things got out of control,” she continued. “Lemar was involved in some pretty bad deals and I was helping him. But when it all hit the fan, when we got arrested, Lemar hid the fact that I was soliciting and dealing. A guy died using drugs Lemar supplied; in fact, he died at our apartment. Lemar ran but I told the police where to find him. I was scared.
“When it came to sentencing, I was sent away for possession and Lemar took the rap for everything else. The dealing, the extortion; he never let on about anything that wasn't obvious to the cops. I served eighteen months and he served five years.
“I went looking for my folks when I was released because by then I was clean. They'd gone, moved away to God knows where. I think they changed their names. I couldn't locate them. That's when I knew I was on my own. I was almost twenty and I'd screwed up five years of my life. Five years I could never get back, five years I could never erase and five years that I will regret for the rest of my life. Especially now, when those five years mean that I don't deserve you, that I'm in no way good enough for you. I'm twenty-five now and I feel like I'm all the way back to where I started.” She looked at Yuri who was staring down at the bed sheets.
“In effect,” she said, “I've stolen $300,000 from you. Not only that, these last few months I've completely ruined any hope that you could ever love me again.”
Yuri got out of the bed and walked the width of the room. When that wasn't enough, he walked the length of it too and then left the bedroom altogether.
Heather felt cold. She couldn’t even cry. She got out of the bed and changed into a t-shirt and jeans. She took down a suitcase from inside the walk in dressing room and began to pack her things. Her hands shook and she looked down at the large diamond on her engagement ring. She took a deep breath and began to work it off her finger.
“What are you doing?” Yuri asked.
She looked up and saw Yuri walking towards her.
“Taking it off,” she said.
Yuri said nothing but walked to the window and pulled it open. Heather looked over her shoulder at him, hoping he would say something but he did not look back at her.
She picked up the suitcase, turned and mouthed the words, “Goodbye,” and left the apartment.