Chapter Eight
As Meg entered the room, her arm looped through Emma’s, Simon staggered to his feet. He, James and Graham had been waiting for them for only a few moments, but it had felt like an eternity. Now he stared at Meg, her cheeks pale, her dark eyes downcast, and everything he’d ever felt for her swelled to the surface.
He loved her, as he always had. And he would marry her. She would be his. But this beginning, it would hang over them. Perhaps it would not be something they could ever overcome. The very idea that it wasn’t broke his heart.
He heard Graham clear his throat and turned to see his friend pace away, not looking at either of them. Meg lifted her gaze at last, looking first at the turned back of Graham, then her brother, and finally she swung her eyes on Simon. She caught her breath.
“Oh, Simon,” she gasped. “Your nose.”
Graham turned sharply at that statement and glared at Simon. Simon forced a half-smile for her and barely kept from a grimace at the pain that shot from the very injury that worried her. “It’s fine, Margaret.”
She stiffened at the formal use of her name and her gaze slid away as she blushed. Emma frowned in his direction, then guided Meg to James’s side and went back to shut and lock the door.
“This room has such a thick barrier,” Emma said. “At least those interested parties outside will hear nothing in here.”
Simon bent his head. Oh yes, they had already provided far too much fodder for the gossips.
“James,” Emma said softly, meeting her husband’s eyes.
Simon stared at the gentle encouragement that flitted between then. The way that his friend softened when he was with his wife. Their easy connection was deceptive, of course. Simon knew how hard-fought their love had been.
But now they were happy. He cast his gaze toward Meg and wondered…hoped…that perhaps one day that could be his own future.
“Let’s just get it over with,” Graham said, facing the others at last. “Stop dragging it out.” His hard tone and the way he separated himself from the rest of the room made Simon’s heart sink.
James cleared his throat. “Very well. Obviously the compromising position Simon and Margaret were caught in has changed the circumstances surrounding her engagement to you, Graham. Perhaps if it had only been you and me who found them as they were, we could have smoothed it over. But with Baxton with us and gleefully spreading his tale…well, that complicates things.”
“Complicates things,” Graham said softly. “That is certainly one way of putting it.”
“I think we all know what must happen now,” James said, ignoring the angry tone of their friend’s voice. “It is obvious that Graham and Meg must end their engagement. And Simon and Meg must marry.”
“And quickly,” Emma said with a smile of reassurance for Meg.
Graham folded his arms. “I have no quarrel with ending the engagement,” he said. “But perhaps you should ask the new couple if they’d like to marry. Arranging a marriage didn’t work out so well for you in the past, Abernathe.”
James flinched, for none of his closest friends called him by his title. He had always been James to Graham and Simon. Graham was clearly sending a message by saying otherwise.
“You are correct in that I had a part in this,” James said. “For which I apologize sincerely. I thought I was doing the right thing. Obviously I wasn’t.”
Meg shook her head. “You cannot take responsibility for me or for Simon, James.”
Her brother shrugged. “Still, Graham has a point. I don’t want to repeat the mistakes of the past just to smooth over gossip. Meg, would you like to marry Simon? And Simon, would you marry Meg?”
Simon jolted at the question. The answer was so much more complicated than his friend would ever know. He wasn’t even sure he had the words to try to explain how deeply that question touched his heart. A heart he had tried to hide for so long, he wasn’t certain how to draw it into the light. Or if he should draw it out at all.
When he was silent, Meg said, “I know that this scandal will likely never fully fade. But a marriage would certainly soften it. I would marry Simon, but only if he were not opposed. I will not trap someone into marriage. I’d rather remain a spinster and be sequestered into the country as punishment for what I did.”
Simon jolted at the idea of Meg, locked away in some countryside manor, paying for his actions forever. Alone. Her passionate nature stifled. She didn’t look at him now as she awaited his response to her statement, but he could see her lower lip trembling ever so slightly and her hands clenched at her sides in fists.
“I would not allow that,” he said. “Margaret, I would be… privileged to marry you if you would have me after I’ve demonstrated such a breach in character and honor.”
“So you will each agree,” James said and there was no mistaking the relief in his tone. “Then I say we need to make an announcement of the end of one engagement and the beginning of another. To say nothing and simply let the gossip grow would only make it worse. Graham, would you take part in such a thing?”
Graham shook his head slowly. “Help soften the blow, you mean. Act as if I’m fine with what was done?”
Meg took a breath and moved toward her former fiancé. He stiffened as she approached, and Simon tensed as he waited for whatever Meg would do.
“I would not ask you to do this,” she said. “If you want to call me a whore from the rooftops and leave this house without looking back, I’ll take that censure. I’ve earned it. You were never anything but kind to me and I’ve repaid you with humiliation and the implication of a worse kind of betrayal. Because of that, I don’t deserve anything less than your worst.”
Her words, spoken in a wavering but strong tone, seemed to assuage Graham. His expression grew easier and he let out his breath slowly.
“You don’t deserve to be destroyed,” he said, lifting his gaze to Simon. “I wouldn’t do that to you. Yes, Abernathe, I’ll do as you say. I’ll be part of an announcement. But I would like to leave here as soon as I can. A quiet return to London seems the best answer for everyone. That way you can plan your wedding, as it seems it would be best for these two to rush their engagement.”
“Of course,” Emma said. “We shall make an announcement this afternoon. Just a quick few words from James as you all stand by.”
As Meg stepped away, James stepped forward and held out a hand to Graham. “Thank you.”
Graham stared at the offering, then his gaze moved to Meg and to Simon. “A scene won’t do any of us any good,” he said, not taking James’s hand. “Now I’ll go up and have my servants prepare my things for immediate departure. Send me word when you will have me join you. I shall do so.”
He said nothing else, but left the room in a few long, purposeful strides. He shut the door behind himself, not slamming it, but with a firmness that spoke of endings. Permanent ones.
James slowly lowered the hand that he still held out and bent his head. Emma rushed to his side, taking his arm as he murmured, “He despises me.”
“He’s hurt,” Emma said, smoothing her hand along his back to soothe him. “Right now he is hurt and embarrassed. But time will heal him. And time will let him be open to your friendship again.”
“You didn’t do this to him,” Simon said with a shake of his head. “He will forgive you.”
What remained unspoken in the room was that Graham would never forgive Simon. And even though they had been more distant in the past few years, the loss of one of his oldest friends cut him. But he deserved to bleed.
“Are we engaged?” Meg asked, her eyes darting to him.
Simon cleared his throat and moved toward her. As much as his heart and soul ached for what he’d done, her question also lit a spark of joy in him. One he tamped down out of decorum.
“Yes,” he said softly, reaching for her hand. She let him take it, looking up into his eyes with questions, with fears…but also with desires. The same ones that had flared between them the night before and brought their lives crashing around them.
But now she was his and he could play out those desires to his heart’s content.
“Congratulations,” James said, clearly trying to brighten his tone. “I should get drinks.”
“No,” Simon said, turning away from Meg with difficulty. “We will toast the marriage when it comes. I think toasting the engagement would be unseemly in this moment, given the circumstances.”
James nodded. “Very well. Then perhaps we should talk details.”
Simon released Meg’s hand with difficulty and moved to James’s desk. Yes, details he could manage. Details were unemotional and technical. Not like the rolling feelings that currently gripped his heart.
Those he would have to get a handle on. They had already caused a great deal of damage.
As Meg stood at the top of the garden, overlooking the crowd of guests gathered there, what she wanted more than anything was to slip to Simon’s side and take his hand. His presence had always been a comfort to her, but now…
Well, now he was distant, standing next to James, not looking at her as they prepared to make their announcement to the party at large. His face, handsome though swollen from his broken nose, never turned toward her. And the crowd whispered at far too loud a rate about the bruises beneath his eyes and the way Graham stood away from Meg.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” James said, his booming voice and no-nonsense tone silencing the party in an instant. “Obviously you have all heard things today.” He shot a pointed glance at Lord Baxton, who refused to meet his host’s eyes. “And our family does have an announcement.”
“I have an announcement,” Graham said, stepping in front of James.
Meg jerked her face toward him. This was not what they’d agreed to, and judging from Graham’s grim expression, there was no telling what he would now say. She held her breath.
“Seven years ago my closest friend arranged a marriage between myself and his beloved sister,” Graham began. “I was lucky to have the chance at a future with such a lady. But recent events have made me realize that she would be better suited to another. So we have mutually ended our engagement.”
The crowd let out a collective gasp and the whispers that had been silenced by James’s words began again at twice the rate.
Graham turned toward Meg, holding out his hand. She blinked. He was smiling, but it was all a show. She could still see the betrayal, the anger and the deep hurt in his stare. Things he was not expressing out of a goodness and honor that she did not deserve. She reached out to take his hand. He barely held her hand as he drew her toward Simon and offered it to him.
Simon glanced at the crowd, which was now hanging on this display like it was high theatre. Then he met Graham’s eyes and held his gaze there as his friend placed Meg’s hand in Simon’s.
Graham immediately jerked away and stepped back, behind the families, away from the presentation that clearly was of no pleasure to him. Meg wasn’t certain it was of any pleasure to Simon either. He did not look happy as he guided her hand to the crook of his arm and they faced the crowd.
James cleared his throat. “I am happy to announce that Margaret will marry the Duke of Crestwood one week from Saturday in a private ceremony here at Falcon’s Landing. There is little else to say in the matter, so I hope you will all simply enjoy the last few days of our gathering and wish the happy couple nothing less than the best. Good day.”
He turned and motioned Simon and Meg back toward the house. Graham was already ahead of them, mounting the steps back to the terrace two at a time. Simon guided Meg up, wordless, not looking at her. They entered the parlor with James and Emma at their heels.
Once inside, Graham faced the foursome. “It is done. And I am back to London. My horse is ready and my servants will be taking my things back in the carriage in a few hours.”
James stepped forward, his hands outstretched. “Damn it, Graham, please. Don’t go like this. Please don’t. Not after everything we are to each other, everything we’ve been through. Don’t go like this.”
Graham stared at James, and Meg’s heart broke. As boys, Graham had been the ultimate protector of James and Simon. She remembered him once coming to blows with a boy three years their elder because he’d said something untoward about Simon, who had been the last to grow into a man’s body. She also remembered him rising up in challenge to James and Meg’s father when he had been cruel to them during a visit years ago. He’d gotten his ears boxed and never cared.
Now he looked at James and Simon like he didn’t even know them.
“I have two options in how I leave,” he said softly. “Like this, or in a way that would be far worse. I choose this because someday…someday I may not be so angry. But for now, this is all I can do. Goodbye.”
His voice cracked as he said the last, then he left the room without so much as a nod. His footfalls led away to the foyer and out where Meg imagined his horse was waiting.
James bent his head and turned back. Simon looked sick. “I’m sorry.”
James let out a long sigh. “It doesn’t matter now. Here we are. We should make the best of it.” He moved toward Meg and smiled at her gently. “I think it might be best if you went upstairs.”
“And what about the party?” she asked.
Emma shook her head. “James and I discussed it earlier. We agree that you and Simon should stay away today. Let the worst of the reaction die down while James and I manage it. Tomorrow we will start over. Tomorrow we will plan a small ball to end the party and celebrate the engagement. And James and Simon will take time to arrange the special license and the rest.”
Meg nodded, numb when she should have been happy. She would marry Simon in just one week’s time. And yet she didn’t feel she could celebrate.
With the current mood of the room, this felt more like a time for mourning. All the passion she had felt from Simon in the cottage the night before, all the pleasure and the connection that had pulsed between them and caused this shocking change…it was gone now.
And she worried if she would ever feel such connection from him again.