Chapter Twenty

 

Colin gently took her hand in his warm, strong one. "Kristina, my love, you cannot see?" he whispered. "Are you certain?"

"Aye… unless the room is pitch-black."

"Why didn't you say something right away?" he asked.

Kristina did not want to utter the words. I am blind again. The most horrid, awful words in the world. She did not even want to think them. They were even worse than the pain stabbing through her head. She closed her eyes tightly and prayed for the darkness to abate and for her vision to return. Oh, it had been wondrous to see Colin's face, and everyone else's, during the last two weeks, not to mention the heather and the snow and the beautiful colors.

Please God, please angels, don't take my vision from me again. But she knew they were not at fault. 'Twas Red Holme who had done it, though she did not remember what had happened, beyond him abducting her from her chamber.

After taking her hand from Colin's, she pressed at her eyelids and massaged them, begging her eyes to work. Upon opening them again, she realized they would not. Her sight was gone.

Colin lifted her hand and pressed a warm kiss to her knuckles. "I love you, Kristina. And I want you for my wife either way, whether you can see or not. Will you marry me?"

"Oh, Colin," she sobbed, her heart breaking. How could he ask her that now, at the depths of her despair? She'd had her wondrous, precious vision back, but Holme had stolen it away again, damn him. Her sight was the thing she wanted most in the world so she could see Colin and be a good wife to him. But now… "I love you, Colin, but you must give me time to think."

"Please don't do this again," he muttered. "Does my love mean naught to you?"

"It means everything to me!" Despite her splitting headache, she had to make him understand. "'Tis why I want my vision. For you. I love you more than life itself."

"Then that's all that matters. You don't have to be perfect in order for us to have a happy, full life together."

"I don't expect to be perfect, but I want my sight back. You've never been blind. You don't know what 'tis like. I only got to see your handsome face a few times… for just one evening. And now, that is stolen from me. I have never seen your smile." Kristina allowed the sobs to overcome her. She mourned not only her lost vision but also her dismal future.

Colin wanted to kick himself for being such an arse when she'd first arrived here. "I'm sorry I didn't smile, but I had just lost my father. 'Twas grief, not you, that caused my bad mood."

"I know," she whispered, blotting at her tears with the bedsheet. "I had simply hoped to give you some comfort in the midst of your misery, but you didn't seem interested in talking to me or even being near me."

Hell, why had he done that? Why hadn't he insisted on sitting by her at supper? Because he'd been angry, hurt and unforgiving.

"You're right. I was a stubborn, daft idiot," he growled. "But, in truth, I did want to be with you… more than anything. 'Twas simply that your rejection stung. And you're not the first lady to do that to me. I was betrothed once, last year, but at the last minute, she changed her mind and decided she would rather marry someone else."

"Oh, Colin. I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"I think that's why it was so hard for me. Two rejections in a row are not easy for a man to take. Can you forgive me?"

"Aye, of course I do, Colin," she said softly. "You were in pain."

His throat constricting, he leaned over and kissed her forehead. After a moment, he sat back and cleared his throat, hoping his voice would sound normal. "I've never been so happy as when you awakened a few minutes ago. You've been knocked out for four days. I feared I was losing you. You hold my heart in your hands. You are my life. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

At that moment, Anna, Neacal and Tavia burst into the room.

Although the interruption annoyed Colin, 'twas probably for the best. He needed to give her time to think. Pressuring her about marriage was not going to help matters.

"Oh, you are awake, my sweet sister." Anna hurried to the other side of the bed and kissed Kristina's cheek.

"Aye, but you need to know… I am blind again." Tears sparkled in Kristina's eyes.

"Och. Nay," Anna whispered in denial. She frowned, tears gleaming in her eyes. "You're alive—that's the most important thing. Your vision could return, as it did last time, after a few days or weeks."

"I know not," Kristina said in a dejected tone that near broke his heart, for he knew it meant she was unlikely to agree to marry him.

"You mustn't give up hope," Anna urged.

"I'll try." Kristina closed her eyes and, after a moment, seemed to drift off.

"I think she went to sleep," Tavia whispered.

"The herbal tea Deidra gave her is working." Colin was glad she was out of pain, at least, both physical and emotional. Mayhap he should request some tea himself, so he could forget the mental anguish.

He glanced aside at Neacal, who stood near the door looking troubled. Colin was certain he must be remembering the conversation they'd had a few days ago about Kristina's blindness possibly returning.

"Do you wish me to sit with her for the rest of the night?" Anna asked.

"Nay, go get some sleep. I'll take a nap in the morn while you visit with her."

"Very well. Send someone to get me if you need me."

"I will."

Anna left the room with Neacal.

Colin forced himself to focus on the gratitude he felt for her awakening, and not on her returned blindness or her reluctance to marry him.

 

***

 

When next Kristina awakened, her arm ached and darkness surrounded her. At first, she thought it was night, then she remembered her vision had been destroyed again. She pressed her eyes closed and clenched her teeth in disappointment, as well as frustration and anger. A sharp pain bolted through her head.

Groaning, she forced herself to relax again.

"Glad I am that you're awake again, m'lady." She recognized Tavia's friendly voice. She had liked Tavia from the first moment she'd met her, weeks ago at Bearach. "Are you in pain?"

"Some." 'Twas not so bad if she held still, but her body was exceedingly tired of lying on one side. She yearned to lie on her back, but knew if she moved, the pain in her arm would be unbearable. Her head, too.

"Do you think you can drink a sip of broth?"

She could hardly tolerate the thought of food, but knew Tavia would not let up until she drank some. "I will try."

"I'm glad to see you awake again, Lady Kristina." Colin entered the room, his boots clunking on the wooden floor. "How do you feel?" Was he truly as cheerful as he sounded, or was he only pretending for her sake?

Either way, her heart leapt in excitement upon hearing his voice. "Grand," she muttered dryly, but could not prevent the corners of her lips from lifting a wee bit.

He snorted. "'Tis wondrous that you still have your sense of humor."

What choice did she have? She must accept her fate once again. She had never been good at feeling sorry for herself.

"Will you help me lift her, m'laird, so she can drink a few sips of broth?" Tavia asked.

"Aye." Colin moved around the bed and behind her. He slid his warm hand beneath her side. "Am I hurting you?"

"Nay." She loved feeling his hand there, but she braced for the pain she knew would follow once he moved her.

He raised her up and the dull throbbing in her head increased, but worst of all, a sharp pain stabbed through her broken arm. Holding her breath, she forced herself not to cry out. She didn't want him to think he'd hurt her.

"Here we are, m'lady. The broth is warm, but not too hot."

Ignoring the pain as best she could, Kristina forced herself to breathe normally. She smelled the broth before the wooden cup touched her lips. Her stomach almost rebelled, but she knew she had to drink it in order to start recovering. A bit of the warm, salty liquid slid into her mouth, and she swallowed. 'Twas very hearty and tasted like venison stew. Two sips were all she could tolerate before the nausea rose up. "That's enough."

Colin lay her back down in bed and she waited for the pain to drift away. As she relaxed, the sharpest pain did subside, but the dull ache in her arm and head remained.

"I'm happy to see you're getting better." The chair by the bed creaked as Colin sat down. He did sound merrier than the day before.

"I thank you for helping me and staying by my side."

He kissed the back of her hand. "No thanks needed."

She wished more than anything she could see Colin's sweet, handsome face right now. Surely, he wore a pleasant expression.

After he drew back, it sounded as if he was sifting through the coins in his sporran. "I have something for you."

"What is it?" She was indeed curious, for she loved gifts and surprises.

He took her hand and placed a small item in her palm. When she closed her fingers over it, excitement buoyed her, for the object felt very familiar. To be certain, she turned her hand over and took the item between her fingers and thumb to feel it carefully with her fingertips—a cool metal disc with a small gem in the center and a hook on another part of it. "'Tis one of my mother's earrings!" Filled with warmth and gratitude, she blinked back happy tears.

"Aye."

"Oh, I thank you. Where did you find it?"

"In the wood, not too far from here. I only found one of them, and I didn't ken until that moment that Red Holme was the one who'd shot my father."

Her tears of joy turned to those of sadness. Imagining the devastation he must have felt at that realization, plus thinking about how Holme had stolen away her sight again, an ugly mixture of sorrow and fury grated at her. "Where is Holme?"

"Dead." Colin was glad he could give her this news. He'd forgotten she didn't know already. "He can never harm you again."

Kristina closed her eyes, frowning, looking troubled. "I wish I'd never opened the door to him that morn, but I thought…" She dropped silent.

"Aye, what?"

"He said 'tis me, but it sounded like your voice. He tricked me."

"Damnation," Colin said under his breath, again regretting he hadn't been with her that morn. If only he'd forgiven her the night before. "I'm sorry I wasn't with you to prevent him abducting you."

"Do not blame yourself."

Well, he did. He couldn't help it.

"I remember now how I got hurt," she whispered.

"You do?" He wanted to know what Holme had done to her, but at the same time he braced for the anger.

"Aye. Holme had me rolled up in an old canvas and lying on the saddle in front of him. 'Twas painful the way the saddle jabbed up into my stomach. The horse was galloping and seemed to lose its footing. I went flying off onto the ground. My head and upper body slammed into something hard. Must have been rocks. At the same time, I felt crushed as Holme landed on top of me. That's all I remember. I passed out."

Imagining the whole scene, Colin clenched his jaw against the renewed anger. So, her current injuries had been caused by an accident. He was glad Holme hadn't beaten her again. Still, he shouldn't have handled her so roughly.

"I killed him shortly after that in a fair fight. In a kirk."

"A kirk?" she gasped.

"Aye. I hope the Almighty can forgive me for that, especially since I was trying to save your life."

Her brows furrowed. "I'm certain you are already forgiven, Colin," she said softly. "Were you hurt?"

"Nay, but Ralston was. He'd charged ahead of me." Although Colin was still annoyed at Kristina's brother, he couldn't help but admire his bravery.

"Oh, saints! Is he all right? What happened?"

"Aye, he's on the mend. Sword wound to his leg."

"I would like to talk to him. I also wish to thank you for risking your life to rescue me."

"There's no need to thank me." Colin only wished he could've gotten to her sooner and spared her the injury.

"Aye, I must. You're the most amazing and generous man I have ever met. I can never repay you for all you've done for me."

If only she would agree to spend her life with him, that would be more than enough repayment. But he feared she would never agree to it. Still, he had to try.

"I know how you can repay me." His heart pounded with trepidation, for he was diving right into a topic he shouldn't.

"How?"

"By marrying me tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" Her eyes widened. "Saints!"

"Your sight or lack of it has naught to do with anything. I love you and I want you by my side either way. To me, you are perfect."

Kristina closed her eyes tight. "I'm far from perfect, Colin Cameron. But… aye."

He waited for her to explain what she'd meant. "Aye?"

"Because I cannot live without you… because I love you more than life itself, I will be selfish and marry you." Blinking back tears, she smiled.

Joy propelled him from the chair. "Thanks be to God!" Hardly able to contain the chuckle that burst out, he leaned over and kissed her forehead. "'Tis not selfish, my love. 'Tis most generous of you, for you make me the happiest man on God's green earth."

"You make me incredibly happy, too." Her grin widened, and she wiped at her tears. "But you must wait until I can crawl from this bed and put on a decent gown."

"I don't wish to give you time to change your mind," he teased, squeezing her fingers.

"I'll not change it. But I hope you know what you're getting yourself into." A trace of dry humor threaded through her tone.

"I do know. And by the way, my mother likes you."

Kristina's brows shot up. "She does?"

"Of course. She gives her blessing for us to marry."

"'Tis kind of her, but what about the council of elders?"

That was one thing which still concerned him. "I have not spoken to them yet." Truth be told, he'd been avoiding them.

She wore a worried expression. "What if they disapprove?"

"Then I suppose Bryce will find himself chief."

"Nay! I cannot allow you to give up the position."

"I doubt they will object, especially when they find out my mother approves of the union. And I believe my father did, too. Since you have agreed to wed me, I can now meet with them and gain their approval."

"What is all the excitement?" Anna entered the room, followed by Neacal and Ralston.

"Tell them," Colin urged Kristina. Since she'd been the reluctant one, he wanted to hear the words coming from her mouth.

She grinned. Though she still lay abed, she appeared radiant. "Do you promise to keep it a secret?"

"Of course," Anna said.

"Colin and I are to wed."

"Oh!" Anna bounced on her toes. "I'm thrilled for the two of you."

Smiling, Neacal gave him a warrior handshake. "Congratulations, my brother."

"I'm glad you've both finally agreed you'll be perfect together," Ralston said. "Took long enough."

"Ralston," Kristina said. "Colin told me what you did, risking your life and getting injured because of me."

"'Twas my pleasure."

"Indeed?" Kristina said doubtfully. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm well. My wound is healing nicely, thanks to Tavia. 'Tis you I'm concerned about."

"Have no worries. I will be out of this bed soon. Will you escort me down the aisle, brother?"

Ralston beamed. "Och. 'Twould be my great honor. I thank you for asking me."

Kristina grinned. "I'm happy you found us."

Colin was glad, too, that the three siblings were together. Ralston seemed to fit in just fine with his two half-sisters, and Colin appreciated that he was a protective brother.

"I think you should tell them," Neacal murmured to Anna, his arm around her shoulders. Given his joyful expression, it had to be excellent news.

Her face reddened, and her gaze darted to each of them. "I don't think this is the right time," she whispered. "They've just announced—"

"Aye, go ahead and tell us," Colin urged, hoping his hunch was correct.

"What is it, sister?" Kristina appeared concerned.

"Well, since you're all here." Anna smiled, her face bright with excitement. "Neacal and I are going to be parents."

Amid the many embraces and good wishes, Colin hoped the elders would approve of his marriage to Kristina so they might one day soon also announce the impending arrival of their own bairn.

 

***

 

The next evening, Colin, Bryce and their mother filed into the library, along with the council of six elders.

Colin had privately told his mother and brother that Kristina had agreed to marry him. They were happy to help him convince the elders of her great suitability as a wife for him. He was indeed thrilled that Kristina was improving quickly and had been sitting up in bed all day.

Once they were seated around the table in the candlelight, Ewan, his father's second cousin—and the youngest of the elders at three score and ten—said, "I hope you're ready for the inauguration, lad. 'Tis highly unusual to wait this long after the former chief's passing, may God rest his soul."

"I ken it, but 'twas a special circumstance. I had to bring my father's murderer to justice. And now, I want to let all of you know I've found a bride."

Above his short gray beard, Ewan's eyes widened. "What?"

"Who?" his great uncle, Alan Cameron, asked.

"One that his father approved of and that I also approve of," his mother said.

Alan's bushy white brows quirked. "Are you going to tell us who she is?"

"Lady Kristina MacQueen," Colin said, his gaze darting from one frowning elder to the next. Did they remember who she was? Mayhap they had not met her. Or were they frowning because they objected?

"The lass who was kidnapped by that Holme knave?" Ewan asked.

"Aye," Colin said.

"But… the blackguard may have forced her," Alan said.

Colin shook his head, but before he could utter a word, his mother spoke up.

"Nay, he did not. The healers examined her."

Alan frowned. "Forgive me, m'lady, for being so frank, but to ensure that any child she bears is indeed Colin's heir, we should wait a few months."

"She is not with child." His mother smiled confidently.

Ewan scowled. "How can you be sure?"

Colin wished to know the same thing, for he had some concern Kristina could be carrying his own bairn from their one carnal encounter.

"If you must know, the healers confirm she is having her normal monthly courses now."

Uncomfortable about the topic being discussed in such a public setting, Colin cleared his throat.

"Is she an untouched virgin?" Ewan questioned.

Dear lord. 'Twas the topic Colin had hoped to avoid.

His mother glanced at him, a mischievous gleam in her eye. "You would have to ask Colin."

His face heating, he blew out a breath and rolled his eyes. But if they knew the truth, mayhap they would encourage a quicker wedding. "Thank you for that, Ma," he said dryly. "Indeed, we have already… shared a bed, so to speak. And whether she carries my child or not, I feel the most honorable thing to do is to marry her as soon as possible."

His mother raised her brows, though she was clearly not shocked, for she still hid a slight grin.

"I'm sorry." He shrugged. "I was in love with her then, as I am now. I proposed to her just after. Anyway, the healers examined her both times she was abducted and she had no sign of being raped."

"And she is agreeable to the marriage?" Uncle Alan asked.

"Indeed. Her sister and Neacal will stand in as her guardians. Also, their natural brother, Ralston."

"And it matters not to any of us that she's blind," his mother said.

Alan's eyes flared. "What? She's blind?"

"What of it?" His mother waved a hand. "She can be a wonderful wife and mother without her sight. She is a caring, lovable and good woman. She has a strong spirit. That's the important thing. She will help my Colin as he leads the clan and, I'm sure, bear him healthy children. I'll be glad to help with the running of the castle and overseeing the servants. 'Twill give me something to do. I wish to make myself useful."

Colin turned to his mother, wanting to embrace her for her generosity. "You would do that, Ma?"

"Of course. I've done it all these years and I enjoy it."

"How is she getting on? When will she be healed enough for the wedding ceremony?" Ewan asked.

"A month?" his mother suggested.

"Nay, I think a fortnight will be plenty of time," Colin said.

His mother chuckled. "'Haps you can marry her this night in her chamber."

"That would be my preference, but she will not hear of it."

"That will give us time to prepare for a proper wedding feast," his ma said.

"We can hold the inauguration first, in a few days, weather permitting. Are you in agreement?" Ewan asked.

"Aye."

"Good. Your father would be pleased."

Colin thought so, too, as he recalled the last words his father had murmured to him—strong chief, son.

Even though 'twas painful beyond words, he had to follow in his father's footsteps and endeavor to make him proud.

He simply hoped Kristina would be recovered enough to attend the inauguration.