Reece
“What the hell?” I felt a looming sense of dread as I watched Houston storm out.
When Eli mumbled a low, “Shit,” I knew he was to blame.
“What did you do?” He’d been goofing off on his phone after drinking his beer too quickly, and Hannah and I were just ignoring it. She was venting about her last date, and I was just doing my best not to glance over at Houston. Obviously, I should have been keeping a better eye on Eli.
“Nothing.” His face said he was lying.
“I’m not a moron. And besides, you look guilty as hell.” I slouched back in the seat and just glared at him.
He finally started to look remorseful. “It got out of hand. I was trying to help. Honest.”
That sounded bad. “Did your help involve Houston?”
“Yes.”
“Did it involve oversharing about me?” I knew it was a stupid question as soon as it came out of my mouth.
“Yes.”
Hannah scoffed. “You’re a moron.”
“Eli.” It came out sad, and not as angry as I’d intended. “Show me.”
He slowly handed over his phone. Scrolling through the texts, I just groaned. “Fuck, Eli.”
He’d laid everything out in stupid text messages that looked like internet memes. Part of me said he was going to have to show me how he did it, but a bigger part was frustrated. Houston knew everything.
Everything from my crush to my submission.
“There’s shit you don’t know. He probably thinks this was just making fun of him or something.” Closing my eyes, I let my head fall back. “I’m going to have to find a new apartment. He’s going to think I said something to you guys, and he’s going to hate me.”
“Said something about what?” Eli frowned. “You didn’t say he was in the closet or something like that. This is a fuckin’ gay bar.”
“Not about that. It’s other stuff.” I wasn’t even sure what to say. I’d done my best to respect his privacy, but it’d just made things worse.
“What other stuff?” Regret was clear in his voice, but his natural curiosity couldn’t be suppressed.
Jake’s voice broke in. “He wears panties and stuff like you. And after that stunt you two pulled, he thinks everything is going to be too much for Reese because he wasn’t even sure Reece was into guys.”
“Huh?”
Jake gave me a look like I was a moron. “You just talked about girls, dumbass. How was he supposed to guess you liked guys too?”
Privacy seemed to be thrown out the window, so I just shrugged. “I thought it was obvious when I walked in on him almost naked.”
“When was that? You’ve been holding back.” Eli’s regret had vanished once the story had gotten good again.
“The first night I moved in. It was a mix-up, and I thought he said to come into his room. He was changing clothes and god, he was wearing a pair of panties like the ones Lane was wearing in that first photo shoot you guys made me sit through.” Even the memory was enough to make my cock stir.
“Those are fabulous.” Eli nodded. “Houston has a great ass; those probably looked hot as fuck. Did you see what he was packing?”
“No, he was facing his dresser. And that’s oversharing.” Fuck. Houston probably hated me.
“You two need to do more talking and less assuming.” Jake was still looking at me like I had the IQ of a turnip. “He thinks those two geniuses ruined things and doesn’t really believe that Eli knew enough to be honest about what you like.”
I glanced at Eli. “Were you?”
I hadn’t read all the texts, but his enthusiastic nod made it seem like he’d been honest…very honest. I glanced back at Jake. “Knowing him, he was probably truthful.”
“So I take it you’re a bi, virgin when it comes to guys, submissive who isn’t bothered by what Houston likes and wants to see where it’s going?” Jake gave me a deadpan stare and just waited.
I shot daggers at Eli. “Way to overshare.”
“Thanks. You guys needed a push.” Then Eli shrugged. “In my defense, if you’d said something about the whole lingerie thing I’d have been more specific about that in the messages, so he wouldn’t have worried. This really is your fault for hiding important things from your friends.”
“This is not my fault, moron.” I shook my head. “What am I going to do? He was furious.”
“Not at you. Although, I wouldn’t bring Eli home with you anytime soon. And Andrew is in the shithouse too.” Jake didn’t seem to think it was as bad as I did, but he wasn’t going to be sleeping in his car.
Some of that must have shown on my face because he started talking again. “He’s really not mad at you. He thinks they blew his chance, and he wasn’t even ready to hint about whatever you guys have been dancing around. He’s gun-shy and some past shit with exes has made him overthink things.”
“I’m sorry, Reece. You liked the guy, but didn’t seem to be doing anything about it.” Eli might have been actually contrite, but I was too frustrated to care.
“Because I don’t want to live in my car, dumbass.” Why was that not more obvious to people? Breakups went bad, and I wasn’t going to be homeless because I couldn’t keep it in my pants for my hot roommate.
Eli shrugged. “You can live in the work apartments again. I’ll fix it with Preston.” That was not what I wanted to hear.
“Thanks, but I actually like my new place, and the roommate it came with. Houston was nice and clean and didn’t drive me nuts. Yes, I’m interested in him, and he’s hot as hell, but first of all, I had no way of knowing that he was into anything like BDSM.” My voice started to rise and we were beginning to draw an audience again, but I didn’t care. “I also had no way of knowing if the whole bi thing would bother him. I also had no way of knowing what kind of guy he was into. So forgive me for taking it slow and not doing anything stupid.”
“Well, for the record, he does like you, he is a Dom, and he would have taken things so slow you probably wouldn’t have ever kissed.” Jake shrugged. “So yes, he’s pissed, but if you like him, this is your chance. And it’s probably the only one you’re going to get, unfortunately. Andrew is sorry about that.”
Glancing over, I saw a dejected Andrew slouched over at the bar. He looked actually remorseful, unlike Eli. Eli was still convinced he was right, and that we’d all see it soon. There was a part of me that hoped he was right, but the realistic voice inside my head told me not to lie to myself.
Sleeping in my car was going to suck.
“There’s no way to know how he feels, guys. Yes, he’s pissed because they embarrassed him, and he’s clearly questioning his friends right now, because honestly, I am too. But that’s not enough to base anything on. He’s angry and hurt, and I’m really not sure I can even go home tonight. There is no way he’s into me now.” I was turning into a drama queen, but I hadn’t been ready to make a decision. There was nothing wrong with wanting more fucking time before I opened up to someone.
Jake leaned in, bracing his arms on the table so he was almost eye level with me. “He won’t hurt you.”
“I know that. But he’s not going to want me around.” And I wasn’t sure I wanted to see the rejection on his face.
I sounded pathetic and whiny, but I was feeling lost. It’d been so long since I’d been able to give up control to anyone, and the only person I’d met lately who just made me want to curl up his lap and let him do whatever he wanted was so angry I’d never get a chance.
“I’m being honest with you, Reece. I know we haven’t met that many times, but I’ve known him for years. He’s a good guy and a great Dom. From the gossip that I’ve heard,” Jake finally gave a quick grin, “Because I’ve never actually slept with the guy, he pays attention to what his subs want and need. He’s probably not going to turn everything off after you guys stop a scene. He’s just a bit more intense than that, but I know he noticed you, and that he was very curious about what you wanted.”
Jake let that sink in for a moment before he continued. “You thinking he’s attractive is a long way from really being into guys and a submissive. He’s reeling right now, and he’s going to shut down as soon as he gets control of himself. If you want to see where it could go, this is the only shot.”
I hated everything about this—how rushed it was…how much of it was landing in my lap…how everything was probably going to go terribly wrong. I took my time making decisions, and I wasn’t usually the second-guessing type. By the time I jumped into bed with someone or submitted, I knew what I wanted.
This was totally backward.
Did I want to go into something like that? Would it be worth it? It really would come down to…was he worth it? Was Houston worth putting myself out there like that and risking rejection? Sure, Eli said I could live in the apartments and not in my car, but there were so many other pieces it was impossible to all pick them all up and analyze them.
“Hannah, I’m ready to go home. Can you take me, or do I need to call for a ride? I’m fine either way.” Cab, Uber…walking, it didn’t matter at that point. I was done.
“Sure.” She reached out and grabbed my hand, giving it a squeeze. “Let’s go. Eli?”
He sighed. “I’m coming. I’m sorry, Reece.”
“I know.” Sliding out of the booth, I waited for them to get out as well.
Jake took a step back and shrugged. “It’s up to you, but if you want him, or to even see where it goes, you have to do something now. If you wait even twenty-four hours, it’s going to be almost impossible.”
Fuck.
****
“Eli, I don’t want to hear it anymore.” He was bouncing back and forth between apologies and I’m-rights, and I just wanted the night to be over. But considering the fact that I hadn’t even gotten home yet, I was a long way from getting to hide.
My sister was always posting on Facebook about building a blanket fort and hiding from the world; I was starting to think she had a good idea.
The ride back to the condo was mainly quiet, with Eli’s occasional comments the only thing to break the silence. But as we got closer to my place, he got more talkative, probably realizing it was his last chance to make sure I understood he was right. “I’m telling you, the way he looked at you made it clear. He’s into you and wants to tie you up and do all kinds of kinky shit to you.”
That idea should not be a turn-on.
“Eli, that makes him sound more like a stalker or serial killer than a date.”
Hannah snorted but seemed to be staying out of it. Eli, on the other hand, took it as a challenge. “It’s only stalking and serial killer shit if you don’t want it, but you do, so I’m not worried.”
If I was ever arrested, it would be because I did something terrible to Eli. Probably right after he said “Trust me” or “I’m right.” No one would ever convict me. “That’s not the point.”
It probably was, but I was just tired and confused.
The drive home was supposed to help me figure out what to do, but I was still lost. I’d never had any of my previous relationships start like this. Were all guys this insane?
Eli – nuts
Roman – angry nuts
Andrew – stupid nuts
Jake – stupid for dealing with Andrew
The list could go on, but even to myself, I’d made my point. I was the crazy one for surrounding myself with insane men. When everyone around you was nuts, it was probably your fault.
Hannah finally spoke up. “Um, I’m going to have to side with the idiot up here. It kind of is the point.”
She laughed when I sighed and leaned back to close my eyes. “I know you don’t like it, but you’re going to have to take the initiative and let Houston know you’re really interested in him. If he’s thinking that you might not be into guys and that you aren’t submissive, then he’s got a lot of obstacles in his way, even if you ignore the whole clothing thing.”
She sighed. “Which is super hot, by the way. I’m kind of jealous.”
Barking out a laugh, I had to agree with her. “Super hot. You have no idea.” I saw his incredible body in those panties every time I closed my eyes. Soft, feminine lingerie that was wrapped around muscles and a sexy Dom; the combination was indescribably erotic.
“Meanie.” She giggled as she pulled up in the parking lot. I couldn’t help but look over at the other end of the lot where Houston’s car should be. His spot was empty.
As I unbuckled and got ready to climb out of the car, Eli reached out and put a hand on my arm, stopping me. “I’ll come up and apologize if you want me to. I shouldn’t have invaded his privacy.”
“No, I have a feeling he’s not ready to see you yet. And he’s not even home, anyway. Who knows when he’ll get back.” Or what mood he was going to be in. “Leave your phone on because I might need your couch.”
“You got it.” He nodded earnestly. “Anything you need. But man, I’m not moving your bed in the middle of the night, so see if you can at least get him to keep your stuff here until we can make everyone come pack it up.”
“So they can come help clean up your mess?” No one would question it, unfortunately.
He shrugged. “Of course, that’s what friends are for.”
Shaking my head, I got out. “Thanks for the ride, Hannah. I’ll see you guys later.”
Her smile was more worried than Eli’s. “Be safe and call me if you need me.”
Eli just grinned. “Be outrageous and do something to get his attention.”
Going to bed to hide sounded like a better idea. “Bye.”
As I made my way up to the apartment, I still wasn’t sure what to do. There were just too many options. Ignoring it all and hoping that he’d do the same seemed wrong—like I’d be missing out on something important, special. “You’ve been watching too many movies. Real life is not like the fuckin’ Hallmark channel.”
Letting myself in, I was grateful for the quiet. Wandering over to the couch, I threw myself down and stared up at the ceiling. I knew I should probably go to my room and give him some space, but that wasn’t what I wanted.
They’d all said he was interested, that it wasn’t my imagination. The general consensus was that he was a Dom. He was just freaked that I knew so much about him when he didn’t know shit about me. That was fair. Houston needed to see that I wasn’t running from the fact that he was a guy or a Dom.
I just hoped he didn’t mind the whole never-been-with-a-guy thing.
I’d dated guys. Kissing had even been on the menu with a few of them. It wasn’t like I didn’t know men turned me on. Inexperienced didn’t mean stupid or confused. I wasn’t too worried about that part, though. The general thought on that was that he’d love the whole kind-of-a-virgin thing.
Smiling, I had to agree.
Houston was controlling and a bit possessive. It would probably be right up his alley. And mine. I liked the idea that he could be the first Dom I submitted to. He made me smile. He also made my mouth water and my cock hard. Fuck, those panties. And he had more, enough that he knew I would see them one day. That had to mean drawers full, right?
I was so screwed.
Standing up, I started stripping off my clothes. “Damn dominants who make subs do all the work.” Shirt, pants, socks…everything got neatly folded on the couch. The pants were tight enough that I hadn’t bothered with boxers or anything under them, so when I knelt down in the middle of the living room, I was naked and more than half-hard.
Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes and tried to relax. Hopefully, he wasn’t the type to drive around in circles pouting all night. I did not want to be waiting around for hours; my patience was only so good, and eventually, I was going to get an ulcer from worrying.
It was going to be fine.
Houston came home every night to find a naked sub waiting in his living room. Yup, it was all going to go straight to hell. At least I’d be able to say I tried. And he wouldn’t be able to say I was straight. Stupid, yes—but not straight.
Fuck.
He had to hurry his ass home.