"Hold on, hold on," Bau said. There was a moment of silence before a loud crack. Even through the phone’s speaker I could identify the caliber of the rifle being fired. 5.56, probably an M4 carbine. "Sweet. Nailed it. Man, Sylus. I'd say I wish you could be out here at the range with Virgil and I, but it sounds like you're having a fine time over there."

"This is far beyond anything I could've expected," I said.

"Didn't heed my warning, huh?"

"I'm not falling for the client. I'm just... doing him a free service."

Bau laughed. "Fuck. More like he's doing you a free service. You said he was straight, but he's gay. You say you're not falling for him. What's next?"

"Don't worry about me. I'm just helping out a guy in need."

"I mean, shit. If you're getting a blowjob out of it, why not? Hold on, hold on." Another pause and a gunshot. I heard Virgil hoot in the background.

"Seriously, though, Bau. It's not about that. I really want to help this guy out."

"And you aren't falling for him?"

"He's been in the closet for his whole life, suppressing everything. His parents were totally against him being queer. He's never had what we had. And now I'm the very first man he was able to tell. He needs someone to look out for him, help him get on his feet, you know?"

Or on his knees.

I was ignoring the question, I knew that.

After ending the call, I paced around my room and went out to the balcony for some fresh air. I spent ten minutes staring at a single wisp of cloud that curled in the otherwise clear late-afternoon sky. A distant airplane streaked across, leaving a vapor trail behind it like a line of chalk. I went back inside and checked the time on my phone. I'd done covert, highly dangerous sniper ops that’d made me less nervous than what I’d be doing tonight.

There was no reason for me to be feeling this way. It wasn't like I'd never gotten a blowjob before, but the anticipation was extreme. I kept seeing him in my mind, down on his knees in front of me with the shape of my cock silhouetted over his face. My fantasies progressed, and I imagined the feeling of his lips on me as he took his very first taste of a man. I was eager to show him how. I couldn't wait to experience him.

I'm just helping him out. That's it.

My cock throbbed against my underwear.

"Fuck me," I groaned, dropping back onto the bed.

I'd really gotten into some shit with this. Who the fuck was I trying to fool? I was falling for Chris. Against every goddamn red flag, every warning, every reason I knew that should've prevented me from feeling this way, I was completely fucking helpless to it. Somehow, in this short amount of time, this pain-in-the-ass, bratty fucking rock star had managed to capture my heart.

But it would go no further than this. I would complete the job and move along. Anything more would simply be a fantasy. It didn't matter how either of us felt I knew nothing good could from expecting anything more. He and I were from completely different worlds.

When I left my room to meet Chris I felt the same as the first time I'd been dispatched for a mission, all anticipation and nerves. He was waiting for me in the living room, sitting on the couch with his acoustic guitar. He wasn't playing, just holding it on his lap as he stared blankly at the TV, which wasn't even switched on.

When he heard me coming, he set the guitar against the couch and stood up. He looked as if he were dressed for a performance--or maybe a first date. I was just in my old USMC sweats and a t-shirt.

"Still want to do this?" I asked.

His face went red. "I'm scared as hell. But I'm not backing down."

"Okay." Nodding, I sat on the couch.

Chris didn't move toward me. He scratched the back of his neck and tapped his foot. "Shit, I could use a drink right now." Finally, he sat down next to me.

I had to admit, I could definitely have used one, too.

"Tip-toeing around never helps," I said, and I tugged my shirt off and draped it over the back of the couch. "I'm just gonna get into this."

Chris sat very still, like a mouse trying to avoid being seen by a predator. He stared straight ahead, avoiding looking at me. Next, I pushed my sweatpants and underwear down together, and just like that I was completely naked. I settled back into the couch, taking a few deep breaths. My cock made my excitement very obvious.

"S-should I, uh... should I get naked, too?" Chris was still keeping his gaze averted.

"You can if you want to."

He exhaled loudly. "Alright. Fuck it." He stood up and stripped. First went his leather jacket, falling onto a chair next to me. Then the v-neck t-shirt, exposing rippling muscles and goose-bumped flesh. A light wisp of a happy trail ran down from his belly button and disappeared beneath a large, silver belt-buckle. With a jangle and the swish of leather, he had that opened. He drew down his fly in what felt like one tooth at a time. Click, click, click, click.

His cowboy boots were still on. With the top of his pants splayed open, he kicked them off, sending them thudding to the floor. Then, finally, he pushed his jeans down his hips, crumpling them at his ankles. He shook his leg to get rid of them. He took another deep breath and turned to face me.

My cock throbbed as I took in the sight of him. My heart quickened. My pulse was so strong that my cock swayed slightly with every heartbeat. His underwear was still on and I could see the shape of his erection pushing up the dark fabric. He stood there, still as a statue.

I got up and walked to him. His fists were balled up tightly at his sides, like he was ready to lash out at any second. I could see that he was fighting against himself and all the things that had been holding him captive.

"You ready?" I asked.

"Don’t ask me."

Slowly, I reached out and brought my hand to his cheek, touching the fading bruises there. He flinched, but his body still remained rigid. With my left hand, I clasped his forearm and moved my grip down to his wrist and finally to his clenched fist. I held it, and pushed my right hand around the back of his neck.

A tingle crossed through my entire body as I felt the warmth of his skin on my fingers. My cock pushed against his, separated by only the thin barrier of underwear. He flinched again, and I could feel his cock responding against mine.

Carefully, gently, with the finesse of a man dismantling an armed explosive, I brought Chris's lips to mine.

His lips were sweet and soft, and as he slowly returned the kiss I could sense him relaxing. His fist unfurled, and I slipped my hand into his. He'd had his eyes firmly shut, and he opened them now and looked at me. The fear in his eyes was unmistakable, but I could see it was slowly melting away.

"There," I said. "Ain't so hard, right?"

"Can I... try that again?"

"Hey. It's your lesson."

He leaned in and gave it another go. The hesitation was leaving. He was getting bolder, wanting more. I pulled him tighter and felt his tongue brush against my lips, and I met him with mine.

Jesus, I was really enjoying this. It was bad.

"Good?" I asked, pulling back just enough to cut it short. Chris kissed at the air, obviously wanting more.

"Really good," he said, grinning sheepishly.

"How the hell do you write your music when you've never even kissed a person before?"

"I've got a good imagination."

I felt his hand press against my thigh, and then slowly, slowly, it moved to meet my cock.

"You're bigger than me," he said as he stroked me. "Wow. This is... This is weird."

"Weird?"

"Having someone else's dick in my hand."

I chuckled. "Why don't you get on your knees."

He looked at me with a glare that seemed defiant, and for a moment I thought he was going to tell me to fuck off. But instead, he lowered in front of me. My heart was hammering. His eyes dropped to my cock, widening for a moment. I saw his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed.

"Damn," he said. "This is the first time I've ever seen another man's cock in person."

He continued to stroke me, milking out a glimmer of precome that dripped down my head. Then, to my shock, he quickly stopped it with his tongue. I gasped in surprise.

"Shit. Was that alright?" he asked.

I grunted. "Yeah. Sorry, just wasn't expecting it."

He licked me again tentatively, watching my reaction. I'd fantasized about this, and now it was really happening. He gripped me at the base, holding my throbbing excitement steady with his fist. Then his eyes flicked up to meet mine, and he drew his lips around me.