2.

Mark

 

“This your dad’s place?” I take the last drag off my cigarette before throwin’ the butt down on the ground in the gutter, snuffing it out with the toe of my boot against the curb. Sucks to have to pretend I don’t know her, at least the her from five to seven years ago. But she put that ball in play, now I have to run with it.

Elise looks almost exactly as I remember her. Still just as beautiful. Her hair’s maybe a bit shorter, otherwise not much physically has changed. It was so hard to let her leave the bar earlier, but when Margo barged in very unwelcome, I really didn’t have a choice. As soon as Toby showed for his shift, I hauled ass into town to find her. Not too hard in a town the size of Thornbriar.

“Yeah. How’d you know?” she asks.

“Small town, remember? I live just a couple streets over.”

“Then you should remember your place, here. Or moreover, my place. You shouldn’t be seen talking to me. I don’t know how long you’ve lived here, but I’m not well liked in these parts.” From the look on her face, she can tell I don’t much care for her answer. But the truth is, she’s tellin’ the truth. What can I do?

“Couple streets over?” She flawlessly changes the direction of the conversation. “You live by the Hollister’s then?”

“Yep.”

“George and Margo?”

I nod.

“Dave and Lenore?”

I nod again.

“Anyone heard from Beau in recent years? I haven’t seen him since—do you know about Logan Hollister?”

I nod for a third time, lips pressed into a tight line. Don’t mean to, that’s just what happens when I hear Logan Hollister’s name.

“Then you should know… I’m…um…I’m the one he was dating when it happened. So you can see why you shouldn’t be talking to me.”

Shouldn’t be talking to her? I know more than she thinks. “The Hollisters don’t dictate who I talk to. And for the record, I know what happened. You are in no way responsible.”

“Well, I didn’t use to think so, but five years down the road, and they’re still blaming me. Maybe you can call a town hall meeting, enlighten them. Because from where I’m sitting, their version of the truth seems highly contradictory.”

“I’ll get right on that.” I tease.

Couple things about our conversation to focus on. First being, well, I’m not gonna lie, it stung that she didn’t remember me at the bar, and yeah, still stings a bit now. But thinking about it, she did me a favor. It’s better for the both of us she don’t remember just yet. Gives me time to prepare, and looking at her with the way my heart gets tight again, there’s a lot to prepare for. Plus, it ain’t like I haven’t changed completely since the last time we were together. Neck, arms, chest and back covered in tattoos. My hair, as in, I have it now. Don’t keep it shaved like I used to. My face, don’t keep that shaved either.

For the second, as I said, Elise Manning is as beautiful today as she was seven years ago when she first rolled into town. Only then, despite her parents’ divorce, she still had this sparkle in her eyes, which turned them from average blue to like, I don’t know, a gemstone or something. Just her face emanated this natural light, something which brought out a smile to folks old an’ young. If she stood next to you…shit. No straight man in this town, married, single or otherwise, stood a chance against her magnetism.

Now that light has been all but snuffed out. Sure, she’s here to bury her father, which can’t be easy. Her light, though, started fading out years ago. Everyone in town knew Logan was a train wreck waiting to happen. The kids just didn’t care because he was so cool. The adults ignored the situation because he was the golden boy. Or should I say, another golden boy. Another Hollister golden boy.

She hitched her cart to the wrong horse. And then she fell in love. Love makes us stupid. Don’t I know it? But Elise—she wouldn’t unhitch that horse, even when it turned rabid and needed to be put down.

Toward the end of their relationship, I’m not sure if she had any love left for him, but if she did, it was residual. Loved him out of habit, but she wasn’t in love. By the time she made her break, Logan Hollister wasn’t a train wreck waitin’ to happen, his train was in the process of wreckin’.

What I do know, she never did what they accused her of. I knew it then, know it now. So for her to think she shoulders any responsibility—I just wanna beat the shit out of Logan Hollister. Jackass didn’t know how good he had it.

“Come on.” I hold my hand out to help her up off the curb. “You can’t stay here all day. Let’s get some lunch, then I’ll take you back to the bar. Show you why I call it Lady Sings the Blues.”

“You don’t have to be so nice to me, Mark. It will come back to bite you.”

I don’t say anything back. She’s right again. It will come back on me. But this girl needs a friend to get through the next week, and I finally have my shot with Elise. I’m not blowing it this time because gossip mongers can’t keep their noses out of other people’s business.

Looked everywhere to try and reconnect with this woman. A social media ghost. Short of hiring a private detective, which woulda just been creepy, she didn’t exist anywhere. I mean, I knew she had to live somewhere, work somewhere. Worked up the courage to ask her pops once. Elise, you’d probably be surprised to learn your dad ripped me a new one. Doc Manning wasn’t known for using the words flying out of his mouth at me that day. No one from Thornbriar could wanna know her whereabouts because say, they missed her laugh or her smile. Or her kindness toward just about everyone she met until Logan did what he done.

I guess Doc couldn’t have known how much I missed those things, because she didn’t know. I didn’t have the guts to tell her when I should’ve. No point in it, she had Logan from the beginning. And then once she didn’t have Logan, I don’t suspect she much trusted any of us from around here.

Placing her hand in mine, I tug a bit too hard causing her to stumble into my arms. I couldn’t have planned that any better if I’d tried. Her being so close, looking down into those eyes, breathing in her scent. Sometimes a man can’t help the physical reaction to having a beautiful woman in his arms. If she notices, she’s kind enough not to draw attention to it.

“We can walk from here. It’s a nice enough day.” As we start to move, I casually adjust myself. “You still like Whippy Dip?”

She stops walking to stare at me. “How do you know I liked the Whippy Dip?”

Well… I reach in my pocket and pull out my pack of Kentucky’s Choice, pull another one from the pack, put it up between my lips, cup my hands around the tip and light the end, taking a long drag and exhalin’ before I calmly answer. “It’s Thornbriar. Everyone likes the Whippy Dip. But you haven’t been here in a while. So your tastes might’ve changed.”

She seems to accept this answer and nods as I take another lengthy drag from my cigarette. Shit, that was close. How could I be so stupid to let my guard down this soon? She’ll have to remember me eventually. But not now. Not ‘til she knows how I feel, how I’ve always felt.

We get looks from everyone we pass on the way. Hers are for having the nerve to show up back here after all these years. Mine for betraying the town. And the Hollisters. Because heaven forbid someone ruffle those precious Hollister feathers. Don’t care if she’s the town pariah. I’m a shit-ton bigger than I was back in the day, and I could take on just about anyone then. That’s another change. Back when she knew me, I was streamlined muscle. Running back muscle. Started gaining when I took over the bar. Put on twenty-five pounds of bulk because drunks can be unpredictable, and I couldn’t afford to hire enough bouncers just starting out. And I needed a certain number of bouncers to keep my liquor license. Let’s face it, a bar ain’t much good without a liquor license.

Still like the girl she always was, Elise don’t let those looks stop her from walking up to the window of the Whippy Dip to order. I knew that girl was still in there, despite how defeated the woman on the outside appears.

We order two Everything Burgers and a large plate of chili cheese fries to share. With so much of our worlds in flux since we were teens, it’s nice to see her still get excited over chili cheese fries and an Everything Burger. Of course, even that’s changed some. Instead of ordering her usual drink, she tries to order an unsweetened iced tea. Well, I don’t think so.

“Vanilla Coke.” I order over top of her. Now she really glares at me. Smooth move, again. Getting too excited. Showing my hand too early. “What?” I try to play it off. Because for a little thing, she kind of looks scary when she’s pissed off. And right now with me ordering her old favorite, she looks pissed right the hell off. “This is the Whippy Dip. Everyone drinks Vanilla Cokes. Make it two,” I tell the girl taking our order, even though I hadn’t planned on drinking one. My stupid mouth getting in the way again.

I was actually one of the few who didn’t like Vanilla Coke. Don’t matter they use the real vanilla syrup and mix them on the spot. But surely she’d remember the guy who didn’t like the vanilla. And Elise, it’s far too soon for you to remember.

We move to sit at one of the outdoor picnic tables. She sits across from me so we can talk while we eat. I watch her take a big bite of drippy burger.

She chews on it slowly, clearly lost in thought. “I used to spend a lot of time here with Logan and Beau Hollister. I mean, I guess, everybody. But that first year, Logan and Beau were my world. The way they took me in. I needed them. Especially after my parents’ divorce, which had gotten particularly nasty. Then I met those guys and decided to stay here with my dad. She didn’t take it so well. I’m not sure mom even really wanted me. I think she more just didn’t want my dad to have me.” She stops speaking to shake her head as if trying to shake away the unpleasant memory.

“Sorry.” Elise bites the tip of a fry. As she chews, she double-dips the end back in the cheese sauce. “That was a little heavy for lunch at the Whippy Dip conversation.”

“I think you get a pass. It ain’t like bein’ here’s easy for you.”

“No. I mean it’s hard knowing I don’t get to see my dad. That’s a regret I’ll have to live with for the rest of my life. But this place holds a lot of good memories for me, too. Your bar, Logan used to sneak us in through the backdoor. Then he’d steal whatever bottle was closest to us behind the counter. He and I and few friends would party in the banquet room. Beau did too, until he went off to college. It wasn’t quite the same once he left. Still, this one time we were so drunk, and it wasn’t snowing, but icing out. We wouldn’t have made it home. I had the brilliant idea to call Beau to rescue us.” She giggles.

God I love hearing her laugh of any sort. Her giggle, well that shoots straight to my heart. I got the feeling she don’t do it near enough anymore. Seems like everything made her giggle back in the day. Now with that little burst of sound, her guards fall. Her guards fall letting me see that I’m right in deciding to pursue this with her. Knowing that happy girl is still inside just confirms it’s me who’s supposed to help her let go, to bring back that happy all the time. The woman, she’s still too important to me. Five years since I’ve been in the same room with her, and my heart gets that familiar squeeze. My mind continues to fill with my happy, pushing all the other shit out. I wasn’t man enough to fight for her then. Damn Hollisters. But I sure as hell am man enough now.

I want to hear the rest of her story. “Go on,” I prod. “You called Beau to come rescue you.”

Though instead of answering, she drops the lighthearted from a moment ago, replaced by a serious expression as she stares over my shoulder. Then just as quickly, she shakes her head again, to clear it like, and continues. “Yeah. And he did. He drove all the way from UK in an ice storm to pick us up.” Elise pauses long enough to sip from her straw.

“We had a secret parking spot only about a hundred feet from the bar,” she goes on after swallowing. “Logan and I had to walk it. The idiot fell, hitting his ear. It stayed black and blue for a good week. We were frozen icicles when we reached Beau. He had this old orange Chevy pickup. Rusted out fender, wheel wells and doors. Rust bucket, we called it. But that damn thing ran like a dream. Beau was always so good with his hands. Kept that engine purring like a contented baby kitten. It always surprised me that he opted for UK when I thought he’d be happier at one of the technical colleges learning how to build and fix expensive engines.

“Did you go to college, Mark?”

“For a while. Wasn’t really my scene. Old man Gallbraith who owned the bar decided to close it and retire at a time when I’d kinda lost my way. So I took my tuition money and bought it from him, cheap. He was a good man. Gave me the downhome discount.” Not lying again, I love that she’s interested in me, my life. Interested enough to ask questions.

“What about you? Where’d you go to college?”

“Well, I didn’t. I mean, I did and I didn’t. I—life got pretty hard after Logan and Beau and the town. I found it really hard to be around people for a long time, so I mostly stayed in my apartment and went to school online.

“I worked as a telemarketer for a time, which sucked, but I could do it from home, so I stayed with it until I found something else that allowed me to work from home. Set my own hours, and it paid much better.”

“So, what’d you do?”

Elise avoids looking at me, wiping her hands on the napkin and moving the remaining chili fries around on the plate with her fork. “I don’t want to tell you,” she admits. Then takes another long sip of her Coke.

“C’mon, it can’t be that bad. It ain’t like you were a sex worker or somethin’.”

Right as the words leave my mouth, Elise chokes on her drink. Coughing up liquid. She grabs her napkin again as pop spurts from her mouth and nose. Poor girl, her eyes water.

I jump up to pat her back hard several times so she don’t die on me.

Eyes still watering, once she can catch a breath, she answers. “Phone sex operator.”

Sputterin,’ I choke, spittin’ out my pop, spraying the ground because I’m smart enough to twist my head so she don’t end up wearing my backwash.

“I’m sorry?” I finally cough out.

“You heard me just fine. Don’t make me repeat it, not around here. These people already have a skewed opinion of me.”

Right.

I don’t want shutting down Elise. I want laughing/giggling Elise back. “Okay, so tell me what happened after Beau picked you up.”

Her eyes light up again with her unspoken thank you.

“The Hollister boys—hey, do you see that?” she asks, staring over my shoulder again.

“See what?” I turn to look behind me turnin’ my head left and right, but I don’t see nothin’. “What am I lookin’ for?”

“I thought I saw—nothing. I’m just being paranoid. Anyway, as I was saying, I’m sure you know, they were big. Beau, a little more than Logan, though not by much. So they squeezed me in the middle of the two of them. Even being as little as I was, it was a tight fit. Beau had this dingy Navajo print seat cover. Between the pattern on the seats, being squished between two Hollister men and the full blasting heat blowing directly on me, because you should know the rust bucket only had on and off for heat. No turning up or down option. At any rate, all that coupled with my drunken stomach—”

“You puked.” I chuckle.

“No. Puke would suggest a normal amount. I erupted. Like, a high pressure geyser. All over the seat, the dash, Beau and his steering column, Logan, the floor.”

She pauses her story to pile her napkins on the burger wrapper, ready to throw them away. I watch mesmerized as she stretches her arms above her head, arching her back, which of course makes me think about other ways to get her back to arch.

“Hey, eyes up here.” She laughs as catches me staring. But when she arched her back, her chest pushed forward. And Elise has a fuckin’ fantastic rack. I’m a grown man. Grown men have these thoughts regularly. Don’t want her thinkin’ I’m an asshole, though. But, that’s how I notice the other customers around us quickly turning their heads away.

Her story had an audience. Minds clamor for a look into her world. What with one Hollister father being the mayor and the other being county commissioner, along with both boys being lords of the football field, a look which included Thornbriar’s most fortunate sons.

And cute, petite Elise Manning got the inside scoop firsthand.

“Let’s go.” I grab up our trash and walk the three steps to the trashcan before she joins me.

“Mark, I’d like to hold your hand. Just while we walk. You have very strong hands. They look like good hands to hold. Would that be okay? I can even explain it to your girlfriend in case it gets back to her, that you were just comforting a friend.”

Smooth move, Elise. Shouldn’t that be my line? And with more spunk than I gave her credit for. “I don’t have a girlfriend.”

The little coquette tips her head down, one corner of her mouth up in a playful smirk, watching me out of the corners of her eyes. “You don’t?” She asked with an obviously fake innocence.

I shake my head no.

“Boyfriend?”

“Don’t much care for one of those. No judgment, just not my thing.” Her boldness earns her a smile back. “And Elise.” I stop to make sure she’s looking at me full-on this time. “You can hold my hand any time you want. It’s yours to hold so long as you’re here.”

Replaced is my little coquette from a moment ago. I think I knocked her off her game because she lets out a shaky breath as she nudges at my bicep.

“I don’t know why you’re being so nice to me, but thank you.” The woman does what she wanted to in the first place and links our fingers together.

Her hand feels right in mine. Warm. Soft. We walk back in the direction of her father’s house because we’ll need to drive out to my bar. We’re silent for several minutes before she interrupts the stillness by speaking again.

“Okay, I didn’t want to say this while so many ears were listening, but I feel like I should say it now. I’m sure you’re tired of hearing about Logan and Beau Hollister. But for some reason I feel compelled to talk with you.” The warm breeze picks up, rustling her hair, sweeping a few of the strands over her cheek. Elise nibbles her bottom lip. “Why do you think that is?” She asks.

“Don’t know. Maybe because I’m a bartender. I hear lots of dirty little secrets.”

What’s hanging between us is how desperately I don’t want that to be the reason. Part of me wants nothing more than for her to recognize it, while the other half hopes like hell she don’t. Not yet.

And Jesus, the lavender scent from her shampoo is kinda making me dizzy. It a smell that if she were mine, I’d be burying my nose in her hair as I held her close because that ain’t the kind of scent you grow tired of.

“What didn’t you want anyone else to hear back there?” I shake my head to clear it, slowing our pace to draw out our time together.

“I’m not talking bad about him, so please don’t take it like that. But um—Logan was always jealous of Beau.”

“What?”

“I know. Cousins—practically brothers—and best friends. But it’s true. Logan and I actually broke up for a couple of days because of it.”

“Wow. What was it about, if you don’t mind me askin’?”

“Well, it was the start of our senior year. Beau had already left for UK. He’d been fixing up this sweet Mustang. The thing was a piece of crap when he bought it. Someone had wrecked it. But like I said, get Beau around an engine and magic happened. He restored it to showroom condition. He’d brought it to school with him, storing it at a friend’s garage. When he wasn’t in class or at football practice, he’d work on it. Already had a buyer lined up and everything. Beau and I talked on the phone all the time back then. He missed me and Logan. I missed him, something fierce. Without anyone Hollister enough to keep him in check, Logan’s ego started getting out of control. We were seniors now, after all, and ruled the school anyway.” She stopped talking to take a breath.

But of all the Logan Hollister lore I’ve ever heard, this is new, even to my ears. “Go on.” I urge her.

“The week before homecoming—Beau was our standing King and per tradition, as you probably know, would be handing off the crown to the new king, which everyone knew would be Lo.

“Beau had finished the Mustang and wanted to try it before he sold it. Man, it was beautiful. Cherry red. White soft top. I’d never wanted to take a ride as badly as when I saw him roll up with the top down. Without me even having to ask, he held out his hand. Of course I jumped at the opportunity. Logan preferred muscle to speed in his cars. Funny, as he was the quarterback signed to play for UK the following fall. Speed was his job.”

“There ain’t nothin’ like it.”

“Right?” She agrees.

“I love the feel of the wind on my face,” I tell her, and notice the brief smile which appears and disappears just as quickly.

“Then you can probably picture me plastering myself to his side from the excitement.”

Yep. I could absolutely picture it. In detail.

“Logan saw us. He saw us leave. We were gone for a couple hours, the weather had been perfect that weekend, and the leaves were changing colors. I got to enjoy time with my friend without having to put on a show. Logan loved the show. He wanted everyone to envy us. I just wanted my Lo back. Seems I’d already started losing him.” She shrugs. “But he saw us come back, too. And he was pissed. That was the only day I’d ever been scared of him. Thought he might hit me.”

“Sonofabitch,” I murmur.

Her head snaps up to look at me with wide eyes and face drained of color. “Nothing happened between me and Beau,” she says quickly. “I’d never have cheated on Logan. I’d never cheat on anyone.”

Elise, you say this like I’m judging you, like that’s why I’d say it?

“So he broke up with you?”

“Yeah. Which let me tell you, was awkward. We were each other’s homecoming date. So we went together as expected, but he was hostile to me the whole time. Only danced with me for the required dances. He was crowned king, and I’d made queen. Since he’d shown up, I spent the majority of the evening dancing with Beau. I just couldn’t tell him about me and Lo. I mean, they were cousins. What if he didn’t want me around anymore, either?

“Then Beau took off back to school. He kissed my cheek and took off that night. Lo grabbed my hand and hauled me to his jeep. We ended up at this cabin the families owned off the river on route eight.”

“The family still owns it.” I offer because, well, she’s been gone a while. It might make her feel better to hear the place has yet to leave Hollister hands. “Did he hurt you?”

“What? No. Without the audience, he got real lovey, admitted to me how much my friendship with Beau bothered him because it just came so easy with Beau. He was afraid of losing me to his cousin.”

“Are you serious?”

“As a stroke.”

“I think it’s as a heart attack.”

“Does it matter? They’re both serious.”

Touché. “So what happened next?”

Beautiful Elise bites her lip, lookin’ to her feet, her face reddening to almost strawberry. “We um…got back together.”

“That’s it? Very un-climactic ending to your story.” Yeah, I tease her because I gotta hear how this ends.

“It wasn’t. Trust me.”

We stop at the curb and wait while an old Impala with half its muffler hanging down rumbles by us leaving a trail of thick, black, noxious air for us to choke on. She uses the collar of her shirt as a facemask while we continue on to cross the street, through the smog.

“Then what happened?”

She blows her bangs from her face, exasperated. “I lost my virginity that weekend, if you must know.”

“But I—I mean everyone thought—”

“I know what they thought. Because we’d been together all of junior year. We’d done other stuff. I just wasn’t ready to take that next step. Course, once I let him score the touchdown, it was game on.”

“TMI, Elise. T.M.I.”