A few days later, I’m given my clearance to perform tests. Back in Massachusetts, I never had the trouble of waiting; the board there was more efficient. Maybe it’s the California laws. Either way, until I received my clearance, I was stuck studying the files and absorbing any and all information that was written down, which isn’t much if I’m being honest.

It turns out that Dylan and Josh are the only scientists to work on the study. Star Corp is purposely concealing the tests from more eyes than necessary, a telltale sign that they think they have a breakthrough on their hands. Companies always clam up when they fear someone else will release the research before they can. They even sent me a Nondisclosure Agreement separate from the one I signed when I landed the job. They aren’t playing around.

I can’t blame them, not really. Specimen W is certainly extraordinary. His blood never shows any abnormalities after the toxins, as if his body simply refuses to soak in the serums. The paperwork says he doesn’t die, that the serums have no lasting effect on him. It’s amazing research, and the possibilities for pharmaceuticals? Out of this world. What if we can develop a vaccination against certain toxins? The implications of that would be life-changing. I don’t think the rabbit needs to be dissected to do such a thing, however, which directly goes against the notes Dylan and Josh made in the files.

Dylan, apparently thinks that immortality is a viable option. Why he thinks such a thing, I don’t know. Being immune to toxins doesn’t prevent you from growing old. Nothing does. It also doesn’t protect against outside variables, such as a bad driver, or addiction.

“When was the last time a test was run on Specimen W?” I ask Josh. Out of the two scientists, he is by far the more approachable. Dylan never makes it through a conversation without making a lewd comment. This morning he had dramatically licked his lips when I walked into the lab.

I’m normally a bubbly person, but thanks to everything that had happened back home, and now the tension with the two men, I find myself withdrawing even more. I have plans to go to the beach soon and try to soak up some of the good vibes California is known for. I’m in San Diego and still haven’t gotten to relax at the beach even though I see it every morning when I drive to work. Soon, I’ll dip my toes into the cold Pacific.

“Two weeks ago. We have a mandatory week in between sessions but when you were hired, we were instructed to hold until you started.” Josh pushes his glasses higher on his nose and looks at me. As usual, his hair is in disarray, his face greasy. The poor guy is in serious need of a haircut and a good face cleanser.

“I’d like to do one today. Which serum is next?”

Josh looks down at the paper on his desk.

“The next batch is Batrachotoxin. We’ve been slowly moving along a list. So far, we haven’t found a toxin that killed the specimen or affected him at all.”

“How much is typically used?” I had looked through the file but for some reason, the amounts had not been listed. Someone hasn’t done the paperwork correctly. I’m certain I know who’s to blame. Dylan is sitting at his desk, his feet up on top of it, and his eyes closed as if he’s sleeping. I don’t really understand why he works here, since he never seems to actually work.

“We do a full twenty milligrams.” I raise my brows at the amount of the toxin, mainly because it’s so potent. Batrachotoxin is the poison found in Poison Dart Frogs. It’s incredibly strong and will kill a full grown adult with just a small dose within an hour. The effects would be almost instant. Of course, if what the research said is true, there’s no need to worry. The rabbit is apparently immune.

“I’ll begin prepping the test. Would you mind helping? I want to check the specimen over physically before we begin.”

“Of course.” Josh rises and follows me to the containment room. There’s a chamber in the corner that is specifically used for testing the toxins. It’s made completely of clear glass, kind of resembling the little chambers they use for preemies at the hospitals. Once I’m done, I’ll place the rabbit inside and seal the doors, making sure none of the toxins can escape. I don’t like running such a test on an innocent animal, but I have to see the immunity for myself, and I plan on going to the board and speaking my case against the dissection request.

I move towards the cage, the rabbit already watching me from inside.

“Hello, W,” I coo, snapping on gloves. I don’t want any of my oils to affect the test. “How are you today?”

The rabbit grunts, his nose twitching at me as I unclip the door.

“Be careful,” Josh warns. “He’s a biter.”

Odd. The rabbit is nothing but calm as I reach inside the cage and pick him up. He weighs more than I expect, but he looks nowhere near overweight. An abnormality again not marked on the file. Perhaps, the others don’t know how much a rabbit should weigh. He shouldn’t feel so stocky.

Placing the rabbit on the center table, I start examining him. His paws are perfect, his eyes clear. His mouth is normal, and his ears are clean. Besides the marking on his leg, he appears to be in perfect condition, not a thing out of the ordinary. He’s a mystery I have the urge to solve, to determine what keeps him from absorbing the toxins. For the first time since Neptune died, I feel excited at the prospect of a puzzle. A cute rabbit is a bonus, I think, as I stroke his ears for a moment. Josh clears his throat.

I wrinkle my brows but stand up and walk towards the chamber. Gently, I place him down, giving his ear one last rub before I close the door and seal it. His eyes study me with an intensity only attributed to humans. I pause, staring into those too knowing eyes and frown. It feels wrong to leave him there, to run this test. Something almost makes me open the door again and take him out but that’s nonsense. If the paperwork is correct, nothing will happen.

Instead of stepping away, I pull over the rolling stool and grab my notebook and pen. I want to be up close, in case there is a tell I can identify.

Dylan chooses that moment to step into the room, a grin on his face.

“Oh, good! Test day.” He grabs a chair and settles his large frame into it. He doesn’t pull out a notebook or pen. He just stares, like he is entirely too excited about poisoning a rabbit. “Maybe this will be the toxin that kills the little rodent.”

“Ready?” Josh asks. He has his notebook open beside him and his fingers on a button. The serum is already loaded into the chamber. Once Josh pushes the button, the toxin will spray into the container as a mist, the most efficient way to ensure the rabbit ingests and absorbs as much of the toxin as possible.

I nod my head. The rabbit keeps his eyes on me as Josh pushes the button. There’s a whirring noise as the serum is readied inside the machine. The rabbit places his paw against the glass, and my heart gives a dull throb. The sudden urge to rip the chamber open hits me so hard that my hand twitches, and I raise it towards the handle. Just before I can grab the door, the toxin sprays inside the chamber, coating the rabbit completely. He sneezes as the poison settles around him.

I’m not sure what I was expecting. Maybe I was waiting for the rabbit to shake itself off and continue hopping around the chamber or stare at me with those silver eyes. Maybe I expected him to show discomfort at the very least. That’s not what happens at all.

The files are wrong.

The rabbit is not immune to toxins. There’s an instant reaction, a shriek from his little body as he collapses to the bottom of the chamber, his muscles locking up from the poison. I shoot up from my stool, my notebook and pen clattering to the floor at the movement. When the rabbit’s chest pumps once and stops, I whirl on the two men behind me. Josh has the decency to look uncomfortable with the situation, but Dylan only grins wider.

“Relax. He does this every time.”

“The file says the rabbit is immune,” I growl. “It says nothing about such a strong reaction. You’ve killed him!”

Josh shakes his head and points at the chamber. I turn and crouch down, my eyes level with the rabbit’s as he slowly blinks his eyes open again. His chest begins to rise and fall, his body slowly relaxing.

“The research says the rabbit doesn’t die. It says nothing about dying and then coming back to life.” Suddenly, it makes sense why Dylan jumped to the immortality argument. “You cause him this pain every time?” I watch with equal parts guilt and wonder as the rabbit rises to his feet gingerly, his ears drooping. Those human eyes lock onto me again, and I feel the tears spring onto my lashes. No creature deserves such treatment, certainly not this white rabbit. I blink at the moisture in my eyes to push it back. It won’t do me any good here.

“Don’t get your panties in a twist,” Dylan proclaims in his usual manner. I fight the urge to turn and hurt him. I run through the movements in my head. Knee him in the balls. Knee him in the nose when he leans over. Shove him away. Embry-Jones had been advocates for self-defense.

In my four years of working there, I had never missed the classes they held twice weekly. I had learned everything from Krav Maga to breaking holds to knife work. If I want to hurt the big asshole behind me, I can, but I hold my ground. “It’s just a rabbit,” he adds. I clench my fists.

‘Just a rabbit.’ It’s that way of thinking that had made me despise some of the scientists I’ve worked with before. Embry-Jones had zero-tolerance for animal testing, and it was heavily enforced. Many scientists had left because of the rule, searching for somewhere that let them test on monkeys, dogs, and any other creature they could get their hands on. Sadly, there are always plenty of options for them. The zero-tolerance to animal testing is rare.

“It’s cruelty, and I refuse to be a part of it,” I growl, finally breaking eye contact with the rabbit. He slowly comes back to life before my eyes, going back to normal as if nothing had happened. It’s miraculous and terrible. I look him over, searching for any signs of pain, finding plenty of little muscle spasms and a general look of misery on his face. I never knew rabbits to be so expressive. This one isn’t like ordinary rabbits, though. I place my hand against the glass, and the rabbit touches his paw against it on the other side, as if he knows the level of my sympathy. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, hardly loud enough for him to hear through the glass. His ears twitch anyways. “I’ll fix this.”

I turn from the chamber and storm past Josh and Dylan.

“Where are you going?” Josh asks, starting the cleaning sequence. The inside of the chamber would have to be sanitized and cleaned before we can even take the rabbit out.

“To talk to Dr. Devereux about the situation.”

“Good luck,” Dylan chuckles, his voice far too smug. The only problem is, what does he know that I don’t?

Tracking down Dr. Devereux is more difficult than expected. It turns out, the room she conducted the interview in isn’t her real office, only one used for new hires. After talking to security, I learn she’s on the fifteenth floor, but after going to the top and finding her office empty, my fury only grows. The cruelty of the tests are unforgivable. I can’t work for a company that condones such acts, but I will not leave that rabbit here without a fight. Dr. Devereux is my first route. Perhaps it’s all just a misunderstanding.

I finally find the woman in the cafeteria. Apparently, it’s lunch time, a fact I hadn’t really known because there are hardly any windows in this building. It’s like a concrete prison built to make you lose track of time. I need to start looking for another job fast. Star Corp is definitely not working out.

Dr. Devereux sits at a table in the center of the cafeteria, alone. The other scientists steer clear of the woman, and I’m beginning to understand why. She had seemed perfectly nice, albeit nosey, in the interview. Now, I’m not so sure.

I storm up to her table and take a seat, eyes boring into my back as I do so. No doubt, every pair of eyes are on us. She looks up, annoyance clear on her face, but when she realizes it's me, she schools her features to look softer. She’s great at wearing a mask.

“Dr. Hill, what can I help you with?”

“I’m here to talk about the rabbit.”

She glances around at the eyes watching and lowers her voice.

“Be careful what you say next. Your floor has a confidentiality agreement.”

“I understand.” I lower my voice so that no one else can hear. Their avoidance and need to sit as far away as possible from the woman is helping. “Not once was it mentioned that I would be killing the specimen repeatedly, causing him pain. I’m very certain I read on the website that Star Corp is against animal testing. And yet, I find that’s not the case here at all.”

“Normally, we don’t use animals, that is true,” she says. “But the rabbit is a special case. We have full backing from the board of directors to proceed however we deem fit. Your research will be the biggest discovery of the year. Why not just accept that rather than storming in here and causing a scene?”

I glance around again at the eyes. Some look away hastily back to their food. Others openly meet my gaze.

“It’s cruel and inhumane, for one. There is no need to continue the tests,” I whisper. “You’ve already determined his uniqueness. For whatever reason, your scientists are hiding all the details, only recording certain aspects of the project. In my eyes, that’s even worse. You don’t want it to get out.”

“Of course, I don’t. Star Corp is one of the largest rising labs in the state. We have an image to upkeep, an image that is more important than anything else. We’re a business after all.”

“And what about science? We do this for the science and the recognition. There’s no need to treat the rabbit as you’ve done.”

“That rabbit has the potential to treat and cure millions.” Her voice hardens at the accusation in my eyes. “One rabbit is not worth the lives of so many people.”

“Where is your decency?” I ask. “Where is your humanity?”

“I sold it long ago.” Dr. Devereux shakes her head, her tone almost bored with the situation. “As a woman in this industry, I’ve come to terms with how things are done. At the end of the day, I earn my paycheck.”

“But we do it for the science. It’s supposed to be about the science.” I can’t understand the woman in front of me, the thoughts. There were labs who encouraged women, who didn’t treat them less than the scientists they are. Star Corp isn’t like that, and it seems Dr. Devereux has settled into her role here. Nothing can be done for the woman. She doesn’t seem likely to hear me out, and I can’t say I want those thoughts corrupting more than the lab she already runs. She has a lot of power here.

“Those are pipe dreams and delusions. You’d best wise up if you want to continue with Star Corp, Dr. Hill. This is no place for a hysterical woman.”

Good, I think, standing up and leaving the woman behind. I don’t plan on staying, not at this ass-backwards company. But I’m not leaving that rabbit to their mercy. So, I bite my tongue and return to the lab.

If my morals are nothing but pipe dreams and delusions, I’ll show them my reality, whether they like it or not.