Chapter 33

Damien

Leaving my family behind after only a few short days of having them back is harder than I thought it would be. I don’t want to leave them. Not yet.

I realize as I’m loading up the last of our luggage into the rental how much I’ve missed out on. I might have known all my nieces and nephews’ names and who their fathers were, but I didn’t know them.

Which was blatantly obvious every time I was left alone with all the guys. For the first time in my life, I felt like a bumbling idiot. It seemed no matter what I said or did, they weren’t having any of it.

It’s undersatandable, though. I fucked up.

I hurt my sisters, their wives, and this was their way of letting me know without it coming to fists. Because that would have put them in the dog house.

I might have fucked up royally, but that didn’t mean I was fair game to all. Just my sisters, and I took it from them because I gave it to them in the first place.

Each one hugged me harder than the last, and then they did it again. Each one proclaiming their love for me and their acceptance of Penny. Each one promising to be the first to visit once we’re settled and in our own place. Each one trying to one-up the other, like they’ve done since they were children.

Penny sniffles into a worn tissue. She’s been acting weird since yesterday, but no more than she was when we pull out of Astrid’s driveway and head to the airport. The pack of Kleenex I gave her before we left is scattered around her and her feet. She hasn’t stopped crying once.

“It’s going to be all right,” I murmur reaching out to touch her leg. She looks over at me with a fresh batch of tears welling in her eyes. “We’ll come visit once the snow has melted.”

She looks away and stares off into the passing scenery.

I thought the idea would make her happy, but she doesn’t say a word.

She doesn’t say a word the entire trip home.

*****

Our plane lands nearly twenty minutes earlier than scheduled, but it’s late. Sometime after nine. When my feet hit the tarmac, I’ve never been happier to be home.

Oregon is one of the few places in the world that has ever truly felt like home to me. I’m not sure why, but ever since I laid eyes on the place, breathed in the clean air, and walked the streets without wondering who’s lurking around the corner, it’s been that way.

It’s the only place in the world I pictured settling down with a wife, two kids, a dog, and a white picket fence. While life may have taken a detour or two in the last few years, I was back on schedule and planning to have it all with the beautiful woman walking beside me.

“Welcome home, angel,” I speak, turning toward her and scooping her into my arms. I hate the silent treatment she’s been giving me, and I’m ready to do whatever I have to, to end it.

“Home?” she looks around the large airport, and I get the sense she’s a little more than on edge.

“Not Portland, but the state.” I take her hand and begin leading her toward the baggage claim. I’ve been through here enough times in the last few years I could do it with my eyes closed.

She throws her backpack over her shoulder and follows closely behind.

After grabbing our luggage, I wonder if our ride will be waiting, but as we cross through the loading and unloading zone outside the main entrance, I spot Rafe’s large black SUV. He’s leaning against it, searching through the crowd of people as they exit the building.

“It’s the D-Dizzle,” he shouts with his hands cupped around his mouth to applify the sound of his voice when he spots us. He drops his hands and beams at me, pushing off the hood of the vehicle, and saunters toward us.

Penny squeezes my hand, and I lift our connected hands to place a gentle kiss on one of her fingers. All the guys know I’ve gone and got myself hitched. Rafe will be the first to lay eyes on my gorgeous girl.

“Rafferty Kimball, they finally let you leave the sandbox to play with the big boys?”

“You know it,” he chuckles, reaching out a hand to greet me. I drop Penny’s hand to take his, grasping it firmly before dropping his to find my woman’s. As if she can read my mind, her hand is back in mine without any effort, and she’s shelved whatever’s been bothering her. “Glad to see you still kicking, man.”

“Glad to be kicking.” I smile and shift my attention to Penny. “Rafe, this is Penelope, my wife.”

“Hello, Penelope, it’s nice to finally meet the woman who brought this knucklehead to heel.” For the first time since seeing us, Rafe looks at her, and he smiles. “Normally, I’d shake your hand, but with the grip he’s got on you, I think it’s a good idea to keep a safe distance.”

“Please call me Penny.” She smiles back with a chuckle. “Yeah, he’s pretty territorial, isn’t he?”

“Damn straight,” I mutter, sending a glare at Rafe. Motherfucker is just as territorial about his woman. Speaking of… “How’s Daph?”

Rafe’s eyes cut to me, and he takes a respectful step back. “She’s good. Her sister insists I put a stop to the silly notion that she’s going to marry some new fool.”

“You finally sign the papers?” I ask knowing the full state of his marriage.

“What do you think?”

He didn’t sign the papers, but his sister-in-law is right. He needs to stop pussy-footing around. “I think you need to hustle your ass back down south and claim your woman.”

“Gone and got yourself hitched, you think you’re an expert now?”

“No, but I know how you feel about her, man.” Usually, this is where Rafe clams up, throws up his walls, and freezes me out. I’ve been on him for the last four years about this shit. He needs to quit fucking around and deal with the state of his marriage. “Shit or get off the pot.”

He looks down at the ground, crosses his arms, and scuffs his shoe along the concrete. “As much as I’m enjoying this uncomfortable reunion, how about we get the fuck out of here and get you two home?”

He turns and heads toward his SUV, and by the looks of it, it’s one of the company vehicles Kingston insists on having. I don’t know why when all he drives anyway is his own truck.

“You been in town long?” I ask Rafe, Penny walking alongside of me with a small smile on her face.

“I got here right after you left,” he explains before opening the rear door to load up the luggage.

“I’ve been gone almost a full year, man. I thought your deployment was seven months?” I pause waiting for him to answer, but he looks away instead, busying himself with the bags. “Something happened?”

“You could say that,” he answers carefully, and then I remember where his team was sent. He looks back at me, and his eyes sidle to Penny. He doesn’t know what I’ve told her. While I haven’t shared everything about what happened, she knows something big did.

“We’ll talk about it later.” I shake my head and pull Penny beside me to the backseat of the SUV. I open the door for her, and while she looks at me like she senses something isn’t right, she doesn’t say anything. Now that we’re home and out of danger, I plan on giving everything about who I am and what I used to do to her.

She climbs into the vehicle, and I follow behind, closing the door just as Rafe slides into the driver’s seat, his stony silence finally settled into place. His eyes meet mine in the rearview mirror, letting me see a little of the darkness he’s holding inside.

“All right, we’ll be home shortly. Meanwhile, try to keep your hands to yourself back there.”

“Damn,” Penny giggles, looking over at me before giving me a wink. She’s trying to lighten the suddenly heavy mood soaking up the atmosphere. “I was hoping to fulfill all my teenage fantasies during the drive. You’re such a buzzkill, Rafe.”

Rafe whips his head around and laughs loudly as his wide eyes land on Penny. “Damn, Dizzy, your girl has jokes.”

I squeeze my wife’s hand and chuckle. “You don’t know the half of it.”