Chapter Five

The small group of six walked on for hours. They’d finally turned east, and now the mountain loomed on the right. It felt strange to Esteban to look off at the horizon and not see it there. He couldn’t see anything but sky to the east and it sent a shiver down his spine. It was like the first day he’d been exiled, everything felt too big, too open. He shook it off though and kept going.

A fine layer of dust covered everything and he didn’t know if it was simply from time or from the concrete. Everything was the same color, a drab, dusty gray. It was different from the square and even the parts of The City they’d scavenged from. It was as if no one had seen these buildings since the world had fallen apart. It gave him a feeling of intruding on someone’s funeral, and he looked around to see that the others were feeling strange as well. Knives were drawn, and though he’d seen these men wield their weapons in caution before, this time they were held a little further out and gripped a little tighter.

As the sun started to set, they found what looked like another square. It was smaller than the one the community had inhabited, but had a beautiful, intact fountain. It had been decades since any water ran in it but it’s marble façade, in the shape of a large flower, had gone untouched by the ravages of the war.

“We’ll make camp here,” Mel announced and he and a couple of men started checking out the surrounding buildings for a place to sleep.

Esteban and Gaylen sat down on the edge of the fountain’s empty pool. The white marble had streaks of black in it and had turned a slight yellow over the years.

“I wonder what kind of life these people lived,” Esteban said, glancing around at the slightly more suburban and wealthier looking part of The City.

Gaylen took a cursory glance and then shrugged. “It didn’t end very well, did it?”

Esteban shot him a surprised look. He’d never heard his friend be judgmental about anyone. “You’re saying it was their fault this happened?”

Gaylen thought about it a moment and then shook his head. “I didn’t mean for it to sound that way. We don’t even know what really happened, why the war came. I just meant...” He shook his head and tossed a small pebble into the fountain.

“What? What is it?”

“I just don’t think we should be nostalgic about them. Yeah, they had everything, but they lost it. I’m happy with the life I’ve got. It’s all I need, all I want.”

“Are you sure you have everything you want?” Esteban said, regretting it the moment it came out. His eyes widened and his mouth clamped shut before he quickly looked away. To his surprise, he heard Gaylen chuckling and quickly looked back.

“That wasn’t very subtle,” his friend said between laughs.

Esteban sighed in relief and then laughed a little himself. “It wasn’t, was it? I don’t know where that came from. I just...” His words drifted off and he looked down at his hands. Then he lifted a leg up onto the edge, hugging his knee to his chest.

Gaylen turned toward him and scooted closer. “What is it?”

“I’ve never done...anything like this. Well, I mean, I could say that about everything I’ve done in the last couple of weeks, but I mean...relationships have to be approved in the Sanctuary, and then they’re mostly based on genetic matches. Other forms of...intimacy are discouraged, though I know they happen now and then.”

“You mean it’s illegal to be gay?” Gaylen said with something between a huff and a snort.

“Not illegal, just...discouraged. If you do your part for the breeding program, they kind of leave you alone. The point is, I hadn’t got that far yet so...” He shifted uncomfortably and then quietly added, “I’ve never really been with anyone.”

Gaylen gave him a kind, and somehow, understanding look. “It’s not like this place has a ton of opportunities either,” he said and scooted even closer. “No one cares or pays attention much to your sexuality but there’s still plenty more men and women pairing up. Reproduction is a bit of an incentive.”

“So you haven’t...either?”

“Well, yeah, but not much.” The two of them stared at one another for a moment and then burst into laughter again. When they stopped, Gaylen leaned over and put a hand on Esteban’s cheek. His long fingers stretched around to the back of his neck, gently digging in to the dark hair there. He watched as Esteban closed his eyes and then planted a feather light kiss on the man’s cheek.

Esteban felt a growing need inside that he’d never felt before. He wanted to reach out, to return the kiss more than he’d ever wanted anything. He felt blood rushing to areas of his body that he thought he might never use. Though the light was failing, he could clearly make out Gaylen’s smile when he opened his eyes. Once again, there seemed to be a radiant glow about it that warmed his heart. As he reached out his own hand, though, they were interrupted by a barking voice.

“I hate to interrupt you love birds,” Mel quipped, “but we’d better get inside before it gets dark. We don’t know who or what might be lurking around here at night.”

Gaylen cleared his throat and nodded. “He’s probably right. We should all stick together and get inside.”

Esteban’s disappointment was palpable but he agreed and followed the man into the building the others had picked out. He could see the dark skinned woman trying not to giggle and he flashed her a sarcastic smile. The others had already gotten a fire going, and two had staked out a claim on the far side. They’d taken blankets out of their large packs and were using the packs themselves as pillows.

“Get some rest,” Mel said to the group. “We have just as long a walk tomorrow and then the trek home. Be sure to eat something, too.”

Gaylen had brought more rations, including a mix of dried wild berries they’d found the last summer in the foothills. “Here,” he said, offering a small handful to Esteban. “I think we’ll be able to grow these too once we figure out where to put them. They grow on large bushes. I don’t think they’ll make it in pots.”

Esteban knew from his school lessons that plenty of the berries from the Old World had been poisonous. He didn’t want to know what the process of elimination had cost them. “You have checked them, right?” he asked, hoping it didn’t sound like an accusation.

“You mean, will they kill you?” Gaylen replied with a chuckle. “I told you, we avoided anything that looked like it might be poisonous.”

Esteban nodded. “That’s right, you had the books.” He shook his head, feeling like an idiot, but if Gaylen was insulted, he didn’t let on. He took one of the berries, tentatively, and placed it in his mouth. It was sweet but also tart, the flavor concentrated by the drying process. He squinted a bit, his mouth puckering, and then heard his friend laughing.

“It takes some getting used to,” Gaylen admitted. “Try it with the jerky. The saltiness helps cut some of the tart.”

He wasn’t sure about mixing meat and fruit, but it turned out to be a pleasant contradiction. They ate conservatively, sipping at their water canteens, here and there as well, and then decided it would be best to try and get some sleep. It was the first time since that first night above ground that Esteban had truly slept out in the open. Small worries like the campfire getting out of hand and burning them alive kept him from falling asleep, along with the longing his body felt for Gaylen. Eventually, though, his own exhaustion won out, and he found himself drifting off.

The next day, they were all up early, moving out as soon as the sun began to rise. Esteban hadn’t had the opportunity to really watch a sunrise. Though he’d been out as it rose before, the buildings around the square had blocked a lot of the display. Now, with all of the buildings being single story, and the suburban streets stretching all the way to the wilderness beyond, he could see the bright orange disk of the sun as it came up over the horizon. A few, thin clouds dotted the sky, reflecting the orange light in shades of gray and purple.

Esteban gasped, a slight breeze blowing his dark hair back from his forehead. After a moment, Gaylen appeared at his side, and held his pack up to him. Esteban took it, absently, and then looked over at his friend. The glow of the sunrise reflected on the man’s face, dancing off the blond hairs of his stubble and in his bright blue eyes.

“Ready to go?” Gaylen asked.

“Yeah,” Esteban said breathlessly. He put on his pack and followed the others as they moved deeper into the neighborhood. They were all quiet for a moment, the silence deep but not eerie. When the sun got a little higher and the moment passed, he asked, “These were people’s houses, weren’t they?”

Gaylen nodded. “We think so.”

Houses were something else Esteban had never seen other than in books and vids. The Sanctuary was a vast, underground structure, all connected, with no one separated. People lived in small, one room pods, just enough space to cover their needs. If someone had a family, they were given more than one bedroom, but even that was rare as children spent most of their lives being raised by the Sanctuary. The entire area was one no one had ever explored, so they spent a while simply going over the territory and updating the map.

After a while, Mel held up his hand. “All right, let’s go ahead and search the street behind us and then meet back here. Remember, none of us have been here before so let’s be careful. We have no idea what we might find.”

The group broke into teams of two and started going into the buildings. Esteban and Gaylen stuck together and went to the last house on the block. They opened the door cautiously, as if something might jump out at them.

“What did he mean?” Esteban asked. “About having no idea what we might find.”

Gaylen shrugged as if it were no big deal, though Esteban could sense that the man was simply trying to keep him from worrying. “There used to be other people in The City. Just in small pockets. We had no idea who they were, maybe other people survived the war, or maybe they were early refugees from the Sanctuary.”

“Were they dangerous?”

“They were desperate. We haven’t seen any of them in a long time, though.” Gaylen paused for a moment and then added, “Plus, there are animals out here bigger than our dogs.”

Esteban thought about the dogs that roamed the square and went out with the hunting parties. They seemed plenty big for someone who’d never seen a real animal before, and the thought that there was something even bigger, and probably more dangerous, made him gulp. The thought was soon pushed to the back of his mind, though, as they stepped into the house. He wasn’t sure what to expect, but the first thing he saw was a low table covered in figures of some kind. He waved for Gaylen to follow and then stepped over to the table and crouched down. The figures were made of wood, some of them shaped to look vaguely human and some to look like animals. Esteban reached out his hand, brushing the dust away. Underneath, the wood had been sanded ultra-smooth and stained a dark lush brown.

“They’re beautiful,” Esteban breathed.

Gaylen nodded. “They are. Unfortunately, they aren’t all that useful, and we only have so much room in our packs.”

Esteban frowned, feeling disappointed, but then he thought back to the first time he saw Mother Rani. “I know there’s room for beauty in your lives, I’ve seen it. Beauty wasn’t something anyone thought about in the Sanctuary.”

Gaylen smiled and hung his head sheepishly. “Where are you going to put one of those in your tent?”

“I don’t know. We could decorate the greenhouse.”

His friend looked at him from under heavy eyelids and then lifted his head again. “That’s not a bad idea. I’m hoping that the greenhouse becomes a community place anyway. Might be nice to have it look like something. Okay, but just the small one or Mel will have our asses.”

Esteban grinned and carefully brushed off what looked like a tiny elephant. Then he packed it away and stood back up.

“You can’t be finding something you want in every room, though,” Gaylen teased.

Esteban laughed and then the two of them moved on. He glanced around the room, wondering what purpose it served. There were no beds, tables one could really sit at, or kitchen appliances. The two of them stepped through an open doorway and into what had to be the kitchen.

Gaylen grinned and rushed over to the cabinets. “If we’re lucky, there might still be something here. Don’t mess with anything other than the canned goods and stuff sealed in plastic.”

“I know, I’ve done this, remember,” Esteban answered, rolling his eyes.

“Oh, yeah,” his friend answered with a chuckle and then tossed him a can of preserved meat.

He packed it away next to his elephant and then began searching himself. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much else to find so he left Gaylen to it and moved on to the rest of the house. He was curious to see the rest. A few minutes later, he stood in the doorway of one of the bedrooms. They were almost as large as his pod in the Sanctuary had been, and for a moment, he could only stare. Then his brain shifted to the new life he was living, his new home and community. He stepped into the room, his eyes moving from the bed to the closet. There were a few clothes hanging there, most of them moth eaten or otherwise ruined by time. He pushed away the disappointment and moved on to the dresser. It was brimming with clothes, all of them in perfect shape.

“Gaylen!” he called out, his voice full of glee. When the man came running, he held up a handful of t-shirts. “Clothes. There might be some we can use in the closet too. And look at the bed!” There was a huge bedspread that still looked to be in good shape. He stripped it back to what looked like brand new sheets.

The two of them gathered a few of the clothes and stuffed them in their packs. Then Gaylen said, “We’ll tell Mel and he’ll mark it on the map. Then another team will come out later to gather the rest of the cloth. It’s too much for us to carry,” before they walked back out to the street.

They were the first to emerge, which gave them hope that the others were finding more food. When Mel and the dark-skinned woman stepped out of the first house, Gaylen waved and walked toward them. It only took a moment, though, for him to notice that Esteban wasn’t with him. He turned back, his eyes widening, and his breath caught in his throat.

Esteban had stepped out the door behind Gaylen and turned to look at what appeared to be a car sitting in the backyard. Vehicles were something he was at least familiar with considering the cart system the Sanctuary used for people to more quickly cover the vast tunnel systems. He wondered if a car would be useful to the community, making it easier and quicker to make supply runs, for instance. Before he could mention it to Gaylen, though, he caught movement out of the corner of his eye. He slowly turned his head to look and saw something much larger than any of the hunting dogs.

He had no frame of reference for something like this, and though his brain was telling him to run, he found himself frozen to the spot. He was breathing heavy, and thought he might be whimpering, but it was hard to tell over the rushing of blood in his ears. He wanted to turn to Gaylen, to scream for help, or even tell the man to get away, but he couldn’t take his eyes off the creature. It was tan, with a long, lithe body, and large head. His eyes focused on the teeth, and even if the other features hadn’t screamed predator to him, the teeth would have left no doubt. He felt sure he was going to die, but as the creature leapt from the backyard and ran toward him, he heard yelling. It sounded very far away though, like something from a dream.

“Lion!” Gaylen yelled out and ran for Esteban. His mind reeled, realizing that he’d come to think of the newcomer as the man he loved. They’d never even had a chance to explore the idea, and now it looked like he might lose him before they could. He could see Mel running out of the corner of his eye but he knew the man would never reach them in time. He watched in horror as the cat leapt again and knocked Esteban to the ground. He pumped his legs harder, running at full speed as he slammed his body into the lion’s.

The lion fell to the ground, but he thought the animal was more surprised than hurt. It turned toward him, ears pinned back, and a snarl on its face. He had no idea what to do now. He only had a small knife, used more for cutting plants or skinning small animals. He’d have to be so close to the lion to use it that he’d probably get killed in the process. The lion whipped out a paw in a threat display and inched closer. Just as it looked like it was about to pounce again, though, a primordial yell came from behind Gaylen and Mel rushed forward with his much bigger hunting knife. Gaylen had always thought of it as more of a short sword, and Mel wielded it like a knight of old. A few moments later, with little more than a scratch to himself, the old hunter had killed the big cat.

Gaylen was pulled from his reverie by the sound of Esteban moaning. He quickly knelt down beside the man, and he gulped at the sight of his friend’s chest. Long gashes of ripped flesh crossed from one side to the other where the lion had knocked him down. They weren’t horribly deep, but enough to cause major damage to the skin and a lot of bleeding.

Esteban opened his eyes but his vision was blurred. He could see a shape hovering over him, and for a moment, thought it was the lion attacking him. He yelled out and flailed his arms but something caught them and kept him from moving. Then he heard a voice. He shook his head, his vision clearing, and saw that it was Gaylen who was hovering over him. His face was so full of unaccustomed worry that Esteban wanted to reach out and caress his cheek, to tell him it was all right. Somehow, he knew it wasn’t though.

Gaylen tried to smile but he could tell by the look on the other man’s face that it wasn’t working. “The cat’s dead now,” he said instead. “You’re safe.” Then he turned to Mel and the others who’d come running during the commotion. “We’ve got to stop the bleeding,” he said, his voice rising in pitch with panic. “We’ve got to get him back to the square.”

Mel held up his hand, having already wrapped his arm where the lion had scratched it. “One thing at a time. Let’s worry about the bleeding. The square’s over a day’s walk from here, remember?”

Gaylen nodded and quickly unpacked the t-shirts they’d found in the house. He handed one to the dark-skinned woman, who sometimes acted as a make-shift medic, and the two of them quickly tore the shirts into strips. Then Gaylen grabbed a wad of them and pressed them onto Esteban’s chest. He winced when the man groaned, but didn’t let up the pressure.

When the strips were soaked through, he gathered some more and said, “Roma, press here for me.”

As the woman took his place, Gaylen quickly stripped the pack off his back and dug around one of the outside pockets. Inside were small leather pouches. He looked through them until he found the one he wanted and then untied it to reveal a large wad of dried herbs. He dumped it into his hand and then poured a little water onto his palm to create a poultice. Then he gently pushed Roma away and applied the poultice to Esteban’s wounds. They were still bleeding, but not heavily enough to wash the herbs away. Then he took the last of the clean strips and pressed them onto the man’s chest.

“That should stop the bleeding,” he said, though his voice wasn’t as confident as he would have liked it to be.