Butterflies in my stomach; they were there last night in Caleb's apartment. I had wanted him to kiss me so badly. The things that he had said to me—the way he looked at me so intensely, like he had meant every word—it had my heart and my head reeling. Everything I felt for him in high school came back in those moments and was amplified tenfold. It must have been the alcohol.

Thankfully, I was so physically and emotionally exhausted that I was able to pass out once I came home without dwelling on it too much. Now that I'm awake, though...Shouldn't I be thinking about what happened at the sex store—almost getting raped. That was the most traumatic experience of my entire life. Yet here I am thinking about Caleb instead.

What in the hell is wrong with me?

He has a girlfriend. I have a boyfriend. And even if we were both single, it would never happen. I'm sure he doesn't think of me like that. I'm sure he was just being nice.

I really need to focus on making sure that our friendship can work. With that in mind, I go over to his place to offer to take him out to breakfast.

“Are you working today?” I ask as soon as he opens the door to me. Thankfully, the butterflies from last night are gone. I had half expected to feel them when I laid eyes on him this morning. But there's nothing.

“I'm not hungover, so yeah.”

“Aw.” I sulk.

“Why? What's up?”

“I was going to take you out to breakfast to pay you back for rescuing me last night.” I rock on my heels.

“I didn't rescue you, but I also won't turn down free breakfast.” He smiles.

The mood feels tense between us as we sit across from each other at the diner down the road. I know that it was all because of the alcohol, but things got a bit awkward last night. I need to smooth them over by showing more interest in his relationship.

“Can I see a picture of your girlfriend?” Why did I just ask that? If she's prettier than me, it's going to kill me inside.

Caleb's jaw clenches as he stares down at his phone.

“What's wrong?” I ask, wondering why he's hesitating.

“You don't need to see her.” He glances away.

“Why not?”

Caleb chuckles at me, propping his elbows up on the table. “You sure are nosy.”

“I'm just curious is all.” I take offense to his comment. “Is it weird to want to know about the girl that my best friend is dating?”

“I suppose not. But I'd rather keep things private.”

“Why? You don't want me to ever meet her?” I'm not sure how I would feel about meeting her, but I'd like to think that Caleb is comfortable enough with me to introduce us.

“Is it necessary for you to meet her?” He raises an eyebrow.

“I just want to see what type of woman could stand to be with you,” I tease him.

“The type of woman that doesn't like dating douchy rich guys,” he retorts playfully.

“Hey. I would rather date someone rich than someone broke.” I fold my arms over my chest. “I bet you take her out to Wendy's for dinner.”

“I do. And she loves it. I let her get all of the dollar burgers she can eat.” He smirks.

“Oh, how spoiled she must feel.” I roll my eyes at him. “Seriously, though, you've told me almost nothing about her. Is she younger? Older? What does she do for a living?”

“None of your business.” He looks up at the ceiling as if trying to ignore me.

“Does she even exist?” I narrow my eyes at him. He's being so vague that it's making me suspicious.

“Of course she does.” He quirks his head back. “Don't you hear us at night when we're fucking?”

That shuts me up. The thought of Caleb with any random woman stings.

“Well, if she's not dating you because of money, I hope she's not just using you for sex.” I try to keep the mood light despite what I'm feeling inside. If we're going to preserve our friendship, these are conversations that I'm going to have to get used to having with him.

“Ha! Like it actually works that way.”

My smile fades as I lose the battle to my sinking mood. “I just don't want to see you get hurt.”

“Have I said anything to indicate that I'm going to get hurt?”

“No.” I shake my head. “Still.”

“Then don't worry about it. My relationship is none of your concern.”

But it is, though. Because next to Peter, Caleb is the most important person to me in this entire city.

* * *

“Have you ever seen Caleb's girlfriend at the gym with him before?” I ask Becky the next day at work. She's been to the gym far more than I have lately, and I know that Caleb spends copious amounts of time there. It would make sense that his girlfriend would come to visit him.

“No." She shakes her head. "Why?”

“I'm just curious.”

“Is she pretty?”

“I don't know,” I reply hesitantly.

“What do you mean you don't know? Haven't you met her before?” Becky gives me a queer look.

“I haven't.” It's almost embarrassing to say. I claim to be close to Caleb, yet I've never met his girlfriend.

“That's kind of odd,” she admits.

“Has he ever talked to you about her before?”

“No.”

“It is odd.” I furrow my brow. “His Facebook status is still set to single, too.”

Becky laughs.

“What?” I knit my brow at her.

“You sound like a stalker.” She grins.

“What are you talking about?”

“You like him, don't you?”

“I do not!” My mouth falls open.

“Then why do you care so much about his girlfriend?” It's obvious she doesn't believe me.

“Because he's my closest friend. You'd figure he'd introduce me to her.” I screw my face.

“Well, he would definitely introduce her to you before me. And I haven't seen her at the gym.” She opens the data entry program to start work for the day.

“Don't you think that's weird, though? He spends so much time at the gym. Surely, she would have come in at some point.”

“It's not like I'm there all the time. Speaking of which, you should come with me today. If you're so keen on spying on Caleb, maybe she'll be there.”

“Maybe I will go.” Maybe I'll get lucky and his mystery woman will show up.

My hatred towards Becky seems to slowly be waning. That coupled with my curiosity prompts me to meet her at the gym after work. Caleb isn't there, and I'm only mildly disappointed about it. In truth, I need to get back on a regular workout routine. Since dating Peter, I haven't put much time into improving my physical fitness.

“It's kind of sad that Caleb isn't here,” Becky says as she leads me to the thirty-minute circuit course. “He may have a girlfriend, but he still makes for some nice eye candy.”

I grunt in reply. It's not like I can agree with her. I'm dating Peter.

She shows me what Caleb taught her and then we get started. It's nice having someone to workout with. It definitely motivates me.

“You wouldn't be looking for a roommate by any chance, would you?” Becky asks me towards the end of our workout.

“No. Why?”

“Because I want to get out of the apartment I'm in now. My current roommate keeps stealing my clothes and cosmetics. I've about had it with her.” She climbs onto the back extension machine for her final set of reps.

“That sucks.” I frown. “Can't you just lock your stuff away?”

“We share a one bedroom apartment. It's dorm style. She's on one side of the room. I'm on the other. We split closet space. It's not like I can lock her out of my half of the closet.” Becky changes the weight setting on the machine before grabbing the bar and pulling back.

“Doubly sucky.” I don't know what else to tell her.

“You live in a one bedroom, too. Right?”

“Yeah.” I wait for the light to turn green before I start doing my last round of cardio step ups.

“What size is your bed? We could probably have a similar set up.”

“That's assuming I'll let you move in with me.” I glance back at her.

“Just think of how much fun it would be.” She grunts as she finishes her set and lets go of the bar. “Two young girls living together. We could be like sisters.”

“I have sisters. More than I need.” I think about my siblings back home.

“Well then, think about the money you'll save.” She wipes the sweat off of the back of her neck with a towel.

That's a more appealing thought. I could definitely use the extra money now that I'm dating Peter. When I was single, it didn't really matter because all I had to worry about was paying rent, buying gas for my car, and putting food in my belly. Now...

My hand brushes the necklace that Peter gave me. I still need to pay him back for so many things.

The light turns red, and I sigh in relief that our workout is finally over. Lifting weights is challenging but rewarding. I think I like it.

“Thanks for showing me all of that,” I tell Becky as we go to grab our bottles of water before heading to the locker room.

“No problem. Now, you just need to be consistent with it. It won't do any good to do it once and stop. You should start coming here with me regularly if you can find time around dating Peter.”

It's not a bad idea. She is starting to become a lot more pleasant, but that might just be because she needs something from me.