The house was quiet around me Thursday night, so when my phone chimed, it made me jump. I looked at the screen to see a calendar notification. Date with Blaire to go over Stanford packet. I had almost forgotten. I wondered if she remembered. I sent her off a quick confirmation text and got her answer back almost immediately: Just got my reminder. Do you want to pick me up?
Yes. See you in a sec.
I stood from my desk and made my way down the hall, listening intently. The television was on in the living room, but I heard my parents’ low voices on top of it. My mom laughed at something my dad said. I leaned against the wall with a smile. This was good. So good.
I walked into the living room. “I’m going out with Blaire. Is that okay?” I glanced back and forth between the two of them. They sat close on the couch.
Dad looked at Mom and some silent message was communicated in that look. Then she said, “That’s fine.”
“Thanks.” I lingered for a few moments, not wanting to leave the rare scene.
“Was there something else?” my dad asked.
“No. I just … ” I bent down and hugged them, one arm around my dad and the other around my mom. “Thanks.”
They both laughed and hugged me back.
I showed up at Blaire’s front door with a pack of Sour Patch Watermelons and the Stanford package she’d put together. I knocked. Her mom answered.
“Hi, Maddie. Let me grab Blaire for you. I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“I know. I’ve been busy.”
“You girls are always so busy. Congratulations on the lottery win, by the way.”
“Thank you.” Was I supposed to say something more after that line? I still had no idea how to respond to that. Thank you made it seem like I had earned it somehow.
She ushered me inside, then left me standing in the entryway.
Blaire arrived a few minutes later. “I’m still not used to your hair like that.”
I ran a hand through it. “Me neither.”
She pointed at the pack of candy I held. “Are those for me?”
“Yes. I’m bribing you because I was a flake last night.”
She smiled. “You don’t need to bribe me, Maddie. You’re my best friend.”
I handed her the candy, anyway. “I know.”
She freed a sweater from the hook beside us and slid on a pair of flip-flops. “Let’s go.”
In the car, Blaire pulled the seat belt across her chest. “Wow, fancy.”
“It’s just a seat belt.”
“No, I mean the car. There are so many lights and buttons.”
“I know, I feel like it’s spying on me sometimes and is going to take over my life.”
Blaire was quiet for three counts, then she let out a burst of laughter. “You are still the biggest nerd.”
“I know!” I picked up her Stanford pack and fanned her with it. “So where are we doing this?”
“Starbucks?”
I tried to mentally calculate how many classmates would be at Starbucks.
“Oh, right,” Blaire said, reading my mind like she always seemed to do. “My friend has become famous.”
“Have not.”
“If not now, surely after your big yacht party tomorrow.”
“Our big yacht party,” I said.
“I’ve done all of nothing.”
“You gave me almost all the ideas for food to serve.”
“True. Those are pretty awesome ideas, too.” She watched street signs as we passed by. “Go to the one on Seventeeth. You’re right, we won’t get anything done at ours.”
The one she was referring to was only a few miles farther, but it would make a difference.
I pulled into the parking lot and we got out of the car.
After ordering, we sat at a small table in the corner while we waited for our drinks to be called.
“So,” I said, placing both palms flat on the table. “Do you have talking points?”
She smiled. “You know I do. Open to page one, please.”
I rolled my eyes.
“I’m serious.”
“I know you’re serious, and that’s why I love you.”
“Then that’s the first point. You love me so much that you can’t bear the thought of us going to two separate colleges next year.”
“You’re right.”
“I am?”
“Yes.” I groaned. “Blaire, I want to go to college with you. It’s just hard, you know?”
“I don’t know.”
“My parents are finally doing better and I hate to disrupt that with a major life change.”
“Seriously? You need to stay if they’re not doing well and stay if they are?”
“I’ve just always had this image of me in a dorm room an hour away so that I can visit them whenever they need me.”
“Even if it’s not the best option for you?” She pointed at me. “For you, Maddie. Not for your parents or your brother or anyone else. For you.”
“But I’m connected to those people you want me to view as separate entities. We are all intertwined.”
“You can’t be forever.”
“Isn’t that what family is?”
“But you have to live your own life at some point.”
“I know.” I patted the papers. “This was very persuasive.”
“I hope so. That thing took me a week to put together. Stanford should hire me to do their pamphlets.”
I giggled.
“Another point,” she said, tapping the page in front of me. “Money. You always said an academic scholarship for Stanford was going to be so much harder to get than one for UCLA. But you don’t need to worry about that anymore. You have money now. You don’t need a scholarship.”
“That’s true.”
“It’s basically Ivy League,” Blaire said. “You worked your tail off for the last four years. You deserve to go to the school you earned.”
My heart gave a jump. It would be pretty amazing to go to Stanford. I had worked hard. I’d always known the possibility of earning a scholarship there was next to none because the competition would be so high. That was one of the many reasons I’d never truly let myself consider it. But now …
“Maddie!” The barista called my name from behind the counter.
“I’ll go get our drinks.” I stood up and went to the counter, leaving Blaire plotting behind me. I was sure she’d have some new angle by the time I sat down. I picked up our drinks and turned, nearly running cups-first into someone. I saved our drinks and his shirt just in time.
“Sorry,” I said.
“Maddie?”
I met his eyes. “Seth? Hi!” In my excitement I hugged him with my hands full of drinks.
“I thought I heard them say your name, but I didn’t recognize you at first. You’re not wearing your glasses. And you’re blond!”
“I’m not. And … yeah, I am.”
“It looks good.”
“Thanks. What are you doing here?”
“I told you I study at Starbucks.” He smirked at me like I had wound up here at his Starbucks on purpose.
“Oh, right. I’d forgotten.” Out of the corner of my eye I saw Blaire, her eyebrows raised. “Come meet my friend.”
He followed me back to our table where I set the drinks down.
“Blaire, this is Zoo Seth. Seth, this is my best friend, Blaire.”
Seth smiled. “We’re still going with Zoo Seth?”
“I needed to give her context.”
“Because I’ve heard stories about you. Now I have a face,” Blaire said.
“I’m scared to hear what stories,” Seth replied.
I waved my hand through the air. “Oh, you know, the classics, dentures and vomit and that time you let the macaw out of the cage.”
He cringed. “You’re going way back now. And for the record, the cage opened itself.”
I spun a chair from another table across the floor until it was between us, then patted it. “Have a seat.”
Seth pointed back to the other side of the store. “I should go grab my stuff. I’ve taken over a booth with my books. I’ll be right back.”
When he left I quickly sat down and leaned forward to whisper to Blaire. “Don’t say anything about the lottery thing. I haven’t told him.”
“Oh, that small thing?” she said, giving me a look of incredulity.
“It’s a long story. I’ll fill you in later.” It really wasn’t a long story. I hadn’t told Seth, then I hadn’t told him some more. Now it was way past appropriate timing. That was the story.
“I won’t say anything.”
“Thank you.”
Seth came back and set a book on the table and his bag on the floor, then lowered himself into the chair between Blaire and me. “Did Maddie also tell you that I’m really bad at Algebra II?” He pointed at the book.
“No, she didn’t.”
“You never told me you were really bad at Algebra II,” I said, sliding the book to face me.
“I didn’t? Huh. I probably didn’t want you to judge me.”
My mouth fell open and I started to object when he winked at me. I gave a breathy huff instead.
I pushed his book back toward him and the Stanford packet that was underneath it came into view. Seth picked up the packet and looked at the heading of the first page, which said in bold print, all caps: MADDIE IS GOING TO STANFORD AND THIS IS WHY.
He handed me the packet. “You’re going to Stanford?”
“And this is why,” I said with a smile.
“Yes, Seth,” Blaire said. “Help me convince Maddie to go to Stanford.”
“The one six hours north of here?”
“Is there another one?” I asked.
“Why do you need convincing?” He met my eyes, his expression so intense it made me blush a little.
“I … I’m just … I have a lot of choices.” I had four choices in my drawer so far. All in Southern California. None of them Stanford. None of them UCLA either, though.
“I’m sure every school wants you,” he said.
Blaire mouthed something at me across the table but I had no idea what.
“No. I mean, I don’t. I have. I didn’t apply to all of them. It costs money to apply so at the time I had to narrow it down.” Oh my gosh, why was I so flustered?
Blaire started leafing through Seth’s Algebra book.
“She’s more addicted to schoolwork than I am,” I whispered, happy for the distraction.
“I am not,” Blaire said, but kept turning pages.
Seth smiled. He really did have the best smile. And cheekbones. They were high and he had a great jaw line actually. He had really full lips, too. I shook my head and forced myself to look away.
“Is this what you’re working on?” Blaire asked, holding up a folded piece of binder paper she had found stuck between two pages.
“And she’s super nosy, too,” I said.
“Yes,” Seth answered her. “Probability.”
“Probability?” I piped up.
Blaire laughed. “Now who’s interested? That’s Maddie’s favorite unit.”
“You have a favorite Algebra unit?” Seth asked.
“Doesn’t everybody?”
“No, I can very firmly say no to that question. Maybe I can say that it’s my least favorite section. I don’t understand how Pascal’s triangle works with it.”
I took a sip of my latte, then flipped Seth’s book and paper toward me.
Blaire chuckled. “You’re in for it now, Seth.”
Thirty minutes later, I worried that Blaire and I had overwhelmed Seth. We were all three hovered over his book, shoulder to shoulder. Blaire and I had both explained the concept in different ways and he seemed to be getting the hang of it, but I wasn’t sure.
“I’m going to get a refill,” Blaire said, standing. “Anyone else want anything?”
I asked for another latte and Seth shook his head. When Blaire was gone, I pointed to the numbered question on the textbook. “Do you understand this one yet?”
“I think so. I didn’t realize how much it would help to have the smartest girl in the world explaining things to me.”
I knew he was being sarcastic but my cheeks went hot, anyway. Why did they keep doing that? “Second-smartest. Blaire’s the first.” I held out my hand. “Let me see your notebook, I’ll write out another way for you to solve this problem.”
He handed it over and I turned the page to get to a clean sheet, but it wasn’t clean. It had writing on it. I didn’t mean to read it, but my eyes immediately took in the words.
Seth noticed what was there just as I was about to turn another page. “Oh.” He turned the page quickly. “That’s nothing.”
“Is it a screenplay or story that you’re working on?”
“Just some random ideas.”
“It was good. Interesting.”
He shrugged. I could tell he didn’t want to talk about it so I dropped the subject and used the clean sheet of paper to explain the math concept.
He glanced over at me and I realized how close we were on this tiny two-seater table. The right side of my body was pressed against his left side, from our shoulders to our knees.
“Thank you,” he said.
“I’m happy to help.”
“That’s the line you use on all the zookeepers. I now feel like part of your service hours.”
“I’m sorry. That’s not what I meant.”
There was a sparkle in his eyes. “I’m just teasing you.”
“Oh. Yeah.” I needed to move away, my skin was on fire.
His eyes went down to his book. “I’m not a total screw-up,” he whispered.
“What? I never thought you were.”
“You’re just so smart and focused.”
“I think you mean boring.”
His eyes snapped to mine. “No. Not boring at all. Pretty amazing, actually.”
His words floated around my head, causing a buzzing sensation.
Blaire saved me by plopping my drink down next to me. “I got you decaf this time so you’re not up all night.”
“Thanks.” I used her interruption to push back from the table.
Seth looked at the Stanford packet that was still sitting in my lap. “I better go,” he said. “I told my mom an hour. It’s been two.” He held his hand out to Blaire. “Nice to meet you.”
Blaire shook his hand. “You too.”
“See you Saturday, Maddie.” He leaned down and gave me a hug that seemed to linger longer than normal (or was I just enjoying it more than normal?). Then he slung his backpack over his shoulder and was gone.
Blaire crossed her arms and tilted her head at me.
“What?”
“He’s what’s holding you back from Stanford.”
“What?”
“He’s keeping you here. You’d be all in if it wasn’t for that boy.”
“That is so not true.”
“This is why we had a pact, Maddie. A pact.”
“I know. I haven’t broken it. My hesitation has nothing to do with him and everything to do with my family.” My burning face wasn’t backing up my argument at all.
“Good. Because your family I can work with. I’m not sure I can compete with Mr. Smooth Talker.” She stared at the door he’d left through like he might come back and tell her she was right. But I knew he wouldn’t. Seth was just nice to everyone. I wasn’t anything special to him.
“Now,” Blaire said. “Let’s go over this packet point by point, okay?”
I nodded, but my eyes found their way back to the door.