39
A band of brothers
[Hank]
I’m nervous although I know what I want, which drives me forward as I enter Midge’s house a week after Gage gifts his wife a house. I’d been thinking about things long before the extravagant present, but this week, I’m determined to carry out my plan. I meant what I said; I want us to blend. I’ve been spending lots of time at Midge’s home and reconsidering my situation at Brut’s. It might be time to move out on my own because it might be too soon to move in with Midge. However, I want to assure her I want the more we talked about. I want us to be together someday sooner rather than later.
Midge is out tonight with the girls. Ivy’s already shopping for things for the new house. I carry three pizzas because these boys can eat. Setting them on the island counter, I stand around with the guys, chatting about baseball and their summer plans. Their dad is getting married soon, and Elston can’t stand his future stepmother. It worries me he might feel the same about me if I become his stepfather. The idea of being part of this family makes me smile. Elston and I will figure it out.
We made amends the same evening Midge and I spent the day in bed. I took her on one of our casual dates and then came home with her. I explained a few things about myself, my past, and my connection with the woman Ronin saw. Ronin opened up to explain how a girl from his band was threatening to kill herself, and Ronin didn’t know what to do. He told the girl he wanted to hang out with her, and then drove to the crisis center where he thought I could help him.
It broke my heart a little that he came to me, and I wasn’t able to help at the moment, but I told him how proud I was of him to try to take care of his friend. I also thanked him for trusting me to be there and apologized that I wasn’t. He understood after I explained, tears filling his eyes at my story of Stephie compared to his accusation.
“I was just looking out for Mom,” he said, and I respect that in these boys.
“Of course, and that makes you a good man. Your heart belongs to your mama first.”
As soda cans empty and the pizza boxes clear, I realize I only have so much time before Midge gets home.
“I wanted to talk to you guys about something. Man to man,” I say, looking up at Elston. We’ve come to a silent agreement. He’s the man of the house. I don’t plan to encroach on that, at least not exactly. “You guys know I care about your mom.”
“Oh no, please don’t talk about Mom.” Elston refrains from using ew, knowing I don’t like it.
“But he’s got that gooey eye thing going,” Liam adds.
“What’s the gooey eye thing?” Elston questions, peering down at his younger brother.
“Where he goes all gooey eyed talking about Mom, like you do when you talk about Eliza,” Liam explains. I laugh. Elston reaches out to cuff his little brother. Eliza is Elston’s new girlfriend. I think having her gives him a little perspective on his mom and me.
“Okay, well, I more than like your mom. I love her,” I admit, holding my breath as I wait for that to sink in. “And I’d like to ask her a really important question, but I want your permission first. All three of you.”
“Oh, my God,” Ronin squeaks, covering his lips. A smile breaks out on his face, his bright blue bangs falling into his eyes.
“What?” Liam asks, looking at his older brother.
“Hank wants to ask Mom to marry him.” The oldest’s eyes focus on mine. His lips twist. He’s thinking.
“Typically, a guy goes to a girl’s pop for this, but as your grandparents are in Chicago, and you guys are a touch more important, I’d like your blessing.”
“What are we blessing you for?” Liam makes the sign of the cross at me like a priest. Elston grabs his hand to lower it.
“He means he wants us to give him our permission to marry Mom.”
“That’s cool,” Liam says, shrugging his shoulder. “Can we still live here?”
“Of course.” I pause. “Well, we need to talk to your mom about that, but I’d like for us to stay here. I’d like to move in here when the time is right.” I figure being honest is the best policy. “But let’s do one thing at a time.”
“I’m okay with it,” Ronin adds. Elston stands with his arms crossed, his head hanging.
“What does this mean for us?”
“Nothing changes. You’re still the man of the house.”
Liam snorts. “Mom’s the man of the house.” He makes a funny expression, and the boys laugh in agreement.
“I mean nothing should change for you. Respect your mom at all times, and we’ll have no problem.” I direct my gaze at Elston.
Elston nods slowly. His voice remains quiet as he says, “Okay.”
A weight I didn’t realize I was holding lifts off my shoulders, and I open the small brown bag on the counter.
“I have something for each of you to show I’m committed to you as much as your mother.” Reaching in, I pull out six bracelets. Three of them are woven leather with a silver clasp. The other three are bright blue beads with three brown ones. Liam’s eyes open wide as he stares at the loops. I pass one of each to each of them.
“When I was in the band, we received a silver band because we were named Chrome Teardrops, and silver is a strong metal, binding us together.” I point at another bracelet I found buried in my drawer and added to the collection on my wrist. “I’m giving you leather ones, like this”—I point at the original band I wear, the one symbolizing friendship between Tommy, Denton, and me—“because, well, you’re younger, and I thought leather would be easier to wear.” I slip a new woven leather from my pocket, matching the ones I’ve given them, and wrap it around my wrist as a symbol of my connection with them. “This has four leather straps as we are four men.” I pause.
“The second bracelet I wear, the one with brown beads, symbolize how a team needs more than one person and no one person is more important than another in a circle. I’m giving you each a similar one with blue beads to match Elston’s eyes.” His head whips up. “And I want you to remember no one will look out for you more than an older brother.” I think of Brut before adding, “There are three brown beads for Ronin, Liam, and your mom. You’re the family first, but I’d really like to be a part of it.”
I wait as the boys slip the bands on their wrists, then I add another one to mine. I can’t help the smile on my face as I look around at our matching accessories. My heart gallops. I don’t know if I’ve ever been so happy, but then Midge comes in the back door.
“Howdy, boys,” she teases, her eyes sweeping over the empty pizza boxes and cans of soda. I might have let Liam have one too many. He’s the first to speak, hopping off his stool and heading for his mom.
“Look what Hank gave us.” He takes a moment to explain the meaning, and Midge rubs his back while he speaks. Her head comes up after a quick kiss to his forehead.
“That’s beautiful, Hank. Thank you.” The room grows quiet, and I’m center stage again. This isn’t the big moment, but…
“I have something for you as well.” I walk around the island, not certain her kitchen is the best place to handle this, but I want the boys as witnesses. “You already know how I feel about you. I love you. Tonight, I told the boys the same thing. I’d like to be part of your family. I’m not pressuring you. There’s no rush, I just want you to know I’m all in. You’re my someone.” I reach into my pocket and pull out a band of tiny cut diamonds.
“Hank.” She gasps, covering her lips with her fingers.
“This is a promise ring. A promise that you’re the only one for me, and I want to be the only one for you. I want more. And I promise, one day, I’ll ask.”
Her head pops up.
“One day, I’ll ask,” I repeat softly.
“Yes,” Midge blurts, her eyes filling with liquid, but her face is anything but sad.
“I don’t want to rush things.” The idea of moving in with her, it’s a big step…another step…in the right direction, but I understand she has the boys, and if I move in, there needs to be a solid commitment.
“Yes.” Midge giggles.
“I didn’t ask anything.” I snort, chuckling at her enthusiasm.
“Yes. To the promise of one day then.” She holds out her left hand, and I slip the ring on her third finger. My own eyes might water a bit at the sight. One day might be too long to wait.