Did I believe in fighting for what I wanted?
Damn sure. But I also knew when to quit. When to give up the fight and leave. Here was a young man, admittedly a prick deluxe, but he could offer Maya the world I couldn’t. It was time I saw this for what it really was—a sick obsession with my stepsister that could never go anywhere. It had no future.
Coming here tonight is a blessing and a curse.
It was in the moment I touched her leg and she looked up at me, her pain evident in her eyes, that my fucking heart flooded with so much love that I could’ve burst into flames. That was also the moment I knew I had to set her free—let her get on with her life.
Maya had so much promise; she was unassuming, beautiful, sexy, and smart. A great future ahead of her. She deserved the best. She deserved happiness. She deserved everything I couldn’t give her.
Little bee owed me nothing. Nothing.
Not. One. Single. Thing.
I was the one who was blessed to have saved her life. The one who was lucky enough to find her and take her to be fixed. I used her vulnerability to get what I wanted. Forcing her to be mine with idle threats really meant that she wasn’t mine at all. She was simply complying to save her father from further hurt. Maya was good like that, unlike some people who’d use others for their own gains. Like me. I was the monster she always said I was.
We were both damaged. The only difference? Mine was beyond repair. I’d never stop wanting her. Regardless of what happened, I’d always yearn to be near her. To hold her, to touch her, to fuck her.
That would never change until I drew my last fucking breath.
I fucking loved her.
Giving her one last smile, I pushed to my feet. “Please excuse me. I have some urgent business to get back to.” I leaned over my mother and planted a kiss on her forehead. “Thanks for dinner, Mom. You really are a great cook, you know?”
Mom’s eyes filled with tears as she looked up at me. I’d never paid her compliments since my father died. Indirectly I’d blamed her for what happened, when all this time he was the one who was fucked up. Sick and depraved.
Just. Like. Me.
Mom must’ve known this was goodbye. For the way everyone treated her like a pretty but dumb blonde, Larissa was pretty smart. She’d let on that she was aware that there was something between Maya and I that we were trying to hide, but she didn’t try to force me to tell her the details.
Maya sucked in a harsh breath. I didn’t look at her. My resolve would crumble and instead of walking out, I’d beg her to have me—in front of everyone. I didn’t care if they knew. I didn’t care if they thought I was certifiable.
I only cared that she’d be happy. By setting her free, she could have an idyllic life with her boyfriend. I wanted that for her. The best life possible.
The joke was on me—I was the dumbest prick of all. How could I have imagined this would work? I thought I was smart buying a place in Santa Barbara. It fucking backfired all right. Now I was stuck with a place I didn’t want to be anywhere close to. I’d rent it out, sell it, whatever—I really didn’t care.
Without another word, my back stiff and unyielding, I left the room. I could feel Maya’s eyes burn into me. Feel her sorrow even though I couldn’t understand why she’d feel that after the way I’d treated her.
She’d soon be free.
As soon as I got to the door, I whipped my phone from my pocket and dialed the office. “Sofia, get me a one way ticket to Copenhagen. First flight available. And let Mr. Jensen know that I’ll be at the office on Monday.”
When I was offered a contract by a global IT company a few weeks ago, I had two choices: work from home anywhere in the world, or relocate to their head office in Denmark. With any luck, I’d be leaving soon.
“Yes, sir. No problem. Any time you prefer to fly?”
“Didn’t you hear me, sweetheart? I said the first flight out. My bags are already packed,” I snapped. “And get a taxi to pick me up in ten minutes. Oh, one more thing—I’m at my mother’s house in Santa Barbara. Got that?”
“Oh. Okay.”
I was already halfway up the stairs, my chest squeezing so tightly that I could hardly fucking breathe. My insides tumbled, bile pushing up my throat.
I had to do this. For my little bee. So she could carry on with her bright future. I’d fucked up and this was the only way to make it all right.
With long, determined strides I grabbed a suitcase and threw a few things into it. Who the fuck was I bluffing? I didn’t care what I packed. The one thing I wanted to take had to stay behind. And with her, my heart would remain.
Gutted, I stormed down the stairwell, taking two steps at a time. My mother stood at the bottom, clutching her pearls. “Really, Oliver? You need to go this very minute?” Her skin was pale and her eyes wide.
And then my gaze fell on Maya. She stood behind my mother. It was the first time I’d seen them stand so close together, as if they needed one another’s support. Her skin was ashen; she looked as if she’d faint any minute.
She should be glad I’m leaving. Happy I’m taking my sick, depraved needs to another continent. Instead tears were spilling down her beautiful face.
She’s fucking crying?
Christ, I couldn’t deal with that! If she’d cursed me or sent a snide remark my way like she always did, I'd walk away and never look the fuck back.
I stopped in front of her. “Maya. Little bee, please don’t cry. It's crushing my fucking heart.” I couldn’t touch her without falling the fuck apart in front of everyone, so I just gripped my suitcase tighter, my knuckles white, and pulled the front door open.
The taxi stood there waiting. Good. I liked things to be organized and under control. I had to remember to give Sofia a raise. Funny the things that went through my mind while trying to pretend my fucking world hadn’t just imploded.
Turned on its fucking axis.
I got into the taxi. “Airport,” I barked. Fuck, even if I had to sleep on a chair until it was time to board, it would be better than staying at the house.
Sinking deep into the seat, my shoulders slumped forward. This was the hardest thing I’d done in my whole fucking life. I pressed my lips together and closed my eyes, pressing my fingers to my brows as my fucking heart broke into a trillion pieces.