A loud thwack sounded outside, and I looked through the kitchen window above the sink. Mute was chopping wood, his bare back to me and steam rising from his body in the cold winter air. His hair was gathered back in a short ponytail at the base of his neck, and I could clearly see his club tattoo. A colorful green, gold, and black dragon, wings spanning his broad shoulders, long talons tipped in red, and breathing fire. It was a beautiful work of art, one of several. He had other colorful tattoos on his chest and arms.

All three of us were living together, so to speak, and had settled into a routine. Mute was renting the one-bedroom mother-in-law cottage toward the back of the property. His rent was keeping the yard and landscaping up, house repairs as needed, and keeping the wood stacked up for the fireplace and woodstove. Mackie spent his days puttering around his greenhouse, or watching TV in his big reclining chair. I went to classes, worked at the bar, cleaned for Mackie, and cooked for all three of us. It became routine for Mute to walk in the house about the time I set dinner on the table. The first night, when I put a whole roasted chicken, fresh green beans, mashed potatoes and gravy, and homemade biscuits on the table, Mackie was beside himself and texted Mute, insisting that he come join us. Both men had gorged themselves silly, and Mackie had been in rare form.

“Oh, darlin’, I think I just died and gone to heaven! Them biscuits is the best I ever ate! You should be on one of them fancy cooking shows, you know, like them ones that has prize money at the end. Whadya think, Mute? Ain’t she somethin’?”

Mute just looked at him with one eyebrow cocked and picked up another biscuit. I think he consumed about half the chicken by himself, along with a generous amount of the beans and potatoes. I had hoped to get a few days’ worth of leftovers, but I kissed that thought goodbye when I saw Mute take seconds and then thirds. It was nice seeing both men enjoy their food.

Mackie continued to rave about my cooking, until I got red in the face from embarrassment.

“Who taught you how to cook so good? Your mama?”

I stiffened a bit, but answered with a smile. I felt comfortable in this place with Mackie, and thought it was a safe place for me. Not sure why I did it, but I decided to open up a bit about my life.

“No. I don’t know who my real parents are. Never met them. I was left as a baby at the hospital. I bounced around lots of homes for a while, but when I started school, I had one foster home I got to stay in for about six years. That was with Millie. She was more like a grandmother than a mom, but she taught me a lot about cooking, housekeeping, and just taking care of people. She was a retired nurse and a wonderful, giving person. I was twelve when the social workers decided she was too old to take care of me anymore and moved me somewhere else. I heard she passed away before I graduated high school. I think she’s the reason I decided to go into nursing. She was the best home I’ve ever had.”

I paused for a minute, and then grinned at Mackie’s serious face. “Not counting this one, of course!”

He guffawed loudly and slapped his thigh.

“Hot damn, girl! You a good ‘un! Ain’t that right, Mute?”

Mute had just looked up from spreading butter over the steaming white bread. His eyes were on mine, but he wasn’t scowling for a change. There had been a look of understanding or even comradery on his face.

I shook myself from the memory, lifted my phone, and tapped out a message to him.

Me: I’m not cooking tonight because of the Christmas party. I can make you a light snack if you need something. I told Betsey I’d be at the Lair at 6:00 to help her set up. Does that work for you?

I watched as Mute put down the ax and checked his phone. He turned to the window, wiping the sweat from his brow, and gave me a nod and a thumbs-up.

Mute had changed a lot toward me since the night my Fred passed on to wherever cars go, and my subsequent move into Mackie’s and his domain. I would get random texts from him asking if I needed anything from the grocery store he could pick up, what was I cooking tonight, what time my classes were over, and what time I was working. If he was around when I got home from the store, he would unload the bags of food for me. He started driving us both to work at the bar, and Mackie would ride with us on the nights he was up for getting out of the house and being around people. Those nights that Mackie just couldn’t do much, Mute would leave the bar several times during the shift to check on him, and then come back to get me when the bar closed. Mute always came home now, abandoning his room at the Lair. He ate most of his meals with us, and spent time with Mackie in front of the TV. True to his word, he never kissed me again, never even touched me, but he was as solicitous of me as anyone had ever been.

Mackie had good days and bad days. His medications sometimes worked and sometimes left him like a zombie. I could see the old man going downhill, but there wasn’t much Mute or I could do about it. He was planning on coming to the Christmas party, but he may or may not feel up to staying long. Mute and I had decided we would drive both the car and the truck. That way one of us could bring Mackie home when he needed to go.

The Lair was lit up with hundreds of colored Christmas lights. Betsey had told me that Brick was the one responsible. He loved putting up lights, decorating the giant Christmas tree, and all things that had to do with the holiday. He played Santa every year for the kids, cramming himself into a red suit and gluing on a fake beard. I had never had the childhood Christmas of believing in Santa and getting lots of presents under the tree. Millie had come close with a little artificial tree and homemade decorations, but it wasn’t that big of an event. I couldn’t help but get into the holiday this time, as Brick and Betsey’s enthusiasm bled over into every business the club owned.

The Lair became crowded quickly with all the families and kids. There were just as many lights on the inside of the lodge as the outside, blinking in tandem. Christmas music was playing from the giant speakers. Even the deer head that normally sported a baseball cap was decked out in a Santa hat, beard, and red bulb on his nose. The fresh scent of the ten-foot tinsel-covered pine tree mixed with the mouthwatering aromas of roasted turkey and ham. There were also several platters of deer meat, and a roast duck. Just like the barbecue at Halloween, the club provided meats, and the rest was potluck. I’d baked three cakes from recipes I learned from Millie so many years ago, five-flavor pound cake, butternut vanilla cake, and super chocolate fudge cake. I added them to the groaning table of food. Betsey directed the kitchen, and walked around always being a great hostess. People milled about laughing, drinking, and eating. Kids ran around chasing each other. Men played pool or darts, and the beer flowed freely.

I stayed behind the bar for the most part, serving beer and mixing drinks. I was more comfortable working than not, and the bar helped me to hide. It also helped to keep an eye on Mackie. He was over on one of the couches, telling a group of kids some of his war stories. I could tell he was getting tired, but he was having too good a time to leave.

“BOOM!” he yelled, bugging his eyes out and flinging his hand in the air. “Smoke was everywhere! People screaming and cussing, running around worse than chickens with their heads cut off!”

Mute came behind the bar carrying another beer keg. He tapped it and switched it out with the empty one.

“Thanks, Mute. I’m going to make an empties round while you’re here.”

He rolled his eyes and quirked an eyebrow.

“Not at work tonight,” I heard in my head. It was getting easier and easier to read his thoughts, and I was getting more and more comfortable doing it. Mute wasn’t nearly as scary to me as he once was, and although he did his best to remain gruff and aloof, living around him had shown me his true colors.

I grinned at him as I lifted the bar bridge. “I know, I know, but a little effort will make less work tomorrow when we have to come clean up this mess.”

I took Mackie a fresh beer to check on him, and gathered up a handful of empty bottles and Solo cups to toss in the rapidly filling trash cans. I spotted Stud on one of the corner couches, watching several of the brothers playing an Xbox racing game. He still had a soft cast on his arm, but his ankle was healed enough that he was off the crutches. Nikki was snuggled up against him wearing a short green elf dress and candy-cane-striped stockings. She was stroking his chest, and his good arm was around her. I felt a twinge of regret, wondering if that could’ve been me there curled up into his strong body.

“Past is past,” Mackie had intoned at me more than once over morning coffee conversations when it was just us at the kitchen table. “No use doin’ woulda-coulda-shoulda in this life, darlin’. Gotta keep moving forward.”

“Ho, Ho, Ho! Merry Christmas!!” Brick’s Santa appearance was heralded by the screams of excited young children. They surrounded the red-suited man wearing a Dragon Runner’s cut with cries of “Santa! Santa!” The older ones followed more slowly, but with the same enthusiasm.

“Who’s been naughty this year, and who’s been nice?” Several of the prospects came in carrying huge boxes filled with red, white, and green Christmas stockings.

“I’ve been good, Santa!”

“Me too!”

“I haven’t been bad at all!”

“Mama says I’m good all the time!”

Brick/Santa played the game a few more minutes, whipping the kids into a frenzy.

“Well I guess everyone has been good enough for this year. Let’s see what Santa has in his pack, hmm?”

Each kid had a stocking with his or her name on it. The choruses of “I’m good” changed to “Look what I got!” as they pulled out dolls, cars, Play-Doh, Lego, and other bits.

“Brick loves this shit, cain’t you tell?” Betsey sat down at the bar while I scurried back behind it again. I put together a margarita on the rocks for her, no salt, as was her preference.

“Yes, I can tell he does. It’s wonderful that you and he do so much for the club. The kids are having a blast. So’s Mackie.” I nodded toward the old man.

She took a sip of the drink and sighed.

“Oh, that’s good!” She set down the glass and tapped the rim with a bright red fingernail before grabbing my hand and holding it tight. “Finals all done with?”

“Yes, and I managed to get all A’s this time.”

“Good for you, girl. Nice not to have that stress. Ain’t been a bad year for anyone. The businesses are all in the black. A few problems been cropping up with the books and inventories, but so far nothing too big. Stud keeps that mess under control, thank the Lord! It would drive me batshit crazy to deal with all that!”

She paused long enough to take another sip of her drink and reload for the next round of words.

“Brick, I mean Santa, will get to the smaller stockings in a bit for the adults. Those have bonuses for the boys. Earned for their work and their loyalty to the club and to each other. This is a big deal for Brick, as well as the club. You know we’ve had a rough history, and this is a way of reminding us that we went through some tough times but came out on top. We’re stronger as a family, and we wanna keep it that way.”

Indeed, Brick was handing out smaller stockings to the club members, hugging each one and delivering a single slap on the back of their cut.

Betsey grinned, set her drink on the bar, and clapped her hands together.

“This is my favorite part! These next stockings are the Secret Santa ones. We get to pick a club person to buy for and go a little crazy. Everyone gets something good.”

I looked up in horror. “Oh shit, Betsey! I didn’t know! I didn’t get anything for anyone!”

She flipped her hand up and let out a pshhhhht!

“Ain’t no problem, darlin’. You’re givin’ enough by takin’ care of Mackie. Next year, however, is a different story. I’ll send you a list a’what I want.” She smiled and gave me a friendly tap on the shoulder.

The old ladies got stockings handed to them filled with jewelry, gift certificates, purses, and other stuff. Mackie was grinning from ear to ear with his collection of heirloom vegetable seeds. Even Nikki and Donna got stockings.

“Here, Kat, this one’s for you from me an’ Betsey, but this didn’t fit in it.”

My eyes got wide as Brick handed me a waist-length black leather jacket with long fringe hanging from the arms and across the back and front.

“Mute let us know what happened to your stuff. Thought this might come in handy.” The fake white beard spoke solemnly and kindly to me.

My eyes grew moist. “I… I… don’t know what to say!”

“Pssht! Say ‘thank you, Brick’ and try it on! Came from our leather shop. Mute ordered it special.” Betsey’s eyes were a little moist as well.

The jacket was beautifully made. The smell of the buttery leather tickled my nose as I slipped it over my shoulders. The cut and fit were perfect, and I could feel its heavy warmth settle over me like a deep hug.

“It’s wonderful,” I breathed, brushing the fringe hanging from the front with my fingertips. “I’ve never had anything like it before.”

“Darlin’, that ain’t all! Open the rest of your secret Santa stocking.”

I brushed at my eyes to hide their watering, and did as Betsey bid. Inside the stocking were a handful of store gift certificates: Macy’s, Kohl’s, Harley-Davidson store, and Victoria’s Secret. Each one in the amount of five hundred dollars.

“Wooo! You done good, Mute!” Molly wandered over and clapped her hands together. “We’re going shoppin’, girlfriend! I can hear those after-Christmas sales calling our names!”

Mute? Mute gave me two thousand dollars’ worth of clothing store gift certificates. I turned to him, my mouth hanging open in amazement. Mute was my secret Santa? He was holding his phone and texting. My phone beeped, and I glanced at his message.

Mute: I dont shop much. best I coud think of. Merry Christmas, Kat.

I shook my head, completely overwhelmed. “I… I… j-just can’t believe you did all this for m-me! You didn’t really like me much, but the last f-f-few weeks—”

“Merry fuckin’ Christmas, y’all!” a loud, rude voice interrupted.

My stomach clenched. Joker was back. He came in the front door with Box, carrying a large knapsack and wearing a weird contraption on his head. An elastic band was strapped around a Christmas baseball cap. It was holding a flexible stick resembling a small fishing pole that bobbed up and down with a sprig of mistletoe on the end.

Betsey harrumphed and shook a finger at him. “You’d best not be here to make trouble, Joker! Brick’s forgiven you for the last time, but you start disrespecting again—”

“Betsey, my one and only love! Please tell me you’ll run away with me tonight! Kiss me, darling,” he sang to her. “Lookie! I brought my own mistletoe!” He bobbled his head and the sprig moved up and down.

She laughed as his lips smacked loudly on her cheek.

“No problems, Joker! I mean it!” She shook a finger at him again as he bounced over to Molly, who pushed him away.

“Ugh! Get away from me with that stuff!”

“Aw! Molly, my precious!” he crooned.

“I thought I was your favorite!” Betsey teased.

“There’s plenty of the Joker to go around, ladies!” He spread his arms wide, the picture of a fun-loving guy.

Most of the other people were laughing at his antics. A few were eyeing him with mistrust. Stud was looking daggers at him from his place on the couch. Mackie was shaking his head. I turned to see Mute had moved to just behind me.

Mute was barely containing his fury, his hands clenching and unclenching, his jaw set in a hard line. Joker bounced over to us, grinning widely.

“I’m here to make amends for my behavior the last time we spoke, dearest Pussy Kat. Please accept my humblest apologies!” He made an elegant courtier’s bow, the sprig of mistletoe bobbing around freely.

“Um… apology accepted,” I stammered, unable to think of anything else to say. I felt Mute’s arm around me, pulling me to the side and shuffling me behind him, putting himself between Joker and me.

“Ho, ho, ho! What is this? Beauty and the beast, eh? Never fear, dearest Pussy Kat! I’ll fight anyone who calls you a beast!” Joker declared, dancing away.

I took a chance and placed my hand lightly on Mute’s arm. He always wore a black Henley under his cut, and I could feel the tightness of his muscles under the soft cloth. “It’s okay, Mute. He won’t make trouble. Too many people around.”

Mute didn’t take his eyes off Joker as he flitted around the room. His arm moved, draping around my shoulders and pulling me close to his side. The feeling of protection and security bloomed warm in my gut as I felt the heat from his body surround me. He had my back. He had me.

I couldn’t help myself. I was under his heavy arm, curling into his body, so it was natural that I put my arms around him, holding him close and laying my head against his shoulder.

“Thank you for everything, Mute. I don’t have the words to tell you how grateful I am for everything you’ve done for me.”

His glittering eyes left Joker and came to mine. He looked at me with a depth I hadn’t seen in him before, and my breath left me. Someday, I would look back and know this was the turning point. This was when I, Katrina Vega, was silently claimed by a Dragon Runner called Mute. I became his woman, his old lady then and there, just like a puzzle piece fitting into another one, perfectly locked into place. This was my place, and it made me feel complete. His eyes dropped to my mouth, and he raised a hand to stroke a gentle finger over my lower lip. I felt the bottom drop out of my stomach in anticipation as he swayed forward to take what now belonged to him.

A loud explosion suddenly rocked the room, and the walls shook violently. The deer head with the Santa hat and Rudolph nose fell off the wall. Women screamed and ducked, covering their heads. Some ran outside in confusion. Betsey looked out the window.

“Brick! The bar is on fire!” she screamed, pointing at the visible orange flames at the bottom of the hill.

Brick’s authoritative voice boomed out, the jolly Santa gone.

“Lock down! You know the drill! Dragon Runners to me! Let’s go!”

Mute dropped his arm from me and pointed to Betsey and Mackie.

“Take your cues from Betsey. Lock everything down. Take care of Mackie. I’ll be back when I can. Do not leave.”

I started to protest. “But Mackie’s pills! What if something happens?”

He grabbed my face and stared into my eyes, not in anger, but with a seriousness I had never seen before. His mouth slammed down on mine, kissing me deep and hard. It ended just as quickly as it started.

“Stay here, stay safe. Promise me!” his intense look conveyed.

“I’ll take care of business here,” I said, more calmly than I felt. I was stunned from the kiss and the sudden change in our relationship. “Please be careful!”

He left with the other bikers. Stud remained, but since there wasn’t much he could do with one arm, he limped back and forth in front of the bay windows, looking down at the burning building.

“Goddammit! Motherfuckers!” he cursed, more harshly than I had ever heard him.

Betsey rallied herself and the other women. “Right, then. Ladies, if you have a cabin already reserved, get yourselves there and your kids to bed. Locks and alarms. Gate’s already closed to the compound, so we’re solid, but if you don’t feel safe in your own places, go get your stuff and spread out in here or the loft upstairs. Nikki, Donna, and you others, get started cleaning up, and don’t make me come after your asses! Just put the trash outside the back door. Molly and Tambre, you sort the rest of the leftover cabins and any spare rooms we have here. Bedding, towels, toiletries, other supplies. Gonna be a full house tonight. Kat, you check the condition of the kitchen, and start packing away the food. See what else we have in the pantry and see how much booze we got. The boys are gonna want it later. I’ll join you as soon as I get my grandkids settled upstairs. Don’t know how long this lockdown is going to last, but we need to be prepared for whatever.”

“What can I do to help?” Mackie asked, still seated on a couch.

Betsey handed him a pair of binoculars and her phone.

“Watch what you can and listen for my phone. Brick will call me with whatever he finds at some point, but right now I need to keep busy. Come on, Cody an’ Shells, let’s get you up to bed.”

Betsey took the two softly crying and confused children upstairs. Mackie took his position to the side of the window, the binoculars glued to his eyes. Stud stood awkwardly by him, still muttering and cursing as he too watched the fire in the distance. Donna and Nikki apparently took Betsey seriously. They and the other women were clearing empties, wiping tables, and taking out the trash. I left and went into the kitchen. Betsey wasn’t the only one who needed to be busy.

Hours later, the kids were in bed, the food put away, and the kitchen nearly finished. My mind started to wander as I was mopping the floor.

Mute kissed me again, I thought as I stored leftovers, put dishes in the big industrial dishwasher, and wiped counters. He said he wouldn’t do it again, but he did. He gave me money for clothes. A lot of it. He’s cursed at me. He got me a place to live. He gets mad at me for no reason. He protected me. He fucked another woman right in front of me, maybe deliberately. He stood between me and someone who might’ve hurt me. He got me a phone when I needed one and couldn’t afford it. He hates me. He wants me. He loves me.

I stopped moving around. No. I shook my head. Don’t go there, Kat. Not the time.

Tambre came into the kitchen with an armful of dishes. She took one look at my face and dumped the whole pile in the sink. She was a little taller than me, mainly because she liked to wear heels with everything. She was a beautiful woman, both inside and out. She hugged me close and I felt her quiet strength seep into me, holding me up.

“He’s a hard man. Been through more in his lifetime than most of the others in the club, and it wasn’t pretty. Seen more. Done more. His hands have been dirty, and will be dirty again. I’ve watched it happen since he was a kid and Brick found him scroungin’ for food outta the bar dumpster. The stuff he lived with, the stuff he lived through, can leave scars on people. I ‘spect you know that, since you weren’t brought up with silver spoons or roses either.”

She moved away and started unloading the dishwasher, still steaming from its four-minute cycle. I picked up the stacked dishes and put them away.

“We been talking, me and Betsey and Molly. ‘Bout you and the club. You ain’t an old lady—” She paused and looked at me with her wise eyes, and added, “—yet.” She shifted more dishes to the counter.

“You ain’t a bunny neither, and ain’t gonna be, but you still got a place here. Your own place. Makes you family no matter what. Molly really wants you with Stud. I know that boy was interested, but not enough, not like Mute. When Stud looks at you, I see a man who likes you and wants you.”

She stopped and took both my hands in hers. “When Mute looks at you, I see a man who needs you and needs you bad. Needs you so bad it consumes him every day. I see him fight it like he has everything else in his life. He’s trying to not have that need, but it’s there and he’s losing and he’s scared. Scared bad. Both of you got walls, thick and tall ones. You been looking at each other over them walls for a long time now, and they’re cracking. One of you had to take the risk in breaking them down, and it is a risk. A scary one, ‘cause both y’alls hearts is involved and y’all have been bruised up a time or two in the past. You got to decide if he’s worth that risk.”

Molly appeared in the doorway, her face unusually solemn.

“Boys are back.”