I shifted against the sheets, surprised at how silky and smooth they felt. I ached all over, and I tried to remember why. Had I gone for a long run the previous day? Maybe down to the beach…

The beach.

I sat bolt upright, remembering the picnic with Nikolai, remembering the guys that had taken me and locked me in that storeroom. I swallowed hard, trying to piece together where I was since I definitely wasn’t there anymore. My hands were clenched in the soft fabric of the blanket, and I slowly turned my head to the side. I had been here once before, I realized. In Nikolai’s bed. And there, slumped in a chair next to the bed, was Nikolai.

My eyes widened as I stared at him. He looked pale and exhausted, and there was blood smeared on his clothes, his cheeks, his hands.

“What happened?” I asked hoarsely. “Are you okay?”

Nikolai stared at me for a long moment and then nodded. “I’m okay,” he said.

“But you’re…injured?” I asked, gesturing towards the blood.

Nikolai blinked, and it was like he only suddenly became aware of the picture that he presented. “I’m fine,” he said, leveraging himself out of his seat. “I should…shower.”

I swallowed hard, wanting to talk to him. But I couldn’t think of the words to say, and he was already drifting off out of the bedroom and into the bathroom. I realized, as he went, that I really didn’t want to be in there alone.

I shakily pushed the covers aside and followed him, glad that he hadn’t locked the door behind him. Nikolai was already under the spray, his body mostly obscured by the steam, outside of a sharp outline.

I slowly stripped off my clothes and stepped into the shower with him, burrowing into Nikolai’s warm side. He didn’t say a word, just slipped his arms around me as I started to shake, tears falling from my eyes. But I wasn’t scared anymore, not now that I was there with him. I felt so safe, so protected. Nikolai had come to find me, wherever I had been taken.

And even though I knew that I should be running the other direction, that it was his fault that I had been kidnapped in the first place, I couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that he had come to rescue me, that even though I’d been kidnapped, he’d come to save me.

I felt safe.

“I was scared that they might have hurt you,” Nikolai said suddenly, his voice raw.

“I’m fine,” I told him, trying to be as reassuring as possible. I pulled back so I could look up at him. “What happened?”

“There was a fight,” Nikolai admitted, looking away from me. “A lot of my good friends were…” He trailed off, a dark look coming over his face.

“I’m so sorry,” I said, feeling horror seep into me. It was my fault that they had had to fight, I knew. My fault that his friends had died or been injured. And what if something had happened to Nikolai as well?

“Don’t be sorry,” Nikolai said fiercely. “We all chose this. We all knew what we were getting into. I never gave you that chance.” He took a deep breath. “My Uncle Evgeni runs the local mob syndicate,” he said. “The Volkov family—maybe you’ve heard of us?”

I laughed, the sound surprisingly carefree. “I don’t keep up with crime syndications,” I told him, shrugging.

Nikolai stared down at me for a moment and then kissed me hungrily, his mouth hot against mine. We kissed for a long moment, his tongue pushing into my mouth and positively ravishing me. His fingers were like brands against my back, nails digging into my skin and pulling me impossibly close to him until it felt almost as though we could mesh into one.

He pulled away, resting his forehead against mine. “Sorry,” he said quietly. “I understand that you probably don’t want to see me again. Let alone sleep with me again.”

I raised an eyebrow at him. “I got into the shower with you,” I pointed out. I sighed, my breath fanning out over his lips. “I shouldn’t be here, but I just can’t seem to stay away,” I told him. “You saved me.”

“It was my fault that you needed saving in the first place,” Nikolai said, sounding tortured. He shook his head. “I can’t promise that there wouldn’t be dangerous situations in the future. And even if we got married, I couldn’t promise that I’d…” He trailed off, his face clouding, and I could tell how much he was hurting.

So I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him again, unable to help myself.

Nikolai groaned, his hands slipping down my sides, aided by the slickness of the water cascading over both of us. I could feel how hard he was, his member trapped against my hip, a hard and heated line. He kneaded my ass for a moment and then dragged his hands around to my front, slipping one hand between my legs so he could play his fingertips over my clit.

I moaned loudly at the sensation, the sound echoing in the shower. I bit my lip, feeling embarrassed, but Nikolai just smiled. “Be as loud as you want,” he said, a growl in his voice.

I stared at him for a long moment, mesmerized by his deep eyes. Then, I nodded slowly, mewling once again as he tugged at my nipple, twisting it roughly to send sparks of lust through me.

Nikolai spun me around so I was facing the wall, kicking my feet slightly wider and bending me over. He gave me only a cursory check with his fingers and then plunged into me, giving me all of his length in one go.

I screamed out his name, fingers spasming against the wall, and Nikolai froze, seemingly wondering if he had hurt me. I made a frustrated noise and tried to rock my hips. The leverage wasn’t quite there, not with the way that I was bent over, but Nikolai seemed to understand. He slowly began to move, rocking gently into me and then increasing the fervor of his movements.

“Like that,” I whimpered. “Please, just like that.” I reached around with one hand, tangling my fingers with his, while I continued to brace myself against the wall with my other arm.

Nikolai continued to thrust into me until I was just on the brink of coming, vision already starting to white out at the edges. Then, he suddenly paused, caressing my back gently as I sobbed with need.

He pulled out and turned me around to face him, lifting me up into his strong arms and urging me to wrap my legs around his waist. When he resumed his earlier movements, it was with a slow, steady, tender rhythm. He stared up at me, watching my face the whole time. Then, he slowly lowered his mouth to my collarbone, nipping and sucking kisses along my skin, making me writhe against him.

“I need to come,” I gasped. “Please, please, Nikolai. I need to come.”

Nikolai gave me a considering look and then pushed me back against the cold wall, his fingers still tight on my hips, as though he’d never let me go. He thrust into me hard, enough so that it punched the air out of me. He repeated the motion, and at that moment, I came, clinging to him, tears on my eyelashes as I climaxed again and again until I slumped bonelessly against him.

Nikolai’s movements sped up for a moment and then he stilled as well, spilling through his own orgasm, his forehead resting against my collarbone. “Emily,” he groaned, amazement in his voice.

I took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. It felt as though my body was still twitching, still so overstimulated by his presence within and without me. Finally Nikolai let me down, still staring at me with an unreadable expression on his face. He looked for a moment as though he wanted to say something, but whatever it was, the words didn’t seem to come.

Instead, he grabbed the loofa, squirted some body wash on it, and began to scrub down my whole body, moving with gentle, easy strokes. I watched as he worked, marveling at the attention that he was giving me, feeling something warm blossom deep inside of me.

He finished with the body wash and helped me rinse it all off. Then, he turned me around and repeated a similar treatment on my hair, scrubbing his fingers along my scalp, making me sigh and relax back against him. I moaned as he massaged my neck a little, tilting my head forward to give him better access.

Nikolai chuckled and pushed me under the water so that I could wash out the shampoo. As I did so, I turned to watch him soap down his own body, using quick and vigorous strokes that were totally the opposite of the ones he’d used on me.

“What does this mean?” I asked softly, unable to help myself.

Nikolai looked up at me, an almost betrayed look on his face, and I could practically kick myself for having broken the moment. But I didn’t want to sneak away from his bed again, didn’t want to feel like I had to. I had to know where we stood.

“When it came down to it,” Nikolai said, clearing his throat and looking uncomfortable, “I came to rescue you rather than helping my family win the fight.”

I grimaced. “I’m sorry,” I said.

But Nikolai shook his head. “I’m not trying to get you to apologize,” he said. “What I’m saying is, you’re important to me, Emily. I don’t know why. I don’t really know in what way.” He paused, taking a deep breath. “As I’ve mentioned before, this is new territory for me. I don’t date, and I definitely don’t…” He shook his head.

I swallowed thickly. “So, I should probably leave?” I asked. “You don’t do this sort of thing. You don’t want this sort of thing.”

“I didn’t say that,” Nikolai said, shaking his head. “I said that you’re important to me.” He brought a hand up to cup my cheek. “There are some things that I need to figure out with my family and with my future. And you’re going to need to be patient while I do that. I might not be able to see you for a few weeks. But I want this to work out. I want to spend the rest of my life looking out for you and…making you happy. If I can.”

I blinked at him, shocked by his words. Then, I slipped into his arms, hugging him tightly.

“Right now,” Nikolai continued, his voice a rumble in his chest beneath my cheek. “Right now, I’d really like it if you would stay the night. The whole night, this time.”

I giggled a little, feeling elated.

I knew I needed to focus on my work things, but the past few days had put some things into perspective. Maybe work wasn’t the most important thing in the world. And I wanted this. The past few years of travel had been so lonely, even in schools when I got along well with my coworkers.

“Come on,” Nikolai said quietly, reaching around me to shut off the tap. He climbed out of the shower and grabbed a fluffy blue towel, wrapping it around me and beginning to dry me off.

“I don’t have anything clean to put on,” I realized.

“I’d much rather have you naked in my bed anyway,” Nikolai said, a devilish smirk on his face. He looked a lot better now than he had before the shower, and I felt proud at having helped that transformation. “If you want, you could borrow a shirt and some underwear, though.”

I smiled shyly up at him as he wrapped the towel around me. “I’d much rather be naked in your bed too, I guess,” I said.

Nikolai smiled broadly down at me and lightly kissed my forehead. “Why don’t you go ahead in there?” he asked. “I’m going to dry off and then go get a glass of water to put next to the bed.”

“Okay,” I said, going into the other room and climbing into the bed. I sighed softly, relaxing back against the sheets. This wasn’t the way that I had pictured my year going, and I had to wonder whether I even had a job anymore. I didn’t even know what day it was anymore!

But all of those questions could wait. For now, as Nikolai climbed into bed next to me, I snuggled into his side. “I love you,” I mumbled as I started to drift off.

I wasn’t sure where the words had come from. Didn’t I barely know the guy? But I supposed I knew enough about him. He was so kind to me, so sweet. I could tell he was a hidden romantic, based on the dates that we’d been on. He might be involved in dangerous things, but I could tell that he was one of the good guys.

Nikolai lightly kissed my hair, stroking his hand down my arm. “I love you too,” he murmured.