CHAPTER NINE

Samira

Santana’s revelation still blared in my head like a song that wouldn’t stop playing on loop. Like the kind you couldn’t get out of your brain no matter how much you hated it or wanted it to stop.

My father was a drug dealer. Not just any fucking drug dealer though. He was the kingpin of Rhode Island. How much of my life had been a lie? Nothing made sense but we were all going to make it make sense.

Since I was in a daze, Santana jumped into action. He got tired of us standing in the foyer going back and forth so he said, “Let’s move this into the kitchen because I think everyone needs a drink. Sammie included. You owe her this, Pop.” His tone left no room for debate. Not even from Papa. He nodded silently and watched as I took the tequila from Santana.

I watched him in awe, his broad, muscled back flexed beneath his shirt. I had visions of my nails leaving angry red trails along his smooth skin while he fucked me like a madman.

His energy was magnetic. It was an energy that the tides and winds obeyed.

It was an energy that made the scrap of fabric between my legs transparent with desire. I needed that damn drink but not for the reasons Santana thought.

“How long, exactly?” I asked Papa once I’d taken a few sips of tequila.

“Since Santana was ten and you were six. It started off as a way to bring in extra money because times were hard but then before I knew it I was rising through the ranks and Pablo, the connect before me, took a liking to me.

When he got sent away for life, I took over his operation with his blessing. Then your mother and I started bringing in cash hand over fist. I was able to provide for you two like I always dreamed. I was also able to keep my restaurant open and thriving.” He looked into my eyes and I saw remorse swimming in them but the waters were shallow. He was only telling me about his past and present because Santana dragged it out into the open and made him confront everything.

“Was mom in on this with you?” Santana asked. His voice had been rubbed raw from the friction of emotion.

“Yeah, Alina was my right hand.” A nostalgia-coated smile graced Papa’s handsome face as he looked at something past me. Probably a reel of old memories. Normally, I wouldn’t have interrupted but fuck that. I had questions that needed answers and I wasn’t going to get them by staring off into space and smiling.

“So she was the queenpin then?” I asked with a raised eyebrow. The tequila was doing its job and relaxing all my muscles. Papa gave a curt nod.

“How deep did she get? Was she just on the business side of things?” Santana seemed to have as many questions as me. Mine were a jumbled mess rolling around the landscape of my mind like tumbleweed though.

Get your shit together Samira. You have questions too.

“She was involved in everything, Santana. You honestly get your temper from her. She was a firecracker and she was ruthless. She was truly my queen.”

“You’re not answering me directly, Pop. What did she do exactly?” Santana spoke in staggered sentences as if Papa was a toddler. The inflection wasn’t missed on him either, because he narrowed his gaze and grunted.

“She helped delegate. She sat by me during meetings. She held meetings when I couldn’t and she handled thieves and disloyal soldiers alongside me.” The air of pride in his voice was unmistakable.

It sent chills racing up and down my arms. The fine golden hairs on my forearms stood on end. The thought of my mother being a secret queenpin and standing right beside Papa, orchestrating drug trades and handling grown men, excited me.

A spark jumped to life and hunger began to churn in the murky parts of me. I took another drink of tequila and looked at Santana to see how he was faring. His jaw ticked up and down, up and down.

“Why the hell didn’t you tell us? You know how fucking dangerous that is to have your kids out in the open knowing you probably have tons of enemies? What were you two thinking?” I asked. Somehow, words managed to exit my mouth. They tore through the air, ripping apart Papa’s walk down memory lane.

The corners of his mouth turned down while Santana and I sat, waiting for an answer. Papa’s chest expanded with the deep breath he took. His explanation would be an entire novel. I knew it.

“We never sent you two outside without a shadow. All the guys you’ve come to know and love as uncles, they’ve all taken watch over you at some point. You two were never in any danger. I wouldn’t have that happen on my watch.” Frustrated, Papa finished the rest of his drink in one gulp. “Look, I don’t think I should be on trial here for wanting to protect my children. I love you both and wanting to keep you out of this life is not something I’m going to apologize for.

“I will apologize for going about it the wrong way but not for wanting better for you two. You’re my world, I would do anything to protect your innocence.”

“I can appreciate that, Pop but you gotta understand that this is going to take a while for me to digest. Well, at least the part about Mom.” Santana looked at me as if to give me the floor. I still needed time though.

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Papa,” I said. The sound of my chair scraping against the kitchen floor seemed louder than ever when silence was blanketing everything.

“I agree, we need some time apart. Especially me and you Santana. We’ll talk more tomorrow.” I didn’t like the edge in Papa’s voice when he spoke to Santana. It sent a flare of anger through me. Maybe it was the liquor, but I was more than certain it was something else.

“Papa, you better not chew Santana out. He did what you should have done a long time ago. If you need someone to be pissed at, be pissed at yourself because you’re the one who caused all the discord.

You should be thanking him for putting it all out there because you didn’t have the fucking courage to do it yourself.” My features morphed into a dark scowl that took Papa by surprise.

“Have you lost your damn mind speaking to me like that, Samira?” Papa asked in a low voice that used to scare me. Now, it signaled a challenge and I was up for it. I was tired of not speaking up. I was tired of not letting my true self be seen.

Why the fuck was I hiding and trying to be perfect for Papa when he was leading an entire double life right under my nose. Clearly, being two-faced came naturally.

“No. I found my mind. I’m going to start acting like it too. I’m not a little girl anymore, Papa. I think we all need to come to that conclusion. You did some fucked up shit keeping something so enormous from me and I’m going to be upset about it. Santana is going to be upset about it too and there’s nothing you can do. You can’t scare us out of experiencing our own emotions.

You don’t get to do that. Let us go through it without the threat of punishment or retaliation.”

I glanced at Santana and he smiled in my direction. His handsome face radiated pride and it made a bouquet of warmth blossom in my chest. Papa didn’t look too proud though. His shoulders were tight and his spine was stiff and straight as he glared at me. He tossed the expression over to Santana next.

“Everyone better have cooler heads in the morning because this talk is not over with.”

“It’s not over by a long shot, Pop.” Santana stood up and folded his arms. A small shiver rolled over me, watching his chest puff out. Was amazed that his presence quieted the rage brewing in Papa.

There was a mini stare-off before Papa stalked to his room, slamming the door. Once he was out of sight, I looked at Santana and let my eyes take in his features. “Thank you,” I said quietly.

“I couldn’t keep that shit from you anymore, Sammie.” He cleared the table of glasses then guided me to the steps with his hand on the small of my back. My skin heated up wherever his touch landed.

We found ourselves in his room, on his bed, talking in the dark. It’s how we got everything off our chests. It’s how we confessed to each other.

In a way, Santana was like my religion. Since our family was Catholic I was used to having confession with the Father but I never bared my soul as much as I did in the dark with Santana. That’s where I was free.

“I hate that Papa is mad at you of all people,” I told him, finding his hand in the dark.

“He’ll get over it. Nobody likes being exposed.”

“I can’t believe he’s a fucking kingpin. Let me guess, when you got kicked out of school for selling drugs, he realized he needed you selling his shit and not the competition’s?” I asked, finding Santana’s shining black eyes with mine. He gave me a nod that confirmed what I believed.

“I don’t mind working for Pop. I actually like it. I just hate the secrecy. If we’re this powerful ass family then let’s be powerful together. He’s trying to control circumstances that are outside of his grasp. He can’t control if I’m going to be like him or not. He can’t control if you’re going to be a perfect little accountant.”

“Yeah, because let me be honest with you…fuck that shit. Fuck Dartmouth and accounting and everything he wants for me. I want to figure out what the fuck I want for myself.” I paused a beat and said, “You know, Santana?” His arm slid around my waist and he pulled me closer. Good. I wanted to be closer. “If someone were to ask me what I wanted to do with my life, I would have no fucking idea what to say to them. None.” I made a sweeping gesture with my hand for emphasis.

“You’re so used to spitting out what Pop has been feeding you your entire life.” Santana gave my middle a squeeze and I nearly lost my breath. I slid my bare legs against his and he let his hand roam up the back of my shirt.

“I get that he wanted to protect us but after a certain point, we have to protect ourselves and make our own decisions,” I said with a sigh.

“So, after learning about everything are you going to Dartmouth to be a perfect little student?” His voice was full of mischief.

“Fuck. That. Shit.” I laughed and slid my fingers along his chiseled jaw. Santana’s fingers danced up my thigh causing my breath to hitch in my throat.

Shit…

Did everything Santana touch burst into flames? That’s what the hell it felt like.

“Pop is going to be pissed when you tell him you don’t want to go.”

“I need to figure out what it is that I want and he really can’t fault me.”

Things fell quiet for a few beats then Santana switched topics. “Thank you for standing up for me in the kitchen. You know I can handle myself though, right?” His fingers were inches away from the hottest, wettest part of me and I could barely contain myself.

I squirmed beside him, willing his fingers to brush against my pussy. My clit was so stiff and swollen and I had no idea when it got that way. It was begging for Santana’s touch though.

“I know but…you’re my brother and…”

“I’m your what?” He cut me off. His lips dancing dangerously close to my neck. Heat prickled my skin. I could feel the crimson it insisted on leaving in its wake. My breath was shallow as a puddle when his ebony eyes drilled into me.

“Brother,” I panted. He pushed my legs apart and my desire swam in the air. Santana’s massive body hovered over mine, eclipsing me in his shadow. The grumble snaking through his chest made me tremble like a leaf in the wind.

I’d been close to Santana nearly every day of my life until he went off to college. I sat on his lap. I kissed his cheek. I slept in his bed. I danced with him and laughed with him every day of my fucking life.

Having him on top of me, making me flood the bed while animalistic flames licked at my consciousness, was surreal. It made me dizzy. The room spun until all I could see were stars on the ceiling and dark clouds around us.

“Sammie, I don’t think I can keep being your brother. Not with the kind of shit I plan on doing to you.”

“You plan on it?” I quizzed.

“Fuck yes.” He tugged hard on my panties and the sound of thread popping also popped the daytime morals I usually had. A moan escaped me but Santana pressed his teeth into my bottom lip halting it. “Be quiet, Samira. Pop is right down the hall and I’m sure he’s not sleeping yet but I need to get inside your pretty, wet, tight pussy.”

“Fuck, Santana. When you say shit like that I feel like I’m going to explode.”

“As long as you explode all over my cock.” His lips fell to my neck. His teeth and tongue made quick work of my skin, bruising it just enough to make my pussy pulse.

I closed my legs around his waist and he groaned, bucking against me.

Oh my fucking God.

I had to take slow, steady breaths or else I was going to climax right then and there before he even got inside of me. Santana pulled his shirt over his head and I let my eyes feast on his body. It was perfect. It was chiseled out of whatever amber they used on Mt. Olympus to sculpt the gods.

I wanted him out of those goddamn sweatpants they’d been driving me insane all night and I needed to see his dick. I saw it a few times before when we were younger but it was only in glimpses. I wanted to see the whole thing. I wanted to see how strong and thick it was when I was the one making it stand at attention.

My fingers went to work, untying the drawstring at his waist. Not before I took time to trace that devastating V cut though. I wet my lips with my tongue then rolled them between my teeth as I plunged my hand below his waistband.

“Samira,” he growled bucking against my fist. There was so much power in his thrust that it made me nervous. What the fuck would he do once he was inside of me?

I needed to know. I was ready to throw the old outgrown pieces of our relationship out of the window and create a new relationship. One where I stayed in his bed and his heart.

After I warmed my hand on Santana’s thick cock, I tugged his sweatpants down his legs and he kicked them off so he could settle between my quaking thighs. We shared a knowing glance while our bodies cradled one another.

This was it. There was no going back once he was inside of me. I was never one to look back anyway though.

“I need a condom,” Santana breathed.

“No.” My voice was stronger than I expected. He blinked down at me as if he was torn but I didn’t want to use a condom. I wanted to feel him without a barrier.

While he was on top of me I realized that I’d wanted this moment for longer than I consciously knew and I didn’t want one more thing between us. Santana dipped his head down and brushed his lips against mine sweetly at first, fooling me into thinking the moment would be coated in sugar. The way his hard cock sank deep inside of my pussy let me know otherwise.

An involuntary howl ripped from my throat. The pressure he created was blinding but it was delicious and rich as a Godiva chocolate bar. Tears sprang to my eyes as I scrambled to adjust to his girth.

Holy fuck he was working with a monster.

The room spun round and round as Santana slid in and out of me. “You have to be quiet, Sammie.” He whispered before kissing my lips and swallowing my noises.

“You’re so fucking big,” I whimpered. My body tensed but I still needed more. Santana’s lips quirked in the most arrogant way. I wanted to complain but it was so fucking hot that I couldn’t do anything but beg for him with my body. I rolled my hips beneath him pleading for him to dig deeper but he wouldn’t.

The way he teased me was torturous. His lips slid along my neck while I pulsed around him hungrily. “Please Santana, I need to feel you fucking me.”

“You need to adjust. I will rip you in two if I fuck you like you’re some random girl off the street. You’re sweet…” He slipped deeper inside and I let out a cry that he muffled with his warm mouth. “You’re special, and you mean more to me than that. Plus, whatever motherfucker you let inside you before me didn’t know what the fuck he was doing. Now it’s my turn to show you how wet you can get and how hard you can cum.”

Oh, his words took me so high I had vertigo and if I’d dared to open my eyes while I was that high I would have become dust in the atmosphere. Santana wasn’t like the other handful of boys I’d been with before. He was so much more. He was everything more.

Desire swelled in my chest taking up every available cavity until it spilled over my lips in the form of Santana’s name. He pushed inside deeper and filled me up forcing hot tears from my eyes because I never knew I could feel so good.

I dug my heels into the top of his ass, forcing him to give me all of his inches. I didn’t want kid gloves. Once he was seated deep between my walls, he hammered into me like he could read my mind.

I felt wetness rolling from my pussy with every thrust he gave me. I took his beautiful pain and pressure gladly. He stretched me to my limit. To limits I didn’t know I had.

My body reacted without me. It was like Santana had access to the most ancient parts of me that existed before time. He spoke to my emotions commanding them to obey his every move.

When he pushed my legs back, my toes scraped the wall behind us and he found a spot I didn’t know was inside of me. It opened the floodgates and thick, slippery silk dripped from me like sweet water.

“Fuck, you are so wet, Samira.” He kissed a trail down my calves then pulled out making me whine at the absence of his fullness. I almost burst in tears until I felt his tongue snaking inside of me.

My back arched to the ceiling begging the angels that occupied the heavens to pause time and let my body live in that space forever. I pushed my fingers through Santana’s hair, gripping it in my fist while I painted his face with my pussy.

“Fuck my face, Sammie,” he urged. The vibrations from his deep voice shifted things around inside of me like the plates deep in the earth. I shook just the same.

I wasn’t prepared for his cock to penetrate me again. He had to close his hand around my throat to muffle the hungry noises I made. It only made the feelings more intense.

Every cell beneath my skin hummed. Electricity cracked the air into a million pieces and my body drew into a single pinpoint of pressure, ready to pop. “Santana,” I breathed his name because I had to say something I had to release some sort of pressure from my insides.

“Cum for me, Sammie. Cum again.” His long fingers spread my pussy lips open like they were flower petals and rubbed my clit like he was trying to stroke the pistil until the pads of his fingers were covered in nectar.

My entire body jerked with an involuntary spasm and Santana cursed against my ear. The stubble from his jaw tickled the side of my face, turning me into a ball of trembles and shivers. Oh god, I never knew I could feel that way.

I never knew my entire body could turn into an antenna set to receive pleasure directly from the stars. White-hot heat licked at every part of me burning every string that held me together.

I unraveled at lightning speed, coming undone like a ball of yarn. Desire spilled from my core soaking the bed beneath me. My own cosmic galaxy, painting the bed and soaking Santana.

“Fuck!” He grunted as his cock swelled inside of me, jerking and flooding me with hot, silky ropes of cum.

“Oh my god, you feel so good.” I pulled him down on top of me and sucked on his lips while we both floated down from our intense orgasms.

“You need to know something, Sammie,” Santana said between kisses to my neck that made me delirious. “I’m possessive as fuck and now that I’ve been inside of you and filled you up with my cum, everything is different.”

“Good,” I said, sliding my arms around his neck. I couldn’t imagine us playing games with each other after what happened between us. Santana may have thought he was possessive but he had no idea how territorial I could be.

I felt it crack open in my chest and tumble down the center of me.

Santana was mine now and I was his.

***