Chapter 3—Exchange
(Sena)
In the last couple hours, I had relaxed as it had flown. Unlike the night before, the zanzi had taken to flying at a much lower altitude and with less speed. Wind ruffled through my short hair and over my skin in a soothing crease, making it impossible not to enjoy the experience. From my perch, I looked down upon Indiku and saw the vast beauty of the land. Blankets of green coated the ground and every so often arrays of color would splash over the landscape when we would pass over a patch of flowers.
At one point, another zanzi appeared in the sky, flying much higher through the clouds. From the distance, I could only make out the red glint of its scales and massive size. It had to be three times bigger than the zanzi beneath me. My hands dug into the beast’s mane as my heart kicked into overdrive watching the other zanzi fly out of sight. Large, body-shuddering purrs vibrated through the blue zanzi—oblivious to my stress as we flew closer and closer to the largest mountainside.
“We are at the nest, Tao.” There was an excited hum to its words as we flew toward a massive cave entrance and landed with grace. The entrance to the cave was easily ten times bigger than the blue zanzi, which only led me to believe the cave itself was huge. ‘How big did these creatures get?’ I thought as I gaped at the massive opening. My legs tightened unconsciously against the beast’s sides.
“Don’t worry, Tao, you are welcome here,” he purred happily, his words slicing through my calm faster than a butcher’s knife. The zanzi didn’t hesitate, walking past the entrance and into the dark depths of the cavern.
“I shouldn’t be here,” I growled.
“You are my Tao Oliris. You belong with me,” the zanzi stated with conviction.
We moved deeper in the cavern’s unfathomable darkness, shrouding out the light the further we got from the entrance. If I hadn’t been out of my element before, I was now. Up ahead, the cavern began to show signs of light. The dense walls were dancing with the telltale signs of flames nearby. Large parallel marks scarred the rock on each side, gouged deep in some places. The walls began to widen, leading us into an opening where the fire light brightened and appeared lit in the middle of a largest natural interior space I had ever seen. With wide eyes, I took in the scene around me. Zanzi flew above my head in every color, their sizes varying, as did their shapes and physical aspects. Some were entering small caves set into the ceiling walls, while others flew around in circles at the cave’s ceiling. It was a beehive of unbelievable scale, and I was in the middle of it. “Oh fuck me. This is bad.”
The zanzi walked into the center of the cavern toward the huge fire. It was much bigger than it first appeared to be, easily reaching a good fifteen feet, about the same height as the blue zanzi. The blaze along with my own fear caused sweat to pour off of me in rivulets down my forehead and into my eyes. I licked my lips while keeping close to his back, regard shifting in every direction. From above, eyes started to land on us, their attention settling right on me. I’d never felt so vulnerable in my life; not in juvie, and not in the events leading up to my time on Indiku. My skin felt tight from their stares, to the point of pain. There was no possible chance of rescue. I was a prisoner and my life meant nothing. I had to find a way out, and somewhere not in the open.
That familiar hiccupping growl came from the zanzi before it let out a tremendous roar that echoed within the mountain. My ears rang, the hum of the noise bouncing around my head in a painful ricochet. My heart thumped to a hard staccato, making it difficult to breathe. All the activity in the cavern stopped, every gaze focusing down on us. What had seemed like a massive number before doubled as more and more zanzi appeared from the caves within the mountain.
Another trumpeting roar spit through the cavern, farther up in the mountain, but even more resounding than the blue zanzis. There was silence except for the lingering call and my thudding heart. Looking up to the highest point above, a massive shape descended toward us. It came down with a massive force that shook the ground, the fire’s glow only revealing its color once it had completely landed—pure, translucent white scales gleamed in the orange shine. The color took me by surprise, but the massive size of the creature astounded me—terrified me.
Then it approached us, dwarfing the blue zanzi by at least twenty feet. Its red eyes were steady and unblinking as it lowered its head toward us. A large forked tongue peeked out, tasting the air.
Other zanzi gathered around us, making a circle. I needed to find a weapon, and a way out of the mountain. I looked around the cavern, low to the ground, trying to find any small spaces that I could fit through. I desperately searched as more zanzi filled the space. Almost all of the gathering creatures were as massive as I had perceived in the distant leeri fields. They were making noises; a variation of many Earth animals—deep coos, growls, and clicking that echoed around them. They sounded like demons in movies back on Earth right before they tore you apart. It was hell.
Hot breath whooshed over my face, the scent of meat making my throat tighten on a gag. The white zanzi’s head was right in front of me, its red eyes reflecting my expression from the short distance. There were no words to describe the opal scales this close, each reflecting a shimmer of color a little different than the one beside it. If I wasn’t so terrified of it, I’d say the beast was the most beautiful creature I’d ever seen. Sharp spines ran in columns down its back and hard nubs around its nose and joints, while quills extended from its chest and other vulnerable areas. This creature was made for destruction; there wasn’t anything soft—it was nothing like the soft-maned blue zanzi I sat on.
Rows of teeth appeared before me and the white beast growled, a furious noise that reverberated off the walls, revealing the number of fangs that a zanzi harbored in their mouths. A low-answering snarl tore from the blue beast, quickly backing away from the white giant so that there was distance between them. Shoulders hard and back ridged beneath me, I knew something was not right. The blue zanzi was as tense now as I was. The white creature growled again. A tail wrapped around my chest and dumped me on the ground under its massive legs. It had taken me off its back. I looked at the soft underbelly of the blue zanzi and at the other zanzis all around us. Quickly, I stood up, this was my chance; I refused to die.
“La’el, why did you bring it here?” The silver zanzi began the same cooing that the others had been doing, with a hard tone to it. I could understand it, had to be because of the blue zanzi—La’el—that had to be its name. I looked out to the cavern walls, searching for an open space I could run toward. If I was going to get out of here, I needed to do it quick.
“Aza, Tao Oliris, Senana Sa’z Rays.” La’el’s voice wavered as he spoke, timidness forming in place of the confidence he’d had since he’d taken me.
“That is impossible. This creature cannot be; only zanzi can be Tao Oliris. You are being naïve.” It paused, red gaze slipping to my shelter. “You can’t return it, it has seen the nest. Kill it,” it roared, deafening the cavern with its ferocity. I was running before I could think. I passed under the blue zanzi’s belly and back toward the entrance, my plans forgotten.
An enraged roar emitted from the blue zanzi, making my steps falter as I move around his tail. “He is mine! We exchanged!” it snarled and chirped wildly. I didn’t stop, sprinting like my life depended on it, my feet pounding against the compact ground, getting me as far as possible. Something slammed into me from behind, throwing me into the rock wall with a hard smack. I crumpled to the cavern floor, muscles loose for the first time in hours, my head pounding and vision fading in and out. Even through the haze, I could hear the blue zanzi’s keening. Soft flesh gently pressed against my cheek, its warm breath seeped into my skin—somehow, it was comforting.
The stupid creature really cared about me. This whole situation was fucked up. My vision was blurred as I looked up at the blue creature. Rhyan would be pissed if I died in a cave like this. That thought kept playing out in my head as my vision went black.
(La’el)
I could feel when my Tao lost consciousness. His mind ceased and the tension drained from his prone form. He was hurt, but not severely. His life force was thrumming inside me, beating alongside my own heart. I curled my tail around him protectively, daring any to come and harm him. I hadn’t meant to hurt him, but my thrashing tail had thrown him right into the cavern wall, the thud making my breath catch. It wasn’t in a zanzi’s nature to harm their Tao, but I was starting to think mine might be the exception. He was so small and vulnerable, it would be hard to protect him—even from myself.
I glared back at the large white zanzi, his face contorted into harsh lines and narrowed eyes. “Aza, he is my Tao. Why do you not believe me?” I pleaded with my sire. He stared at me with unfazed red eyes.
This had been my first flight away from the nest. The call had pulled me as suddenly and unexpected as it did all of us. I had told my Aza that I could feel it—feel my Tao—and he had told me it was time for me to go. I was certain when I’d found Senana, my Aza would be happy for me, since nothing was more sacred than finding your other half. Yet here he stood, looking at me with open disdain.
“La’el, he cannot be your Tao. It is impossible, little one. He is human.” The last word was said a high trill, his large fangs revealed as he growled.
I snarled in return, making sure he knew I was serious. I had known Senana was my Tao the moment I had seen him, and he knew the moment he had seen me. I took a moment to look down at the prone body that lay cradled in the crook of my tail. His face was much softer in sleep. Although he wasn’t zanzi, he was a beautiful creature with a soft brown mane and bronze skin. He may not understand our connection, but he knew instinctively that he was my Tao. Now, I just had to convince my nest mates.
“He is my Tao Oliris. I will fight for him, Aza.” Aza looked back at me with skepticism. I didn’t understand why he was so unhappy about Senana, but I was certain it had to do with my lack of knowledge. I was young to our kind, only forty Indiku phases, but I wasn’t stupid, and I knew when my Aza was hiding something from me. The simple movements of his body and the hardening of his rustic eyes said it all. This may have been my first time away from the nest, but I was no hatchling.
Tense silence passed as my Aza stood there deciding what he wanted to do. I was terrified of his verdict, but I was also determined to stand beside my decision. I wasn’t wrong; I knew Senana was my mate.
“You can keep it here, but it is your responsibility to keep it away from the others. I do not approve of this, La’el.” He turned and launched into the air, to return to his cave above. I had to choke back the pain that flooded my young heart. All my life, I had done everything to please my sire, yet with this simple action, I had lost a lot of his respect. I kept my cries from breaking through, as they were as good as any indicator to my sorrow and I had to be strong for Senana. Almost a hundred set of eyes watched me, waiting now that they knew I didn’t have the approval of our nest’s leader. I couldn’t let them see my weakness.
I sucked in a deep breath of air and looked at the other zanzi gathered around me. A hiss of warning left me as I pulled my mate closer to my body. No one would take my Tao from me. If I could not please my Aza because of who my Tao was, then I would have to show him how strong I would be.
My tail wrapped around Senana’s limp form and pulled him up to lay him across my back. I would keep him in my cavern for now until things settled.
(Sena)
I woke to that delicious heat again, wrapping around me like a protective blanket. Except this time, soft snores pulled me to consciousness. A part of me didn’t want to wake up. I knew what was waiting for me, and I didn’t want to face my grim reality at the moment. At some point, I’d have to accept that I was going to die in this mountain and no one would really know what happened to me. My father would likely be relieved; he’d no longer have to deal with his failure of a son. Rhyan would be angry with me, not that he hadn’t been angry the day I’d been carted off to this planet. As a sum, there weren’t many people who would be affected by my death. Just a long lost man with a bad temper. That’s all I would be. A bad memory.
With that bleak thought, I opened my eyes, and blue scales filled my vision. I was settled against the zanzi’s belly, its wing lightly draped over me, while its head lay beside me. I took the time to examine it up close. Its scales were iridescent, the small amount of light in the cave shimmering and changing the shades. The majority of its scales were blue, as was its entire mane. That was something unique about it that I hadn’t seen in the other zanzi; whereas they had been sharp with spines and quills, it was soft with mane and a set of ivory horns. Does the difference signify something? I wonder as I gazed it over.
Shaking my head, I dismissed my curiosity. I needed to focus on escaping this nest and getting back to the leeri fields. Tentatively, I patted around the soft bedding we were laying in, trying to find the edge of it. The zanzi’s wing was the only thing holding me down, and it was easy to roll from under it and to the end of the nest. Slowly, I straightened, feeling the first signs of my injury spike through my back and head. I didn’t know how I’d hit the wall, but I’d probably had massive bruises forming along my back and sides.
Lips pressed taut, I held in a groan of pain as I dropped down three feet to the ground. I paused and listened for any sign of movement. The zanzi continued to snore, its wing twitched in the empty space. With little light to help me out of the cave, I used the walls to guide me toward the exit. It wasn’t far before I could see the familiar orange glint of flames illuminating the exit. I walked out into the huge cavern inside of the mountain from before, but it was so much worse. There were no zanzi that I could see, all of them likely sleeping like the blue one, but looking down, I could see the glow of the flame wasn’t from the one on the cavern floor. It was another one built higher up. Peering down over the ledge, I found the massive flame. The only exit I knew of was more than three hundred feet below. I kicked a rock with force, sending it clattering to the ground with an echoing click against the stone below.
“How the fuck am I supposed to get out of this!” I tugged at my hair, pacing the small ledge restlessly. I stopped, seeing the eerie glow of eyes in a cave across the chasm. They appear from the darkness, the light revealing a deep shade of scales, but nothing more as it retreats into its dwelling. I stood rooted, defenseless, vulnerable. At least with the blue zanzi, I didn’t feel completely helpless.
“Tao, you must not leave our nest without me.” Its voice broke through my trance, making me jump, almost falling backward if not for its tail wrapping around my waist and gently pulling me to its side. Panting, I clutched at the appendage, thankful it had kept me from falling some three hundred feet.
“Be calm. I will keep you safe.” Its words were soft in my mind, a physical hum vibrating out of its throat as it nudged my cheek affectionately with its muzzle. The soft contact did settle my frantic heartbeat and I took in a long breath to help ease the receding panic.
“What do you want with me?” I was tired of this, not understanding why I was brought here. What was the point? Why did it seem so determined to protect me? There was a chuff in response before silver eyes gazed right into mine.
“You are Tao Oliris,” it responded without taking its eyes off me, the silver orbs huge and expressive.
I pull away from its tail, running a shaking hand through my hair. “That doesn’t explain fucking anything!” I barked out, feeling a rising flush in my neck and face. If this creature really gave a shit about me, it wouldn’t have brought me here to be torn apart by its kind.
The blue zanzi sat back on its haunches, watching me closely. “I only wish to keep you safe and happy.” Its words were tentative and eyes pleading.
“I need answers! I need to understand this fucked-up mind link. How do you know my name? Why did you come to the leeri fields? Are you female or male? I don’t know anything, except that I’m stuck in a zanzi nest, trying to keep my back to a wall so I can see what’s going to eat me!” I shouted the last bit, feeling all of my anger building, trying to blot out the mass of emotions wanting to clog my brain. Anger was the easiest emotion for me to fall on, and I was willing to take the easy way out in this situation.
The blue zanzi shifted its weight, gazing out along the cavern walls at the other caves. The glow of eyes appeared again, one after another, all of them watching us from their dwellings. “Come back to our nest, Toa,” it said softly, already moving around me, forcing me back into its cave.
I didn’t resist. The sight of all those glowing eyes made my skin feel tight, and I wanted to get away from their scrutiny as much as the blue zanzi did. We walked back into the cave to the soft bedding; I sat down, letting my head fall into my hands as I tried to absorb everything. I just wanted answers, and a flight back to the leeri fields. I couldn’t stay here. I only had one more year and then I could return to earth, back to my friends, and Rhyan.
“I am called La’el.” It physically spoke its name, and it sounded gruff and hard to distinguish. The zanzi approached me slowly before getting in its bed and lying down beside me. “Zanzi are neither male nor female. We do not procreate like other species do.” This made me frown and look back at it, seeing those blue eyes gazing at me in return.
“Then what are you—both?” I asked since I couldn’t come up with any answers in my own head. It made a deep-throated noise that reminded me of something I would do when I was trying to figure something out—or explain something complicated.
“I am capable of both roles that usually only one or the other requires in most species.” It confirmed it’s hermaphroditism without any hesitation.
“You can reproduce on your own?” I looked into its swirling blue eyes and tried to compute what it was saying.
“No, there must be two to make three, but either can choose to harbor the egg. Only Tao Oliris can give each other eggs. No other will be able to,” it explained as if it made sense, and to it, I’m sure it did. Still, we were slamming into a language barrier. “To make it easier on my Tao, I will say I am male, like you are.”
“Fine, I’ll refer to you as male. What about Tao Oliris? That doesn’t translate into anything and you keep saying it.”
“It is our other half. Zanzi live for a very long time, much longer than most. Over that time, our minds can wander if we do not have something to anchor us to this life. Two souls are needed to join to survive. Without the companion soul, the zanzi mind cannot take the burden of time.” His look was questioning, trying to gauge if I’d understood everything he’d just said.
It did make sense. Zanzi needed to bond with another zanzi so that they wouldn’t go crazy over the long period of time they lived. What still didn’t make sense was why he was referring to me as his other half. “Look… La’el, I don’t see how I could possibly be capable of being your… Tao Oliris…since humans only live…” I calculated Indiku years compared to Earth years, “…fifty Indiku phases. I’ll die before you’re even mature.”
“That cannot be.” He lowered his head and looked at me with pleading blue eyes, raw emotion floating in their depths.
Awkwardly, I lay my hand on the top of his head and stroked the soft mane and ivory horns. The motions were weak at first, but I soon got into a comforting rhythm. “I’m sorry.” My words made him shudder through a painful intake of air. The creature’s pain made my stomach turn and my heart constricted in my chest. Even after everything he had put me through, I didn’t want to see him in pain. My mind warred with my heart—I shouldn’t care, but some deeper instinct wouldn’t let me not care.
“You’ll find who you’re looking for. Once you take me back to the leeri fields, you can start your search.” I needed him to calm down. I was the one who would face death if he didn’t take me back.
“No, it’s not a mistake. You are my Tao. I knew the moment I saw you, and when you touched me, it only confirmed it. Our souls are already partially connected.”
“When we touched? Is that why I can understand you?” I remembered something happened the first time I touched him, some kind of powerful surge through my body.
“You didn’t learn anything from me?” The words were resigned. “It was part of the exchange, only you didn’t get anything from it. All of our knowledge and memories should be shared, except I only got some of yours, and you didn’t get any of mine.” An unexpected growl rolled out of him, sharp teeth bearing down at me. My heart skipped in my chest and I flinched at the sudden rage written on his features. The blue zanzi jumped from the bed and swiped the nearest wall with quick talons, gouging out the rock with little resistance.
I watched as he clawed into the wall like a manic animal. “It wasn’t supposed to be this way!” He snarled and growled, tail thrashing furiously. The screech and crack of breaking rock made me cringe. His tantrum lasted a few minutes before he stopped as quickly as he’d started, head bowed dejectedly, silver eyes closed and puffs of smoke appearing from his nostrils.
The whole display had been a familiar one, except it was usually me punching at something with no warning. I understood losing it, not knowing how to control that gut-burning anger that eats you alive if you don’t release it. I waited for him, watching the shallow breaths ease in and out of his large frame.
“That’s how you knew my name,” I continued, not giving him time to answer. “I can understand you because you know my language after seeing all my memories.” The fact that he knew things about me made me feel exposed in a way I wasn’t used to.
The zanzi shifted and opened his eyes to look at me. “When we touched, you gave me some of your memories. I thought you would receive mine.” He looked away, shoulders lifting a little as if something had occurred to him. “I can only hope when we exchange so’ano it will correct itself.”
“What is so’ano?” I asked, already feeling unease leak into my gut.
His face scrunched as he tried to find the right word. “Seed,” he finally translated.
I narrowed my eyes. “When you say seed, you mean like plant seeds…right?”
His forked tongue flicked out, tasting the air. “No, Senana, seed from the body.” He watched me closely for my reaction.
“And how do you fucking expect that to work!” I barked out, already feeling nauseous at the prospect.
La’el’s eyes narrowed and another puff of smoke plumed out of his nostrils. “I don’t know, but I’ll find a way,” he concluded.
My fists clench. “What if I don’t want you to? I want you to take me back to the leeri fields!” I growled and pushed my hand through my hair again.
“I can’t take you back, I’ll die without you. Senana, please don’t worry, I will figure something out. We can exchange in a different way than is usually done.” His large body moved away from the battered wall. He stopped in front of me, head craned downward. I couldn’t look away from his blue scales and expressive blue eyes.
“How is it usually done?”
“I don’t want to startle you,” he said reluctantly, averting his gaze.
“I need to know,” I said and crossed my arms defensively.
Little halos of smoke slithered out from his nose. I started to associate the smoke with an agitated response. “It would require…penetration,” he finally got out.
He couldn’t want to… “That’s fucking impossible. I’m not your mate. I can’t even finish—” I swallow back my rising nausea and continue, “—exchanging with you…not without killing me.” My stomach rolled and I had to swallow back the bile tickling the back of my throat. After almost a day since I’d been taken, I hadn’t eaten or drank anything. I couldn’t afford to lose what little I had left in me.
“I’ll figure something out. I know you are my Tao, it’s just a little more complicated,” he said reassuringly, but the smoke that continued to flow out of him spoke otherwise. He was just as upset as I was, only for completely different reasons.
“I’m not some experiment!” I slam my fist into the nearest surface, mangling the skin till blood rolled down my knuckles. Nothing gave him the right to take me and use me! I couldn’t die in some mountain to a deranged creature who thought we were meant to be together. “I don’t belong here! Take me the fuck back!”
Snarling in response, the blue zanzi bared spit-slicked fangs at me, the same ardent temper mirroring in his narrowed eyes. “You do belong here! You are my Tao. To say otherwise means I am unwanted by the other half of my soul!” the zanzi roared, his affliction clear in every tense muscle.
“I don’t care! I didn’t ask for this!” I gestured to the cavern. “What the hell do expect to happen if I stay here?”
“I do not know. Give me time,” he urged, lips covering his fangs, his anger vanishing as quickly at the plumes of smoke.
I looked around the dimly lit cavern and then to the blue zanzi. I needed to get out of here, but I also needed him to trust me. I would have to get out before he came up with a solution to the exchange. My nausea returned, threatening to tear up my throat on its way out, but I swallow the knot down. I pushed my uninjured hand through my hair and yanked forcefully at the strands to clear my scattered brain.
“One rotation and that’s it,” I said firmly. “And you don’t fucking touch me. Figure out how to live without me by then and return me to the leeri fields.” That meant I would be here willingly for five Earth days. What the hell was I getting myself into?
“You won’t be able to resist the pull, Tao.”