“What was that all about?” William points in the direction of the cab, shooting downtown.

“He has to pick up Ben from swimming,” I say, taking a deep breath I hope will squash all these awful feelings that are about to become a geyser of tears.

Feelings are the worst.

But they’re just hormones.

This is like craving pickles and ice cream.

Even though I didn’t crave that.

But clearly the baby has taken over all my thoughts, feelings, and emotions because someone is determined to turn on the water faucet in my eyes.

“And you’re about to cry over a swimming lesson?” William asks as a bus trundles by, spewing fumes that make me want to wretch.

I wince, and William sets a hand on my back. “Let’s go inside.”

I nod and bite my lip, holding in the tears.

Once inside the lobby, he heads straight for the elevator, and that’s when the pregnancy wins.

I leak tears.

They spill down my cheeks.

They’re going to drown me and carry me out of this building and onto the street and down the gutters and all the way out to the Hudson River where I will wallow like a beached whale of sadness in the stinky water.

Once we step into the elevator, all the tears attack me like truth serum, and I spit up the words. “I’m a terrible sister. I fell for your client, and I am so crazy about Miles, and I’m so sorry I got involved with him, and I hope it doesn’t affect your business, and if you want to fire me as your only sibling, I completely understand.”

William, bless his heart, doesn’t laugh. He simply wraps his arms around me. “There, there. It’s okay. I’m not totally clueless. I do have a wife and two kids, and I’ve learned a thing or two. I had a feeling there was something brewing between you guys.”

I sob into his chest, and possibly there might be snot on his lovely dress shirt. I’m a total pig. I’m a snotty pig-whale. I’m a slug. “Then it’s your fault for introducing me to someone so irresistible,” I blurt out.

The elevator slows at my floor, and he laughs. “Yes, it’s all my fault.”

We head into my place, and I turn to him, worry taking over. “You’re not upset with me? I didn’t want to put your business at risk, but I did, and I’m sorry.”

He shakes his head. “No, I’m not upset with you at all, and my business is just fine. But I might be upset with him. Did he hurt you?”

“No,” I say, my voice breaking again.

“Then why are you crying?”

“Because we can’t be together,” I sob.

“Why?”

“Because he wants to just be friends.”

William’s jaw ticks, and he hums a note of disapproval. “And now I’m more than upset with him. Because he did hurt you.”

I shake my head as we sit on the couch. “It’s not his fault.”

“Whose fault is it?”

I shrug and hold out my hands. “I don’t know. The whole thing is just a mess. His son was saying things about moving into my apartment, and I was asking Miles if he wanted more than . . . you know.”

William rolls his eyes. “Yeah, I get it. You were banging.”

I sigh. “Yes, well, we banged once. Okay, more than once. But it was all in one night, and it was more like—”

“The number doesn’t matter. You were banging. Got it. And you asked him if he wanted to bang again?”

“Sort of. I asked if he wanted more than sex, or more sex, but it might have come out awkward.”

“Might have? Like now?”

“Look, I’m bad at love, okay?” I point to my belly. “Hello? Here’s the evidence. Just ask Mom.”

He takes my hand. “Mom doesn’t think you’re bad at love. She wants the best for you.”

“And she thinks that’s what you have.”

“Is that what you want? Marriage, kids, the whole nine yards?”

I suck in a sob and swipe my cheeks. I think about his question. But I don’t have to think about it at all. The answer is abundantly clear. “I want it with Miles. But he doesn’t want it with me.”

William strokes my hair. “Are you sure? I mean, look. Men are kind of clueless idiots a lot of the time, but are you sure he doesn’t want more with you?”

Am I?

I felt sure at the time.

Everything seemed clear this morning.

But was it? Or was Miles confused by my unclear question, making his response confusing too? “Well, I asked him if he wanted to get together again, and he asked what I wanted.”

“And what did you say?”

I flash back to this morning. “Something about . . . more.”

William arches a brow. “More? Like, more donuts, more pizza, more TV, more banging, more love, or more family?”

I flap my hands around.

“Just more . . .” I lower my face.

Oh, God. Did I actually spell it out? Or did it come out like I was asking for more of his divine body—which, to be fair, I wouldn’t turn down? “I think I might have possibly, accidentally, asked for just more banging.”

William laughs. “So he thinks you want more sex? Good job asking for love, Roxy.”

“But isn’t that what he wants?”

William scoffs. “I’m not going to pretend to know what he wants. He’s a big boy, and he can tell you himself, and you’re a big girl, and you can tell him yourself. All I’m saying is it sounds like you might not have been as clear with him as you wanted, and he might have thought you meant something else.”

Multiples.

Oh hell. I said multiples. I meant multiple nights, and multiple chances to be together. But who the hell asks a man to be hers by offering multiples?

This girl.

“Maybe there might have been some miscommunication involved?” William asks.

I wring my hands and sigh, then flop my head onto his shoulder. “Do you understand why I went to a sperm bank?”

He laughs. “I completely do.”

“And this is why I can’t have nice things.”

His smile is gentle as he pets my hair again. “But if you have feelings for him, maybe you should tell him.”

A blur of fur rushes by, and I blink. Is that Gloria chasing Alan? I look up, catching sight of his flag-size tail scurrying around the corner first, followed by her bus-size rear end.

It sure is.

And it feels like it should be a sign. Role reversal and all. But really, they’re cats.

I don’t want to read anything into their behavior, and I’m not so sure I can read anything into Miles’s either.

But maybe, by the same token, I can’t expect him to read anything into mine.