Chapter 5

The next day, Audra wandered from her bedroom mid-afternoon. Lilly took a quick inventory, and stifled a sigh when she noted the wedding dress still covered her friend’s upper body. She wore it with jeans and she’d hacked at it again with something sharp. Now it met the waistband of her pants but the inches of fabric she’d removed looked to have been tied around her pale blonde hair like a headband.

Not for the first time, Lilly worried her friend had not introduced said hair to shampoo since their arrival at the Heartbreak Hotel.

And she was also starting to doubt the purported powers of the place because Audra didn’t seem to be any more lively than when they’d arrived. Lily had grave doubts that would change anytime soon.

She hopped up to grab a cold bottle of water from the mini-fridge and delivered it to the other woman. “Hey,” she said, handing it over. “Long time no see. You okay?”

“I’ve been reviewing important moments in my life,” Audra said.

“Um…oh?”

“Did you know I passed on having sex with the lead singer of Arrow our senior year?”

Lilly felt her eyes bug out. “What? How?”

“As chair of the Student Activities committee, I had a backstage pass and a responsibility to liaise.”

Liaise. Only Audra would use that word. “Why’d you never tell me? He was hot. Like hawt hot,” Lilly said, using their college-era lingo to describe the member of a popular rock band. “And why didn’t you take the opportunity?”

“Because I thought for sure I’d come out of the experience with an STD or at least a hickey.”

“But it would have been a Dash Hickok hickey,” Lilly said, ignoring the prospect of disease. “You could have had him autograph it!”

“I also had on boring cotton underwear, and worse, I wore my panties that said ‘Friday’ across the butt and the concert was on Saturday night. It was a simple mix-up on my part, but he might have thought I didn’t daily change my undies.” Audra shuddered. “What could be more humiliating?”

Lilly neglected to mention being left at the altar. “Well, you could have taken your panties off before he had a chance to see them,” she pointed out, thinking of Dash Hickock’s signature scruff on his chiseled jaw and the tattoos crawling all over his lean body. Yeah. Hawt.

Audra stared. “That never occurred to me. I, um, usually let the guy take charge of the disrobing.”

Lilly didn’t laugh at her friend. If she could cast her mind that far back—ages and ages ago—she’d have to admit she’d never been particularly assertive when it came to intimacy either.

“Anyway,” the other woman continued. “It seemed pointless to have sex with someone I never intended to see again.”

“Didn’t the band play for two nights?”

Audra gave her a look. “You get what I mean.”

“I do, but—”

“Then there was the time I refused the camel ride on that family trip to Morocco,” she said. “It was a two-day expedition and it included an overnight at an oasis.”

“I remember that. Your cousin warned you against it—she said you’d be in pain during the journey and a long time afterward, right where no woman wants to hurt.”

Audra nodded.

Lilly couldn’t figure out where the other woman was going with these reminiscences. “So now you regret missing out?”

Her friend shook her head. “Oh, no, not at all.”

Confused, Lilly perched on the arm of the sofa and narrowed her gaze. “Okay. You’re not sorry for the hookup you didn’t have with a famous rocker. You’re not sorry you didn’t snatch the opportunity of a lifetime and get your tender parts bruised by a humped dromedary.”

“Yes,” Audra said, rolling the plastic water bottle between her palms so that it crackled. “Isn’t that sad?”

Lilly rubbed her forehead. It wasn’t sad, right? Because Audra hadn’t done things she didn’t want to do.

“Don’t you get it?” her friend demanded. “It’s pitiful. I have no regrets! I always followed the rules, I always chose the sensible path. There’s not the memory of one hickey that I wish I could forget.”

“What you regret,” Lilly said slowly, thinking she might be getting it now, “is that you have no regrets.”

“Exactly,” Audra said, then strolled back to her room and shut the door.

Preoccupied with that revelation, when Lilly’s phone rang, she absently pulled it from her pocket and accepted the call without first checking the caller ID.

“There you are,” her aunt said in her Southern voice that still had Spanish moss dripping from it though she’d left New Orleans for Los Angeles thirty years before. “We’ve been wondering what happened to you.”

Lilly stiffened. “I gave you money on the first of the month, like always.” A preemptive payment, she’d found, kept them at bay most of the time. During her first year of full-time employment, they’d guilted her for different cash amounts on an irregular basis. The unpredictability of their requests had left her edgy and anxious. Giving them a standard amount on the same day every month had solved at least some of the problem.

“Your uncle Claude’s truck broke down last week.”

But it hadn’t solved all of the problem.

As her blood pressure began to rise, Lilly pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger and tried reminding herself she didn’t need to respond.

“And François…” Aunt Mariellen said her son’s first name with a flourish that the thirty-one-year-old wouldn’t appreciate, as he was known to his bar-mates as Frank. “Well, the poor boy broke a tooth and needs to get it fixed.”

“How awful for him,” Lilly said. “How did that happen?”

The ensuing silence told her what she needed to know. Frank had likely gotten in a fist fight over a beer tab, someone else’s woman, or the color of the sky at night.

“I’m sure it doesn’t matter,” her aunt said, a hint of steel in her voice.

“You’re right, you’re right,” Lilly heard herself hasten to say, the inner abandoned kid in her responding to any hint of censure from this woman.

“I told François you are so grateful for all those years we kept you and cared for you, that you’d want to help a little more this month.”

A mix of misery and frustration roiled in Lilly’s belly. She placed her palm there, rubbing in small circles to contain the bitterness. Now was not the time to debate the word “care” or mention the lump sum Lilly’s maternal grandmother had given her uncle and aunt for her upkeep when her mother had gone MIA.

“He and your uncle Claude dropped by your offices this afternoon hoping to pick up a check. The people there said you were out for a few days.” Her aunt sounded affronted by the idea.

Lilly fought the urge to appease her. Old habits die hard. “That’s right,” she said in a neutral voice. “I’m in Santa Barbara, at The Hathaway Hotel.” The instant the words left her mouth she wished them back. She’d only meant to make clear she was far enough away that she couldn’t drop what she was doing and rush them funds. Mentioning the resort, however, would be sure to catch the other woman’s avaricious interest.

“The Hathaway Hotel,” she said. “Aren’t you fancy?”

“Not really.” Lilly, however, made a mental note to increase her monthly payment to them by 10 percent, regardless of how that would disorder her personal budget. “Someone else is picking up the bill.”

“Lilly.” Aunt Mariellen was practically purring now. “Have you finally snagged yourself a wealthy benefactor?”

“No.” She raked her fingers through her hair. God. The other woman said “wealthy benefactor” like some character out of a Southern Gothic play. “It’s nothing like that.”

“I wouldn’t look down on you, even if he’s married,” the older woman assured her. “A girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do.”

“This girl can take care of herself and her own bills,” Lilly said stiffly. Not to mention yours.

The other woman clicked her tongue. “No reason to get defensive. I didn’t raise you to be so snappish.”

“Yes, well.” Lilly took a long breath and decided it was time to end the call before she indulged in her new habit of throwing phones. “I have to go now. When I get back to LA, I’ll see about getting you some extra funds if you still need them.”

Without waiting for a reply, she ended the call and powered off the device.

“Who were you talking to?” Audra said, reentering the living area from her room.

“Oh, just one of the reasons I can’t afford a therapist.” Because of the money Lilly paid the Durands each month and because no amount of time with a mental health professional would manage to loosen the barbed wire binding her heart.

“Claude or Mariellen?” Audra asked, who knew nearly all of Lilly’s secrets.

“Mariellen. Claude’s truck broke down. Frank broke a tooth.”

“Let me guess. In a bar brawl over someone else’s girlfriend, the last buffalo wing on the platter, or what you do with grass when it gets too long.”

Lilly sent her friend a smile. “This is why we’re BFFs. Our minds work in such similar ways.”

“We are similar,” Audra agreed. “For different reasons, we’ve avoided taking risks and are over-anxious about the possibility of making mistakes.”

“Um, thanks for that,” Lilly said, now uncomfortable.

Audra shrugged. “I meant to ask before, have you heard anything from Alec? Anything about Jacob, I mean?”

Fresh guilt poured into Lilly. Not only had she not asked Alec if he’d heard from the ex-groom, but she’d still not told the other woman that the Thatchers were vacationing at The Hathaway and that she’d spent some time with them. “Um…well…”

She swallowed, hard, aware she was stalling like mad. “About Alec…”

Audra pointed a finger at her, gun-pantomime style. “‘Thinkin’ Bout You,’ Frank Ocean.”

Their game, the one that identified the right song for the precise moment. But if Lilly recalled, that song was about some guy mooning over a lover—or an ex-lover? In any case, it didn’t work in this case. “I’m not pining over Alec,” she said. “It’s just that…well…”

Audra just stared at her, unblinking.

Her friend’s pale blue eyes acted like interrogation lights and Lilly found herself babbling her confession. First, that he and his family were also staying at the resort. Next, that she’d found herself in his company more than once.

“He throws me off-course,” she told Audra. “I say I’m not going to be around him then he’s around and we’re talking and it’s fun and he seems like a nice guy, which is definitely all wrong for me.”

Audra raised her brows. “Why’s a nice guy all wrong for you?”

“Because…” Shaking her head, Lilly thought of that devastating kiss he’d laid on her, the way her pulse stumbled whenever he was near, the fact that he could recite the size of a blue whale’s penis from memory and the wicked glint in his eye as he’d shared the fact. “Because I sense he’s really not just ‘nice.’ There are depths there—”

“You have depths too.”

“Exactly why I don’t want to be involved with him. We might drown each other.”

For a moment, something sparked to life in Audra’s eyes. “Has involvement been mentioned?”

“Only in that we both don’t want a relationship. But, God, that doesn’t seem to stop—” She forced herself to take a breath, still bewildered by her over-the-top response to him. “Okay, the deal is, he’s hawt too and for some reason that’s messing me up.”

“Oh, dear—”

“But I’ll talk to him anyway,” Lilly hastened to say. She was supposed to be helping her friend, wasn’t she? “I’ll get what info I can about Jacob.”

“Then you’ll go back to avoiding Alec but failing?”

Before Lilly could respond with more than a grimace, Audra added two more cents. “Why don’t you stop fighting it and go get some regrets instead? For God’s sake, one of us should.”

 

“I can’t believe you talked me into this,” Alec said to his second cousin Jessie Hathaway, Kane’s sister.

“What are you talking about?” she replied, with all the enthusiasm of someone twenty-five and carelessly beautiful. “This is total fun.”

She was a beachy looking honey blonde with long straight hair and legs to match. Not that Alec could see much of her looks at the moment, since they stood in complete blackness, the only illumination coming from the glow-in-the-dark coasters set on the tall table they were bellied up to and the neon ring Jessie wore on her head like a crown.

Upon entry to this standalone banquet facility tucked into the resort’s rear grounds, all cell phones were checked like coats. Then women were given the plastic head pieces. Men were not. Alec didn’t know the motivation for the gender distinction—females were identifiable to eliminate an excuse for “accidental” groping by his bad-mannered brethren? Because the organizers knew any self-respecting guy wouldn’t walk around with a neon halo on his head?

“A pop-up bar,” he grumbled now, wondering how he was supposed to get another beer when he could barely see five inches in front of him. Around the room were more tables and more people, shadows against shadows. They’d found a space in a corner, so there were walls on two sides of him. “Who likes to put the unexpected into their drinking?”

Jessie laughed. He saw her hand reach toward her wineglass. Opting for safety, Alec kept his bottle of craft brew in his fist. “I told you it’s a fundraiser.”

“For?”

“A group that provides eye exams and necessary treatment, from surgery to glasses, for needy kids.”

He grunted. “Sort of makes sense then, the blackout.”

“That’s the idea. They’ve talked about trying a dining experience next year.”

Alec frowned. “Don’t count me in. I can’t imagine trying to feed myself in the dark.”

She nudged him with her elbow. “You’re such a stick-in-the-mud. When did my Thatcher cousin become so unadventurous?”

He told himself he wasn’t offended. His siblings had always been the family free spirits and it had never bothered him. His younger sister Joanna—Jojo—had the corner on impetuousness, which is why she’d foolishly married a guy only out to get a green card and now was recovering from a nasty divorce. As for this brother…

“I was never adventurous. Simon’s the one who—”

“Not just Simon,” Jessie said, interrupting Alec. “You weren’t always so risk-averse, I’m telling you. I remember it was you who came up with the impromptu Sled Olympics that winter vacation in Big Bear.”

“Yeah, and I recall I injured myself.”

“Only your pride, silly,” Jessie said, laughing again. “When you landed on your ass in that huge snowdrift.”

Alec found himself laughing with her, remembering the shocking cold and the raucous glee of his siblings and cousins. “Then Simon took off too soon and landed on top of me.” The pleasure of the memory felt good. Too often thinking of the past shrouded him in a heavy gloom. Which was why he kept most of his reminiscing at bay by spending long hours at the office, occupying himself with paperwork and number-crunching.

I think we all retreated to our preferred refuges.

Unwilling to consider it, Alec turned his focus to his younger cousin. “So, what’s new in your life, Messy Jessie?”

He couldn’t see her glare but he could definitely feel it. “You know I hate that nickname.”

Aware it would further her wrath, he suppressed the urge to chuck her beneath the chin. “I suppose you’ve come a long way from mud pies.”

“I’m a hospitality professional,” she said, with exaggerated dignity.

“One who used to make desserts out of wet dirt and sleep with a duck.”

“That was only for three days!”

“Until your mom found out.” Alec smirked. “You’d still be snoozing with Quacky if you could get away with it.”

“Speaking of sleeping…” Her hair fanned out and she seemed to be taking in the other bar patrons. “I should circulate. Maybe meet someone I’m not related to who I find attractive enough to take home with me.”

Alarmed, Alec glanced around the room. “You can’t see well enough to pick any of these guys out of a lineup.”

He sensed the roll of her eyes. “I’m not planning on finding a criminal.”

“Jessie.” Alec tried telling himself she was an adult. “Take my advice and be very careful.”

Her hand found his cheek, patted. “Of course I will. But maybe you should take my advice too. Do something spontaneous. Shut down that brain of yours, get out of this corner, and let go a little.”

Without another word or warning, his cousin moved away, disappearing into the darkness.

It took fifteen seconds for Alec’s protective instincts to kick in, because that brain she’d encouraged him to shut down went into overdrive instead, conjuring up storylines straight out of a season of Law & Order SVU. “Fuck,” he muttered, setting his beer bottle on an illuminated coaster. He wasn’t going to be easy unless he had the younger woman in his sights.

Wandering the room presented difficulties. Not just because of the darkness, but the space had filled up so he kept being forced to dodge men who materialized at the last minute in front of him. Maybe they all should have worn the glowing crowns, he thought, or skipped this ordeal altogether. To him, it seemed a particularly stupid way to socialize.

At the door, the person to whom he’d paid the cover charge had babbled something about the lack of light allowing patrons to better appreciate the nuances of the beers and wine on offer. Yeah, right. From the sounds of this crowd, they were using the darkness as an excuse to engage in some very well-oiled merrymaking all in preparation for some vigorous, near-anonymous boinking.

Christ, Alec thought, coming to such an abrupt halt that the person at his back crashed into him, causing him to grab a nearby table to maintain his balance. I do sound like an old fogey.

He had nothing against vigorous, near-anonymous boinking. As a matter of fact, in the past, it was the kind of boinking he’d enthusiastically engaged in.

A hand tugged at the tail of his shirt. “Alec?”

He glanced over his shoulder. A neon-red ring cast a rosy tone to platinum hair. “Tina?” he said, turning carefully in the crowded space to face her.

“I didn’t know you’d be here,” she said.

“No. Well…” Since her arrival, he’d taken pains to put distance between them. Though they’d been exclusive at the time they’d dated, it had been easy to let the relationship go as he was consumed by other, much more pressing concerns. When he’d finally managed to poke his head up again, he’d not even been the slightest bit tempted to call her. He cleared his throat. “Hope you’re having fun during Mom and Dad’s celebration. It was good of you to join in.”

“When my parents said they were booking at The Hathaway for the anniversary week, I rearranged my schedule in order to be here. I work for myself now, so that was easy.”

“Great.” She was an interior designer, and five years before already had been accruing positive word of mouth.

“We used to have such fun times,” she said now, a wistful tone to her voice.

He couldn’t clearly make out the expression on her face, so he wasn’t sure exactly how she meant that. “You’ve been able to catch up with Kane and Jessie and Amber?” In their growing-up years, Tina’s family had joined the Hathaways and the Thatchers on many occasions for barbecues and snow weekends.

“I’ve spoken with them, but those fun times I mentioned were the ones I had with you.” Her hand found his.

Now he was glad for the darkness because it could hide his dismay. Rehashing what they’d had so long ago was as unnecessary as it was uncomfortable. Without addressing her directly, he disengaged their fingers. “I’m looking for Jessie,” he said. “We came together to this thing and I feel responsible for her.”

“Oh,” Tina said. “I can help there. As I was arriving, she was departing.”

“Alone?”

“She was with a couple of other women who seemed to be friends of hers. They were talking about heading to the sauna.”

“Ah.” His purpose evaporated, he considered what excuse he could make next. “I’ve got to—”

“I’ve been wanting to say a few things.” Tina’s words rushed out as she groped for his hand again, squeezed. “Get some closure on what happened with us before, and then…well…”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m aware I sort of…dropped away when you needed me. It wasn’t very mature, of course, and I regret that I couldn’t have been a help to you and your family at that time.”

That time. The past. That heavy shroud materialized, hovering like a threat. He mentally shoved it away. “Tina, this isn’t a conversation we need to have.”

“No, I truly need to apologize.” Another squeeze of his fingers. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.”

Ill-at-ease, he pulled free of her again and slipped his hands into his pockets. “It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

“Please. Accept my apology.”

Christ. “All right. Apology accepted. Now if you’ll ex—”

“I thought we could try again.”

He went still. Huh? “Tina…”

“It was good before, wasn’t it? I haven’t forgotten how good. I’d like us to—well, not start over, but carry on, carry forward into a real future.”

Oh, what fresh hell, he thought, grimacing. How best to handle this? She was an old friend. Their parents were still close. But he’d dated her in his mid-twenties and he hadn’t been anywhere close to serious about her then. For her to ambush him now with talk of a “real future” was unthinkable.

Clearing his throat, he tried for diplomacy, despite feeling boxed-in and resenting it like hell. “Tina, that’s a really uh, flattering offer. But it’s not, I’m not…”

“What are you saying?” The note of disbelief in her voice just pissed him off.

“I’m saying no.”

The ensuing silence was loaded. Fuck.

Then she finally sighed. “I worried this might have happened. For the last five years I’ve heard things about you, you know. People have kept me informed.”

Truly puzzled, Alec frowned. “Informed of what?”

“That you have a reputation for…going through women.”

Alec stiffened.

“I hope the way I left you isn’t the reason you turned to that.”

She hadn’t “left” him. Consumed by other matters, he’d quit calling her. End of story. And the women he’d been with since then knew the score. They didn’t consider themselves having been “gone through” or taken advantage of in any way.

“Truly,” Tina continued. “I’d feel terrible if that breakup was the cause of this habit of yours.”

What the hell? “What habit?”

“Your addiction. Your addiction to, um, superficial connections. I hope that wasn’t because of me, of the way I stopped seeing you.”

Addiction? Alec put a tight hold on his temper. And she thought she’d stopped seeing him? The truth was, he’d never once thought of her, not after that devastating phone call that had changed his family’s lives. Not for months and months, anyway, and by then she was part of the before when he and his family were struggling with carrying on into the after.

As bar-goers shifted around them, he shoved a hand through his hair and wondered if there was a graceful way to end this conversation and if he felt like being graceful at all. “Look, Tina…”

A body brushed past him and a familiar, feminine scent tickled his nose. Without thinking, his hand reached out and he snatched the warm arm of someone passing by.

The someone squeaked as he reeled her closer and relief and pleasure twined inside him. “Lilly. I’ve been looking for you.”

From his other side, Tina piped up. “I thought you were looking for Jessie.”

“And Lilly,” he said, lying like a rug. “We have something important to discuss.” Already he was moving away, so that she couldn’t contradict him in front of the other woman.

“As a matter of fact, we do need to talk,” Lilly said, obligingly following him through the crowd. “I was actually looking for you.”

“Yeah?” There was a huge jam at the exit, so he turned around and headed for the rear in hopes of finding another. It was slow going, because they had to wind their way around knots and pairs and the occasional singleton who stood unhelpfully like a boulder in a stream.

Alec cursed beneath his breath and yanked Lilly closer, wrapping his arm around her shoulders to make them one unit.

“You’re in a bad mood,” she observed.

“You would be too,” he said grimly. It was unclear if a back door was actually open, and then he remembered that the cell phones were at the front so on a sigh he turned around again.

After a few minutes he found himself unable to make any forward progress at all, and he took a stand against the nearest wall, planting his feet with a frustrated sigh. “Fuck this shit.”

“Let’s make that a really bad mood.” Lilly’s glow-in-the dark crown was a soft white that illuminated her face like a portrait captured by a photographer. Every eyelash cast a delicate shadow on her cheeks and his attention was inexorably drawn to her mouth, a tantalizing pink even in the low light. “What happened?”

He lowered his voice. “Tina happened.”

“Tina happened how?”

“First, she essentially called me a womanizer,” he admitted, and it still stung.

“You said you used to date her.”

“Right. Five years ago. Then…things happened that didn’t make that a priority and I let it go.”

“Let her go.”

“I guess, though I think—I thought it was mutual. But now she’s says she wants a do-over.”

“Oh.”

“And I don’t,” he hastened to say. “But I also don’t think she’s used to rejection.”

“Likely not.” Lilly seemed to ponder that. “Is that when she called you a womanizer?”

“And worse,” he said, indignation spiking. “She hinted I’m a sex addict.”

Lilly started to laugh. “I’m sorry,” she said when he just stared at her. “But you can’t take that seriously. She’s a beautiful woman who wants you, a beautiful woman who’s not used to hearing the word no.”

“I suppose.” Alec clipped out the words.

“Don’t you see? You’ve been with other women, but then along comes lovely Tina to save you from all that normal, male-in-his-prime behavior. When you so easily refuse her offer she can only conclude you must have some sort of mental disease or defect.”

As Lilly continued to chuckle, Alec felt his temper cool. Drawing nearer, he cupped her cheek in his palm. “What you’re saying is I’m an idiot for letting her get to me.”

“Her ego,” Lilly suggested.

“I’m an idiot for letting her ego get to me.”

He was close enough to see the corners of her mouth tip up in a smile. “An idiot but not a sex addict.”

Staring at her lips and breathing in her particular, pleasing scent, he wasn’t so sure of that. Because he was ravenous to kiss her again, to inhale her taste, to have her body molded to his. “Lilly,” he murmured.

Yeah, he wanted another kiss and more, despite all their reservations and those walls of hers that could seem impenetrable. Her small fingers wrapped around his wrist but they weren’t trying to push him away, they were holding him in place.

“Lilly,” he whispered again, that naughty name of hers such a delight in his mouth. He leaned down and—

Pop! An explosive noise penetrated the walls of the building. A woman screamed. A second did the same. In the next moment everyone went still and then in another it was pandemonium as people started moving. Glass hit the ground, bottles and wineglasses crashing to the floor as people bumped into tables and into each other in their haste to flee in the dark from the unknown threat.

Glancing over his shoulder at the chaos, Alec caged Lilly against the wall with his body, instinctively protecting her from flying elbows and stomping feet. “Turn on the lights,” he yelled, trying to be heard over the din. “For God’s sake, someone turn on the lights.”

But when the darkness remained as black as ever, he pulled back a few inches from Lilly. “Wait here,” he said, unwilling to haul her through the panicking crowd. “Wait right here and I’ll be back for you, I promise.”

It didn’t register, then, that she hadn’t made a sound.

Long minutes passed as he made his way out of the building to an outside courtyard that was as dark as inside the facility. The landscape lighting was out or off as well. As patrons continued to stream from the building, Alec caught sight of his second cousin, Kane, jogging forward with flashlight in hand.

Alec flagged him down. “What the hell happened?”

“One of the night maintenance guys hit a transformer with his truck. The electricity’s out at this part of the resort.”

“Everyone’s cell phones were checked.”

“Yeah. Someone already brought them back to the lobby. You can pick yours up there. Five minutes and we’ll have staff lighting the way.”

“Good. Okay. Anything I can do?”

“Nope. All in a night’s work in the hospitality biz.” Kane grinned. “Gotta go.”

“Yeah.”

Alec redirected his attention to the building’s exit, where men and women straggled through, their relieved expressions discernible as more staff arrived with portable lanterns. He expected Lilly any second, but as the line of people coming out of the structure trickled to nothing, he still didn’t spy her.

Where was she? Had she left from some other exit or had he missed her while talking with Kane?

Then Alec thought of his instructions. Wait right here and I’ll be back for you, I promise.

With a curse, he ran for the entrance where a skinny guy was just crossing the threshold, a small flashlight in hand. “Everybody’s out, man,” he said. In the glow from the lanterns, Alec saw his polo shirt read “Oscuro Events.” Oscuru was “dark” in Spanish.

“I’ll just check for myself.” Alec grabbed the flashlight from the guy and shouldered past him.

Maybe it was Alec’s air of authority, or his grimace of worry, but the other man didn’t object as he rushed into the still-dark space and the heavy door closed behind him.

Trying to get his bearings, Alec glanced around as he moved farther inside. The coasters had dimmed to nearly nothing and his feet crunched over broken glass.

“Lilly?” he called softly, some instinct warning him to go gently. “Are you here, sugar?”

A sound alerted him to the left rear of the room. A stifled sob?

“It’s Alec,” he said, following the noise. “I came back for you. All’s well now.”

Running the flashlight’s small spot of yellow illumination around the area, he noticed that a belly table had been knocked over. As he drew nearer, he could make out a small figure sheltered behind it, her legs folded to her chest, arms surrounding them, forehead to her knees. Something moved through his chest, more than relief, more than sympathy. Tenderness, both sharp and sweet, like a paper cut, he thought, as he dragged the piece of furniture away from Lilly.

He crouched down. “Are you hurt?”

Her head shot up. She shook it.

“Okay.” Instead of drawing her to her feet immediately, he operated on instinct and dropped to the floor beside her. “Other than not hurt, how are you?”

“Fabulous,” she said, with a faint heartiness that didn’t have him fooled. With her lousy sense of direction, the dark and the chaos had likely confused and alarmed her, big time. “Really, I’m just fine. I needed a moment to…to get my bearings, so I took a seat right here.”

Still obeying instinct, he lifted Lilly to sit sideways on his lap.

“Hey,” she protested, struggling. “What are you—”

“Shh.” He wrapped his arms around her, trying to cease her wiggling. “I need a moment now. I got a little rattled myself when I couldn’t find you.”

Her movements subsided. “Oh, all right,” she said, as if put out. But when she relaxed into the curve of his body, he felt a tremor run through her.

He tightened his hold and pressed a soft kiss to the top of her hair. “Why didn’t you leave with the others? Were you terribly disoriented?”

After a long moment she answered. “You promised you’d come back for me.”

Another paper cut, and then another, a thousand of them, all torturous and all so fucking gratifying as well, because Lilly’s words implied she trusted him—or at least wanted to. You promised you’d come back for me. And she’d waited for him.

God, Alec thought. The idea of that hurt so damn good.

He squeezed shut his eyes to ride out the ache even as he pulled her more closely against him, all the while aware it was sending the wrong message. He of all people should know never to promise anything.