Pausing in front of the door, I run a hand through my hair. Shifting the bouquet of flowers and bottle of wine into one arm, I take a breath. This is the house Harlow grew up in and it’s time to meet her stepmom. I’m not sure what to think of her. What I’ve heard doesn’t paint her in a favorable light, but Harlow hasn’t really told me too many details about her. I get the impression they’re not close. I’m hoping to know more after dinner tonight.

I knock and it’s only a few seconds before the door swings open. A breathless Harlow answers with a large smile. Her eyes shine brightly with excitement and I hope I have something to do with how happy she seems. “Hey,” she squeals and throws her arms around me. Yep, I do. Wrapping an arm around her, I do my best to avoid crushing the flowers and dropping the wine.

“Hi. It’s so good to see you.” I squeeze her tight, placing a kiss on top of her head. “I missed you.” We haven’t seen each other for two weeks now and have only talked on the phone. I’m not a fan of phone calls, but I’ve learned to make an exception for Harlow. I needed to hear her voice as much as she wanted to hear mine.

I went to New York for a week and then to my mom’s for Christmas. We both agreed I’d come here for dinner tonight and then Harlow will return to Boston with me. Tomorrow is New Year’s Eve.

I’m looking forward to two weeks of uninterrupted time with her. My roommates are all spending the rest of the school break with their families so we’ll have the whole apartment to ourselves.

“Give me those lips, kitten. I’ve been too long without them,” I growl, my face against her neck. She tips her face up and my hand grips the back of her hair tugging her head back. Her eyes flare with surprise and then desire as my lips move closer. The first contact is whisper soft. My mouth moves over hers, barely making contact, teasing us both. Her warm breath fans over my lips in a soft sigh and all thought of teasing her is gone. Pressing my lips to hers, my tongue tastes her plump bottom lip before diving inside to become reacquainted with hers. She moans into my mouth and leans every inch of her tight body into me.

Our kiss quickly grows heated and my body responds to her touch. I want to fuck her hard against the front door, the rest of the world be damned. I want to - but I can’t. Tearing my mouth from hers, I rest my forehead on hers and wait for my breathing to slow.

“To be continued later,” I say with a chuckle.

Her hand slips between us and she grips my cock through my jeans. “Are you sure?”

I groan and briefly enjoy the pleasurable sensation of her fingers roaming up and down my hard length, before I pull her hand away.

“You need to behave, kitten. I want nothing more than to slam you into this door and take you hard and fast, but now is not the time.”

Her eyes gleam with desire and it’s all I can do to keep myself in control. I clench my teeth together and glance away from the temptation she presents with her shiny lips and the tight white sweater she’s wearing.

Releasing her from my hold, I take a step backward. I need some space between us. It’s been too long since we were together and I missed her even more than I expected. “Let’s get inside so I can get you back to my place sooner.” I wink.

“I like the way you think.” She winks back and I grin at how adorable she is. She spins around and I follow her inside. My eyes scan the open entryway of the typical New England Colonial style home, while she pushes the door closed. There’s a tall stairway almost directly in front of us and a railing running across the second-floor balcony.

“Here, give me your coat,” she says holding out her hand. Maneuvering the wine and flowers I’m holding, I manage to shrug it off. She hangs it in a closet near the front door. Taking me by the hand, she says, “Cindy is in the kitchen preparing dinner.”

I can hear the sounds of her cooking and the delicious aroma has my mouth watering. The water from the faucet is running. The clanging of pots and the sound of dishes being put away, all register in my ears as we’re only a few steps from the doorway.

My stomach feels a little unsettled and I’m not sure why. I’ve never worried about making a good impression on someone when I meet them, but I’ve never been in love before. I’ve never had a reason to care until now which changes everything. I run a hand through my hair and glance down at my black untucked button down shirt. This is as good as it’s going to get. Hopefully, she’ll think I’m a good fit for Harlow.

The kitchen is large and brightly lit with maple cabinets running the length of the room up to a large sliding glass door. Harlow’s stepmom is at the sink with her back to us.

“Brady’s here,” Harlow announces over the sound of water running. We stop about five feet from her and wait for her to finish what she’s doing. She wipes her hands on a dish towel before turning around. “I’m Cindy,” she says.

My eyes scan over her taking in her deep red hair and the bright pink of her lips. My heart feels like it stops and then pounds against my chest when I see the rest of her face. My throat feels like I’ve swallowed a boulder. No, this can’t be fucking happening.

Her face briefly registers shock and then moves to a smile as she walks toward me.

No. No. No. I shout inside my head with every step she takes, moving closer. She holds her hand out and I don’t want to touch her, but I know it’s inevitable. When our skin touches, she smirks and I feel nauseous. I know my whole world is about to implode in the worst fucking way possible.

“Brady, huh? We never exchanged names that night, did we?” The scent of her floral perfume dredges up unwanted memories. My stomach clenches and rolls. I feel sick.

I don’t say anything. All I can think of is the hurt this is going to cause Harlow.

“Come on, don’t be shy now, sugar,” she says.

“Do you guys know each other?” Harlow asks, glancing back and forth between Cindy and me.

I remain silent. I can’t get past the lump in my throat to find the words to answer.

“Oh you could say that,” she replies looking like the cat who just ate the canary.

“I don’t understand,” Harlow frowns, tucking her hair behind an ear.

Cindy opens her mouth to answer and I interrupt. “Can I talk to you for a minute?” I gesture with my head that I want to leave the kitchen.

She nervously chews on her bottom lip. “Sure. We’ll be back in a few minutes,” she calls over her shoulder as I tug her along with me. Once we reach the entryway, I stop and turn to face her. Taking a deep breath, I study the way her hand fits in mine.

Please don’t let this be the last time I’m ever this close to her.

“I need to tell you something and you might hate me after you hear it.”

She shakes her head. “I won’t. Just tell me.”

“I had sex with your stepmother,” I blurt out, ripping the band aid clear off.

She gasps, dropping my hand and rubbing her palm along her thigh as if it burned her. “No,” she whispers.

“I didn’t know who she was,” I quickly spit out. “I met her at a bar and we went back to her hotel room. We…”

“Stop,” she shouts interrupting my hurtful words. Her eyes are tear filled. “I don’t want the play by play. When did this happen? Were we together?” Her voice cracks and her hand covers her mouth as the tears begin to fall.

I grip her upper arms and stare down into her sad gray eyes. “No, it was before school started. It was meaningless. We didn’t even exchange names.”

“Well that makes it all better,” she says, sarcasm dripping from her tone.

“I know it doesn’t make it better.” I shake my head. “I know nothing I can say will make this any easier for you. All I can say is I’m sorry. I wish I had made better decisions before I met you.”

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” She takes a step back, breaking my hold on her. “I think it would be best if you left now.”

“Harlow, no. I…” My words freeze in my throat when I take in her stricken expression. Nothing I can say at this point will matter. She needs time to process what she just learned and come to grips with the horrible truth. If that’s even a possibility.

This might be the last time we speak. “I love you,” I grit out. My teeth clenching to keep from losing my shit. I want to punch a hole in the fucking wall.

She shakes her head, tears running down her pink cheeks before whirling around. Running up the stairs, she disappears from my sight.

I resist the urge to follow her. Instead, I grab my jacket, not bothering to put it on and as my hand closes around the metal doorknob I hear Cindy’s voice.

“I’ve thought about you often since our night together.” She moves up close to my side. I stare straight at the door.

“Did you ever think about me?” Her fingers seek my arm, tracing along my bicep.

I shrug her hand off and turn my head in her direction. I’m going to make my answer crystal clear so there’s no chance of her getting the wrong impression.

“No. I never thought of you again. You were just a meaningless fuck and the minute I walked out the door you were forgotten. I never thought about you again until you approached me outside of the lecture hall a few weeks ago. I was only being polite when you came over and hugged me. I’m in love with your daughter. She’s the only woman I want - the only woman worth remembering.”

My hand turns the knob and I slip outside. I breathe a sigh of relief as I pull the door closed behind me putting some space between me and the biggest mistake of my life. I head to my truck, but then veer off toward the garage when I catch sight of the trash barrel. Flipping open the cover, I drop the flowers and bottle of wine inside and then slam the top shut. I don’t want any physical reminders of this night. The ache in my chest is reminder enough.