Chapter Four
"Fuck!"
What had he done? What the fuck had he done? He wasn't ready for this. He wasn't ready to be mated to anyone, let alone a man. He didn't know what to think. Thoughts scattered like leaves in the wind and Tank was chasing them, lost and confused, scared shitless. He didn't know what to do, he’d simply panicked once sanity had returned and just freaked the fuck out and ran.
There were so many emotions rushing through his body that Tank struggled to recognize one before it was quickly replaced by another. Exhilaration, fear, panic, worry, wonder, loneliness, pain. He knew some were his emotions and others were Niles’. He couldn't turn it off, he wanted to stop feeling him, and in that moment, he’d give anything to cut the bond between them and just breathe.
He pulled over without indicating, causing the car behind to beep its horn and the driver to flip him off as he drove past. He put it into park, his head dropping onto the steering wheel, and tried to break the unfamiliar emotions swamping him.
Despair, pain, anger... Love. Tank sat up abruptly and stared out of the windshield, not seeing anything. Love. Niles loved him. He bit his fist, shaking his head, groaning deeply. Aw, shit. Niles loved him. What was he going to do now? He couldn't hurt Niles, but he couldn't be with him either. His family... Shit, his family could never find out.
He needed to talk to someone, someone who could help him. Someone who had experience.
He grabbed his cell, the phone shaking in his hand, and it took several fumbled attempts before he could unlock it and dial the number he wanted.
"Tank, man," Chester said when he answered.
"I need help," Tank muttered brokenly.
"What's wrong?" Chester demanded.
"Oh, shit, man. I've mated with Niles."
A soft chuckle greeted his comment. "Congrats, Tank. I knew—”
"No!" Tank shouted out. "This isn't time for congratulations. What the fuck am I going to do now?"
"Not again," Chester muttered. In a louder voice, he added, "Tank, listen to me, it’s time to man the fuck up. You're mated, there is nothing you can do to change that. Just think of the benefits—you'll live longer, be stronger and move faster. Remember Jared and Miguel jumping from the plane? You can do that now. You have a connection to someone who will never leave you. And, more importantly, never cheat on you."
Tank breathed raggedly, emotions—were they Niles’s—flowing over him. "I don't care! I don't want this. I can't stop feeling him. Make it stop!"
Chester sighed. "You're mated. It won't stop."
Tank hung up and contemplated throwing his cell but decided to call Ale.
As soon as he answered, Tank shouted, "How did you do it?"
"Tank? What's wrong?"
"The mating! How do you make it stop, how did you stay away from him?"
"Tank. What are you talking about?"
"Me and Niles. How do I stop our mating?"
"You don't have sex and then let him bite you?" Ale spoke like he was talking to a child, not an adult.
Tank thumped the steering wheel, screaming, "Fuck, fuck, fuck!"
"Oh, I see. Well, then congratulations, Tank, and there is no way to break the mating, sorry. I searched everywhere and there's nothing."
"Nothing!" Tank screeched. "There has to be something. I'm not gay. I can’t have a male mate."
Ale sighed. "Hate to point out the obvious, but if you've mated, you had sex with a man."
"I'm. Not. Gay," Tank screamed down the cell. "I like women, tits and pussy."
Sighing again, Ale said, "Thanks for the visual. You've had sex with Niles and you've mated. Did you get off?" Tank snapped his mouth shut. Yeah, he got off. "So, you came. You enjoyed it. What's the problem here, Tank? Is it because Niles has a dick? You obviously had no problem with said dick when you were having sex with him."
"I didn't touch him. I'm not gay."
"Dick and ass. Two men. Where do you possibly see straight here, Tank?" Ale sighed yet again. "Okay, so you're bisexual. I still don't see a problem with this."
"I'm straight! I love pussy. Pussy, Ale."
"Okay, I'm going. Lie to yourself all you want, Tank, but don't lie to me."
"Fuck, no, wait. I don't know what I'm saying."
"You're in shock, Tank. You've done something you never thought you would. How did it happen?"
Tank growled, remembering what happened. "There was a doctor at Niles' and he was kissing him. He's mine, Ale. Mine. He shouldn't have been kissing what's mine."
"Not territorial at all," Ale mused. "Nothing screams mate more than that. Look, it's done, you can't change it. I should know because I looked for a long time to break mine and Troy's. Don't screw up like I did. It will cause you both nothing but pain and misery. If you accept it, and work on it, you'll be happier than you have ever been. Trust me on that, Tank. Yes, I screwed up the beginning of my mating with Troy, but now, I wouldn't change a thing."
Wiping a hand over his face, Tank muttered, "Shit, Ale. I'm sorry."
"Nah, it's okay now. Just talk to him. He's gonna be feeling everything you are unless you shut the connection off."
"Okay. Okay."
"Now would be good, Tank."
Nodding, Tank said, “I'll do it now, and thanks, Ale."
"I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did. Niles doesn't deserve that. No one does."
Tank rolled his eyes. "Okay, Ale. I'll do it now."
"Right, speak to you later."
Tank ended the call and threw his cell on the seat next to him then stared out of the windshield. His stomach rolled and churned dangerously, the bile inching up his throat, and he coughed several times, blinking rapidly trying to clear it.
He gripped the steering wheel in his hands. A cold sweat broke out over his skin, and his heart began to beat rapidly in his chest, the blood pumping through his veins. He panted, squeezing his eyes shut, his grip tightening on the steering wheel. He didn't want this mating. He didn't want to be tied to a man. He couldn't be tied to a man. He had nothing against Niles, he was a really great guy, but a male mate was not something he was looking for.
He should have known something would happen though. He could feel the bond between them, feel the connection that strummed between them. He'd ignored it for as long as he could, trying to get on with his life and move on. He should never have approached Niles in the parking lot at the hospital that night. He should never have agreed to have a meal with him. He should have simply avoided Niles at all costs and moved on with his life.
He was sure Niles would have eventually taken the hint and would have found someone else who could make him happy.
Now, there were tied together, forever, and Tank was terrified.
The repercussions if his family found out... Tank didn't want to think about it. He could already see his parents’ reactions in his mind. The fallout that would occur if they were to find out that not only was Tank with the man, but that man was a vampire. Oh, and one with darker skin than him. Yeah, his parents hated everyone who didn't look like them.
They would disown him. Tank knew with absolute certainty that his family would have nothing more to do with him were they to find out what had happened. He needed to keep quiet, tell as few people as possible. They were his family, had raised him since the day he was born, had done so much for him, sacrificed so much that he could follow his dreams.
What was he going to do? He knew Niles wouldn't want to keep it a secret. Why would he? He’d found his mate and even Tank knew how rare that was. No, Niles would want to tell everyone, and Tank needed Niles to understand that even though they were mated, that was it. He needed to talk to his mate and lay it all out, plain and simple.
Niles.
Targon.
Can we talk? Tank winced, rubbing his head as the pain began.
Come back. The food's still here. We can eat and talk.
Okay. Ten minutes.
Tank ended the connection and slumped back in his seat, his head pounding. Literally a few seconds of telepathic communication and his head felt like it was about to explode. It took several minutes before he felt like he could open his eyes and a couple more before he was able to start the car, put it into drive, and head towards Niles’ home.
The entire time he was on the road he was double guessing himself. Had he made the right decision to go to Niles? Should he be doing this after everything that had just happened? Did he need time to adjust to the consequences of his actions?
By the time he had reached Niles, he still had no answers. He pulled to a stop and parked his truck. He sat staring at Niles who was stood at the front door, and with one last deep breath, he opened the door and stepped out.
He walked to his mate and stood in front of him. What the fuck was he going to do now?