CHAPTER 1
Chance
“So what do you like to do for fun?”
The blonde with puffed up lips and even more inflated breasts leans in closer. She rotates her elbow on the cherry wood table exposing her right wrist and forearm to me before she slowly drags the first two fingers from her left hand down the length of her right forearm. She brings the first two fingers on her right hand back and rests them on that big lower lip of her mouth, which is now open wider than I thought humanly possible. She’s not leaving much to the imagination.
Her eyes narrow as her penciled in left eyebrow raises even higher.
She studies my eyes hoping my line of sight will drop to the permanent cleavage her surgeon was kind enough to bless her with. Her breasts are resting on the table, and the deep V-neck T-shirt she probably picked up at Baby Gap is doing everything in its power to keep from stretching one more millimeter until it explodes, like the rest of the guys’ eyes in this joint look like they’re about ready to do.
Not mine.
As a Las Vegas police officer I’m more than familiar with the term entrapment, and I’m not about to walk down this path. Speaking of paths she looks like she’s permanently stuck in a wind tunnel with gusts well over 100 mph coming right at her. I didn’t know that kind of facelift was making a comeback.
“You know all there is to know about me, Cinnamon. I’m a cop with an inescapable set of handcuffs. Not to mention I carry a nightstick and loaded weapon.”
I’m not sure it’s possible to play into her fantasy any more.
I’m only doing what the good doc tells me to do. The shrink they’ve got at the station tells me I need to “move on.” Move on? Are you fucking kidding me? And to make matters worse my dad’s been trying to get me to go out with this girl for half a year. Apparently it’s the daughter of one of his biggest campaign donors from the last election cycle.
Talk about taking one for the team. I’m taking two. One because my station’s watching me like a hawk. They’re looking for any reason to drop me. Two my dad’s whoring me out for campaign cash.
I’m not complaining though. I’m a grown man and I can make my own decisions. I chose to be here and I’ll deal with the consequences…which right now mean sex with this girl who’s “super popular and stuff on Instagram.” Sex and nothing more.
“Inescapable?” she says. “That sounds like a challenge I’m willing to accept.” Her fingertips come off her forearm and wrap around the stem of her martini glass. She doesn’t even break eye contact. A professional at this, no doubt.
She raises the glass towards her mouth before carefully maneuvering it out and around those Miss Potato Head lips of hers. Then she leans in and takes a sip, making sure to leave a lipstick print along the rim.
“I think that’s the widest lipstick print I’ve ever seen.”
“I’ve got a big mouth,” she says.
“I didn’t notice. Seems like you’ve been pretty quiet this evening.”
“Not like that, silly,” she says. Is she coy or oblivious to the amount of work she’s really had done on herself? “It’s big in other ways.”
“Oh,” I say.
“Let’s just say it’s also…inescapable. Whenever something touches my lips I don’t let go…until I’ve swallowed every last drop.”
I feel like I’m inside an eighteen-year-old boy’s fantasy. It’s the last place I ever want to be. Didn’t she get the memo? I’m a single dad trying like hell to raise a daughter. And one I specifically don’t want turning out like Cinnabuns here. Or was it Cinnamon?
She suddenly dives for her little purse that’s barely longer than a Kleenex box and shiner than a disco ball. “Sorry, I have to take this,” she says. She walks toward the restrooms.
I tip back my vodka soda and wish I was at home playing checkers with Charlotte. My eyes light up just thinking about my little girl.
I feel my pants pocket vibrate and I reach for my own phone.
Date going well? She’s a real looker huh?
My dad’s checking up on me? Must be a really big donation he’s expecting.
Stunning
I roll my eyes as I type.
Have fun tonight
I shove the phone back in my pocket and finish my drink. How old does my dad think I am? And does he think he and I are both high schoolers and he’s one of my pals?
Worst of all was how my dad thought he was my new relationship coach after Carissa passed. I know he’s genuine in that he wants a mother for Charlotte, but setting me up with all his politically connected people’s offspring isn’t the way to go about it.
I’ll put myself out there when the time is right, if the time is ever right again.
I’m more than happy focusing my energy on my Charlotte and my job. Nothing else matters. Family is always first, and Charlotte means everything to me.
I just wish I could get my Carissa back. I’m out at that damn graveyard every day. I talk to her. Curse whoever took her from me. I even got asked to leave the graveyard once by the caretaker. “Can’t have a crazy guy out here yelling and screaming,” he said.
Yeah, I was crazy. Crazy for her. And ‘was’ isn’t the right word. I still am. Even after three years.
“Miss me?” Cinna-whatever says as she slides into the seat across from me.
“Of course,” I say. “I was about to send out the search party.”
“Well I know there’s one thing I won’t have to look hard for to find tonight.”
“Me either,” I say, knowing we’ve got two entirely different things in mind. “Check please,” I motion to the waiter. “Let me give you a ride home,” I say.
“I thought you’d never ask,” she says. I’d been thinking about it since the moment I sat down. It took me an hour to finish this one drink, and it wasn’t because I was trying to make this last any longer than it had to.
I had a half-gallon of water before I came. I’ve been hitting the weights hard these last few years and need all the hydration I can get. Lifting the heaviest weights I can find is one of the only healthy ways I know to release my aggression.
All that water had me going to the toilet and diluted the weak splash of vodka from the bartender’s one second pour. My blood alcohol content wouldn’t even register. I wasn’t about to drive if I was impaired.
“Ready to go?” I say.
“Oh…I’m more than ready,” she purrs as I slide her white fur coat over those thin shoulders of hers.
She wasn’t my type but I could see how a lot of guys would find her attractive. Rail thin. Huge tits. Big lips. All tools in her toolbox to get to a million followers on SnapFace, or InstantChat, or whatever those things on your phone are called.
“Take me drunk officer. I’m home,” she says. Definitely not the first time I’ve heard that joke, but I play along anyways.
“Right this way young lady,” I say, escorting her out the door. I may not be into her, but at least I’ll be a gentleman. I treat everyone with respect, especially women. They definitely don’t get enough of it these days, or ever for that matter. That needs to change.
The valet takes off running the minute he sees me, or more accurately sees her. He must have noticed that she arrived in a cab so he knows where this scenario is going…except that he doesn’t.
Cinnamon snuggles into me as the chill of winter bites down hard. It may not be Alaska, but it is below freezing tonight. The cold temperatures are bad enough. The gusts of wind make it even worse.
“You’re going to keep me warm, aren’t you?”
“I sure am. Heater in my 4Runner works amazingly well. Even heats the seats.”
She playfully punches me in the arm. “You’re so silly. I know this is going to be a lot of fun.”
What’s going to be fun is getting home and getting out of these clothes and hitting the weights again. I definitely need to release some aggression tonight, and pinning Cinnamon to the wall while I thrust inside her is not going to happen no matter how much she thinks it is.
I open the passenger door for her and she slithers in.
The valet looks over the top of the car and opens his mouth wide before mouthing, “Oh my god.” My thoughts exactly, but in an entirely different context.
I shut her door and tip the valet. Seconds later and we’re on our way. She’s already got one hand on my shoulder and the other on my groin.
“Big fine for distracting a driver,” I say. I shift into fifth doing everything I can to get this night to end as quickly as possible.
“I’m happy to pay it,” she says as she grabs my junk.
I see her street just up ahead. I take the turn just a second too late causing her momentum to take her grip from my rod.
“Oh. You’re a real Speedy Gonzales,” she says. “But I bet you take your time when it counts.”
“Like when my daughter and I spent an entire weekend hanging lights and decorating the house for the holidays,” I say.
She laughs like a hyena as we pull up to her house.
I’m out of the 4Runner and around to her side in no time flat. I help her out and escort her to the front door of her place.
If I didn’t know who her father was I’d be contacting our detectives in the morning asking to run a check on her. A mid-twenties-year-old girl living alone in an estate in the best part of Vegas. Including the ranch that sits behind it it’s easily worth ten million, maybe more. I don’t think showing your assets on Instagram leads to purchasing these kinds of assets.
“Time to make a bust, officer?”
“If you mean bust a move on out of here then yes. I should probably get going.”
She laughs and sticks her key in the front door, opening the lock. She tries to pull me inside but I’m too big for her to move. I don’t budge.
“Let’s go,” she says.
“I have to get going, Cinnamon. I have to pick up my daughter.”
“Your daughter? You said someone was watching her.”
“Someone is right now, but now it’s time for me to pick her up.”
“But…” she says. “We can be real quick. You can be as fast and rough as you want. I like it like that.”
“Not tonight,” I say. I conveniently leave out the “or ever” part. There’s nothing wrong with her, it’s just that I can’t.
“But why did you come back with me?”
“You took a cab. Now I’m dropping you off like a gentleman.”
“I don’t want a gentleman right now,” she says. She’s still trying to make this work. I hate to get her all fired up and then leave her high and dry, but that’s the way it has to be right now. “Maybe even just a little preview of coming attractions?”
She lunges for my belt and I grab her wrists.
“Oh…now we’re talking,” she says. “Get rough with me officer. I’m committing a crime and should be cuffed.”
She leans into me. I’ve got to end this now.
I wasn’t going to give her, or anyone, a preview of anything. I only want something that’s real, like what I had with Carissa. There was no way I was ready to open up right now. And I certainly wasn’t about to open up the castle walls and expose the mess I have going on inside me. I have to keep my guard up.
And it’s not fair either. How could I even consider anything intimate with her, or any woman, when I was still in love with my first wife? She was my best friend. My high school sweetheart. My everything.
“You’re big where it counts. I felt it in the car. I can only imagine how much bigger you get once we get inside,” she says.
“There’s no going inside,” I say. I want to tell her I’m not just talking about her home. I’m talking about my walled off life.
“Your dad told my father you were looking for a second wife,” she says.
“Don’t believe anything you hear about me unless it comes from my mouth.”
“Loser!”
“Thanks for tonight,” I say. “Sorry it’s ending this way.” I turn and walk towards my SUV. I need to remain a gentleman to the end. One day I’ll teach my daughter about the different kinds of guys. I’m not going to be a hypocrite and tell her to be with a good guy when I’m not one myself.
“Wait until I tell my father!” she yells.
Are we back in elementary school? I just keep walking.
“Asshole!”
It’s the last thing I hear just before I close the door, or at least I thought. I hear a thud and see a high heel hit the hood of my car. I look back towards her. She must be a good ten yards away. Girl has an arm. They could certainly use her on the co-ed softball team the station puts together.
But what I need right now is to get away from this. All of this.
I don’t want to be here, and I don’t want her. I don’t want anyone for that matter.
Carissa was the only girl for me. And it’s going to be that way forever.